Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Who has influenced you the most?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Who has influenced you the most? Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Who has influenced you the most? - 11/10/2007 5:53:12 AM   
MissSCD


Posts: 1185
Joined: 3/10/2007
Status: offline 		Greetings:
 
I happened to make contact with my former Mentor/Master last evening.  I recall talking with him for hours about the lifestyle when I began my journey. In the beginning, I tought I was a submissive, but found out I was Domme. 
We lost contact for a few months, and I  missed him terribly.  Some how I was able to sign into my old account on MSN and contact him.
I was so lost without not being able to talk to him.  He is a great friend.  Now we will stay in touch.
My question to you as a web site is who influenced your journey from the beginning of your quest of this lifestyle?  He taught me a lot.  He and my slave have taught me a lot about style and technique.
You all have a wonderful day.
 
Regards, MissSCD
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Who has influenced you the most? - 11/10/2007 5:58:45 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		Every submissive and slave that I have ever known, been friends with, and/or had contact with. Because, I didn't need any help understanding how my brain worked. For the life of me, I could not understand how or why, someone would want to be on the flip side of all of this. It made zero sense to me. I could not understand how serving and submitting, to my bossy selfish interests, could be satisfying to a woman. I struggled with it for a long time.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to MissSCD)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Who has influenced you the most? - 11/10/2007 6:05:57 AM   
dawntreader


Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline 		i agree with LaTigresse, everyone i have come in contact with has been influencial to me, good and bad. However, to give credit where credit is due - i have to go back to the beautiful 24 year old that introduced me to D/s a mere year and a half ago. Without him, i am not sure i would have ever explored this side of myself and i will always be grateful to him~
                   j

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to MissSCD)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Who has influenced you the most? - 11/10/2007 6:33:04 AM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		I would have to say that at the beginning of my journey the person that most influenced me would be my first dominant. I was afraid of the idea of being "dommed" before him although the concept was a turn on at the same time.

We were friends through political activism groups and chat online for quite a while before we went into any private conversations. I knew he was compassionate and passionate before this topic of conversation ever had a chance to arise between us. So when he stated that he was a dominant, I was not afraid of that. I suppose it opened me up to the idea of romantic D/s and of loving affectionate sadomasochism. Even though I was very hurt by the ending of that relationship, and he could have ended it on a better note, we were able to come to a resolution in the end that was not bitter.

I am grateful for the experiences I had with him, he showed me my submissive nature, and without that experience I doubt I would have ever sought a dominant the way I did eventually, and I would never have met my Daddy... all things have a reason and a season.

Edited to add, this was not an internet only relationship.... just clarifying


< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 11/10/2007 6:35:52 AM >

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to MissSCD)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Who has influenced you the most? - 11/10/2007 6:57:38 AM   
bipolarber


Posts: 2792
Joined: 9/25/2004
Status: offline 		That's a little like asking a cake which parts of it make it a cake... Was the eggs? The flour? The fruit filling? Was it the icing? When I think back to my early days inthe scene, and how I immersed myself with everything I could find: books, munches, parties, formal "class-style" demos... I could never point to one thing, one person whom I can say was the major influence on me.

I will say that Pat Califia probably gave me the best information about the reality of BDSM... and that my first dominant, Dorathy, set the pace... but then there was Midori, and Molly Devon, and... and.. and... (you get the idea)

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Who has influenced you the most? - 11/10/2007 7:02:37 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		Ironically.. the person that influenced me the most is the one that contributed to the most negative of my experiences of my life.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to MissSCD)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Who has influenced you the most? - 11/10/2007 7:11:13 AM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline 		No one influenced me from the beginning.

