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RE: Do you like it when your sub cries? - 1/10/2009 5:16:09 AM

T1981

Posts: 557
Joined: 12/6/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Bratzilla

I love to cry during sex, it's not just cathartic, it's something that truly puts me in that sub frame of mind. I think it's hot and deliciously pervy to be with somebody who gets a little turned on by my tears. It's a matter of breaking me down to the most primal and visceral level, I think. It also reinforces the person's power over not just my body, but my mind and my emotions.

quote:

ORIGINAL: BrokenPsyche

I cry at the drop of a hat, for just about any and all reasons. For me it is a form of release basically any way you look at it. And as for the question...does my Dom like it?

HELL YES!!!!

Same here - I'm an exceedingly sensitive person, it doesn't take much in the vanilla world to make me cry - out of sadness, out of joy, out of longing, out of pain. Disney movies, songs while I'm driving, news stories - hell, I have even been known to cry at a few commericals. There are weeks when, for whatever reason, I cry almost every day. I actually find that if I don't shed a few tears at least once in a while, I get emotionally "stuck" and often need to watch a sad movie to move through it.

It's a form of release for me - and when coupled with sex, and specifically dominance and submission - it's often the only way I can process and release the phsyical and emotional/mental sensations that I am feeling. Often it's from the duality of what's going on - pleasure/pain, fear/excitement, anger/happiness - I'm just wired that way, and crying is often the only thing that lets it all go for me.

My husband was not so turned on by it the first time, he was mostly concerned that he had done something wrong. But as we go along, he is finding that he takes pride in my tears during a scene, and that, yes, it does turn him on.

It's bueatiful for me, to be able to share that with him. It really does break down walls for us on a very primitive level, and it allows him to see, to really see, the depth of what he is doing and how much he can control me, and we both enjoy that.

< Message edited by T1981 -- 1/10/2009 5:21:37 AM >

_____________________________

"Nothing is pointless, every single thing you do resonates." -Pintsize

(in reply to BrokenPsyche)

RE: Do you like it when your sub cries? - 1/10/2009 12:35:30 PM

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Joined: 1/12/2006
From: This month? Maryland
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quote:

ORIGINAL: hejira92

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cuffkinks

It depends on why she's crying.
If it's an emotional reaction to something in life that is genuinely troubling her, then no. I don't want to see My little girl in tears.
I will hold her and let her cry, dry her tears, talk to her and comfort her until she's finished.
If it's a release during a punishment for something she did that was wrong, I'll continue with the punishment firmly and comfort her as much as is needed when I'm done. My little girl rarely needs punishment, which suits Me fine. She's a good girl and that's the way I want her. But when it does happen I hold firm to the punishment I've decided to give out. Then once it's over the issue is forgotten, never to be mentioned again. It's now time to comfort her, console her and commend her for taking her punishment. (I will always end a punishment session on a positive.)
On the other hand...
If it's during a "play" session and she starts crying, (Provided it's not a genuine distress trigger I might have hit on) it only fuels the sadistic fire in Me to go further. When she cries during play, I want her to cry a thousand tears as I fuck her savagely. It is so hot to watch her go from a crying, sobbing mess to the lust-driven slut she is. To see her body betray her and watch her go from tears to arousal...Awesome!

So...That's My .

Sir,

My gut reaction to your post: "You are so f*cking hot!"

Hell...that was my gut reaction and I don't even know you two. Rock on ;)

_____________________________

“These S&M people ... they are bossy! There’s also a creepy connection between leather sex, ‘Star Trek’ and the Renaissance Faire.”

- Comedian Margaret Cho

(in reply to hejira92)

RE: Do you like it when your sub cries? - 1/10/2009 12:44:20 PM

Posts: 961
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From: This month? Maryland
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

quote:

ORIGINAL: IR

I do not like it when sub tries to use tears to get her way. In other words to start crying before punishment starts.
IR

To me, that's a red flag. It says that you don't believe people can be in emotional pain, only physical.

I agree with you here. If someone begins to cry before anything "painful" has even occurred, you might want to pause and talk to them about what's going on in their head. If this is a pattern, perhaps you need to change something about what you're doing or how you're reacting and not assume it's being used as manipulation.

quote:

Plus I have a real problem with men who assume the only reason women cry is to be manipulative. We're women, at the wrong time of the month we can burst into tears at a commercial of someone taking their favorite detergent away. Deal with it.

LOL! So true. I'm a pretty tough cookie most of the time but every so often (you know when) I'll get all teary eyed from a sentimental song on the radio or a tv show with baby animals. It's sooo not funny!

_____________________________

“These S&M people ... they are bossy! There’s also a creepy connection between leather sex, ‘Star Trek’ and the Renaissance Faire.”

- Comedian Margaret Cho

(in reply to DesFIP)

RE: Do you like it when your sub cries? - 1/10/2009 3:11:44 PM

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Joined: 1/8/2009
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Not at all.

(in reply to DominaSmartass)

RE: Do you like it when your sub cries? - 1/10/2009 3:22:50 PM

Posts: 573
Joined: 1/2/2008
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There is two kinds of crying ...

1) crying when I administer pain.
2) crying when there is definitely something wrong.

Life is not simple. I respond to my slaves feelings accordingly. If they are legitimately in pain; plain and simple they need support.

