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RE: Did you or did you not?? Only YOU know for sure bec... - 2/5/2008 9:29:22 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: toservez
No, it is calling living in the real world and not in a fantasized cyber theory world.

Damn straight.  It sure is easy to tell who the internet-only jackoffs are.  TSZ has given some of the best advice I've seen on these boards, because she's actually in a relationship, has a job, has a life.  So she actually has real-life information to share with other people -- unlike insecure assholes whose subs have names like JPEG and GIF.

(in reply to toservez)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Did you or did you not?? Only YOU know for sure bec... - 2/5/2008 9:34:06 PM   
cautiousiasub


Posts: 199
Joined: 10/17/2005
Status: offline 		I have to agree with AquaticSub. I wouldn't lie or try to deceive. I may not follow through, and I may have a good reason for not doing so. Then again, I may not and will accept the consequences. He has absolutely no tolerance for lying, and it is the one thing that he would consider a "deal-breaker."

That, and I am a horrible liar. I have one of those faces that people can read like an open book.

< Message edited by cautiousiasub -- 2/5/2008 9:35:40 PM >

_____________________________

"If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam." - Johnny Carson

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Did you or did you not?? Only YOU know for sure bec... - 2/5/2008 11:43:45 PM   
sillyfrillyboy


Posts: 64
Joined: 1/22/2008
Status: offline 		I found this thread amusing because I recently went a month just because... well just because it was fun... I started moticing how much more emotional I was and not just in a bad way. Things that where funny where hysterical. This that where romatic would take my breath away. And ofcourse things that where sad where very sad. Everything had so much color and vibrance after a while it was amazing. No I dont do drugs or drink even :)

To answer the question. First off I am a lousy liar. I am usre that if something happened I would have to tell a Domme that something happened. I also think that if a Domme got to know me well she could easily tell if something was wrong as I wear my heart on my sleave.

So yeah I would deffinatly tell her.

(in reply to cautiousiasub)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Did you or did you not?? Only YOU know for sure bec... - 2/6/2008 6:41:42 AM   
OmegaG


Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Smith117



If that's the case, would you not communicate that to your significant other? Or would you just "laugh and walk out?"

I'll tell you this, if at any point in any of my relationships, past or future, the girl just "laughed and walked out" she would find the door locked when and if she came back. I don't play that game. The first thing I tell a girl when I meet her is "COMMUNICATE with me." The biggest relationship killer out there in today's world is lack of communication.

If you don't think you can perform or endure a task I've come up with, TELL ME. Let's talk about it. Don't just 'walk out' because that will tell me you had no interest in me to begin with nor trust in me to tell me what was on your mind, and therefore, we shouldn't be together anyway.

As a matter of fact, the girl I spoke of and I discussed that "promise" that I asked her to make. I would often as (as she was coming down from an orgasmic high) what if I took her up on it. And she said it would be tough, but if I wanted that, then it was my right as her Master and she would do her best, though it wouldn't be easy. How hard is that to say? How much of a lack of faith in your partner do you have to have to just walk out because of something they ask you to do? Is that what a submissive does? Just walk out when she hears something she doesn't like?



When we are discussing the "what ifs" based on the post by the gentleman who's decided his girl will abstain we are missing some key information, basically how willing he is to communicate with his girl if his grand expirement goes awry.

In my relationship not only am I allowed to communicate, but he generally initiates the communication when he's denied an orgasm for a couple of days, he wants to make sure that I'm not shutting down emotionally or physically and he would cease they denial immediately if it were to happen

Would I walk out of my relationship?  Hell no.  Would I walk out of a relationship where communication was lacking?  In a heart beat, and I'd never know if the locks had been changed because when I walk, I don't look back.

_____________________________


Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

(in reply to Smith117)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Did you or did you not?? Only YOU know for sure bec... - 2/6/2008 6:46:08 AM   
OmegaG


Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sillyfrillyboy

I found this thread amusing because I recently went a month just because... well just because it was fun... I started moticing how much more emotional I was and not just in a bad way. Things that where funny where hysterical. This that where romatic would take my breath away. And ofcourse things that where sad where very sad. Everything had so much color and vibrance after a while it was amazing. No I dont do drugs or drink even :)

To answer the question. First off I am a lousy liar. I am usre that if something happened I would have to tell a Domme that something happened. I also think that if a Domme got to know me well she could easily tell if something was wrong as I wear my heart on my sleave.

