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RE: Does BDSM Require Money? - 1/21/2008 1:39:18 PM   
MsSaskia


Posts: 415
Joined: 9/9/2004
From: Denver
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: touchofeuphoria

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam

Not to her, apparently. But, there are plenty who do not require tribute. If you find a picture that you like, read her profile, too. Pretty soon, you'll get a feel for who does and who doesn't want tribute.

Master Fire



It wasn't about me making the mistake of choosing the wrong women. All I did was pay her a compliment on her looks.

I have read all of your posts, everyone, and I really do appreciate your opinions. Thank you.


MasterFireMaam's advice is good.  I'd add that there are too many people on the web to let yourself be disappointed when one of them says something stupid when you approach them.  Maybe she (the person you contacted) was just having a bad day and wasn't thinking when she responded that way or maybe she really does regularly get people to send her ten whole dollars at a time for pretty much nothing.  When I get messages from people that are giving me a quick compliment, I respond with a 'thank you' if I have time.  I don't discuss money unless someone says they'd like to see me professionally and would like to know my fees, and even then I refer them to my website. 

Gotta wonder what she needs $10 for, though, and how you'd get it to her. 

(in reply to touchofeuphoria)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Does BDSM Require Money? - 1/21/2008 2:12:12 PM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline 		FR

Okay, I simply MUST make another profile on the other side of the slash, and I promise not to make any rude remarks when I respond to emails.  I take paypal.

CaliDomme
(trying on new outfit)


_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to MsSaskia)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Does BDSM Require Money? - 1/21/2008 2:41:22 PM   
tigerstyle


Posts: 168
Joined: 5/25/2005
Status: offline 		Now where's that "Low Income Dominants" thread....

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Does BDSM Require Money? - 1/25/2008 3:39:39 AM   
MistressUltimate


Posts: 15
Joined: 11/27/2007
Status: offline 		<< Sighhhhhhhhhhs .
Off we go.  Insults on both sides, which will probably soon deteriorate into attempts at funny one liners sent by those who either cannot be arsed or are incapable of formulating a valid response and who certainly don't read anyone elses posts thoroughly before pressing that lil send key.

Why is it that some people cannot respect another's point of view, skim briefly over what the other has said without taking time to THINK about the content and then reply with an attack?

I hold my hands up to being guilty of this at odd times as we all know how angry we can get if we feel we are being attacked. 

Let's all try to  to say 'er well I see that you are really earnest in what you are saying and maybe you do have some valid points, however I don't agree with you because,......' then let's hear some sensible and none abusive reasons as to why they may not agree?

I spent a LOT of time formulating and typing my views on the pro domming issue and haven't yet seen one sensible and thought out response to any of my points. Could this be because 1/ Its not been read in detail 2/ The pro domme haters don't have a (sensible and none fanatical) reply?

You know, I find it peculiar that on IC most people accept pro domming as a valuable and good way of supplying a safe and sane outlet for those who do not wish to take the time, effort and great expense of going to events and trying to form a relationship with someone in the hope that they will eventually get a 'play'.  Yet, on this site, the vast majority seem to 'have it in' for professionals. I happen to know a great many people realtime on IC..they go to the same clubs as I and we have seen each other play many many times, so I KNOW that these people have extensive realtime experience, as they know that I do also.

Does that say anything about the pro domme haters on this site? 

No comment!



< Message edited by MistressUltimate -- 1/25/2008 4:05:36 AM >

(in reply to MsSaskia)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Does BDSM Require Money? - 1/25/2008 5:38:42 AM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline 		I had another thought in general to this thread that is not specific to pro doms.

Unless you live in a barter economy, very rare these days especially those those of us on this board -- I'm betting you didn't a batch of cookies or a bolt of wool for your computer and the time online -- of course it takes money,

Life takes money.

Even if one never buys equipment but sticks with what the body and mind can do, you probably have a partner (top or bottom, sub or dom, whatever). They have to eat, they need shelter, they need clothes once they leave the house, etc. That takes money.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to touchofeuphoria)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Does BDSM Require Money? - 1/25/2008 5:48:48 AM   
DominaRapport


Posts: 34
Joined: 1/22/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

...they need clothes once they leave the house...


So if I never let them out, I don't have to give their clothes back?!

_____________________________

Actions speak louder than words. Don't tell me about your sincerity, show me.

(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Does BDSM Require Money? - 1/25/2008 11:09:41 AM   
AFlyInYourWeb


Posts: 284
Joined: 8/30/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: touchofeuphoria

She ended the message with how she requires a tribute of at least $10 to be her slave. I told her that I'm not interested in paying for this lifestyle. 



