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RE: Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say: - 5/24/2008 11:36:37 PM

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Having once been married to a Redneck I could relate to just about every bit of this thread!

The ex did actually say:

"I stocked up on ketchup and napkins while I was at the Mac Donald's - no need to buy any."

Yes, he was serious - I've never seen so many ketchup packets at one time before! And make sure you place the emphasis on MAC when you say the name of that dining establishment!

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RE: Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say: - 5/24/2008 11:51:26 PM

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Tap, you beat me to it GRRRRRRR.

I was going to say, the coup de etat :

Hold the ketchup.

T

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RE: Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say: - 5/25/2008 1:07:51 AM

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1. Okay honey, I won't go hunting in our front yard.
2. Finance a tattoo? That's ridiculous!
3. [middle of the night] I don't need shoes and a flashlight just to go to the bathroom.
4. Beer? eww tastes like pee.
5. Did I meet my girlfriend at the family social?! OMG, that's sick!

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RE: Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say: - 5/25/2008 8:00:14 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: rubberpet

Here's a few more things you'll never hear a redneck say:

1.    Hand me my toothbrush.
2.    I like the scent of deodorant.
3.   Camoflage is not a color.
4.    I graduated high school.
5.   Roadkill is NOT dinner.
6.    Stop doing that to your sister! What's wrong with you!?
7.    I love my wife more than my hunting dog.
8.    A pick-up truck is not a Country Cadillac.
9.    Commercial fishing does not include dynamite.
10. My idea of light reading is reading "The Grapes of Wrath".

hmmm... should I say something?.... nah *takes finger off the button*

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RE: Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say: - 7/26/2008 12:10:30 PM

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How about... I'm not goin in there, it stinks!

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RE: Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say: - 7/26/2008 1:00:03 PM

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As a bonafied redneck myself:

1) You can't fry that!!!

2) What would Martha Stewart say?

3) Do these stretchpants make my butt look big?

4) Hell no i don't need a smoke, can't you see i'm holding Jr.?

5) That boy's just got too many dang names.

6) Naw, i'm more of a cat person.

7) Honey, don'r use the tongs to scratch there?

8) We're going green, check out my new hybrid tractor!

9) There are just too many Chevy Nova's on the road. (replace with Camaro, or T-Bird or whatever it is in where you're at; but in Meriwether County, Georgia every man and his cousin had a Nova).

10) No boy, you're not getting that Ford F-100; look at this Daihatsu here.

11) Maw, i think you used too much gravy this time.

12) "Redneck" is just not politically correct.

13) Bubba, ain't you got no sensitivity? Starin' at her melons like that's gotta make a girl uncomfortable.

14) White leather Sis? You look like one of them prostitutes.

15) Sorry, i can't make it to the bar; i've got an appointment to get my hair and nails.

16) These jeans are too greasy to wear out.

17) Those boots are done for, i should toss them and get a new pair.

I could go one forever, lol.

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RE: Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say: - 7/26/2008 10:38:29 PM

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snort gag* ok.. put drink down before reading anything in the humor forum... oh god now my monitor has koolaid on it... damn it.

H >:)

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RE: Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say: - 7/26/2008 11:02:00 PM

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So how many of those have to apply to me before I am officially a redneck?

There are quite a few things on that list you will never hear pass my lips.

Oh and one more comment.

quote:

1. Hand me my toothbrush.

The toothbrush had to be invented by a redneck, otherwise it would be called a teethbrush.

Just sayin,
Thadius

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RE: Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say: - 7/27/2008 1:28:21 AM

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If I take train the F train to midtown, where do I connect with the D train to Brooklyn?

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RE: Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say: - 7/27/2008 1:33:25 AM

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Hehe I use to live in Tenn. and met some of the coolest people there ... but some of the stuff they said drove me batty... A bartender friend of mine use to say she would get drunker than Kooty Brown... and She use to tell her patrons that they were being red necks cause deer urine wasn't a cologne....

Peace

Angelic

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RE: Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say: - 7/27/2008 1:46:30 AM

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#9.

Made of win.

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RE: Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say: - 7/27/2008 3:55:14 AM

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Camus was right.

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RE: Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say: - 7/27/2008 10:50:10 AM

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We got enough beer.

T

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RE: Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say: - 7/27/2008 10:55:41 AM

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Please pass the brie.

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RE: Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say: - 7/27/2008 11:08:08 AM

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thought of another one.

do you think my hairs to big?

H >:)

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RE: Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say: - 7/27/2008 11:10:37 AM

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Cool! I'm an ACLU member too.

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RE: Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say: - 7/27/2008 11:11:15 AM

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LMAO

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RE: Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say: - 7/27/2008 12:24:37 PM

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13 times 12 = 156

I Tivo'd Dancin with the Stars

The North won

A commencement speech

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RE: Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say: - 7/28/2008 7:11:00 AM

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What did you get for #27 on the nuclear physics test?

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RE: Things You'll Never Hear a Redneck Say: - 7/28/2008 6:59:56 PM

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LOL...

Why'd you put hot sauce on that?

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