Why you need to pay a pro-domme (Full Version)

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MsIncontrol -> Why you need to pay a pro-domme (9/13/2008 7:13:20 AM)

My lovely new lover and I, also a lifestyle FemmeDomme, were chatting online today as we do most days lately and were discussing my upcoming plans for formulating a new kinky class.  I'm particularly interested in the fine lines of demarcation between lifestyle and Pro Dommes, where those lines intersect and how, when and if they coalesce.  As a prelude to this post, let me say that I adore ProDommes, do not find them "in competition" with lifestyle Dommes, and have a couple current or former ones as close friends.  Professional Dominas provide a much-needed and valuable service to kinky men and I don't seek to discredit them in any way.  However, there are radical differences in why woman dominate for money and why lifestyle Dommes do not, so seeking out one type when you really should be fishing for another is a huge and unfortunately all-too common mistake for submissive men.  If you're a submissive male and reading this, it IS advice.  Additional note: this is a TOTALLY non-politically correct post.  You have been warned.

YOU MAY WANT TO SEE A PRO DOMME IF...

1. You are married and your wife "just doesn't understand you" but wouldn't mind if you let a stranger whip you and fuck you up the ass.
2. You travel a lot for business and will only be in my town overnight this week, but oh so want to "serve" a beautiful woman.
3. You are a one-trick pony and need someone to indulge your desire to be a toilet, a slutty whore dressed in panties, or want to try that strap-on...but just once.
4. You are a high-powered executive, politician or other self-imposed important figure and need 100% discretion, 100% of the time.  You really aren't submissive; you just want to experience what it's like to give up control.
5. You are a leather/latex/PVC fetishist and want to see the BEST wardrobes on the most conventionally attractive women.  Most lifestyle Dommes aren't going to be able to afford to indulge your every fashionista whim.
6. You are not interested in or won't make time for a full-time Dominant female partner.  Or, you are not interested in getting married/re-married to a Dominant woman.
7. You have committment issues and don't want to work on them but still want to be able to "submit" as you see fit and when your schedule allows.
8. You are a kinky bisexual man partnered to another man and want to be able to indulge in your attraction to women on an occasional basis.
9. You are kinky, independently wealthy, and like getting what you want, when you want it, regardless of cost.
10. You have a controlling nature and want to run the scene from the bottom, having your fantasy fulfilled to the tiniest detail. 


I know it sounds bitchy, and I guess it is.  But sheesh, when will they GET it???

Written in conjunction with:  KinkyArtemis



Lynnxz -> RE: Why you need to pay a pro-domme (9/13/2008 7:17:47 AM)


Hehehe-  ^_^

*Waits patiently for the "OMG WHORES" posts*



HandSolo -> RE: Why you need to pay a pro-domme (9/13/2008 7:20:21 AM)

11. You want to find somebody to play with, and you don't feel like searching for three or ten years. ;)



MsIncontrol -> RE: Why you need to pay a pro-domme (9/13/2008 7:21:38 AM)

Oh..they pay for it one way or the other.  Sure, I do not charge per session....my hubbie got on his knees at my feet and offered me a beautiful diamond ring...when he begged to be mine for life.   I'm thinking that he could have gotten quite a number of (hundreds) $200 sessions for the price of that ring...he he he he.



MsIncontrol -> RE: Why you need to pay a pro-domme (9/13/2008 7:23:03 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: HandSolo

11. You want to find somebody to play with, and you don't feel like searching for three or ten years. ;)


Absolutely!  That is great.  Also add, if you live in BFE and don't want to re-locate to a city where there are a number of choices.



Tantriqu -> RE: Why you need to pay a pro-domme (9/13/2008 7:27:28 AM)

#11:  you don't relate well to real-time humans, and only venture out of your apartment to pay to have your Xena, Angelina and anime porn fantasies fulfilled



LadyHibiscus -> RE: Why you need to pay a pro-domme (9/13/2008 7:29:23 AM)

THANK YOU, this is great!



chiaThePet -> RE: Why you need to pay a pro-domme (9/13/2008 7:35:36 AM)

 
OMG S'MORES!

chia* (the pet)



Lynnxz -> RE: Why you need to pay a pro-domme (9/13/2008 7:36:55 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: chiaThePet


OMG S'MORES!

chia* (the pet)


[:'(]



faerytattoodgirl -> RE: Why you need to pay a pro-domme (9/13/2008 8:23:48 AM)

#11 if you look like and are just as hairy as one of them geico cavemen.



MsIncontrol -> RE: Why you need to pay a pro-domme (9/13/2008 8:33:35 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: faerytattoodgirl

#11 if you look like and are just as hairy as one of them geico cavemen.