Ten dollars sounds like a "token tribute".  Hell, here in NY, ten bucks doesn't even buy a movie ticket.  I just spent that much, with tip, on breakfast at a local diner this morning.

I've run into this sort of thing in the past.  The "Tribute" usually has little or no monetary value, but usually required hours of effort on my part...all of it spent thinking of her.  I'm sure that was the real point of the exercise.

In one case, I had to find a small stone of a certain size, shape, and patina.  It took an entire day in the countryside searching the ground with a ruler in hand.  I only wish I could have gotten off as easily as slipping a ten into an envelope

The ten dollars may be a test of your sincerity, or it could be a set-up for a larger scam.  There's no way of knowing without going where angels fear to tread.   

_____________________________

Stories: http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=334308
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=335720
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=336666
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=337911

(in reply to touchofeuphoria)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Does BDSM Require Money? - 1/25/2008 11:17:27 AM   
stevepops


Posts: 41
Joined: 11/12/2004
Status: offline 		Thanks for sharing - what a great concept.

No - I think there is a distinction to be made between living a lifestyle and making a living.

SP



(in reply to AFlyInYourWeb)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Does BDSM Require Money? - 1/25/2008 11:28:52 AM   
PanthersMom


Posts: 2215
Joined: 11/26/2007
From: Cleveland Ohio
Status: offline 		some folks are just more high maintenance than others.  happens in all walks of life

PM

_____________________________

That which does not kill me, better run pretty damn fast

I miss my ex, but my aim is improving!




(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Does BDSM Require Money? - 1/25/2008 1:53:16 PM   
cyberdude611


Posts: 2596
Joined: 5/7/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressUltimate

I am a professional and yes, people pay me for my services, just as they pay a solicitor, hairdresser, accountant, fuel services, restaurants, nights at the pub, etc. They have a free choice in how they spend their cash and what they spend it on. My profile states quite clearly that I am in business, but that I am also a lifestyler and have been for some time. I also get messages complimenting me on my profile/pics/etc and I always take the time to type out a thankyou to those kind enough to do this.  I only ask for money if and when they ask me if they can book me for a session.


Interesting...how much taxes do you pay on that income? Do you even report that income? Do you have a business license? Because the hairdresser, the accountant, and server at the restaurant has to pay taxes and their businesses have licenses.
 
I mean you say its a business, right? Dont prostitutes consider what they do a business as well?

quote:



Clients approach me. I do not drag them kicking and screaming off the streets ( much as some would enjoy it) and force them to submit to me. Many clients have a happy marriage and are loving fathers and husbands, who have a very very real need to submit, but are married to partners who do not feel that same need. Is it not better to visit me for a none sexual, none committed session than to seek another partner and maybe break up a happy marriage?



And make $300 an hour in the process. Sounds great.

quote:




All my clients seek none commitment enjoyable submission in a safe environment and are willing to pay for it as a service that they can then say goodbye to and walk away from. They are aware that, if they wished, they could go to a public fetish BDSM club and play for free. They are not stupid.



Most could pick up a hooker on the street, pay them a $100 and get a BJ out of it. That hooker isnt going to tell anyone either.

quote:



I have a LOT of experience, many who use this site and on IC know me realtime and I play on an almost daily basis, both professionally and also at clubs and with personal slaves. I am safe and I am sane. I am not some amateur setting up as a pro and damaging peoples bodies, minds and pockets. I do not spam or send pasted messages as the lady in question did in this instance and I do have a very professional website and I paid someone to it put together, just as clients pay me to 'take them apart'. I am not a pushy person, I dont try to badger or bully or entice clients.



So any woman who doesnt charge money is inexperienced? Funny I know a woman that has been doing BDSM for 20 years and doesnt charge a dime from her subs. Sure they give her gifts sometimes, but she does not require it nor request it.

quote:



For those who don't know.....I receive at least a dozen emails a day from people asking to book me and I can honestly say that if I find just one genuine client in twentyfour time wasting wankers, who will happily exchange long winded messages for as long as I am stupid enough to keep replying to them, I consider myself lucky. No wonder that we sometimes ask for a small sum of cash to prove we are not wasting hours and hours of our time.



Then dont create a profile and post sexual pictures. Do the searching on your own. You start posting sexy pictures and the "wankers" will come in droves. That's common sense.

quote:



On behalf of us pros who care about our clients, ensure that we give value for hard earned cash and constantly strive to improve our service, I ask that you realise that people are just people and do vary in their actions and personalities. Please do not judge us all by one greedy idiot, but take the time to get to know something about us and other professionals as individuals before consigning us to the fake domme or the greedy, grasping grabber catagory?



