Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (Full Version)

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mya75 -> Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (5/2/2008 6:41:35 PM)

Lately I have come across a few Dominants who ask the same questions
When is the last time you were with a Dom or had sex?
When I reply Oct 07... they immediately assume something is wrong with me or that I dont have a high sex drive or cant get a man ....I'm just curious do other subs/slaves abstain from sex when not in a "relationship"....Im sure you do I am more curious to see how many....and if you have the same responses to your "lack of sexual play"



YourhandMyAss -> RE: Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (5/2/2008 6:43:52 PM)

No. I do not abstain from sex when I am single. In fact I seek out bdsm play and sexual stimulus MORE when I am single.
quote:

ORIGINAL: mya75

I'm just curious do other subs/slaves abstain from sex when not in a "relationship"....Im sure you do I am more curious to see how many....and if you have the same responses to your "lack of sexual play"




batshalom -> RE: Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (5/2/2008 6:45:10 PM)

I absolutely abstain when not in a relationship. I never ever ever ever do casual, and I figure anyone who uses the shame tactic you mentioned above is only trying to get some no-strings fuckin' (which seems, to me, a grave weakness in someone who is supposed to be a Dom).



abcbsex -> RE: Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (5/2/2008 6:56:23 PM)

I don't understand why that would be such a problem for them.. I mean, I've been with limited men in my life but Alpha can still call me a little slut... it's not like I had to go out and earn the title before he'd take me as such!



Quivver -> RE: Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (5/2/2008 7:50:53 PM)

I'm real hardwired for one and being damn picky takes finding one time consuming. 
Needless to say, I've been long periods of time only having sex with myself.  [sm=dunno.gif]
But somehow figure that answer would be seen as a Sam...... he heee hee



batshalom -> RE: Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (5/2/2008 8:03:43 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: abcbsex

I don't understand why that would be such a problem for them.. I mean, I've been with limited men in my life but Alpha can still call me a little slut... it's not like I had to go out and earn the title before he'd take me as such!


Whoops. Let me restate. I just now reread what I wrote. Duh. It says something I totally didn't mean it to say.

What I mean is that I see it as a weakness if he can't think of another way to get in my pants other than trying to make me feel defective for abstaining. In fact, it gives me one of those "Pfffffffffttttt, wtf-ev, bro!" attitudes.



DiurnalVampire -> RE: Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (5/2/2008 8:08:39 PM)

Hell, I have a slave who abstains from sex eve though he IS in a relationship. Angel is still a virgin and we have been together 2 years. Preferences... I prefer someone who doesnt sleep with everything that moves. I want my slut to be MY slut, not everyone's slut. 
DV



mya75 -> RE: Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (5/2/2008 9:55:39 PM)

thank you all for your comments 



xxblushesxx -> RE: Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (5/2/2008 9:58:47 PM)

Hello;

I was celibate for two years right before I met HM. (but there was one master right before him) but, I would have been insulted if someone had intimated that there was something wrong with me because I didn't screw some other guys....



LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (5/2/2008 10:12:49 PM)

Most kinky people tend to want and get as much sex as they can, although often they need to couch it in romantic courtships based on vanilla standards to justify it.



Lynnxz -> RE: Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (5/2/2008 10:19:42 PM)

I haven't had sex in about 6 months now... and honestly, that 6 month thing was pretty much a waste of time and effort.

I used to be a little slutty... would go out and party my ass off and end up in bed for some mediocre sex that left me counting the cracks in the ceiling and trying to remember song lyrics. Thankfully, I grew out of that crap pretty fast... I tell friends my age I got all of my stupidity out when I was younger.. time to grow the f up now.

Random sex does nothing for me. At all. At best, I get all paranoid and go running off to get tested. I don't need that stress, I don't need retards calling me up for a bootie call.. even though I still get that... wtf, and I don't want drama.
Until I get in a serious, devoted relationship again, I seriously doubt I'll have sex again.

