SunnyTawse
Posts: 151
Joined: 11/17/2004 Status: offline
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Interesting--and fun!--series of responses. .. y'all are really quite witty! I'd like to make a couple of comments, one of which might be just a tad bit controvesial... so I'll just toss that one out first, I guess... This is also just a peripheral issue, but I'll mention it anyway; it concerns the phrase/concept of a sub pulling the Dom/me's chain. I expect a submissive to try pulling my chain once in a while--not that I want them to, but I'm not surprised if they do. I don't think it's something a dominant should get too worked up about. Because one responsibility of the submissive is to be open, expressive, spontaneous--ie., trusting and emotionally transparent--to their dominant, in some ways, we are asking them to be child-like. Not childish, but child-like. I don't think it's all that unusual for a submissive to give voice to many parts of that side of themselves, including behavior that is intended to evoke a response from the dominant. Sometimes it can be manipulative, but often it's less calculated than that. Any dominant worth their salt should be able to take such behavior in stride. I think our subs count on us, on a rather deep level, to take the high road, to be more or less unflappable... and I think we should make every effort to live up to that. You didn't say, but if this person who accused you of "pulling Doms chains" was a Dom/me, I'd say they have some things to learn yet. I'm not sure, though, that the accusation and your behavior (from what I can determine) are really the same thing. I agree with pretty much everyone here that subs should always be able to speak their minds. I also agree that they should be respectful and should attempt to be tactful when they can. Like any friend or partner, it behooves us all to be supportive in a way that helps build up our friends and partners in others' eyes rather than tears them down. I'm always very uncomfortable around couples who "kid" each other in an unkind way or speak poorly of each other in front of others. I know some of this veers off a bit from the original question. Thanks for the opportunity to say a few things that in other circumstances I might think need to be said but often wouldn't feel comfortable saying. Sunny Tawse Sadien Domina Are you going to come quietly, or will I need earplugs? -- MW of TIES
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