Yeah, you care as long as they open their wallets. Otherwise you dont give a damn and mouth off insults.
 
Browse through the domme listings on here and more than half will say something to the effect, "don't bother contacting me if you are poor." You think any real submissive is going to pay any attention to you if you have that in the profile? The "wankers" will be the only ones that will give you the time of day.

< Message edited by cyberdude611 -- 1/25/2008 1:57:21 PM >

(in reply to MistressUltimate)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Does BDSM Require Money? - 1/25/2008 2:01:54 PM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline 		My tendency would be to reply why are they so pathetic that they need to solicit random strangers for money?

Don't thay have thier own, or do they just get off on being parasites?

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to touchofeuphoria)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Does BDSM Require Money? - 1/25/2008 2:04:00 PM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cyberdude611




Yeah, you care as long as they open their wallets. Otherwise you dont give a damn and mouth off insults.
 
Browse through the domme listings on here and more than half will say something to the effect, "don't bother contacting me if you are poor." You think any real submissive is going to pay any attention to you if you have that in the profile? The "wankers" will be the only ones that will give you the time of day.


I think we just need to go through the listings and start reporting these women. It's against the TOS to ask. Just just having an ad up like that is a violation of site terms.

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to cyberdude611)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Does BDSM Require Money? - 1/25/2008 2:13:43 PM   
Politesub53


Posts: 14862
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

My tendency would be to reply why are they so pathetic that they need to solicit random strangers for money?

Don't thay have thier own, or do they just get off on being parasites?


You overlook the fact that there are two types of women asking for tribute on here. Firstly there are those that are just after a quick buck. Secondly there are those who have well equipped premises, years of experience, and offer any clients who wish to pay the chance to fulfill a fantasy. It may not be to your taste but why be so judgemental. Surely its up to everyone in this lifestyle to live it as they wish.

(in reply to Leatherist)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Does BDSM Require Money? - 1/25/2008 2:35:03 PM   
BlackPhx


Posts: 3432
Joined: 11/8/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: touchofeuphoria

I simply complimented someone for how they looked in their picture. <snip> She ended the message with how she requires a tribute of at least $10 to be her slave. <snip> and how I will never be a true slave if I can't give up control of my money. <snip> Do you think that a submissive that decides to give his mind and body up, rather than his money, cannot become a slave at all with this mentality?


If you check Master and my profile you will have a sense of what we are to each other and what we are seeking. At no point have we ever asked anyone for money, nor has Master ever asked that of me. I have my own bank account, he has his, we have our investments, home, vehicle, etc. and don't need a sub/slave to provide for us. Not to be ours. We take the time to respond to most people who write us, and will continue to do so. If we meet with someone it will be in public and while it is likely Master and I will foot the meal cost if any, we don't have a problem if the person wishes to maintain autonomy in that for the first couple of meetings. Whatever it takes for that person to feel safe and in control of their safety.

If the sub/slave desires to contribute to the household once they have become ours, and that is what it takes for them to feel good about their contribution to our happiness, then it will be discussed, and if warranted, facilitated. Their bank account is their own, though with discussion we may require that they have a second signatory on it. It depends on how deep into slavery they desire to go and how well they mesh with us.

Everyone however has their own criteria for what they seek in a slave or sub or a Dominant. If that persons demands are not in line with your needs, pass on and let the vitriol pass off your back like water on a hot skillet. Slavery isn't built in a day and definately not $10 at a time.

poenkitten

(in reply to touchofeuphoria)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Does BDSM Require Money? - 1/25/2008 2:37:29 PM   
PanthersMom


Posts: 2215
Joined: 11/26/2007
From: Cleveland Ohio
Status: offline 		it requires money if you choose to associate with professionals and pay them for their services, just like any onther profession, why should that be confusing?  you don't need to pay someone for it if you don't want to, do like alot of other folks, find someone with whom you can build a relationship and have a blast playing together.  all depends on which route you prefer to take.

PM

_____________________________

That which does not kill me, better run pretty damn fast

I miss my ex, but my aim is improving!




(in reply to Politesub53)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Does BDSM Require Money? - 1/25/2008 2:51:21 PM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Politesub53

quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

My tendency would be to reply why are they so pathetic that they need to solicit random strangers for money?

Don't thay have thier own, or do they just get off on being parasites?


