Zombie Law! (Full Version)

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HeavansKeeper -> Zombie Law! (7/20/2008 3:37:50 AM)

I love the concept and myths of zombies.  I think any fan of the undead should have a set of general facts about them.  Here are some facts I believe about zombies, if I do believe in zombies: (Yea... I thought it through)

Zombism is a virus.
People only become zombies after they're dead.
Fluid transmission while still alive causes zombism.
The Zombism virus is transferred contaminated drinking water.
People remain dead for ~1-5 minutes before re-animation.
Zombies do not require food, but only know to feed.
Zombies do not have a hive mind.
Zombies can travel up and down stairs.
Zombies can only open doors the way a dog would.
Zombies move slower than humans, usually.  i.e. they don't sprint.  They attack faster than they walk.
For locomotion, zombies require intact muscle and bones.
The only way to kill a zombie is to destroy the brain.
Reanimated skeletons are not zombies.
Zombies cannot operate complicated machinery like cars, cranes, guns, or locks.
Zombies are not fooled by you walking like a zombie.
Zombies sense heart rate, but are otherwise deaf.
Zombies are not blind, but have limited vision.
Zombies feel no pain and know no fear.
Zombies will not attack each other.
Zombies do not engage in teamwork.  Sometimes they all have the same goal and will become piled in an attempt to reach elevated food.
Zombies will eat non-human mammals, but rarely sense anything smaller than a medium sized dog.
Zombies are immune to faith based symbols as a defense.

I'm not sure how long reanimated corpses last.  Maybe a week, maybe 666 years?
I'm not sure if zombies float or not.  If they float, they should be able to doggy paddle.  If they sink, they walk on the bottom of the body of water.

Sooo... Yeah... It's 6:40 AM and I'm bored and not tired yet...  This is what you get.  Any thoughts?  There will be a pop quiz this week.



Rumtiger -> RE: Zombie Law! (7/20/2008 3:55:37 AM)

Figures I would be the one whose awake and just happens to see this.

The reanimated corpses would only last as long as they decompose, this would mean zombies in certian regions (taundra, desert) would last longer then zombies in more humid regions of the world like jungles or wetlands which speed up the decomposition process. In some caes the virus which causes zombisim may or may not serve to slow this process down.

As a zombie no longer uses it's lungs (or any other organ save for the brain) It would either sink in water or depending on other bodily gases (methane ect) perhaps have a slight measure of bouyancy, but otherwise thier bottom walkers.

Zombies have exceptional hearing and smell due to focus being put off from typical bodily functions and instead being diverted to certian senses, for this reason it is not advised to go zombie hunting or exploring at night.

Edited to add:

Typically the virus is not waterborne or airborne, it is ussaly present in a single individual who spreads it to others through fluid contact (infected blood, open wounds ect.) The virus is specific to human DNA however, so animals cannot become infected.



seababy -> RE: Zombie Law! (7/20/2008 5:25:50 AM)

http://www.l4d.com/info.html

I cant wait for this to be released

And yep zombies virus is passed on by bodily fluids

Most effective weapon? Flame thrower!!!




LondonArt -> RE: Zombie Law! (7/20/2008 6:28:09 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: seababy

Most effective weapon? Flame thrower!!!




Because the only thing better than being chased by a zombie is being chased by a zombie that's on fire, while you carry a huge heavy tank of explosive material on your back. When zombies invade, I'm definitely not joining your group of survivors.



kittinSol -> RE: Zombie Law! (7/20/2008 6:39:57 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LondonArt

When zombies invade <snip>



They already have: who do you think invented Walmart and Mickey D's?



DomAviator -> RE: Zombie Law! (7/20/2008 6:41:35 AM)

Actually, (and this shows some people take shit waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay to seriously and have way too much time on their hands. There is already a definitive treatise on Zombie attack survival  http://www.randomhouse.com/crown/zombiesurvivalguide/

However, he seems to be focused on the Romero zombies whereas I am expecting the 28 Days later variety... I mean lets get real here folks, the dead coming out of their graves due to some comet of something is bad, but something involving the presence of blood on a 28 day cycle is WAY more likely to make your life a living unbearable hell. [:D]



seababy -> RE: Zombie Law! (7/20/2008 6:44:18 AM)



[/quote]

Because the only thing better than being chased by a zombie is being chased by a zombie that's on fire, while you carry a huge heavy tank of explosive material on your back. When zombies invade, I'm definitely not joining your group of survivors.