So yeah I would deffinatly tell her.



By the forth day I am slap happy and can't focus-- a month would result in catastrophe, and I have responsibilities that I need to have a grip on.

_____________________________


Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

(in reply to sillyfrillyboy)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Did you or did you not?? Only YOU know for sure bec... - 2/6/2008 9:43:55 AM   
daddysprop247


Posts: 1712
Joined: 6/24/2005
From: DC Metro area
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: toservez



No, it is calling living in the real world and not in a fantasized cyber theory world.

I am a slave in the real and sane world.



my apologies for veering slightly off-topic here, but i find this often reiterated point in your postings quite offensive...basically, that anyone who does not practice or believe in M/s as you feel is proper...who doesn't believe in hard limits for slaves, or that a slave should ever place her own desires or needs (even happiness) before the will of her Owner, who believe that a slave refuses a Master nothing and is not necessarily entitled to a life of joy...is not living in the "real and sane world."

my Master and i are real, everyday folk...living in the real world. from the very beginning of our union it was made crystal clear that i no longer had rights, including the right to happiness (which honestly none of us has), to have desires fulfilled or even basic needs met, and certainly not the right to terminate the relationship, or even refuse a command, much less laugh and walk away. that does not mean that i have committed to a life of misery. it simply means that when i became a slave my life stopped being about "me" and started revolving around him. this was a choice i could make without regret because i knew him, respected him, and knew we were compatible in all the areas that are most significant in life.
going back to the thread about the submissive who cannot orgasm til sometime in june, the struggle or hardship in such a scenario is difficult for me to comprehend, as it has been several years, perhaps 5 or more, since i have last orgasmed, and it may well be something that never occurs again. big whoop...that's not among the things that makes life worth living for me. if it were something i cared about, and i was not fulfilled without it...i would just view it as a sacrifice, part and parcel of being property and your life not being all about you. focus on the pleasure it brings to your Owner, that is what should keep you going and make it all worthwhile...is it not?


< Message edited by daddysprop247 -- 2/6/2008 9:44:55 AM >

(in reply to toservez)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Did you or did you not?? Only YOU know for sure bec... - 2/6/2008 10:29:07 AM   
fairerthanshe


Posts: 3035
Joined: 1/18/2007
Status: offline 		Greetings daddysprop,

I agree with you on TPE relationships - we who live in them, do live in the real and sane world and that world is defined by our Masters.  Not by anyone else.  When SJ tells me to do something, I do it.  I don't debate whether it is something I feel like doing, does it go against our 'contract' (there isn't one), is he wrong to ask it, will it humiliate me...None of those things go through my head, none of them.  Why?  Because that is not our reality.  In our reality, he is obeyed with no questions asked.  That means getting to a point where the questions aren't even asked in my head.  Its a process, it takes time - and no two enslavements are alike.  It has been much easier to reach that level with SJ than with any of my previous owners.  Thanks for sharing your story with us.

well wishes ~ fairer than she




_____________________________

The Nuclear Bomb of Awesome, rockin' the MoFo Hawk, still a bad-ass with a bouncy attitude, and spreading joy as a predator in Hello Kitty panties

Recently honored with membership in the West Coast Assholes

(in reply to daddysprop247)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Did you or did you not?? Only YOU know for sure bec... - 2/6/2008 11:30:59 AM   
Smith117


Posts: 1447
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: daddysprop247

quote:

ORIGINAL: toservez



No, it is calling living in the real world and not in a fantasized cyber theory world.

I am a slave in the real and sane world.





Very well said.

my apologies for veering slightly off-topic here, but i find this often reiterated point in your postings quite offensive...basically, that anyone who does not practice or believe in M/s as you feel is proper...who doesn't believe in hard limits for slaves, or that a slave should ever place her own desires or needs (even happiness) before the will of her Owner, who believe that a slave refuses a Master nothing and is not necessarily entitled to a life of joy...is not living in the "real and sane world."

my Master and i are real, everyday folk...living in the real world. from the very beginning of our union it was made crystal clear that i no longer had rights, including the right to happiness (which honestly none of us has), to have desires fulfilled or even basic needs met, and certainly not the right to terminate the relationship, or even refuse a command, much less laugh and walk away. that does not mean that i have committed to a life of misery. it simply means that when i became a slave my life stopped being about "me" and started revolving around him. this was a choice i could make without regret because i knew him, respected him, and knew we were compatible in all the areas that are most significant in life.
going back to the thread about the submissive who cannot orgasm til sometime in june, the struggle or hardship in such a scenario is difficult for me to comprehend, as it has been several years, perhaps 5 or more, since i have last orgasmed, and it may well be something that never occurs again. big whoop...that's not among the things that makes life worth living for me. if it were something i cared about, and i was not fulfilled without it...i would just view it as a sacrifice, part and parcel of being property and your life not being all about you. focus on the pleasure it brings to your Owner, that is what should keep you going and make it all worthwhile...is it not?


