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need suggestions for getting out of this funk i'm in - 12/31/2007 8:21:27 AM

christine1

Posts: 6155
Joined: 12/15/2007
From: i'm headed to HIM...
Status: offline

Hello all,

the last few weeks i've been experiencing the most unpleasant, funky mood. i don't think i'm depressed, but nothing is really exciting me much. i have closed down my profile and blocked mail from my ISP account, i just don't care if anyone contacts me or not and i don't care to contact them. maybe i'm just tired of the crap i get from online people, i don't know.

i haven't gone through something like this before so i can't say what it is. if anyone can relate and knows how to pull out of it, i'd appreciate some input. thanks.

Post #: 1

RE: need suggestions for getting out of this funk i'm in - 12/31/2007 9:14:04 AM

Phin

Posts: 1802
Joined: 2/26/2007
Status: offline

are you withdrawing from physical life as well? Is your vanilla life suffering?

If eithe of those are yes, I would make an appointment with a theapist or psycoligist. If you feel that being open about your lifestyle choices to your doctor will be a good idea (and it probably is) you may want to check out the Kink Aware Professionals list http://www.ncsfreedom.org/index.php?option=com_wrapper&Itemid=75

Phin

_____________________________

"Isn't wonderful when our bruises show what we hide in the back of our heads?"Fayetteville band, Nephilym

"He is my angel, my devil, my naughty boy, but above anything else my Master"My girl sin

(in reply to christine1)

Post #: 2

RE: need suggestions for getting out of this funk i'm in - 12/31/2007 9:40:38 AM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline

This is actually the first year in 7 yrs where I didn't have a bout of seasonal affective disorder. Usually these months make me very .. I don't know, empty I guess.
Part of it is weather but only a bit so those daylight lightbulbs do not help me at all.
Part of is it associating it with various molestations in my early life.
And a lot of it had to do with not feeling as though I was good enough for anyone.
This year it is colder and grayer than the last one. Being forced to "do the holiday" has not changed though I now let people know I find the holidays distasteful.
And the part about not feeling good enough has not changed.

So what is different this year which? How come I don't feel that familar depression?

I think because there are things in my life which are making sad, and I can acknowlege them. These are not ghosts from my past, or associating things with weather, and I haven't suddenly felt enlightened by my talents. There are actually two or three identifiable situations which make it ok for me to be sad. And in an odd way this has freed me from depression.

As the season started and I had to face my son moving away, not having my mate and losing my cat, I decided I better fill my life with other things. I thought that the usual depression would be crazy bad this year due to the extra stress. I felt what I needed was some distraction.

So I took on a part time job, got myself some craft stuff to work on, bought some anime books to read (exciting, fun, but non committal), made myself some cute clothes and went on a buying spree that would put the last 8 yrs to shame. I have waaaaaaaaaay too many corsets now, but just knowing they are there makes me happier.

And I don't feel the sadness I expected. I don't feel the need to hide away. I actually feel like this year coming is going to be better. LOL I mean.. how can it be worse? I feel like I have faced my fears and it didn't kill me.

The key though was recognising that there may be things in your life which are not quite working out. And then finding something to fill in while you see what else is out there.
Sometimes face to face friends can help, or online buddies who want nothing more than conversation from you.

Good luck,
Kyst

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley

(in reply to christine1)

Post #: 3

RE: need suggestions for getting out of this funk i'm in - 12/31/2007 9:50:21 AM

MissSCD

Posts: 1185
Joined: 3/10/2007
Status: offline

The holiday season can bring on depression. Just recalling my mean old cousin from this year tops all of the past seasons.
We overspend. We overeat. We overdo everything,and what we need to do is to find someone and help them during Christmas.
I would see a doc. It could be hormone related. It could be just seasonal. Whatever it is, it needs to be checked out.

Regards, MissSCD

(in reply to Missokyst)

Post #: 4

RE: need suggestions for getting out of this funk i'm in - 12/31/2007 10:02:59 AM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline

:) this is the first year I have lost weight intead of gained. I have not over eaten. I did not spend too much on my offspring. I invested my cash in me for a change, it was oddly freeing.
Have you ever talked to a doc about the seasonal thing?
Do doctors really pay attention these days to things like depression? I mean, other than to offer up some drug to mask the feelings?
If they do I may look into that next year as the season rolls around again.
Kyst

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissSCD
We overspend. We overeat. We overdo everything,and what we need to do is to find someone and help them during Christmas.
I would see a doc. It could be hormone related. It could be just seasonal. Whatever it is, it needs to be checked out.

