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RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? - 11/14/2007 6:20:19 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MrThorns

The BDSM scene in Arizona is pretty damned good.  There are two major pansexual organizations, APEX and Desert Dominion, Butchmann's Academy which is primarily a homosexual group, however they graciously open their doors for weekend get-togethers,training and parties, there is a lesbian's group which has a fairly good reputation as I understand it, plus there is a wide variety of smaller groups.  Most of the larger organizations play a fairly significant role in the SW Leather Conference and provide plenty of educational material, workshops and discussion/support groups in addition to proving dungeon space for weekely play parties. 

It's pretty BDSM friendly...

~Thorns

a bit off topic

Glad to see you back safely

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RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? - 11/14/2007 6:26:39 AM   
peppermint


Posts: 5157
Joined: 10/18/2005
From: Montana
Status: offline
Despite 2 years of trying we haven't been able to get a group started where we live.  We're disappointed but have accepted that a group just isn't going to happen in either of the towns we live in (we're snowbirds).  There had been a group in our MT town in the past, but there was an incident which has made people wary about being part of a group again.  We do miss the ability to attend munches on a regular basis but are happy to attend events when we can. 

Actually, not being a part of any one group has some advantages.  We attend munches and events wherever we travel.  Our normal travel area includes MT, WA, NV, and AZ.  So far all the groups have been very welcoming and we've made some great friends.  We never get involved with any of the politics of the groups.  Frequently there are power struggles within groups and being on the outskirts we can avoid "taking sides" and get to just enjoy what the community we are visiting has to offer.  We've never been ignored when we've attended a munch or function even though we're just passing through. 

Friends we've made over the years have extending some great hospitality to us.  They allow us to park our motor home at their homes.  They let us hook up to electricity for the night.  We normally only see our friends once a year and so we have lots to talk about, as well as sharing new kinky ideas. 



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RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? - 11/14/2007 6:48:16 AM   
sammiebabygirl


Posts: 465
Joined: 10/23/2004
From: Upstate, NY
Status: offline
I live in the Albany, NY area where there are 3, very active groups.
 
I travel 2.5 hours to Syracuse to be with the people I find to be the most inviting and open minded.
 
jen

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RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? - 11/14/2007 7:38:02 AM   
smilezz


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*grinz* at the Irishone...


psstt....He is still over there....but in about 60ish days or sooooo.....HOME!


have a great day!

~smilezz~

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RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? - 11/14/2007 7:40:03 AM   
Zarius


Posts: 184
Joined: 2/9/2007
Status: offline
The Indy local community is very good, sure some drama from time to time, but the groups are all open and accepting of others. The activites within a 30 mile radius is very full, and you have to pick and choose sometimes as to which group you will attend because the "dance cards" are pretty full. From Indy, to Lafayette, to Kokomo, to Anderson, each has a flavor of its own and many are members of several, from SIG, to TNG, to plain ole munches/sloshes to groups that educate and host play parties.




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RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? - 11/14/2007 7:45:45 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: smilezz

*grinz* at the Irishone...


psstt....He is still over there....but in about 60ish days or sooooo.....HOME!


have a great day!

~smilezz~

Well fuck
/kicks the wall



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RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? - 11/14/2007 7:49:24 AM   
KinkyRN


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Joined: 9/21/2007
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Driver1961, You certainly have a point!   I already have formed my own views about my own community and no one else can change those.  You're right, that my views about the same community may be drastically different from someone else's, all based on personal experience. 

I was merely pondering on what makes a good community... wherever you are.. and was interested in what people thought about their own communities.   

--Even if your local community isn't what you would like, or doesn't exist, isn't it great that online communities such as this exist??

Thanks everyone for your answers! 

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RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? - 11/14/2007 8:02:15 AM   
smilezz


Posts: 2156
Joined: 6/18/2004
Status: offline
Offers Purell for the cut i am SURE she got by kicking the wall...and everyone knows that Purell is good for cuts. *EG*


*winks*


I am sure that as soon as The Man steps foot in this Country again, i will be leaving posts all over the place. LOL!


~smilezz~

_____________________________

=It's not my fault that when I was a baby I was dropped in a box of Glitter & I have been shinin' ever since=

�*:-.,_,.-:* � �*:-.,_,.-:* � �*:-.,_,.-:* � �*:-.,_,-:* �

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RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? - 11/14/2007 8:12:49 AM   
azropedntied


Posts: 1829
Joined: 7/25/2005
From: Phx AZ
Status: offline
KinkyRN > yes Its a great community  though its not SF still extreamly active .If you do relocate drop me a line .There are many munches ,partys ,etc to be informed  about
Welcome Back Mr Thorns .> though i would have to disagree with your assesment on butchmans being primarly a gay group , they have  weekend experiances  in all areas and feel they are very diverse .Butchmans has a pansexual , all male , all female ,and advanced weekend experiances .Your right on the money about South West Leather  in phx , its an amazing conf .very educations and diverse .This year we shall also have an onsite dungeon space "thanks to the Dragon Clan " and shall be a grand time , i cant wait !