(in reply to daddysprop247)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Did you or did you not?? Only YOU know for sure bec... - 2/6/2008 11:38:07 AM   
batshalom


Posts: 1990
Joined: 9/17/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TracyTaken

I didn't mean to come across as saying that I would never lie about anything.  I am no saint.  I wouldn't lie about having an orgasm because I can't imagine the consequences would be really bad ... I just can't imagine my husband/Dom being horribly displeased over such a thing.  Okay, so we're wierd. 



Sorry Tracy, I wasn't actually responding to you - I was typing in the fast reply box and since your message was the last one at that time, it looks like my response was taking a snotty shot at you. I should have typed "fast reply." Sorry for the confusion.

(in reply to TracyTaken)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Did you or did you not?? Only YOU know for sure bec... - 2/6/2008 11:42:04 AM   
AbsitInvidia


Posts: 164
Joined: 11/23/2007
Status: offline 		Fast Reply:

What if they think you *did* but you actually didn't?  Do you say "no I didn't" if you are completely satisfied with what happened, or do you just smile and say "that was amazing"?


_____________________________

-=SixFoot and Soshi=-

What most people call rights are merely social norms, they are expectations - but expectations can and will be violated on a daily basis. On her knees. In the mud. Hard, and savagely. Expectations likes it like that.

(in reply to TracyTaken)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Did you or did you not?? Only YOU know for sure bec... - 2/6/2008 11:49:00 AM   
TracyTaken


Posts: 615
Joined: 2/1/2008
Status: offline
quote:

Sorry Tracy, I wasn't actually responding to you


That's okay.  It was nice to see someone post who was not a candidate for cannonization. 

(in reply to batshalom)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Did you or did you not?? Only YOU know for sure bec... - 2/6/2008 11:51:10 AM   
TracyTaken


Posts: 615
Joined: 2/1/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AbsitInvidia

Fast Reply:

What if they think you *did* but you actually didn't?  Do you say "no I didn't" if you are completely satisfied with what happened, or do you just smile and say "that was amazing"?


I'd say that was a perfectly appropriate lie of omission. 



(in reply to AbsitInvidia)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Did you or did you not?? Only YOU know for sure bec... - 2/6/2008 11:59:50 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

If I wanked when I wasn't supposed to, I would come clean. We would talk it and decide what to do from there.


Pfffft.... you are seriously expecting us to believe your not a messy orgasmer aqua....
 
the.dark.

_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Did you or did you not?? Only YOU know for sure bec... - 2/6/2008 12:44:33 PM   
batshalom


Posts: 1990
Joined: 9/17/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

Pfffft.... you are seriously expecting us to believe your not a messy orgasmer aqua....
 

 
Like a little puff of talcum powder - very tidy and delicate, I'm betting.

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Did you or did you not?? Only YOU know for sure bec... - 2/6/2008 12:50:21 PM   
toservez


Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: daddysprop247

quote:

ORIGINAL: toservez



No, it is calling living in the real world and not in a fantasized cyber theory world.

I am a slave in the real and sane world.



my apologies for veering slightly off-topic here, but i find this often reiterated point in your postings quite offensive...basically, that anyone who does not practice or believe in M/s as you feel is proper...who doesn't believe in hard limits for slaves, or that a slave should ever place her own desires or needs (even happiness) before the will of her Owner, who believe that a slave refuses a Master nothing and is not necessarily entitled to a life of joy...is not living in the "real and sane world."

