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Why are we into BDSM? - 10/16/2007 8:54:36 PM

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One of the questions I've always wondered is why I love to be dominated. I'm only into the D part of BDSM. Some of you are into the really heavy stuff. And you thoroughly enjoy it. Yup, there's the sex angle. I get an immediate erection when obeying a Master. But there's got to be something more to it. Even though I'm only into the D part, this feels so right. Why?
As for my other "life", I'm a dominant SOB. I have to be, because that's my job. Yet, since I was a toddler I craved to be submissive.
I can remember as a four year old playing 'horsey'. I'll give you three guesses to who was always the horse. Why?
And no, I didn't have poor potty training. nor was I abused, etc.
On the other side of the equation are Masters. It's hard being a slave without a Master. Why do we fit so well together.
Why are we into BDSM?
Rick

RE: Why are we into BDSM? - 10/16/2007 9:04:09 PM

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Why do homosexuals fit well with other homosexuals?

I'm into kinky stuff because it interests and fulfills me to be into them- the same as I am into movies and tv and costumes.

I'm into authority based relationship dynamics because it fulfills me- the same as I am bisexual.

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(in reply to labrat18610)

RE: Why are we into BDSM? - 10/17/2007 6:18:31 AM

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the question should be why isnt everyone into it ..
personally i love not knowing what comes next .. the feel of Masters hands controling me .. his voice
making me tremble .. yup life needs bdsm :}

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

RE: Why are we into BDSM? - 10/17/2007 8:34:54 AM

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Why am I into BDSM? The best way I can explain is thus:
it's the sexual aspect, I feel whole and complete, being primarily submissive is who I am, it's the kink factor, it's the added dimension to my life, it's the thrill of being under someone else's control, it is all of this and yet it is only some of this.

Unfortunately I am not able to define specifically why, the equation is complex and all I know for sure that BDSM is part of totality of who I am as a person.

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(in reply to labrat18610)

RE: Why are we into BDSM? - 10/17/2007 8:48:48 AM

RRafe

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It feels good.

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RE: Why are we into BDSM? - 10/17/2007 9:08:22 AM

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I believe we're into it because we have a brain and a personality and we detest boredom.personlity determines our bent,(psychologists can argue nature v. nurture 'til hell freezes over) we know ourselves and what we need for the fulfilment of our brain's imagination, and our desire to take a good thing and make it better our way...

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RE: Why are we into BDSM? - 10/17/2007 9:34:19 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: gentlestarZR

the question should be why isnt everyone into it ..
personally i love not knowing what comes next .. the feel of Masters hands controling me .. his voice
making me tremble .. yup life needs bdsm :}

Yup, star you said it better than i could have in fewer words so i wont bother but with an:

Agreed

~meticulous~

(in reply to gentlestarZR)

RE: Why are we into BDSM? - 10/17/2007 10:03:51 AM

kirii

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quote:

ORIGINAL: labrat18610

One of the questions I've always wondered is why I love to be dominated. I'm only into the D part of BDSM. Some of you are into the really heavy stuff. And you thoroughly enjoy it. Yup, there's the sex angle. I get an immediate erection when obeying a Master. But there's got to be something more to it. Even though I'm only into the D part, this feels so right. Why?
As for my other "life", I'm a dominant SOB. I have to be, because that's my job. Yet, since I was a toddler I craved to be submissive.
I can remember as a four year old playing 'horsey'. I'll give you three guesses to who was always the horse. Why?
And no, I didn't have poor potty training. nor was I abused, etc.
On the other side of the equation are Masters. It's hard being a slave without a Master. Why do we fit so well together.
Why are we into BDSM?
Rick

For myself, I am ‘into’ BDSM simply because I am a masochist and it feeds my cravings for pain. No other reason.

(in reply to labrat18610)

RE: Why are we into BDSM? - 10/17/2007 10:52:07 AM

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For me it is the ability to give up control of myself to another that I trust with my being. It is not just the kinks it is simply letting go of the control and handing it to another. Like you I have to be in control every moment of my nilla life, giving up that control even for a short period feels so good.

Milady h

(in reply to labrat18610)

RE: Why are we into BDSM? - 10/17/2007 11:02:12 AM

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I think of it like this. Some people like books, sports, politics, art, etc.. Some people like short mates, tall ones, etc... I have just come to the conclusion it is part of my personality, who I am and what I like, the same way I like art or watching crime dramas.

