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CallaFirestormBW -> RE: Why is it important a submiisive be reliable? (8/5/2008 4:25:34 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Zaraseeks
It seems a lot of people are thinking more a long the ;ines of being somewhere at a certain time, ect, i am thinking more carrying out assignments, all dutys of being submissive. why is it important to count on your submissive, and subs, why is it important your doms count on you?
I believe that I -did- address this earlier in my post (though chronic lateness is often one of the first signs of unreliability). If my servant has promised to obey me, and I assign hir a task based on my understanding of that promise (which is inherent in hir accepting of our relationship), and if xhe does not complete that task, it tells me that xhe has no respect for the "rule of law" in our relationship, which is that I give instruction and xhe obeys -- very simple. I am counting on hir to do what xhe says that xhe will do. Beyond anyone else who might be inconvenienced by hir failure to follow through, to -me- it is tantamount to saying that xhe lied about hir intention in getting into a relationship with me. Xhe has proven hirself to be dishonest, and I cannot trust hir to keep hir word.
On a purely practical level, here's a relevant example of the ripples of complication that can come from a simple "forgetting" to arrange a pickup from the UPS office when xhe's promised.
Let's presume that I, as an author, have invested several months in a manuscript that I have just completed. It is "under deadline", meaning that it has to be to my editor at a certain time in order to fit into the window that she has available for reading my work, so that it can go to press on time. I have pushed myself to make sure that there is plenty of time for it to be mailed to the editor, but there is, again, a limited time-frame in which to make sure that the completed manuscript gets to where it needs to be. I assign my servant to make sure that the book is posted on time, and I go off to work with the understanding that that has been done. Flash forward several days and I get a call from my editor -- it is a full day past the deadline and the manuscript has not arrived. My editor wants to know what happened. I assure my editor that it was sent off, and check the folder that my servant knows to put the printout from the UPS site in to get the tracking number so I can give it to my editor.... When I look in the shipping folder for the manuscript there is no printout of the and "OOPS" the servant forgot. Now, I look like an idiot who can't keep track of my business to my editor. My editor has been inconvenienced or, for my more hard-ass editor, I've completely missed the deadline and xhe won't read my manuscript at all until her next window -- which may be months away, which means that I won't find out if they're buying it -- sometimes for six months or more. Now, something that I'd semi-planned on once the manuscript sold has to be put on hold.
Take the same scenario above when talking about a medical article abstract that has a concrete deadline to qualify for presentation at a convention... if it doesn't happen, it's possible that we would get "scooped" on our research, meaning that years of grant money would never make it to our lab, our department and our institution. Being on "soft" money (meaning that salaries are grant-dependant... no grant money, no salary), this could mean the difference between me -having- a job and losing my job... and not only -my- job, but all the other jobs that are depending on that grant.
I make -sure- these things don't happen when they are my responsibility... and if I delegate and my servant lets me down, xhe not only lets -me- down, xhe lets down everyone who was in that chain of reliability that was broken -- and also makes me look irresponsible.
On a less panoramic scale, if I've asked my servant to make sure the dishes are done, and I come home from work and find that there is a sink full of dishes still (or that, at 6 pm xhe's just -starting- the dishes), that means that I don't have a clean kitchen to fix a meal -- I'm tired and cranky and so is my Darling, and, instead of a healthy, home-made meal, I end up having to clean and figure out how to feed us. Needless to say, the inconvenience is sufficient that I will probably not bother to waste my time on someone who makes -more- work for me instead of less.
I have to say that this is a common-sense matter -- it is surprising to me that you can't grasp from earlier examples why this is important, regardless of what examples were given. If you genuinely can't comprehend why being late (unreliable) or not finishing a task (unreliable) are both signs of unreliability then I suspect that there may be deeper issues to contend with.
Calla Firestorm
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