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RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? - 11/14/2007 8:21:11 AM   
CdnExplorer


Posts: 227
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline
My local community...

Small, closeted, friendly, pan-sexual and very quiet. I like that it's all inclusive, so we don't have any elitism going around, but most people are in long term relationships and keep to themselves. As a new, unattached sub that makes it very hard to meet people.

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RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? - 11/14/2007 9:35:04 AM   
MystressDream


Posts: 345
Joined: 7/11/2004
From: Colorado
Status: offline
The Denver area has had an active community for many years.  At one time we had 21 different groups meeting, so you could take your pick of your interests and mingle with people who shared them.  We have had two local BDSM clubs here, but, due to so many being shut down by authorities many have moved underground again to private parties.  We have a huge battle going on here, and I wish people across the country would get involved.
 
Every year we host Thunder in the Mountains, a three day BDSM event with nationally known presenters and four dungeons for the play party nights.  This year we had over 1000 kinky people show up for the event.  It really is one of the premiere events in the country.
 
I would like to take this opportunity to share some information with you about a crisis we have going on here, however.  The reason I want to share this information is it could impact the clubs across the country.  We have a BDSM club here in Denver. (actually located in Commerce City just north of Denver) 
 
The owners of this club decided before they bought the building and remodeled it and opened a BDSM club, that they would make it completely legal.  Legally licensed, city approved.
 
Well... They went to the city council and all other governing authorities and were completely upfront about what they were wanting to open.  They were told what type of license they would need and that the building was in an appropriate zone.  They purchased the building, and sunk a TON of cash into it. 
 
At the time they were opening, there were even laws on the books against flogging... and bar rules had to apply, such as nipples covered, no genital nudity, etc.
 
These people took on the fight to get BDSM approved and took on the city council over one activity at a time.  They got approval for nudity, all activities that we enjoy except fire play and sexual penetration.  (The fire marshall just can't wrap his mind around us setting people on fire... <grin>)
 
Ok... to try to shorten this... The owners of the Enclave opened the doors and started doing business.  Then, when it was time for the city to issue a permanent license instead of the provisional one, they decided they didn't like what was going on.  The court battles have been going on now for over 4 years.  The city is doing it's damnedest to run the owners out of money so the doors will close. 
 
Yesterday, the Colorado State Supreme Court decided to hear the case.... as appealed by Commerce City.  The Enclave had won appeals requiring the permanent license be issued.  The city just won't give up the fight.
 
I am not saying this will be the only completely legally licensed BDSM club in the country because I don't know that for a fact.  I have searched and can't find another one, but, one may be out there.  The vast majority of the clubs fly under the radar and operate as "private membership social clubs" or "non-profit membership clubs".... both of which can be shut down for allowing sexual activities.  These clubs have been closed down left and right all across the country.  Most of the clubs run under the radar, and have a life expectancy of about three years before the town or city they are in shut them down.  Not coincidentally, this usually occurs when elections are gearing up.  The exceptions to that example are located in places like NYC, SF and LA.
 
If anyone out there gives a damn about this, they could desperately use some help.  NCSF is aware of the fight, but won't get involved until the Supreme Court makes a decision.  ACLU is too busy with other projects, like defending the KKK.  The Enclave, and it's owners, are going down due to the weight and drain of legal fees and harrassment.  Their fight for all of us to have a legal and safe place to gather and enjoy what we do has drained them of all resources and they can't continue the fight.  It looks like the city will win.  Many here in Denver have contributed, but it's just not enough.
 
If you want to contribute to this fight, or read about it, please go to enclavewest dot com for more information.
 
Please... If there are any people out there who can help this fight, please do so.  This could impact BDSM clubs across the country.
 
Also, please feel free to contact me off MB if you want more information.  But, that website has everything there.  It is a beautiful club, and we just hate to see it go down to the courts, and to watch as our lifestyle and activities are once again stomped out by government authorities.


_____________________________

Knowledge and experience are wonderful things to share. When we stop asking questions, we might as well "hang it up".

check out: www.enclaveproductions.com
www.enclavewest.com

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RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? - 11/14/2007 9:47:58 AM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline
well, apparently i haven't looked at population statistics for San Antonio in quite sometime...i was thinking it is nearly 1 million people here...nope...nearly 2 million people here...and there is only 1 city above SA (Pittsburg) that does not combine cities (and a couple that cross state lines) to form a metropolitan area to make it a larger area than San Antonio...which results in SA being the 29th most populated metropolitan area in the USA ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_United_States_metropolitan_areas )

anyway...all that to say that the San Antonio BDSM community is fractured into cliques that rival a 7th grade throw down in the school cafeteria....i hold no loyalties to any of them...i attend all groups as i am comfortable...just like i did in 7th grade...

chelle


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RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? - 11/14/2007 10:11:37 AM   
GhitaAmati


