How much changes after giving up control

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How much changes after giving up control - 7/16/2004 1:34:21 PM

lookingwithin04

Posts: 48
Joined: 7/8/2004
Status: offline

just wondering how much changes after giving up control to your online Dominant?

Do you loose the privledge of safe words?
Do you loose the privledge to stop a scene completely even if your not given a safeword, meaning if it's not something that's suppose to be painful but at the time just is?

What changes i really want to know?

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RE: How much changes after giving up control - 7/16/2004 1:50:20 PM

ScorpioMaster

Posts: 146
Joined: 3/30/2004
Status: offline

Giving up control depends on the Master and sub relationship. What did they negotiate in their contract? Since you are talking on line the one question I have to ask have you guys met in person yet and if so how many times. Has the relationship been a longs distance one were you guys get together once or twice a month? If not, I would not give some one 100% control on line until you have met in person more than once. The other thing is I know some slaves who started out with safe words and they hardly ever use them any more for they trust their Master totally. Since you have never meet in person I am assuming I would not give up your right to use your safe words until you know how this guy plays and if he is safe, sane, and consensual (SSC). To sign over your Money or life to some one you have never meet in person is not a very wise move.

One more thing I want to add remember this is the internet and until you two meet in person do not get to heavy into it. There are too many predators and wanabes who play games on line. Some of them are abusers and they will try to isolate you from real people. Get out and find the nearest munches in your area and start attend them. That is what I did and I got some great friendsGood luck Kevin

< Message edited by ScorpioMaster -- 7/16/2004 2:02:58 PM >

(in reply to lookingwithin04)

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RE: How much changes after giving up control - 7/16/2004 1:52:24 PM

sub4hire

Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

I've never really had an online Dominant. I've known people I consider to be Dominant online. Those people, well they always remained the same as they always were.
Never given up control so I cannot answer that.

However, in a real life situation. When I've given my submission to my Dominant. Nothing changes for me other than I feel more secure while with him. Happier overall.

I still have safe words. Although I can't say as though I've ever used one. A safeword depends on both people involved. If they have mutual respect for one another to honor one. So, the answer would differ from person to person. Are they the type to honor safewords in the first place? Myself if they told me no, I'd be searching still. A sub just needs to feel safe.

Although, you also should not top from the bottom. Meaning trying to control your Dominant just so you get what you want. Once you submit you are telling the Dominant you have trust in them. Ultimate trust. You are essentially giving them your life. Everything has already been talked out. The rules are clear. Many Dominants choose to push the submissives. Do you trust the Dominant enough to be pushed?
For instance when I was searching I got a lot of people telling me. How I'd be their submissive and greet them at the door in a certain position. Etc..etc. To me this was ludicrous. For some it would be what they wanted.
If I had chosen a person like that I would have had to have had the right amount of trust that they didn't bring their family through the door as I was sitting there on a normal day. Or friends...supervisors or what have you.
I know I'm getting a bit off track. Your post reminded me of those days of what I considered the truly clueless dom online.
Although, what works for me may never work for you. So be true unto yourself.

(in reply to lookingwithin04)

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RE: How much changes after giving up control - 7/17/2004 4:31:28 PM

lookingwithin04

Posts: 48
Joined: 7/8/2004
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actually to clear this up my Master and i have met, we have been together several times infact and i have never once felt unsafe with Him, i completely trust Him, i was just wondering how much more extreme things would be, how much less i would be allowed to do. I just have a few questions that's all...

what really changes after you give up control to a Dom?

That's the basic one

thanks

(in reply to sub4hire)

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RE: How much changes after giving up control - 7/17/2004 4:43:48 PM

SherriA

Posts: 544
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: lookingwithin04

what really changes after you give up control to a Dom?

As much or as little as the two of you decide will change.

_____________________________

-- Sherri

Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity.

(in reply to lookingwithin04)

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RE: How much changes after giving up control - 7/17/2004 5:28:56 PM

pixieunleashed

Posts: 105
Joined: 7/11/2004
Status: offline

*answered this in the "ask a submissive/slave" forum....:)

pixie

_____________________________

**please note that I realize that I am just as full of crap as everybody else, feel free to remind me anytime**

If you understand it.......you've missed the point.

[image]http://img33.exs.cx/img33/2424/pixieunleashed-2.jpg[/image]

(in reply to lookingwithin04)

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