Regards, MissSCD

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley

(in reply to MissSCD)

Post #: 5

RE: need suggestions for getting out of this funk i'm in - 12/31/2007 10:24:26 AM

Badpunzel

Posts: 59
Joined: 12/24/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: christine1

Hello all,

the last few weeks i've been experiencing the most unpleasant, funky mood. i don't think i'm depressed, but nothing is really exciting me much. i have closed down my profile and blocked mail from my ISP account, i just don't care if anyone contacts me or not and i don't care to contact them. maybe i'm just tired of the crap i get from online people, i don't know.

i haven't gone through something like this before so i can't say what it is. if anyone can relate and knows how to pull out of it, i'd appreciate some input. thanks.

Have you also found yourself getting frustrated/angry at things that never really bothered you before? Have you started avoiding dealing with people in your meatlife as well as your online life, as you have mentioned?

You sound as though you may be a bit bored with the routine your life is in right now. Was there one turning point in your change of mood in the last few weeks that you can remember? A defining event?

(in reply to christine1)

Post #: 6

RE: need suggestions for getting out of this funk i'm in - 12/31/2007 10:34:25 AM

christine1

Posts: 6155
Joined: 12/15/2007
From: i'm headed to HIM...
Status: offline

i think a big part of my problem is, yes, that i am bored. i need a new routine perhaps and i need to make some new friends here. i've been back in salt lake for 3 years now and i haven't really clicked with anyone friend wise...that is part of the problem as well. another thing is, is that my youngest is going to be 18 in a few months and he isn't needing me like he used to and he is off doing his own thing so i'm alone a lot more. so i think i need to find a few new things to fill in the boredom and alone time and try to find some friends to do things with. that is a start anyway.

(in reply to Badpunzel)

Post #: 7

RE: need suggestions for getting out of this funk i'm in - 12/31/2007 12:47:38 PM

christine1

Posts: 6155
Joined: 12/15/2007
From: i'm headed to HIM...
Status: offline

Thank you Phin for the link, it might also be helpful for me to talk to someone.

(in reply to christine1)

Post #: 8

RE: need suggestions for getting out of this funk i'm in - 12/31/2007 2:17:54 PM

Phin

Posts: 1802
Joined: 2/26/2007
Status: offline

YVW. After reading your second post I would defanately reccomend a theapist. There is no shame, I see one myself.

_____________________________

"Isn't wonderful when our bruises show what we hide in the back of our heads?"Fayetteville band, Nephilym

"He is my angel, my devil, my naughty boy, but above anything else my Master"My girl sin

(in reply to christine1)

Post #: 9

RE: need suggestions for getting out of this funk i'm in - 12/31/2007 4:41:44 PM

canupleaseme

Posts: 775
Joined: 7/9/2006
Status: offline

Hi, I think on the whole 70% of my family anf friends dont like this time of year and fine this particular bit (new year) quite depressing. Personally ive gradually got worse and worse with my anxiety problems since october to the point my ocd has become quite out of control and I really really need to see someone about it. Just admiting that to myself has been a big issue. I wish I could offer you some really good advice but I really dont know what to say im in the same boat so Il offer a big fat hug and a happy new year

_____________________________

Proud mistress

(in reply to Phin)

Post #: 10

RE: need suggestions for getting out of this funk i'm in - 12/31/2007 4:49:55 PM

christine1

Posts: 6155
Joined: 12/15/2007
From: i'm headed to HIM...
Status: offline

well thanks....hugs are always a good thing!

(in reply to canupleaseme)

Post #: 11

RE: need suggestions for getting out of this funk i'm in - 12/31/2007 5:08:26 PM

dawntreader

Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline

Christine,

All of the above advice is great - i agree with talking with someone, it helps :-)

i felt like this myself 2 years ago and it was overwhelming. But what was actually occurring was a death and a birth. my old self was dying ( for a long awhile - i just did not know it) and a new self was being awakened (hence the symbol of Kundalini on my back). It was as emotionally painful as physical labor and i was totally lost for a couple of months.

Perhaps you are getting ready for something similar - your youngest is almost out and your time to really be you is on the horizon. This can be as exciting a time for you as it is bitter sweet. i strongly suggest you find someone to guide you whether it is a therapist, a spiritual advisor (mine was a Daoist), or a very supportive friend.

