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RE: Younger Owners - 10/16/2007 10:52:52 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: labrat18610

People age. What you thought was cool at 21, sucks when your 42. When there's a big age difference, the relationship is a temporary one. Yeah, I know somebody is going to post that even with a huge age difference, "we've been together for eons". That only means one of you hasn't grown up, yet.
Rick

For many many personality types, I believe that is very true. I believe it can depend a lot on what you (the older) can just accept rather than try to teach/fix/mother/whatever. Master has a dominant personality and certainly doesn't want a mother figure or someone to tell him what to do or how to do it. We both realize that I have more life experience than he does, and he does listen to me. However, I have to (and do) accept that he will make his own decisions for the both of us.

I may think he's about to learn something I learned years ago, and that may be true, but it's never been a horrid experience. At 25, he's got things to learn. At 39, I've got things to learn. At 50, we will both have things to learn still. Frankly, I've learned so much more from him than I think he has learned from me.

If you have the personality that can accept your Dom/Master will make mistakes, some of which may be directly related to his age, then you should be fine. Many people cannot live this kind of acceptance, especially with a Dom/Master, and I understand that. It hasn't been a problem for us, though, for which I am thrilled. We also have the support of all of his family and mine, which is a tremendous asset. I would be much more concerned over family disapproval and interference than over age, as I have found that to be much more destructive to a relationship from my own experience.

Respectfully,

Amy

(in reply to labrat18610)

RE: Younger Owners - 10/17/2007 1:05:32 AM

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Thorns is 13 years younger than i am. I would say we have no issue with this.

Happy Wednesday!!

~smilezz~

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(in reply to peterK50)

RE: Younger Owners - 10/17/2007 9:49:32 AM

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Joined: 10/11/2007
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I am 31 years old and still get ridiculed for age. I have been a Dom since I was 20. If you have a ginuine connection with some one, ago should simply be a number

(in reply to peterK50)

RE: Younger Owners - 10/17/2007 11:29:11 AM

Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MadameRussia

I am 31 years old and still get ridiculed for age. I have been a Dom since I was 20. If you have a ginuine connection with some one, ago should simply be a number

Age is just not a number. Certainly if you mean you have a compatibility on all siginificant levels for two people sure but a strong connection to me is not the same. I am not saying age difference is always problematic either but if you want to get into a significant relationship with someone who is significantly older or younger then you ignoring obvious differences that age in fact cause and that is a recipe for disaster.

My former Master was twenty-seven years older then me. I met him when I was twenty-three. The differences are there. It is about compatibility. Most of the issues you can discuss about the age factor can be dismissed into they are factors in all relationships but the fact is most people have common life stages and maturity paths. These stages and paths are multi faceted and not an either or situation. Energy levels, expectations, what is relaxing, who and how we socialize, commitment to pursuing a career to quality of life and a bunch of other things are important factors that are quite commonly different amongst people with significant age differences. For example at parties I was way more comfortable and enjoyable to talk to our friends children then the friends. No big deal to me. It though was a big deal that he turned himself off from being open to life while I was still very much into exploring it. For some people most or all are no big deal and that is great but to write or think there are not issues and some might very well be significant things to overcome is not realistic.

Age is very much like using labels. It sounds not cool and no one wants themselves defined by them but they have their purposes. If a person judges in absolute solely on age that is shame on them. To think that there are no differences in life stages and different types of maturity which age more often then not plays an important factor is also poorly thought out.

_____________________________

I am sorry I do not fit Webster's defintion of a slave but thankfully my Master is not Webster.

"Anything that contradicts experience and logic should be abandoned." - H.H. The 14th Dalai Lama

(in reply to MadameRussia)

RE: Younger Owners - 10/17/2007 11:47:55 AM

Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: labrat18610

People age. What you thought was cool at 21, sucks when your 42. When there's a big age difference, the relationship is a temporary one. Yeah, I know somebody is going to post that even with a huge age difference, "we've been together for eons". That only means one of you hasn't grown up, yet.
Rick

Thanks, Rick, for showing us that just because someone is old, doesn't mean their wise and that just because one is gay, doesn't mean they can't be cynical.

_____________________________

If you love somebody, you have to be willing to break them.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.

Have you slapped your slave today?