But since meeting and getting to know Jack Rinella and his slave Patrick I can say that they have become one model of how well I hope we can manage our kinky family.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to MissSCD)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Who has influenced you the most? - 11/10/2007 7:14:24 AM   
LATEXBABY64


Posts: 2107
Joined: 4/8/2004
Status: offline 		the Donald, babe ruth. Steve jobs. Bill Gates. Rupert merdock. james cagney,  yep and more hard to put finger on one

(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Who has influenced you the most? - 11/10/2007 8:09:01 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Mistress Vixen, Henrietta, Charlotte, Flagg, SirC, Raven Kaldera and jonathon, and all the years of discussion in the DomSub yahoogroup that the idiotic SirWithLove started were the memorable names who influenced me most back when I started.

< Message edited by LuckyAlbatross -- 11/10/2007 8:41:59 AM >

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to LATEXBABY64)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Who has influenced you the most? - 11/10/2007 8:09:09 AM   
slavegirljoy


Posts: 1207
Joined: 11/6/2006
From: North Carolina, USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MissSCD
My question to you as a web site is who influenced your journey from the beginning of your quest of this lifestyle?
 
Regards, MissSCD

The beginning of my quest in this style of life started with my family, especially my father.  If i had been raised in a different family, i doubt i would have turned out so submissive, or to be so sexually aroused by being whipped with a leather belt on my naked bottom or wanting to be disciplined or wanting to be told what to do or, etc., etc. 
 
The family dynamics i was raised with set in motion everything that was to follow.  After that, i attracted, and was attracted to, men who liked being in a position of power and liked to use that power to control me in a sexually intimate relationship. 

The first man that i experienced BDSM with, my ex-husband, was the most influential in my learning about my masochistic sexuality, in teaching me about kinky sex and in helping me to realize my need to be in a power-based, kinky, intimate relationship. 
 
With him, i was able to learn to express and enjoy my kinky desires.  i was still young enough to be very impressionable and i was eager to experiment with all kinds of sex and discover what got me excited and what didn't.  Every relationship since then has helped me to further my exploration but, always from the point of reference that was established in that first kink-based relationship.
 
slave joy
Owned property of Master David

(in reply to MissSCD)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Who has influenced you the most? - 11/10/2007 8:13:38 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline 		My late husband was the guiding force in my life; even after his death I still use things he taught me to this day.

There have been others through the years who influenced me in small ways; but only as a means of challenging what I already knew or felt.

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to MissSCD)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Who has influenced you the most? - 11/10/2007 8:17:34 AM   
Rockbound


Posts: 25
Joined: 10/6/2006
Status: offline 		The many thoughtful posters on the old alt.sex.bondage board who presented their expertise and offered encouragement to those who once thought their BDSM fantasies were theirs alone. They showed many of us that our thoughts and fantasies were not unique, that there are many others out there thinking about the same things, and actually doing something about it.

That old Usenet forum was a great learning experience for several years before the spammers destroyed it. The pioneers who posted innumerable helpful, informative and encouraging comments, articles, and stories had a huge influence in expanding the BDSM community.

(in reply to slavegirljoy)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Who has influenced you the most? - 11/10/2007 8:33:28 AM   
SingleRarity


Posts: 320
Joined: 9/13/2006
Status: offline 		My Daddy has definitely been the strongest influence on my kink tendencies, but if I were to look outside of the relationship, I would have to go with our friends in the Chicago scene, followed closely by Damon Pierce and Claire Adams.  I met them last weekend and simply watching the two of them react to one another is quite stunning.  Her devotion to him is so clear, and they know one another so well, that often words aren't needed.  Plus Claire is insanely sexy, and she actually came over and laid on top of me to help me get a better stretch.  That was in a stretching class, btw.  I'm also pretty bendy, and after watching Damon suspend Claire in some insane suspensions that utilize her extreme flexibility, I've become much more inspired, as has Daddy.  I really need to get back into ballet. 

(in reply to slavegirljoy)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Who has influenced you the most? - 11/10/2007 2:20:40 PM   
Padriag


Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline 		No one... there have been no mentors, no individual(s) who heavily influenced me.  Like some others, I have been influenced to one degree or another by almost everyone I've encountered... even the morons who annoyed me.  You live and you learn.

