RE: Why are we all so quick to judge?

Join Our Community

Collarchat.com

Home Login Search

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> RE: Why are we all so quick to judge?

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3] 4 next > >>

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge? - 11/12/2007 6:36:15 AM

camille65

Posts: 5746
Joined: 7/11/2007
From: Austin Texas
Status: offline

IMO there is a difference between being judgemental and being nasty.

_____________________________

~Love your life! (It is the only one you'll get).

(in reply to chellekitty)

Profile

Post #: 41

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge? - 11/12/2007 6:38:24 AM

downkitty

Posts: 224
Joined: 10/1/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65

This truly is to no one in particular. Something I find amusing *in a kind of bad way* is how people defend their nastiness by saying others have too thin a skin. Or, that it is simply the way they are and have no intention of changing. Or saying it can't be rude if it is just their opinion. The one that makes me shake my head in dismay the most would have to be 'but that's just me' with the implication that anyone not having that view doesn't meet the standard. I will never understand how someone can take pride in and brag about being a bitch. Being a strong woman yes oh yes but not a bitch.

I've always viewed "but that's just me" as a way of saying IMO, IMNSHO, YMMV, and so on. I've never read anything else into it.

Respectfully,

Amy

P.S. I have used the "thin skin" bit more than once, but I am considerate of other people's feelings. Some people really are supersensitive and read way too much into things. I stand by my opinion that this lifestyle or kink is not for the feint of heart.

_____________________________

"What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls a butterfly." R. Bach in "Illusions"

(in reply to camille65)

Profile

Post #: 42

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge? - 11/12/2007 6:43:57 AM

sambamanslilgirl

Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline

being a bitch isn't that bad however it takes a thick skin to handle it

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...

...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to camille65)

Profile

Post #: 43

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge? - 11/12/2007 6:54:15 AM

camille65

Posts: 5746
Joined: 7/11/2007
From: Austin Texas
Status: offline

Sort of like how you handled it by putting it all in your siggy line? I do not mean that in a snarky way, but if you could handle it.. then you wouldn't be making a point of keeping that in your sig line. Weird how I stated that my post was not directed to anyone in particular yet folks are getting defensive. We are all anonymous here. For some that means they get to say things they never would say to someones face. I don't work that way and it isn't because my skin is too thin.

_____________________________

~Love your life! (It is the only one you'll get).

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)

Profile

Post #: 44

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge? - 11/12/2007 6:57:17 AM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65

IMO there is a difference between being judgemental and being nasty.

Yes, "judgmental" is what I am when I do not agree with the way people live their lives..... "nasty" is what other people are when they do not agree with how I live mine

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to camille65)

Profile

Post #: 45

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge? - 11/12/2007 7:00:47 AM

sambamanslilgirl

Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65

Sort of like how you handled it by putting it all in your siggy line? I do not mean that in a snarky way, but if you could handle it.. then you wouldn't be making a point of keeping that in your sig line.

because it seems there are others who feel i am an insensitive, opinionated, prudish, churchgoing bitch and have actually called me out publicly numerous times on different threads. and why not put it in a sig line? am i offending you in some way?

quote:

Weird how I stated that my post was not directed to anyone in particular yet folks are getting defensive.

usually it is since it's an oxymoronic phrase

quote:

We are all anonymous here. For some that means they get to say things they never would say to someones face. I don't work that way and it isn't because my skin is too thin.

whatever or however i respond on the forums is how i would say it in someone's face. i don't pretend.

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...

...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to camille65)

Profile

Post #: 46

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge? - 11/12/2007 7:30:08 AM

Vanatru

Posts: 300
Joined: 4/16/2004
Status: offline

Oh brother

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)

Profile

Post #: 47

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge? - 11/12/2007 7:40:02 AM

chellekitty

Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65

IMO there is a difference between being judgemental and being nasty.

Yes, "judgmental" is what I am when I do not agree with the way people live their lives..... "nasty" is what other people are when they do not agree with how I live mine

_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to juliaoceania)

Profile

Post #: 48

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge? - 11/12/2007 7:42:09 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

~fr~
Why is it bad to judge? Or to make judgments? Isn't that part of the thinking and decision-making process? Is it only bad if people say bad things or disagree? Is it only good if it's a group hug and agreement?

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to chellekitty)

Profile

Post #: 49

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge? - 11/12/2007 7:57:30 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65

This truly is to no one in particular. Something I find amusing *in a kind of bad way* is how people defend their nastiness by saying others have too thin a skin. Or, that it is simply the way they are and have no intention of changing. Or saying it can't be rude if it is just their opinion. The one that makes me shake my head in dismay the most would have to be 'but that's just me' with the implication that anyone not having that view doesn't meet the standard. I will never understand how someone can take pride in and brag about being a bitch. Being a strong woman yes oh yes but not a bitch.