I think you can save some money and just go to a salon for some waxing.  I know every wax technician I've ever had has been a complete sadist!  Save money and get your back waxed at the same time!!



faerytattoodgirl -> RE: Why you need to pay a pro-domme (9/13/2008 8:59:42 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsIncontrol

quote:

ORIGINAL: faerytattoodgirl

#11 if you look like and are just as hairy as one of them geico cavemen.


I think you can save some money and just go to a salon for some waxing.  I know every wax technician I've ever had has been a complete sadist!  Save money and get your back waxed at the same time!!


okay..but i meant for a dif reason since chances are this caveman is single...and desperate.  LOL



Wheldrake -> RE: Why you need to pay a pro-domme (9/13/2008 10:39:53 AM)

I suppose the short version is that you should go to a pro domme if you want to experience submission on your own terms - and a lifestyle domme if you're ready to experience submission on someone else's.



zakkan -> RE: Why you need to pay a pro-domme (9/13/2008 10:49:39 AM)

#12. You are trying to get some new ideas for your lifestyle dom.[8|]

#13. You have some ideas, but you want someone to try it out on you first before you suggest it to your lifestyle dom, in case you find out you don't like it but she does.[:o]

#14. You don't know what you want, and you are trying to get some ideas.[:-]

[sm=line.gif]



tasha_tart -> RE: Why you need to pay a pro-domme (9/13/2008 10:51:57 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Tantriqu

#11:  you don't relate well to real-time humans, and only venture out of your apartment to pay to have your Xena, Angelina and anime porn fantasies fulfilled


Damn...who told?

[:D]

Tasha



OneMoreWaste -> RE: Why you need to pay a pro-domme (9/13/2008 11:07:29 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsIncontrol
6. You are not interested in or won't make time for a full-time Dominant female partner.  Or, you are not interested in getting married/re-married to a Dominant woman.


I don't think it's entirely correct to assume that there are NO Dominant Women out there who are looking for play-only partners or Friends-With-Beatings [:-]



Coupleofwhats -> RE: Why you need to pay a pro-domme (9/13/2008 11:22:55 AM)

Great post!

(Although, I do want to point out that some Pro Dommes are also Lifestyle.)

Here are some more reasons to see a Pro:
- You're older but only want to play with very young and attractive women.

- You enjoy play that is higher in risk and you want someone with a lot of experience.

- You prefer scenes with elaborate outfits/playspaces and a plethora of implements.



Alixandria -> RE: Why you need to pay a pro-domme (9/13/2008 11:22:55 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: OneMoreWaste

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsIncontrol
6. You are not interested in or won't make time for a full-time Dominant female partner.  Or, you are not interested in getting married/re-married to a Dominant woman.


I don't think it's entirely correct to assume that there are NO Dominant Women out there who are looking for play-only partners or Friends-With-Beatings [:-]


Of course, you're right.  I would have been one of them had I not gotten disgusted with the search and given up.  Having a narrow range of kinks hurts your chances from the top side as well as the bottom.  However, the bulk of women who are actually *looking* through a site like this one can get their occasional play itch scratched through the regular community things they do.  Once they make it here, they are looking for something that isn't easily found through their casual contacts in the scene.

In my case, I was approached by lots of bottoms (and considered approaching some more who I talked with regularly), but it was made clear by these bottoms that they wanted a fully formed scene with all of the proper accouterments, the fully developed skillset and (preferably) me dressed in the latest kink gear.  They did not want some rank beginner experimenting on the way to getting good ("I can't stand it when I can escape from the bondage").  That is, unless I would consent to play "tease and denial" games which I absolutely refused to do.

So yes, if a fellow simply has the need to get their play needs satisfied on a schedule, they have a better chance if paying for it.  If I had been more affluent, I would have considered paying for it.

Alix




Misstoyou -> RE: Why you need to pay a pro-domme (9/13/2008 11:33:40 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MsIncontrol


YOU MAY WANT TO SEE A PRO DOMME IF...



6. You are not interested in or won't make time for a full-time Dominant female partner.  Or, you are not interested in getting married/re-married to a Dominant woman.

[/link]


Using myself as an example, not all un-attached lifestyle Dommes are looking for a full-time life-time committment. I don't disagree with the rest of the list, but please, please, please don't send all the part-time submissives to the pros! lol



Lynnxz -> RE: Why you need to pay a pro-domme (9/13/2008 11:38:40 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Coupleofwhats

Great post!

(Although, I do want to point out that some Pro Dommes are also Lifestyle.)

Here are some more reasons to see a Pro:
- You're older but only want to play with very young and attractive women.



Hahahaha... yes!



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