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help learning to be a master - 9/10/2008 1:09:23 PM

your2bmine

Posts: 2
Joined: 9/1/2008
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Well, Have been seeking ways to be a good master. Have been having fantasies about it so time to learn. How does one start?
Got a set of ankle and wrist bracelets, blindfold and now what's next other than a partner. What mixtures of pain and pleasure work best?
Appreciatte the help.

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RE: help learning to be a master - 9/10/2008 1:41:32 PM

SageFemmexx

Posts: 240
Joined: 1/2/2007
Status: offline

Being a master has nothing to do with toys. I think you need to go back to BD/SM 101 and start reading.

Sage.

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RE: help learning to be a master - 9/10/2008 2:10:08 PM

kinkypuppy2

Posts: 345
Joined: 11/4/2007
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get involved with local community seek out a reputable person and askthem to mentor you

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See nic "Kinkypupper" also as "slvseeker" As I cannot reply to any posts or log into collarchat under that name I had to create this profile.

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RE: help learning to be a master - 9/10/2008 2:14:02 PM

leashhand

Posts: 2
Joined: 9/10/2008
From: Bath, UK
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Trawl the net, look at the resource sites, read all the books you can get your hands on, talk to as many people as you can. DONT sit and ask one question and expect all the answers - thats not dominance its laziness and arrogance. The very term Master implies that it is being used to describe someone who has spent a lot of time and effort getting to the position they are at.

I havent been involved in the scene for long, but in my 'limited' experience you will work harder than any sub or slave to understand them and their needs, to improve your own self discipline, your own skills. As for being a 'good' one - that depends on the other person involved and their opinion, it's not you that decides if youre good.....Same for the pain/pleasure - talk to the one youre about to inflict it upon.

All I can say is do your research, thoroughly, understand it, know all you can about everyone involved (including, no, especially yourself) and be prepared to work harder than you ever have before, and I dont mean getting your swinging arm all built up.....

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RE: help learning to be a master - 9/10/2008 2:20:54 PM

skeletoncrew

Posts: 17
Joined: 7/5/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: your2bmine

Well, Have been seeking ways to be a good master. Have been having fantasies about it so time to learn. How does one start?

i think the best way to learn is research, research, research there are many fine forums like this one, bondage.com, and probably others...there are also many good books written about the subject go to amazon.com and put in "BDSM" and see what looks good for you...there are also chatrooms and interacting with your "peers" on sites like this and others...the more information you have the better...

and i generally think it is better to crawl, walk, and then run...by which i mean two things, first put your fantasies in the back of your mind for awhile...most likely they will not be realized immediately and you will have to built a foundation and slowly work your way up in experience and knowledge to really "run"...that also means you have to do your research with an open mind prepared for learning, which means you can't let your ideas, fantasies, concepts, etc, etc become the end all be all in the education process, be open to ideas and information OUTSIDE of what has already popped into your head...

quote:

ORIGINAL: your2bmine
Got a set of ankle and wrist bracelets, blindfold and now what's next other than a partner. What mixtures of pain and pleasure work best?

unfortunately, toys do not a "master"(or dom or top) make, some bottoms/subs/slaves LOVE blindfolds and restraints, for others these are a hard limit that will not be crossed...so, finding the partner is probably your next best practical step(other than continuing the never ending research process), of course there are online personals, local area organizations, local area munches and events, and even national events where you can meet like minded people to start to explore some more...

but, once again i recommend you leave your personal ideas and fantasies at the door and concentrate on the theory and the concepts rather than the specifics you have most likely already built up in your head...

find some like minded people, talk to them, get to know them, THEN you can get to know what they like, what toys and props might be preferred and most of all "What mixtures of pleasure and pain work best" as this as subjective as each individual person...one may like thuddy sensations, another may like stinging, another may like rope, another may prefer chains, it is all highly subjective and for better or worse(i would say better) there is no paint-by-the-numbers or A-B-C way to go about determining these things...

but, as far as general theory on pleasure and pain i would suggest go slow, lots of teasing and sensuality building up to more aggressive sensations, and then back down and around again... think of it like an piece of classical music or movie you want highs and lows, louds and quiets, a roller coaster type effect...

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RE: help learning to be a master - 9/10/2008 2:45:04 PM

MrRodgers

Posts: 10540
Joined: 7/30/2005
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You can follow all of the advice above and learn but submission in a woman is inspired and being a master means having/owning a slave. A 'master' with no slave is not a master at all.

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RE: Help learning to be a Master - 9/10/2008 3:33:23 PM

SlaveOwnerDave

Posts: 113
Joined: 8/22/2007
From: Petaluma, CA
Status: offline

Greetings your2bemine,

quote:

ORIGINAL: your2bmine
Well, Have been seeking ways to be a good Master. Have been having fantasies about it, so time to learn. How does one start?
Got a set of ankle and wrist bracelets, a blindfold, and now what's next other than a partner? Lots! What mixtures of pain and pleasure work best? [Depends on Your bottom. And, on You.]
Appreciate the help.

