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A dom inquiring about new ideas - 3/25/2008 1:29:11 PM   
kinkycouple01


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I am a dom and I love it, I am in a long time relationship and although I know my slave loves worshipping me, I feel like I can do more as a mistress to make things even more delightful for each of us. My ? does anyone have any really naughty ideas  to help me spice things up a bit, any advice? I am really interested in learning more about mental bondage and humiliation.
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RE: A dom inquiring about new ideas - 3/25/2008 3:56:44 PM   
LadyPact


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For those keeping score.......

Young, and not especially helping the age bracket.


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The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to MissHarlet)
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RE: A dom inquiring about new ideas - 3/25/2008 4:04:51 PM   
kinkycouple01


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I know that we are young, and I know that it is about more than his cock and my pussy, I also know what I get turned on by and so does he and this is it. We are already in college so we are a little past prom, Thank you for your advice and constructive criticism.

(in reply to Sylverdawn)
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RE: A dom inquiring about new ideas - 3/25/2008 4:15:15 PM   
Semos


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There seems to be a bit of a contradiction here.  In your profile you characterize yourself as being an expert at role playing and at your age there is no doubt in my mind you are.  Unfortunately, just breaking from the cacoon of adolesence, you are still plagued with the standards others have inflicted you with such as parent, aunt, uncles, teachers and mybe even siblings or piers.  Your internal creativity has already brought you to this site, so just let it go, experiment.  So long as both are sharing honestly, these experiments will probably give you better insight into one another and possibly be a lot of fun while your doing it. Advice from others may be of some value, but at times it can hinder your own.

PS: I just thought I would qualify that I wasn't implying parents, aunts, uncles and teacher had anything to do with your kink, but rather you probably have been somewhat moulded by thier moral standards, some of which might be good or bad.


< Message edited by Semos -- 3/25/2008 4:18:31 PM >

(in reply to kinkycouple01)
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RE: A dom inquiring about new ideas - 3/25/2008 4:19:53 PM   
AAkasha


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A section from a post I did earlier about this subject:

3) Accept and really BELIEVE this one very important truth about female domination: If your man really wants to submit to you (and he is not just a fetishist; trust me, he will know the difference if he has done his homework and he can be honest with you), you only have ONE thing to accomplish and do right. Just ONE thing! All the rest is gravy, and all the rest will fall into place for you once you accomplish this one thing.

That one thing is this: Enjoy yourself and own your pleasure. That's IT. It sounds easier than it is, because it requires that two things happen - #1 and #2 above - you have to have a man who doesn't put expectations on you, and you have to give up those preconceived ideas about what female domination is. Those both are harder than you may think. When you start feeling uncertain, icky, uncomfortable, or resistant to the idea of dominating your man, it's because #1 is messing with your self confidence by putting expectations on you, or #2 you are putting expectations on yourself (both related to the above, as you can see).

4) Take control. Play. Frolic. Delight in his reactions and soak them in. This is the only "action" step in that it requires you to "do" something to your man. But instead of giving a laundry list, instead of pointing you to books or "how to tie your man up" or "buy these toys" or "pretend you are a person you are not" I will say simply - take control, frolic, and delight in his reactions.

Snap your fingers and say "Kiss me here. No, right HERE." and when he does it, smile. Adopt a sense of unpredictability - the mystery and uncertainty will play tricks with his mind and put him in that place that he needs to be. He wants to be submissive; trust me, he will GO there, with just the slightest NUDGE from you. So many women are trying to use a jackhammer to accomplish a task that requires a flick of her fingers. Look him in the eyes, give him a command (that is directly related to your pleasure) and watch him follow through. Tell him to give you an orgasm. Direct his position during lovemaking. Pull his hair playfully, give him a swat on the butt and smile mischievously; do all the little, minor things that come more natural and with ease, and just watch how he reacts. Marvel in how you can push his buttons just by adopting a more selfish, and self serving, self-pleasing demeanor.



Akasha


< Message edited by AAkasha -- 3/25/2008 4:20:14 PM >


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(in reply to kinkycouple01)
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RE: A dom inquiring about new ideas - 3/25/2008 4:27:23 PM   
Semos


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quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha
adopting a more selfish, and self serving, self-pleasing demeanor.


Can't get any simpler than that.

(in reply to AAkasha)
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RE: A dom inquiring about new ideas - 3/25/2008 4:58:55 PM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
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Hello and welcome to the boards.
My advice is to purchase some hands on books Like Screw the roses, send me the thorns and The loving Dominant (which has some cool scenarios in).
Another good idea is to get out and about to some clubs and see what is going on or attend a local munch.


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love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to kinkycouple01)
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RE: A dom inquiring about new ideas - 3/25/2008 5:07:56 PM   
JohnWarren


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From: Delray Beach, FL
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

Hello and welcome to the boards.
My advice is to purchase some hands on books Like Screw the roses, send me the thorns and The loving Dominant (which has some cool scenarios in).
Another good idea is to get out and about to some clubs and see what is going on or attend a local munch.


 
Normally, I keep my ego in check when this subject comes up, but I thought I'd mention that there is a companion work for The Loving Dominant (the third edition of which has come out.).  That book is Safe, Sane, Consensual and Fun.  It consists entirely of do-able scenario in a fiction format with marginal notes helping the reader recreate them in relative safety.



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(in reply to RCdc)
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RE: A dom inquiring about new ideas - 3/25/2008 5:19:37 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
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Might I say, John, shameless plug for the book, though I'm sure I'll be buying it anyway.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to JohnWarren)
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RE: A dom inquiring about new ideas - 3/25/2008 7:11:27 PM   
readyfill


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Something my Mistress did with me that changed my whole life and thinking about serving my Mistress.....she toilet trained me.  It was something new and blew me away when she told me my next traing area, but after serving her this way, I liked it and looked forward to her saying, It's time to eat or drink.............don't knock it till you try it with your slave, it's total submission on his part.

(in reply to LadyPact)
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RE: A dom inquiring about new ideas - 3/25/2008 8:18:47 PM   
JohnWarren


Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Might I say, John, shameless plug for the book, though I'm sure I'll be buying it anyway.


There is a synonym for "modest author."  It's "unpublished". [grin]



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www.lovingdominant.org

(in reply to LadyPact)
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RE: A dom inquiring about new ideas - 3/25/2008 8:25:40 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
Terribly good to see that your sense of humor is in tact.  I completely admit that is the pull for Me within your books. 

My best wishes to you, and to yours.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to JohnWarren)
Profile   Post #: 12
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