Camille, I am not doing this to pick on you at all, please understand that. What I am doing is to provide an example of how words can be totally misunderstood.

When you brought up your view of "but that's just me" I was honestly thinking "huh???" Because for me, if I see that, I see the intent as I would mean it. If I say, "but that's just me" I am saying it is my opinion for me and my life and lord knows I don't expect it to fit anyone else. Nothing at all in my intent to reflect that to feel, do, think, etc....otherwise would mean that someone it didn't work for, was any less of a person. Just that it doesn't work for them and it does work for me.

Example: I cannot imagine submitting to anyone, man or woman, in a relationship....but that's just me. I certainly do not look down on, or feel that someone that submits is somehow inferior. It just doesn't work for me.

Soooooooo, all of that being said. It really is too easy to be misunderstood on here to ever get upset about anything someone posts. You might be getting upset at nothing. A person can read words to mean something completely different than the person typing them, meant them.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to camille65)

Profile

Post #: 50

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge? - 11/12/2007 7:58:35 AM

Dnomyar

Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline

KatyLied. YES

(in reply to KatyLied)

Profile

Post #: 51

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge? - 11/12/2007 8:00:20 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

So more kumbaya and less disagreement. Sounds boring.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Profile

Post #: 52

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge? - 11/12/2007 8:00:26 AM

Dnomyar

Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline

Well said LaTigresse. My sentiments exactly.

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Profile

Post #: 53

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge? - 11/12/2007 8:00:59 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

So more kumbaya and less disagreement. Sounds boring.

very

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to KatyLied)

Profile

Post #: 54

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge? - 11/12/2007 8:02:17 AM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65

This truly is to no one in particular. Something I find amusing *in a kind of bad way* is how people defend their nastiness by saying others have too thin a skin. Or, that it is simply the way they are and have no intention of changing. Or saying it can't be rude if it is just their opinion. The one that makes me shake my head in dismay the most would have to be 'but that's just me' with the implication that anyone not having that view doesn't meet the standard. I will never understand how someone can take pride in and brag about being a bitch. Being a strong woman yes oh yes but not a bitch.

Camille, I am not doing this to pick on you at all, please understand that. What I am doing is to provide an example of how words can be totally misunderstood.

When you brought up your view of "but that's just me" I was honestly thinking "huh???" Because for me, if I see that, I see the intent as I would mean it. If I say, "but that's just me" I am saying it is my opinion for me and my life and lord knows I don't expect it to fit anyone else. Nothing at all in my intent to reflect that to feel, do, think, etc....otherwise would mean that someone it didn't work for, was any less of a person. Just that it doesn't work for them and it does work for me.

Example: I cannot imagine submitting to anyone, man or woman, in a relationship....but that's just me. I certainly do not look down on, or feel that someone that submits is somehow inferior. It just doesn't work for me.

Soooooooo, all of that being said. It really is too easy to be misunderstood on here to ever get upset about anything someone posts. You might be getting upset at nothing. A person can read words to mean something completely different than the person typing them, meant them.

Aw, fuck that, LT!!!!! That's just you.............

LMAO
R

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to LaTigresse)

Profile

Post #: 55

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge? - 11/12/2007 8:05:23 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

Yeahhhhhhhh?????!!! SOOO?!?!?! You wanna fight about it? Huh, huh, HUH!?!?!?? Get your gloves on buddy!

"Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee........."

(see me dancing around doing my best impersonation of Ali)

look fast before I get out of breath...........

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to mnottertail)

Profile

Post #: 56

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge? - 11/12/2007 8:16:13 AM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

for about 15 solid seconds I can give you the ass beating of your life, and, if you survive it, at second sixteen I will be begging you to kill me, because of the overall pain in my chest and body soreness.

Ron

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to LaTigresse)

Profile

Post #: 57

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge? - 11/12/2007 8:28:22 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

Oh to hell with that. I have a brand new bottle of Cockburn's Vintage port we could work on instead.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to mnottertail)

Profile

Post #: 58

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge? - 11/12/2007 8:29:57 AM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

I accept the challenge of that.......LOL. would be fun, maybe someday we will get to gether and try out a good drunk.

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to LaTigresse)

Profile

Post #: 59

RE: Why are we all so quick to judge? - 11/12/2007 10:35:00 AM

Celeste43

Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline

What you view as harsh, others may view as blunt. So who determines the call there? Additionally, if everyone only gets pats on the back and "there, there you poor thing" the person may feel momentarily better but is not actually learning anything.

Whereas telling them that since they've married and divorced five alcoholics the problem comes from why this is the type of person he/she is attracted to could be viewed as an attack, but it might be enough to get them to take a good hard look at themselves, and go off and get themselves some help.

(in reply to chellekitty)

Profile

Post #: 60