_____________________________

Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

(in reply to MissSCD)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Who has influenced you the most? - 11/10/2007 2:30:42 PM   
kyraofMists


Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		My Lord has influenced me the most.  His honor and integrity have inspired me from the beginning.  His devotion and passion have moved me to tears.  His commitment to family and those he loves makes me feel safe and comforted.  His sadism sends chills down my spine; makes me shiver in fear and anticipation.  I couldn't imagine my life without him.

Outside of the lifestyle, my former therapist has influenced me the most.  He taught me that changing feelings was possible by changing behaviors and thoughts.  His influence saved my life.  My Lord makes sure I remember those lessons and it has enriched my life beyond measure.

Knight's Kyra

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to MissSCD)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Who has influenced you the most? - 11/10/2007 7:35:22 PM   
wisteriaV


Posts: 438
Joined: 3/17/2005
Status: offline 		I actually thought about this one.  The one singular person that had/has made an empact is oddly enough my mom who will be 90 this coming February. She has me when she was 45 and this March I will be 45..I was born one week after she turned 45...She is my rock and my inspiration. She taught me to believe in myself and not compromise in anything.

_____________________________

Every story has two sides , much like a coin and neither one is totally perfect.
If it doesn't float your boat, then don't get in the water~!

(in reply to kyraofMists)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Who has influenced you the most? - 11/10/2007 7:42:59 PM   
laurell3


Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

Ironically.. the person that influenced me the most is the one that contributed to the most negative of my experiences of my life.


Yeah me too, I learned so much about myself and my needs from a few very caring, talented Doms, but what made me pull my head out the clouds and stand on my feet and move in a forward direction of my own choosing was my foolish mistakes with some harmful characters early in the lifestyle. 

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Who has influenced you the most? - 11/10/2007 7:50:00 PM   
marieToo


Posts: 3595
Joined: 5/21/2006
From: Jersey
Status: offline 		For me it was a man I was involved with several years ago, and about half way into my ds experiences.  The relationship didn't last very long and my experience with him oddly was a negative one, but through my interactions and time spent with him, I found the deeper core of my submission and realized that my previous experiences had only scratched the surface.  After that relationship ended, I went away knowing exactly who I was and exactly where I belonged in all of this.
The relationship ended on a very bad note.  So, like KoM, the worst experience influenced me the most.

< Message edited by marieToo -- 11/10/2007 7:51:33 PM >

_____________________________

marie.


I give good agita.









(in reply to wisteriaV)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Who has influenced you the most? - 11/11/2007 9:26:06 AM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline 		Aaran (who was really Pete), Anni, Beard, Chris, Colin, Connor, David, Dennis, Di, Dianne, Eleanor, Esther, Foxy, Frances, Francesca, Fran aka Luke, Hayley; Idelette, Jamie, Jason, Jay, John, Jonathon, Joop, Lu, Mayada, Meg, Max, Paul, Paul, Peter, Rachel, Robert, Ron, Roy, Simone, Stefan, Vince, Winnie and William and at least 1,000 who shall remain confidential..






















































(in reply to MissSCD)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Who has influenced you the most? - 11/11/2007 9:37:07 AM   
Faramir


Posts: 1043
Joined: 2/12/2005
Status: offline 		I wouldn't use the term "quest" as I understand it--I haven't been searching for an elixir to return with, so to speak.  I suppose I might use journey, in the sense that I (hope I) have moved from a state of less self-knowledge to greater self-knowledge. 

If I had to name an outside, persuasive influence in that process, I'd point to C.S. Lewis, in an ethical, philosophical sense.  However, Lewis remained tortured and in tension over the course of his life in his BDSM orientation.  Reading through his process of repudiating his sexuality helped me decide how mine could be ethical and virtuous.

_____________________________

True masters, true subs and slaves, X many years in the lifestyle, Old Guard this and High Protocol that--it's like a convention of D&D nerds were allowed to have sex once, and they decided to make a religion out of it.

(in reply to Prinsexx)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Who has influenced you the most? Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094