RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (Full Version)

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subspace08 -> RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (12/2/2007 2:55:49 AM)

A submissive isn't really owned. Slaves are owned. A submissive can submit to anyone she feels like




lusciouslips19 -> RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (12/2/2007 3:29:33 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: hisannabelle

greetings lusciouslips19,

if i'm not mistaken, sambamanslilgirl has both a daddy and a fiance who is her dom...you might want to message her to ask her if you're curious. she seems to be a pretty cool chick, i'm sure she wouldn't mind answering questions.

personally, what works for them works for them. :) i know that it's possible for me to be in love with two people at the same time, so i can imagine being owned by two people at the same time...but the possibility of finding someone who fits into our dynamic and is comfortable co-dominating with my master is probably very small, because it'd have to be a pretty much perfect fit for both of us, and we're happy with the way things are now. we are poly, but our relationships with others are not usually d/s based (although i'm definitely willing to bottom or serve on occasion). we have talked about me possibly getting into a more long-term commitment with someone else, but it's likely that that person would not have ownership of me.

respectfully,
annabelle.



The reason I havent is because I do not want to come across disrespectful and I dont want someone to think they have to defend themselves. It does seem pretty amazing because I know how hard it is to find one that fits into ones kink, let alone 2.




eyesopened -> RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (12/2/2007 3:55:21 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl

That's an easy one. If a Dom can own several subs, then those subs can be owned by several Doms. Life is a two way street.


i'm not sure it's exactly a two-way street.  i believe human beings are capable of loving, respecting, enjoying many people.  It's not gender or role specific.

How can a waiter or waitress serve several tables and make each group of diners feel special and remember who asked for extra mayo?  i once worked as an administrative assistant in a situation where my boss was the Manager of Admisitrative Services but i 'served' or supported three different company directors and on occassion did special projects for other company officers.  It wasn't difficult at all.  It was easy to remember who required what, and each director's quirks and demands.  Time management perhaps isn't a skill everyone has but i never felt in conflict and none of the directors were ever left to feel their needs had not been met.




lusciouslips19 -> RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (12/2/2007 4:36:56 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: eyesopened

quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl

That's an easy one. If a Dom can own several subs, then those subs can be owned by several Doms. Life is a two way street.


i'm not sure it's exactly a two-way street.  i believe human beings are capable of loving, respecting, enjoying many people.  It's not gender or role specific.

How can a waiter or waitress serve several tables and make each group of diners feel special and remember who asked for extra mayo?  i once worked as an administrative assistant in a situation where my boss was the Manager of Admisitrative Services but i 'served' or supported three different company directors and on occassion did special projects for other company officers.  It wasn't difficult at all.  It was easy to remember who required what, and each director's quirks and demands.  Time management perhaps isn't a skill everyone has but i never felt in conflict and none of the directors were ever left to feel their needs had not been met.



A slave can serve anyone or everyone. But that doesnt mean that they are owned by everyone they serve .




eyesopened -> RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (12/2/2007 4:59:42 AM)

There can be more than one name on the title of a vehicle, more than one name on a deed.  People can share ownership of whatever they choose.  What makes relationships work is common goals, everyone travelling in the same direction.  How can divorced parents share custody?  How can a band share royalties?  Personally, i don't see how it is much of a stretch to see how there can be two Owners of a single piece of property as long as everyone knows up front the purpose of that property.




KatyLied -> RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (12/2/2007 5:32:18 AM)

quote:

A submissive isn't really owned. A submissive can submit to anyone she feels like


There are dynamics in which submissives are owned property.





RCdc -> RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (12/2/2007 5:37:43 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subspace08

A submissive isn't really owned. Slaves are owned. A submissive can submit to anyone she feels like


[sm=banghead.gif]
Where did this definition originate?
I'll let Darcy know, that I'm not really 'owned'.  I know many of the submissives here who have masters will feel the same of such a statement that they aren't really 'owned'.
I didn't get a 'choice' - my submission doesn't work like that.
Crap myths abound still hey - you would think that grown adults would have outgrown such fairytales.
 
the.dark.




juliaoceania -> RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (12/2/2007 5:42:51 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

quote:

ORIGINAL: subspace08

A submissive isn't really owned. Slaves are owned. A submissive can submit to anyone she feels like


[sm=banghead.gif]
Where did this definition originate?
I'll let Darcy know, that I'm not really 'owned'.  I know many of the submissives here who have masters will feel the same of such a statement that they aren't really 'owned'.
I didn't get a 'choice' - my submission doesn't work like that.
Crap myths abound still hey - you would think that grown adults would have outgrown such fairytales.
 
the.dark.

 
This goes along with the myth that one has to be fully collared to be owned... being owned is a mindset, not a symbol.




sambamanslilgirl -> RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (12/2/2007 7:40:49 AM)

hi

being  "owned" by 2 Doms may sound confusing to you however it works perfectly for us. in this relationship, there's no Alpha Dom. just two separate relationship ...each one unique from the other.