Posts: 3263
Joined: 5/30/2007
Status: offline
Ive been in several cities in Florida, but my favorite community wise was Jacksonville. A huge, very active Leather community, wonderful people, not very cliquish at all (a few spin offs I guess but on a whole a great group). They had events and educational meetings and parties and community service type things almost every week if not twice a week. There was always something going on and everyone would step up to help someone else who had a need. It was great. There was also a fiarly active BDSM community that was just getting started but heading off on a great foot when I left there six years ago. They had managed to organize a monthly play party at a bar in town and become friendly enough with the local LE that there were no issues. Jacksonville also have several Leather bars that have been around for a long time and differenct groups were always great about supporting other groups. I had to move back down here to the Ocala area and all I can say about my local community is "what community???". It sucks here. Literally. There is a monthly munch and play party that is held out in Dunnellon, which is an hour and a half away from me and generally about 5 couples show up and tons of single male submissives. The play parties generally consist of 2 FemDoms doing CBT on at least five males and I really dont like watching CBT so I spend the whole party in the living room drinking beer and watching football...which I easily could have done at home and saved on gas. Up in Gainesville there is a much more active group who we have met once and honestly they all seemed to be really great people but unfortunantly my Sirs ex is best friends with the lady who runs the Gainesville group and the ex is a psychotic maniac who starts screaming at me anytime I am anywhere near her (she started cussing at me at a public playground once when by chance we took our kids to the same park).....So anyway we dont go up to Gainesville. Out here in the Forest near where I live there are at least 15 couples who would all love to be a part of a BDSM community. My Sir and I have taken most of them out to dinner or met at a bar at least once to get to know them, but no one has been able to really organize a community. Work schedules and lack of anyone with a home available for a party or anything like that has kept anything like that from happening ever. Maybe one day when the construction is finished on my house I will try.....we'll see.....

_____________________________

I said I was a submissive, I never said I was a GOOD submissive.


Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good.
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RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? - 11/14/2007 10:25:21 AM   
Alumbrado


Posts: 5560
Status: offline
The people in Memphis have a great group, lots of helping out each other and the local dungeon, seminars, munches, SIGs, and so forth. There has been friction between personalities in the past, and I'm sure stuff like that goes on everywhere, but overall I'm glad to be part of the local scene. I'm looking forward to more people becoming active locally.

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RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? - 11/14/2007 10:29:53 AM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: scottjk

Umm, did I say too much?


No, you just told your truth. I think when anyone finds a group in all this, it starts out seen as just WONDERFUL! The longer you are there, the layers of the onion gets peeled away and you see it for what it is.
 
It's not bad for everyone though.  One man's trash is another man's treasure.

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RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? - 11/14/2007 10:37:26 AM   
laurell3


Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline
When I first got involved in the lifestyle I started corresponding with a local group here and was about to attend a meeting.  However, some major drama ensued with resulted in several members outting each other publicly and I ran away and hid.  Several years later a friend of mine who had partially taken over that group after the fallout happened said that it had happened again in a similar manner.  I guess it says something about me as a person maybe, but given my experiences here, I don't have enough faith in a large group of people I don't know to act responsibly with something that for many reasons I have to keep discrete and stay away from it.

It sounds like some of you have had better experiences.  I'm glad you have that.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

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RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? - 11/14/2007 11:40:15 AM   
NICouple


Posts: 31
Joined: 8/14/2006
Status: offline
in my area (rural, but with 2 decent sized universities, in North Idaho), it is abysmal, get more than 4 people together and the backstabbing starts. then there is the age problem ("I'm 21, I know EVERYTHING, your old, your experience means nothing"), not to mention having to order almost everything online (local adult shops barely carry anything kinky?)


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RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? - 11/14/2007 12:09:23 PM   
sweetnurseBBW


Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline
The area I live in is very scarce and not very organized.  It has always been that way in my area ever since I can remember. The larger metro areas are at least 1-2 hours away.  Price you pay for living well in the boonies.

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RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? - 11/14/2007 12:52:47 PM   
BringerOfTears


Posts: 19
Joined: 6/13/2007
Status: offline
Some communities develop better social skills than others.  In Sacramento, our first group was run by someone who ran it as his personal harem and ran anyone out who stood up to him.  When I started another group to cater to all the people run out of the other group, it split the community despite my best efforts.  Our community has been fractured ever since although we now have a fairly active community with a group for female dominants, a newbie (meaning if you like using newbies, hang out at that munch) and my old group.

We have one dedicated playspace, a suburban house run by a longtime fixture in the community.  She has her own crowd who don't tend to attend other groups although there is some overlap.  It is quite sad really.

SF of course has a massive community with munches every week of all sorts.

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RE: How would you rate your BDSM community? - 11/14/2007 12:53:58 PM   
SingleRarity


Posts: 320
Joined: 9/13/2006
Status: offline
Chicago has a wonderful scene, but it is fractured into the older and younger crowds. Well, not exclusively old/young, but more along the lines of healthy, attractive, successful vs. old, fat leather men who think anyone new to the scene should be honored to suck their cocks because they’ve been flogging asses for twenty some years.     Yikes! I sound like a biyatch.  I’m a nice girl. I swear. There are great people in this city; you just have to find them.  Daddy and I have a great kinky family here, and a great club, Galleria Domain 2.    The city has two other clubs, and the SINS club out in the burbs.   Daddy’s Ballerina “e”

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