(in reply to kirii)

RE: Why are we into BDSM? - 10/17/2007 11:17:34 AM

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Because we want a little bit of something extra and special in our lives

(in reply to Shantilucious)

RE: Why are we into BDSM? - 10/17/2007 11:22:40 AM

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I can not say why slaves are slaves, but I am thankful for them every day. I am a Master, without slaves i'm just a pervert. I crave the control and enjoy it completely, sex is actually a very small part of it. although sex is used, as is nudity, pain, and humiliation, it is about the contol or in the case of a slave giving up that control. Being made to do things a slave wouldn't ordinarily do, such as bi-sex, is a big turn on for some. People often dream of doing something but would never do it unless made to. If a slave is under the control of a Master, the choice is taken away and they can do whatever they wish without guilt. Then again, we are all perverted in one way or another and it could just be fun. Master Robert

(in reply to Shantilucious)

RE: Why are we into BDSM? - 10/17/2007 11:37:24 AM

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For the sheer extasy of relief. Kink has no part at all. Kink in basic priciple leans towards too much forethought and preparation and would become dull, repetative. If I had to plan and primp for an expected situation, it would be compliance based on preparation based activity. That, in itself, wouldn't seem like a natural flow of reactions out of seeing (in action) pure and genuine Mastering skills. The whole idea of not knowing and not asking would be fulfilling. Just being at ease knowing (no matter how unpredictable) that a Master is choosing proper methods with excellent time-judgements for the appropriate situation.

Why am I into it? Some choose to be leaders, some choose to follow. I choose to only follow someone capable of leading.

(in reply to piperpilot)

RE: Why are we into BDSM? - 10/17/2007 12:13:14 PM

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Because the hidden lesson that can be found though BDSM help me and mine navigate the paths of Mastery and slavery.

Trust is learned/earned when you take someone to the brink of their capabilities and back safely.

Living in the exact moment in time is learned when playing with SM because the pain for the bottom and the focus for the top make it impossible to be anywhere but in that moment.

Because the idea of where our limits are in our own heads is all so often nowhere near as far as what our mind and body will actually allow us to do.

There are more hidden lessons that SM can be a useful tool to teach and learn.

Then there is the whole psyco sexual aspects, of what makes us hot sexually.

(in reply to came4U)

RE: Why are we into BDSM? - 10/17/2007 12:19:41 PM

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It's always been hard for me to write or type why I am into BDSM because BDSM is much more than physical at least to me. But I can try to sum it up.

The connections
The friendships
The community
The kink
The sexual satisification
The power exchange
The toys
and occasionally even the politics.

And I've found some great places to eat via attending munches nationally. You gotta love that!

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RE: Why are we into BDSM? - 10/17/2007 12:29:55 PM

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A few reasons...
The mental aspect. Being inside a woman's mind and knowing her better than she knows herself.
The level of trust and intimacy that a BDSM relationship creates.
Control. I really enjoy the feeling of power. Knowing I have a submissive who will obey without hesitation. One that I can and do use in any and every way I desire.
Of course...The sex is incredible too!
Not a complete list, but a few reasons off the top of My head.

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(in reply to Archer)

RE: Why are we into BDSM? - 10/17/2007 12:38:02 PM

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I love pleasing people in general it has always been this way I seek praise
So if I' am pleasing to you it is abig turn on for me knowing the I've done something to bring
joy or happiness to your life you joy is mind > The Dominant who chooose's me will be satisfied
Of course compatibilitie is a big concern

(in reply to Cuffkinks)

RE: Why are we into BDSM? - 10/17/2007 12:40:46 PM

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Cause the BDSM community is the only place where I can find people willing to tie me up and cause pain during sex..anytime I mention it to some guy I meet at a vanilla bar they think Im weird.....

besides...there are hawt guys here......

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Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good.
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RE: Why are we into BDSM? - 10/17/2007 2:38:38 PM

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Thanks for all the replies. Generally, most stated that the liked BDSM. Yet, there was a sense that BDSM was some what abnormal. I know that I got strange looks when friends found out that I was a grovelling slave to another guy. But, I was happy as hell.
My question is why. Is this something we were born with? Or is it some other factor?
I was born gay. Contrary to some religious thought, I did not chose to be gay. Nor did I chose to be so frikken submissive. And the men, who were my Masters, seemed to have been born with a natural sense of entitlement- my counterparts. Again, why do we gravitate to it and enjoy it so much. I don't think there is a "vanilla" form of BDSM.
Maybe we all have a range of BDSM built into us??????

(in reply to GhitaAmati)

RE: Why are we into BDSM? - 10/17/2007 2:50:39 PM

RRafe

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quote:

ORIGINAL: labrat18610

Thanks for all the replies. Generally, most stated that the liked BDSM. Yet, there was a sense that BDSM was some what abnormal. I know that I got strange looks when friends found out that I was a grovelling slave to another guy. But, I was happy as hell.
My question is why. Is this something we were born with? Or is it some other factor?
I was born gay. Contrary to some religious thought, I did not chose to be gay. Nor did I chose to be so frikken submissive. And the men, who were my Masters, seemed to have been born with a natural sense of entitlement- my counterparts. Again, why do we gravitate to it and enjoy it so much. I don't think there is a "vanilla" form of BDSM.
Maybe we all have a range of BDSM built into us??????

I just blame it on my blood. Celtic / Nordic mix.

I'm about as submissive as a Mack Truck.

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to labrat18610)

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