Now... giving head?? Entirely different matter somehow. [>:] You know how some people have fuck buddies...? Haha, I have a head-buddy. >.< Giving only though, can't stand recieving.

I also "play" a lot. I've got several people that I'll do BDSM scene type of things all the time with, but there's never any sex involved.

I am odd apparently. O wells.



Leatherist -> RE: Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (5/2/2008 10:25:19 PM)

It's not just subs. I haven't had sex since I broke up with my last sub about three years ago. Casual sex is pretty lame, I just can't get into it.



YourhandMyAss -> RE: Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (5/2/2008 10:44:58 PM)

Actually I care very very little for sex, and I am indeed kinky. I can and quite happily do go 7 or 8 months with out being fucked.

However I am not happy to go months and months with out spankings, or floggings or other play that falls under the umbrella of bdsm.
quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

Most kinky people tend to want and get as much sex as they can, although often they need to couch it in romantic courtships based on vanilla standards to justify it.



YourhandMyAss -> RE: Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (5/2/2008 10:47:24 PM)

Just remember you can still get diseases and STD's from oral sex, and bodily fluid just as well as you can from vaginal sex.
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

I haven't had sex in about 6 months now... and honestly, that 6 month thing was pretty much a waste of time and effort.

I used to be a little slutty... would go out and party my ass off and end up in bed for some mediocre sex that left me counting the cracks in the ceiling and trying to remember song lyrics. Thankfully, I grew out of that crap pretty fast... I tell friends my age I got all of my stupidity out when I was younger.. time to grow the f up now.

Random sex does nothing for me. At all. At best, I get all paranoid and go running off to get tested. Now... giving head?? Entirely different matter somehow. [>:] You know how some people have fuck buddies...? Haha, I have a head-buddy. >.< Giving only though, can't stand recieving.

I also "play" a lot. I've got several people that I'll do BDSM scene type of things all the time with, but there's never any sex involved.

I am odd apparently. O wells.



xxblushesxx -> RE: Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (5/2/2008 11:04:30 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

Most kinky people tend to want and get as much sex as they can, although often they need to couch it in romantic courtships based on vanilla standards to justify it.


Why? Perhaps sometimes people just want to feel more of a connection when sharing such intimate things.
I'm not implying that's necessary, but that doesn't mean that those people are deceiving themselves any more than those who believe that sex is just an act.



Leatherist -> RE: Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (5/2/2008 11:08:50 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

Most kinky people tend to want and get as much sex as they can, although often they need to couch it in romantic courtships based on vanilla standards to justify it.


most = LA [:D]



Lynnxz -> RE: Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (5/2/2008 11:08:57 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourhandMyAss

Just remember you can still get diseases and STD's from oral sex, and bodily fluid just as well as you can from vaginal sex.


Yuppers, only do that with one guy.. and I know he's good. ^_^

I'm so paranoid about STD's it's not even funny.  [>:]



MasterFireMaam -> RE: Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (5/2/2008 11:40:44 PM)

Hell, I knew a Dominant who didn't have sex for over a year...and she had a collared submissive that was willing. It's personal choice. Some people don't get that part...and assume that because they couldn't/wouldn't do it, others shouldn't either.

Master Fire



azropedntied -> RE: Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (5/3/2008 1:49:39 AM)

I have not had sex in so long  i may have forgotten how .Its not by my choice its just the way it is .



MadameXTC -> RE: Submissives & Slaves who Abstain From Sex (5/3/2008 1:56:39 AM)

for me sex and bdsm can be two seperate things.. of course kinky sex is the greatest.. but I have had to go periods without sex due to being seperated from my Dominant. I have went periods before my Dominant without sex just cause I can seperate my need for BDSM and my need for sex. I can have a wonderfully sexually charged scene that goes deeper then penetration could ever touch. Anyone else out there who thinks bdsm is sexually charged enough to skip the sex?



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