If your interest is Topping, then try:
"The New Topping Book", by Easton and Hardy;
"The New Bottoming Book", by Easton and Hardy;
"S/M 101", by Jay Wiseman;;

If your interest is Mastery, then I suggest "Master/slave Relations", by Robert Rubel, PhD.

I was going to say, "Attend local classes.", but I doubt there are any in Montana. Instead, attend a Butchmann's weekend. Also, join the Yahoo! group BornSlaves. These each will provide different information. There is also the Journeymen's Academy in Utah, which has been highly recommended to Me.

If your interest is Mastery, rather than Topping, you may e-mail Me. Message Me for My e-mail address.

Read through the old threads here. Join www.RLslavery.com Also, bondage.com has fora, though I do not know what is in them.

Wishing You success,
Master David Goodmen

_____________________________

Intelligence, Logic, and Reason are useful--but only when used!

http://www.experienceproject.com/about/masterdavidgoodmen
http://Master-Dave.LiveJournal.com/
[link]http://people.tribe.net/MasterDave[/

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RE: Help learning to be a Master - 9/10/2008 3:55:17 PM

AnnaOfAramis

Posts: 523
Joined: 7/30/2008
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Greetings,

This girl's master, MasterAramis helps mentor and train novice dominants interested in D/s or M/s. But as most have already said, it isn't about the activities, that is only a small part of it. It is about good leadership, mastering yourself, responsibility, trustworthiness and all that good stuff.

anna

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RE: help learning to be a master - 9/10/2008 8:42:59 PM

goodpet

Posts: 458
Joined: 6/8/2005
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Being a master is like the title implies.. having a level of knowledge and expertise in a given area.

a master carpenter or a master electrician does not get that title by buying a tool belt or tool box and declaring himself one.. it is earned by hard work, education, practice, training, and time.

find a mentor, go to classes at events (yes you might have to travel). read books on M/s. Forget about the toy bag for awhile.. learn about the lifestyle.

Go to the Butchmann Academy, or attend the Master's Training at Taino's Academy ( http://masterslavetraining.org/home.htm ) this spring. (it's too late for a the fall session i think.

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RE: help learning to be a master - 9/10/2008 9:31:42 PM

your2bmine

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Joined: 9/1/2008
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Wow thanks for the help all, will go to the books. Time will tell guess.
Not sure what I want I think. But going to find out.
Again Thanks for the good advice. Will do the book thing and search for the path.
I was thinking it to be easy, but no it is not.?
Again thanks for the help. Those that had some to give.
T.L.C.

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RE: help learning to be a master - 9/11/2008 10:07:47 AM

skeletoncrew

Posts: 17
Joined: 7/5/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: your2bmine

Wow thanks for the help all, will go to the books. Time will tell guess.

time always does...

quote:

ORIGINAL: your2bmine

Not sure what I want I think. But going to find out.

an open mind is very important to the objective study of any topic, so it sounds like you are on the right track...

quote:

ORIGINAL: your2bmine

I was thinking it to be easy, but no it is not.?

relationships and dealing with others is rarely easy in my experience(sometimes it is easier than others to be sure)...and it is probably "easier" to be a Top or a Dom, but being a Master at anything is ALOT of work...it isn't just a play title(though i guess it can be, but don't be expected to be taken very seriously by "true" Masters if you use it that way), it is a VERY serious thing...

you are welcome and good luck with your journey of discovery!!!

< Message edited by skeletoncrew -- 9/11/2008 10:08:42 AM >

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RE: help learning to be a master - 9/11/2008 11:20:42 AM

Dnomyar

Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
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For $19.95 I can make you a Master in 30 days. The deluxe course is $350.00. That gets you a Master of the Universe certificate. This is a limited time offer I have to move around a lot so hurry.

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RE: help learning to be a master - 9/11/2008 2:12:16 PM

Worldly1

Posts: 37
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MrRodgers

You can follow all of the advice above and learn but submission in a woman is inspired and being a master means having/owning a slave. A 'master' with no slave is not a master at all.

I keep hearing this and could not disagree more.

Try going into Leather space and telling a 'Master' that because he has no slave at the moment, he is no longer a Master. You'll be surprised at how quickly you get an attitude adjustment.

No one has the right to define another person's identity in this lifestyle.

You might benefit from reading a book, available from Amazon.com, called 'Slavecraft', written by 'a grateful slave', with Guy Baldwin, an icon in the international world of bdsm.

(in reply to MrRodgers)

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