(in reply to labrat18610)

RE: Younger Owners - 10/17/2007 3:52:30 PM

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Joined: 2/17/2005
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Now i have not read all the answers but he is my 0.02 cents. I personally perfer older men it is just somrthing i like. Now i see nothing wrong in submitting to a younger man if that is what you want and it makes you happy. You should just make sure you have more in common that BDSM though. Master is a fair bit older than me but we have many of the same interests ans talk about everything under the sun. It is always good to have other common interests.

Matt's littleone

(in reply to peterK50)

RE: Younger Owners - 10/17/2007 5:02:34 PM

Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
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After some deep and mysterious thought, I think the issue that makes older/younger work is what environment both were brought up in. If the younger had older than average parents, they might better understand where the “older” party was coming from and possibly just feel more comfortable with an older partner.

Another exercise for you to consider.. if you are say 28.. think back on how much you have changed over the past 10 years since you graduated high school. You may understand the high school mindset- but does it still really interest you? Now at 35, think of how you were 15.. then 20 years. What did you have to learn on your own? How many meaningful relationships did you have where you took responsibility for the other person?

_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.

(in reply to peterK50)

RE: Younger Owners - 10/17/2007 6:29:49 PM

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Joined: 8/8/2007
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I'm 44, my Domme is 30, we have absolutely no issues with my submitting to Her. Only thing we sometimes have “issues” with is pop culture during our respective childhood or adolescence. I'll mention some song that was popular when I graduated from high school, and She'll remind me She was barely in elementary school. Serves more for a laugh between us than anything.

(in reply to peterK50)

RE: Younger Owners - 10/17/2007 11:19:08 PM

Posts: 147
Joined: 1/12/2007
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I think age is just a number after 21. Its all relative to what you and yours feel. If you have a problem with it then its obviously an issue the fact that you have to ask someone other than your owner about this kind of implies that its an issue for you. There are so many other factors that are involved in a relationship other than age. You should think about it and you should talk about it with your owner. If its not a problem for either of you then who cares what other people think. Its the two of you who have to be happy and satisfied in your relationship. Be a little introspective and the answer will come to you.
Good luck

(in reply to Estring)

RE: Younger Owners - 10/17/2007 11:40:49 PM

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Joined: 7/18/2006
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.

< Message edited by Juliun16 -- 10/17/2007 11:42:25 PM >

(in reply to cameramaster)

RE: Younger Owners - 10/17/2007 11:46:37 PM

PassionateTulip

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Joined: 5/15/2007
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A dildo can go in any hole of my boy I choose to put it in (mouth or bum). With a girl it can go in front back or mouth. Breathplay isn't really an interest of mine but I know enough to explain the general concept to someone. So I guess you could say I knew more than you did at that age, and heck, even younger. My bound pet is easy to read, even when he decides to try and be difficult. Just because you may have just learned your abc's and 123's or not gotten that far at that age doesn't mean others did not pay attention as they grew. You also must remember that the younger generations have had far more means of access to information than the older ones did. When I was 12 I had the internet in my room. Somehow I doubt you can say the same. Everyone has their own path, their own journey. Age is merely a number, a measurment of time. It is what we do with that time which gives our age any sort of meaning. The only information which one truly needs at any stage of life or play is that "No matter how much experience you have you may not always be prepared for what is to come."

PT

quote:

ORIGINAL: cameramaster

Older, younger... is in the perspective.

I do feel there is a cutoff.
21 year old as a Dom?? I would imagine it would be difficult for an older person to submit to someone who has little expierience in real life.

Veses if the Dom was 31 and the sub was .. say 45... That 10 year differnce in age for the Dom is huge!!
Think about it. At 21, what the heck did you know about Breathplay or reading the emotions of a bound person?? Let alone what hole the dildo goes in??

(in reply to cameramaster)

RE: Younger Owners - 10/18/2007 1:45:29 AM

Posts: 3572
Joined: 1/23/2007
From: London, Ontario
Status: offline

quote:

i cannot see myself submitting to a "Teen Daddy" dom who is 10 or more junior to me ...a Daddy type to me is someone who is a little older than i am.

lol ditto.

3 of my girls are done university, how embarassing if the guy is younger and less educated than my own offspring. How can a kid be man enough to dom me? laffs, it wouldn't happen. With age comes refinement, life experience and common interests. I shouldn't have to introduce and explain to a guy who the Beatles were. I'm not going to the liquor store for someone who wants to name himself a dominant lol.