my Master and i are real, everyday folk...living in the real world. from the very beginning of our union it was made crystal clear that i no longer had rights, including the right to happiness (which honestly none of us has), to have desires fulfilled or even basic needs met, and certainly not the right to terminate the relationship, or even refuse a command, much less laugh and walk away. that does not mean that i have committed to a life of misery. it simply means that when i became a slave my life stopped being about "me" and started revolving around him. this was a choice i could make without regret because i knew him, respected him, and knew we were compatible in all the areas that are most significant in life.
going back to the thread about the submissive who cannot orgasm til sometime in june, the struggle or hardship in such a scenario is difficult for me to comprehend, as it has been several years, perhaps 5 or more, since i have last orgasmed, and it may well be something that never occurs again. big whoop...that's not among the things that makes life worth living for me. if it were something i cared about, and i was not fulfilled without it...i would just view it as a sacrifice, part and parcel of being property and your life not being all about you. focus on the pleasure it brings to your Owner, that is what should keep you going and make it all worthwhile...is it not?



Because it is easy to write words on a computer that I have no rights, I have no limits, and will never leave even if I am miserable when you put on the whopping qualifier of my Master loves and cares for me and I love him so dearly. It is easy to write those words when your limits, which you have (anyone want to bring up the chain saw), match your Master’s. When no rights has no meaning because you are happy in the relationship and of course how could you consider leaving such a wonderful man that makes you so happy.

But people and relationships can change. His behavior or what he wants you to do could change. It could cross the line of your morals or society’s morals.

You are 100% no one has the right to be happy but, and please none of this assumption of people like me pack our bags after one incident or one bad month, if you truly think you can be miserable for years/decades so you can look in the mirror and go I have no right to leave or pursue being at least not miserable? I think that is special that you have a great relationship that you can write these things, I truly do and wish mine goes as well. But I have been in a relationship for seven years where the last two were hell. Those first five years you could of probably here me I would never leave. I thought I was no limit women based on trusting my Master until he did some things and found out that was a lie.

Saying you are a no right no limit slave that would never leave is easy and cute when your relationship works. Saying you are that when you Master orders you to do something against your morals, illegal or psychology destroys you is another. Saying you would never leave is easy when you are happy let’s see you say it when you are miserable and it drags out in years.

Saying you are a no rights no limits slave is fiction. As you yourself frequently qualify it my Master cares about me and makes me happy. That makes it conditional and hence why people like me call it cyber fantasy.

I am done defending my words as I do not want to contribute anymore to hijacking this thread. All other disagreements will be read but I will not reply out of respect to the thread. Sorry, I wasted three posts off topic.



_____________________________

I am sorry I do not fit Webster's defintion of a slave but thankfully my Master is not Webster.

"Anything that contradicts experience and logic should be abandoned." - H.H. The 14th Dalai Lama

(in reply to daddysprop247)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Did you or did you not?? Only YOU know for sure bec... - 2/6/2008 1:45:58 PM   
daddysprop247


Posts: 1712
Joined: 6/24/2005
From: DC Metro area
Status: offline 		to servez, i can respect your wish not to respond off-topic anymore in this thread, and if you wish you may respond to me privately, however you seem to have some very big misconceptions about my relationship. i have never stated that i am gloriously happy, that i live an easy life, or that my Master never demands things of me or subjects me to things which are miserable and difficult. quite the contrary, i have been very open about sharing the fact that i've certainly had my share of struggles in following this path, that at one point early on i was suicidal even, that it is no rare thing for me to suffer greatly for my Master. yes, we have a strong mutual love and affection for one another. this does not equate to a life of peaches and cream. He is very demanding, can be quite cruel and sadistic at times, and actually it is the fact that he loves me so which drives him to be so. if there were no love involved, things would actually be much simpler and easier to bear as he would not have the sadistic urges, and i would not be emotionally shattered everytime he treated me callously or subjected me to something which goes against my own ethical boundaries.

yes, it is very easy to say that one has no rights or limits when one has a pleasant and relatively easy life. however i would not fall into that category, there have certainly been times i wished i could run away or be released or just be done with the whole ball of wax, breathing and all....but i've overcome and moved on from those moments by remembering the fact that my life belongs to another, that in the grand scheme of things serving and pleasing him is all that truly matters, that he does not owe me anything. and eventually you can find a great comfort in this fact, in having a life with such a clear, black and white focus and purpose, and in the powerlessness of it all. at least for me, that has been the case. not trying to live up to some cyber-wanker fantasy, but being clear-headed and realistic and sucking it up because, that's life, you're a slave.

(in reply to toservez)
Profile   Post #: 56
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