[/quote]

Damn I was planning on YOU carrying it for me..Im justa girl!  : )
By the way I'm assuming the non running kind of zombie. Plenty of time to light them up! Flamethrower and classic lp records used like ninja stars.



seababy -> RE: Zombie Law! (7/20/2008 6:46:21 AM)

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DomAviator

Actually, (and this shows some people take shit waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay to seriously and have way too much time on their hands. There is already a definitive treatise on Zombie attack survival  http://www.randomhouse.com/crown/zombiesurvivalguide/

However, he seems to be focused on the Romero zombies whereas I am expecting the 28 Days later variety... I mean lets get real here folks, the dead coming out of their graves due to some comet of something is bad, but something involving the presence of blood on a 28 day cycle is WAY more likely to make your life a living unbearable hell. [:D]


I have that book and the Survive a robot invasion! 



MisterBeast -> RE: Zombie Law! (7/20/2008 7:08:56 AM)

I am so ready for the zombies, where dey at?.. http://a246.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/55/l_77e5c72f1ee2416e7110183cd8b0db75.jpg



crawlsintoyou -> RE: Zombie Law! (7/20/2008 11:53:57 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rumtiger
Typically the virus is not waterborne or airborne, it is ussaly present in a single individual who spreads it to others through fluid contact (infected blood, open wounds ect.) The virus is specific to human DNA however, so animals cannot become infected.


There *were* those wolves in the DeadWorld comic book, "The Dire Wolves"...




faerytattoodgirl -> RE: Zombie Law! (7/20/2008 11:56:17 AM)

watched grindhouse again did ya?



crawlsintoyou -> RE: Zombie Law! (7/20/2008 12:05:20 PM)

As to whether or not zombies could operate complicated machinery, let's not forget Bub, who *was* (re)learning how to shoot a gun, use a telephone, and groove to a walkman.
There's also the zombies in Return of the Living Dead; now THEY were resourceful! Using tools, a radio, *and* calling for backup! (c'mon, show some love for Tar-Man)
And while zombies might not be fooled by you walking like a zombie, the Body Snatchers *can* be fooled by you walking like a Body Snatcher. At least temporarily.
(it has just occurred to me that this post has started going downhill; a sign that I've had a little too much coffee...)




Termyn8or -> RE: Zombie Law! (7/20/2008 12:33:15 PM)

And I thought I was off the wall.

Now what was that other movie ? "With a shotgun, a chainsaw and an Oldsmobile". Something like that, Army of the dead or something ? Their leader would try to say "Sally forth" and his lower jaw would fall off.

I thought it was hilarious, but I can't remember the name.

T



RCdc -> RE: Zombie Law! (7/20/2008 12:45:31 PM)

Lazerus and Jesus.
The original zombies.
 
the.dark.



DesFIP -> RE: Zombie Law! (7/20/2008 1:26:10 PM)

Discworld zombies do not operate this way. Nor do the ones in the Ankta Blake, Vampire Executioner books. Are these B movie zombie rules?



favesclava -> RE: Zombie Law! (7/20/2008 2:43:40 PM)

Army of Darkness . i love the part when he tells the locals about his boomstick. made in Grand Rapids ,Michigan. ( current hometown)



seababy -> RE: Zombie Law! (7/20/2008 3:01:23 PM)



Are we actually getting down to a discussion on what is a "twue" zombie? Cause I think we are. :)

We need to classify the two (or more?) different types.

Eg: Zombie type "A"  Slow moving, no real intelligence.
Zombie type "B" Can Sprint like a human and is at least as smart as your average pet dog.





faerytattoodgirl -> RE: Zombie Law! (7/20/2008 3:10:21 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Termyn8or

And I thought I was off the wall.

Now what was that other movie ? "With a shotgun, a chainsaw and an Oldsmobile". Something like that, Army of the dead or something ? Their leader would try to say "Sally forth" and his lower jaw would fall off.

I thought it was hilarious, but I can't remember the name.

T


you gotta rent grindhouse planet terror....near the end the girl that got her leg bit right off gets a machine gun attatched to her leg and she stands on one foot using that machine gun....kick ass.

army of darkness is part of a 5 part movie series.



spinninsweetness -> RE: Zombie Law! (7/20/2008 3:39:01 PM)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bQGVCJOVQl4

The ultimate, ultimate zombie scene from a film. Yes. Watch it.



seababy -> RE: Zombie Law! (7/20/2008 4:04:41 PM)

My favorites,

Shaun of the dead
Black Sheep



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