You overlook the fact that there are two types of women asking for tribute on here. Firstly there are those that are just after a quick buck. Secondly there are those who have well equipped premises, years of experience, and offer any clients who wish to pay the chance to fulfill a fantasy. It may not be to your taste but why be so judgemental. Surely its up to everyone in this lifestyle to live it as they wish.


It does not matter.

A TOS violation is a TOS violation.

And it leaves one extrenmly vulnerable, as any pissed off male sub can report you for prostitution-or sick the IRS on you for doing it.

And also remember this- in a post 911 world, electronic transfers can be traced back to the account holder. And the next sub that comes knocking to pay you a "tribute", may well be an FBI agent. And if that money does not get reported,you are FUCKED-and not in good ways,

Refer to the "outed mistress" thread in alternative lifestyles in the news  section if you do not believe it cannot happen. She was here doing "business" too.

And when a crack down comes, they don't seperate wolves from sheep-they just take EVERYONE not in legal compliance.

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to Politesub53)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Does BDSM Require Money? - 1/25/2008 3:00:59 PM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: touchofeuphoria

I simply complimented someone for how they looked in their picture. Then she replied with this long message about what she looks for in a slave, blah blah blah. Anyways, the message as a whole isn't my point. She ended the message with how she requires a tribute of at least $10 to be her slave. I told her that I'm not interested in paying for this lifestyle. I'm not a cheap guy at all, I just don't believe in it..maybe a polite dinner or taking her out somewhere nice..but she clearly just wanted money. Anyways, I was polite about it and got a response of her telling me how I'm pathetic, and a fake, and how I will never be a true slave if I can't give up control of my money. Now, I don't really care about the name calling. It just strikes up some curiosity what what the majority of Doms might think about this situation. Do you think that a submissive that decides to give his mind and body up, rather than his money, cannot become a slave at all with this mentality?

this tribute aspect of male slavery is just a gender bias ....i am a slave and never had to pay for anyhing .....nor have i ever taken a man's money, for anything not even raising three unmentionables...........but well equipped dungeons and all that props scene must cost a packet....my body is the main tool of use....
mind you i did ask Master if he woukd ever sell me and He answered yes immediately....i'll keep my mouth shut if tempted to ask that one again

< Message edited by Prinsexx -- 1/25/2008 3:02:55 PM >

(in reply to touchofeuphoria)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Does BDSM Require Money? - 1/25/2008 3:07:21 PM   
azropedntied


Posts: 1829
Joined: 7/25/2005
From: Phx AZ
Status: offline 		The OP's topic question " does bdsm require money ?YES  atleast my bdsm does .Leaving the whole 10 dollar  issue and pro side outta the disscusion for a moment .What is your time worth , what do you have as far as bdsm toys/tools ?gas to get to a meeting ,class event ?admission to a ball,event or class ?Some spend more than others , me being a toy whore i have a vast collection .So in closing Yes  i do feel it does cost money just as  most things in life  do in one  form or another .i do not count the money spent only the enjoyment  gained from my life .

(in reply to Prinsexx)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Does BDSM Require Money? - 1/25/2008 3:26:37 PM   
ThundersCry


Posts: 892
Status: offline 		Only 10? -L-
 
Maybe she needed toothpaste....

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Does BDSM Require Money? - 1/25/2008 3:41:17 PM   
Politesub53


Posts: 14862
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

quote:

ORIGINAL: Politesub53

quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

My tendency would be to reply why are they so pathetic that they need to solicit random strangers for money?

Don't thay have thier own, or do they just get off on being parasites?


You overlook the fact that there are two types of women asking for tribute on here. Firstly there are those that are just after a quick buck. Secondly there are those who have well equipped premises, years of experience, and offer any clients who wish to pay the chance to fulfill a fantasy. It may not be to your taste but why be so judgemental. Surely its up to everyone in this lifestyle to live it as they wish.


It does not matter.

A TOS violation is a TOS violation.

And it leaves one extrenmly vulnerable, as any pissed off male sub can report you for prostitution-or sick the IRS on you for doing it.

And also remember this- in a post 911 world, electronic transfers can be traced back to the account holder. And the next sub that comes knocking to pay you a "tribute", may well be an FBI agent. And if that money does not get reported,you are FUCKED-and not in good ways,

Refer to the "outed mistress" thread in alternative lifestyles in the news  section if you do not believe it cannot happen. She was here doing "business" too.

And when a crack down comes, they don't seperate wolves from sheep-they just take EVERYONE not in legal compliance.


But that wasnt what you posted. I happen to agree with the above that its against the TOS. All im saying is there is a big difference between offering a service and soliciting cash as a scam.

(in reply to Leatherist)
Profile   Post #: 60
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