I am done being a mamma, wiping dribble and packing lunches n juice boxes into paper bags.

(in reply to PassionateTulip)

RE: Younger Owners - 10/18/2007 6:15:00 AM

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Joined: 1/5/2005
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quote:

With age comes refinement

Ironic that you are your own contradiction.

_____________________________

If you love somebody, you have to be willing to break them.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.

Have you slapped your slave today?

(in reply to came4U)

RE: Younger Owners - 10/18/2007 6:56:36 AM

Posts: 3572
Joined: 1/23/2007
From: London, Ontario
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quote:

Ironic that you are your own contradiction.

Ironic that you don't know me from jack nor is it your place to care since I have no interest in your life details.

I am refined to the point that I see your petty comment is well,...weakness.

edit: ouch, I see your age is only 30. No need to feel personally rejected that I have no need for a young fella. My comment was based on 'hypothetical' guy, in the scheme of things.

< Message edited by came4U -- 10/18/2007 7:00:50 AM >

(in reply to MrDiscipline44)

RE: Younger Owners - 10/18/2007 7:27:02 AM

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Joined: 1/5/2005
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Interesting that the simple truth of a statement has once again made you so defensive as that you have to lash out. You only further prove the point that you are a contradiction to your own statement and that just because you're old, doesn't mean you're mature. Thanks.

_____________________________

If you love somebody, you have to be willing to break them.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.

Have you slapped your slave today?

(in reply to came4U)

RE: Younger Owners - 10/18/2007 7:38:01 AM

Posts: 3572
Joined: 1/23/2007
From: London, Ontario
Status: offline

quote:

Interesting that the simple truth of a statement has once again made you so defensive as that you have to lash out. You only further prove the point that you are a contradiction to your own statement and that just because you're old, doesn't mean you're mature. Thanks.

It isn't lashing out kid. It is not defensive as much as it is just putting you in your place for being personally rude to me.

I am not that old, lad. Mature? sometimes, if I feel like it. When you decide to pay my extrav. shoe bills then you have authority to convince me of your 'younger man' should be for everyone policy.

If I don't want a young thing in my life, I mean it. If you have a problem with that then I suggest you worry about bigger and better things.

(in reply to MrDiscipline44)

RE: Younger Owners - 10/18/2007 7:43:35 AM

Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
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When I search it's always for younger. I just find younger men to be more attractive than older. Younger doesn't equate to being unintelligent. Plus there's the hottness factor of submitting to someone younger especially when they call me girl and I'm ten years older than them.

(in reply to peterK50)

RE: Younger Owners - 10/18/2007 8:00:21 AM

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Joined: 6/22/2004
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"Girl"????

They call you "girl"????

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen68

Plus there's the hottness factor of submitting to someone younger especially when they call me girl and I'm ten years older than them.

(in reply to Aileen68)

RE: Younger Owners - 10/18/2007 8:01:36 AM

Posts: 5746
Joined: 7/11/2007
From: Austin Texas
Status: offline

For me it is older men, I have always been attracted to a man older than myself. I think they are yummmmmmy

.

This is my opinion only:
It's funny but the age gap does make a difference to me. If I were 18 with a 40 year old man there would not be a whole lot in common. But once the youngest person is over 30 then the mental gap grows much smaller. Both now are adults and have lived a good part of adult life.

A 20 year difference in age can be enormous when one is 20 and the other 40. It is not so different when one is 40 and one is 60. Not neccessarily an issue of emotional maturity, simply an issue of life experience. Knowing what it is like to have to be an adult with rent, possible UMs, knowing about life insurance (hah), having gone through career changes.

Yes a 25 year old can fit those, but there is a seperation between being independent for 8 years and being independent for 20.

_____________________________

~Love your life! (It is the only one you'll get).

(in reply to Aileen68)

RE: Younger Owners - 10/18/2007 8:06:28 AM

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Joined: 8/7/2005
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If it works, it works. Why worry about it? People who say it can't work because of this, that, or the other thing, are simply being closed minded. Sure, a large age difference MAY present some issues that make a long-term relationship more difficult, but it's not a certainty. If people click, they click. Individuals don't always fit the mold, so we shouldn't pre-judge based on factors like age.

Personally, I would LOVE to be dominated by a much younger woman.

< Message edited by hardbodysub -- 10/18/2007 8:07:36 AM >

(in reply to peterK50)

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