Who knows...you could be in a chrysalis stage right now preparing to metamorph into a most beautiful butterfly :-)

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to christine1)

Post #: 12

RE: need suggestions for getting out of this funk i'm in - 12/31/2007 5:10:29 PM

thornhappy

Posts: 8596
Joined: 12/16/2006
Status: offline

Hi Christine--

When my migraines were out of control, my neurologist wondered if I also was depressed (I wasn't but was unsatisfied with my job at the time.)

One of the things she recommended for fighting migraines (or depression - similar chemistry is involved) is some type of aerobic exercise, 4 or 5 days a week. Anything that you like & gets the heart rate up a bit, for about 30 minutes. It helps adjust a variety of neurotransmitters that can lighten mood. Start off slow, and work up to more days of the week.

V/r,

thornhappy

(in reply to christine1)

Post #: 13

RE: need suggestions for getting out of this funk i'm in - 12/31/2007 5:13:58 PM

christine1

Posts: 6155
Joined: 12/15/2007
From: i'm headed to HIM...
Status: offline

now that is something that makes complete sense to me! thank you so much for your comment and your insight...i am going to take this to heart and "explore" from here. you've made me realize that this doesn't necessarily need to be a bad thing, that much good can come from it....thank you!

(in reply to dawntreader)

Post #: 14

RE: need suggestions for getting out of this funk i'm in - 12/31/2007 5:17:34 PM

dawntreader

Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline

Thankyou :-)

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to christine1)

Post #: 15

RE: need suggestions for getting out of this funk i'm in - 12/31/2007 5:32:55 PM

OldBastardly1

Posts: 651
Joined: 7/22/2006
From: Atlanta, GA
Status: offline

This might seem simple, but it does help me.

When you are feeling the funk say to yourself ( even out loud if you can ) "yep, I am in a funk....cool....I will get through this, my life isn't over and I *will* feel much better soon. I have done this before , so I know I can do it now and I will do it again. "

Don't beat yourself up over it.

_____________________________

Old Bastard

"You cannot make footprints in the sands of time if you're sitting on your butt. And who wants to make buttprints in the sands of time?" -- Bob Moawad

(in reply to christine1)

Post #: 16

RE: need suggestions for getting out of this funk i'm in - 12/31/2007 5:44:48 PM

SageFemmexx

Posts: 240
Joined: 1/2/2007
Status: offline

When I went through a bad funk episode I made a list--I put myself in a women's gym and worked out on regular basis, I signed up for counseling once a week and I started school. Sometimes it's a sign you need to work on your physical, mental and emotional aspects of your life.

As for SADD--consider yourself a plant and add a full spectum light to your life--put it anywhere you sit on a regular basis and you will find it helps a great deal with seasonal depression.

Blessings and Be Well,

(in reply to OldBastardly1)

Post #: 17

RE: need suggestions for getting out of this funk i'm in - 12/31/2007 10:40:33 PM

FangsNfeet

Posts: 3758
Joined: 12/3/2004
Status: offline

It's time for you to go dancing in the rain. Fifteen to thrity minuets should do the trick.

_____________________________

I'm Godzilla and you're Japan

(in reply to christine1)

Post #: 18

RE: need suggestions for getting out of this funk i'm in - 12/31/2007 11:12:47 PM

Kumasan2

Posts: 182
Joined: 11/20/2007
Status: offline

Some symptoms of Seasonal Affective Disorder, fairly common. As odd as it may seem, you might want to consider going to a tanning booth once or twice a week. The bulbs in the booths put out the same light as daylight and can have a very positive effect on mood.

I know a couple of people who have SAD who use this method with great success. It's not very expensive and may be worth a shot if you have poor or no insurance.

Best of luck to you.

_____________________________

"A Master, if He is indeed wise,
does not bid you enter the house of His wisdom,
but rather leads you to the threshold of your own mind." -Kahlil Gibran

(in reply to FangsNfeet)

Post #: 19

RE: need suggestions for getting out of this funk i'm in - 12/31/2007 11:16:00 PM

sexyred1

Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kumasan2

Some symptoms of Seasonal Affective Disorder, fairly common. As odd as it may seem, you might want to consider going to a tanning booth once or twice a week. The bulbs in the booths put out the same light as daylight and can have a very positive effect on mood.

I know a couple of people who have SAD who use this method with great success. It's not very expensive and may be worth a shot if you have poor or no insurance.

Best of luck to you.

Oh no, bad advice. Tanning booths will cause wrinkles and then that will make her more depressed.

(in reply to Kumasan2)

Post #: 20

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