Daddy is merely Daddy in my life ...a father-figure to guide His daughter towards her goals in her submissive life. we have a loving, non-sexual, long distance relationship in which we both agreed upon when we moved towards this dynamic. yes i'm collared by Daddy and we have a lifetime commitment to each other as Daddy and daugher. it was His goal for me to find and be with another man yet keeping our relationship as well.

my fiance will be both Dom/husband. we'll have the best of both worlds (nilla and kink) but keeping the kink side private and behind locked bedroom doors. as you can imagine, finding a second was hard because i was asked to give up my relationship with Daddy if i wanted to be with them. i can understand their jealousy yet i'm not dumping Him.  it took awhile when i wasn't really searching to find the one guy who understood Daddy's place in my life and wants us to continue that special relationship even after we're married.  incidentially, i will be wearing 2 collars on my wedding day.

i hope that answers your questions. 




IrishMist -> RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (12/2/2007 7:49:17 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subspace08

A submissive isn't really owned. Slaves are owned. A submissive can submit to anyone she feels like

That may be so in your own reality; but for the reality of others, who ARE submissive; this statement of yours is false.




juliaoceania -> RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (12/2/2007 7:51:01 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

quote:

ORIGINAL: subspace08

A submissive isn't really owned. Slaves are owned. A submissive can submit to anyone she feels like

That may be so in your own reality; but for the reality of others, who ARE submissive; this statement of yours is false.


My question is what does her reality have to do with reality?[:D]




IrishMist -> RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (12/2/2007 7:52:18 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

quote:

ORIGINAL: subspace08

A submissive isn't really owned. Slaves are owned. A submissive can submit to anyone she feels like

That may be so in your own reality; but for the reality of others, who ARE submissive; this statement of yours is false.


My question is what does her reality have to do with reality?[:D]

LMAO
Julia.....hush

LOL

now I am giggling thanks to you

[&:]




DesFIP -> RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (12/2/2007 8:04:06 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19


I guess what I have trouble with is that I think that if the chips were down in an arguement between 2 Masters and if you were required to choose, there is 1 who would take precedence over the other. So I think this 1 would be the true Master. Even if you own a dog. You may have 2 owners but one is looked at by the dog as the alpha and the one who ultimately is really in charge.


Hopefully you pick two intelligent, mature men who are amenable to discussing conflicting rules.

Now I know of a sub/sub couple where they both have outside dominants. In their case the rules that allow the marriage to flourish comes first and the outside dominants accept those rules. If those rules were onerous, then the dominants would not be compatible with the subs.

And I don't think that there ever needs to be a face off between the two. Not if they aren't chest beating silverback gorillas. My daughter's show horse obeys both the trainers she has and her. He doesn't demand that one trumps the other. He does demand that he isn't given conflicting cues. But since all three are in agreement on what he needs to do, there isn't any argument. My late, loved dog didn't need an alpha, she was fine accepting all of us as equally within the rights of telling her to get off the sofa, or into the car.

The fact that you need one clear authority doesn't mean everyone does. I've known one secretary to work for the whole department. It was understood that some work was more important and therefore would be done first. People who tried to interfere with that were told off for not being devoted to the well being of the department. They were the ones who got fired, not her.




Mercnbeth -> RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (12/2/2007 8:27:28 AM)

this slave would agree with others who have suggested you approach folk who are owned by more than one and ask them directly, although there might be those who will answer here in your post.
 
this slave is owned by one and there is no other Dominant or dominant influence that she is responsible to/for, so she can't answer your query firsthand.
 
however, there is no D/s "Bible" that we all pay homage to by insisting one must _________________ to identify as _______________.  it has been this slave's experience that D/s and M/s relationships are made up of unique individuals, who identify however it suits them and makes sense to them...they write their own Bibles, answer to their own set of rules and call each other whatever they agree upon.




AquaticSub -> RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (12/2/2007 10:09:32 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subspace08

A submissive isn't really owned. Slaves are owned. A submissive can submit to anyone she feels like


Really? I'd love for you to call Valyraen and explain this to him. He will be very amused.




AquaticSub -> RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (12/2/2007 10:12:53 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

My daughter's show horse obeys both the trainers she has and her. He doesn't demand that one trumps the other. He does demand that he isn't given conflicting cues. But since all three are in agreement on what he needs to do, there isn't any argument. My late, loved dog didn't need an alpha, she was fine accepting all of us as equally within the rights of telling her to get off the sofa, or into the car.



Just thought it was worth repeating. [:)]




OsideGirl -> RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (12/2/2007 10:40:49 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19
How do you share ownership with someone you dont know?
I'm curious, how do you know that they don't know each other? Just think of it as a timeshare home. Multiple people have ownership of a property and use it for a specific purpose and time.

quote:

Why would one want to share a slave?
Either unable to fulfill a necessary part of a relationship or lack of wanting to fulfill part of a relationship. Each Dom would fulfill a different part of the submissives needs.

quote:

If you co-own, is that not in some way a relinquishing of part of the ownership?
I co-own two cars with my Master/husband. It doesn't make either car less mine or less his.




OsideGirl -> RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (12/2/2007 10:42:10 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: subspace08

A submissive isn't really owned. Slaves are owned. A submissive can submit to anyone she feels like


Really? I'd love for you to call Valyraen and explain this to him. He will be very amused.
Yup, my Master would be amused as well.




AquaticSub -> RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (12/2/2007 10:43:42 AM)

It would be great - Val and I could use the laugh! [:)]




OsideGirl -> RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom (12/2/2007 10:47:45 AM)

I read that line to his Tallness and he put his hands up behind his head, laid back, and sighed...."yeah, right".




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