MstrPBK
St. Paul, MN

(in reply to Godsofold)

RE: Do you like it when your sub cries? - 1/13/2009 9:08:11 PM

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Joined: 11/7/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

quote:

ORIGINAL: IR

I do not like it when sub tries to use tears to get her way. In other words to start crying before punishment starts.
IR

To me, that's a red flag. It says that you don't believe people can be in emotional pain, only physical.

Plus I have a real problem with men who assume the only reason women cry is to be manipulative. We're women, at the wrong time of the month we can burst into tears at a commercial of someone taking their favorite detergent away. Deal with it.

If I'm overly exhausted and running on little sleep for days I will cry at the drop of a hat.

(in reply to DesFIP)

RE: Do you like it when your sub cries? - 1/14/2009 7:49:38 AM

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Joined: 1/3/2009
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*smiles*... cublet suspects her Master's answer may have been pretty identical to this... *giggles* she will ask Him and see what He says...

cublet(MS)

doh! silly girl! my post was in reply to Cufflinks answer! sorry- new to this!
c(MS)

< Message edited by cubletMS -- 1/14/2009 7:51:42 AM >

(in reply to VampiresLair)

RE: Do you like it when your sub cries? - 1/14/2009 4:41:16 PM

Posts: 12580
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From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
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I like it when they cry...
Have you ever seen a slave love her Master so deeply that she crys from the emotional release after a good beating? Have you ever seen a slave feel so passionate that she crosses the pleasure/pain threshold and cums so intensely that it makes her weep? Have you ever seen trust so deep and complete that tears flow when she follows Master faithfully and overcomes her fears?

I thrive on the connection, the bonds between a Master and slave and between a sadist and masochist. I love seeing the look on my slave's face when I see that I control her and what she is feeling. I like to cross Masterism with sadism while I explore emotional fears, expand physical limits, break mental boundaries and fulfill forbidden desires. I passionately mix love, torture, sex, fear, pleasure, pain, anguish, lust, trust and I test faith. I want to see tears of joy, tears of pain, tears of love, tears of pleasure and tears from fear... I like it when they cry.

_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to xxxKellyxxx)

RE: Do you like it when your sub cries? - 1/14/2009 6:53:47 PM

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From: Portland, Oregon
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quote:

ORIGINAL: xxxKellyxxx

...From spanking or any other type of punishment...

I do, but I don't have much experience with this. My partners have not been the type to cry "at the drop of a hat".

I've brought forth tears on several occasions during play, but I've always stopped to figure out what was going on, to check in, make sure everything's alright, etc. And, I think most times it was a good thing that I did.

I've never quite had the practice or experience to comfortably forge ahead when the tears present themselves.

But, if I knew from experience that my partner was really ok with me forging ahead, I'm pretty sure I could enjoy doing so, and enjoy the tears.

(in reply to xxxKellyxxx)

RE: Do you like it when your sub cries? - 1/14/2009 7:33:55 PM

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I have always resisted crying and have found it very difficult to cry with Sir. In the beginning instead of tears, I would break out laughing-not a good thing. After talking to me about it and realizing that at 19 I conditioned myself to not cry, he had to work with me to give myself permission to cry. Even with that though, Sir seems pretty neurtral with me crying. It is though encouraged over laughing, which i finally have stopped.

(in reply to Jeptha)

RE: Do you like it when your sub cries? - 1/14/2009 8:13:31 PM

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I find tears to be exceptionally sexy....

I find a girl crying to manipulate enough to turn me off regardless of whats going on...

I lost a friend once because I saw a girl in a hospital walk out of a patients room and start crying... I bit my lip and got a boner... she said I was a f---ing sicko...

(in reply to oceanwynds)

RE: Do you like it when your sub cries? - 1/14/2009 8:45:39 PM

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No, I don't like it, the exception being tears of joy or ectasy.

Of course she might cry because I don't like her to cry.

< Message edited by Petruchio -- 1/14/2009 8:47:58 PM >

(in reply to xxxKellyxxx)

RE: Do you like it when your sub cries? - 1/15/2009 2:44:26 AM

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Joined: 6/29/2008
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There are good tears and bad tears and it depends on which kind. Good tears ar not just tears of joy or ecstasy. There are also cathartic tears, when her emotional pain is squeezed from her body drop by drop. I help her to shed these tears by bringing her body to a place where she can feel 'safe' doing so. Usually that involves inflicting pain on her. Yes, I love those tears and I find them very hot and when I see them I feel a sense of satisfaction as well as lust.

Bad tears are the ones I am not illiciting (or at least not on purpose). No I do not like them.

_____________________________

Use your head can't you use your head? You're on Earth! There's no cure for that! - Samuel Beckett (Endgame)

(in reply to Petruchio)

RE: Do you like it when your sub cries? - 1/15/2009 5:16:09 AM

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If i started crying during a scene, my Master would stop and wonder what was wrong. He would have to push me past my ability to take pain for that to happen. Only once has it happened, the first time He used the Violet Wand on me. The feeling was too intense and new, and i broke down. He stopped immediately and held me.

i'm not saying that i am such a masochist that pain can't move me to tears, it is that i usually process that by screaming, yelping or otherwise making noise, not by crying. Crying is my release for emotional pain not physical. It is also a stress reaction when i am extremely angry or frustrated.

We did discuss once a scene that would continue until i did cry, for cathartic release, but the dam broke on that issue on its own and the scene was not needed.

_____________________________

And thus i conclude with a wish you go well,
Sweet be your dreams, may your happiness swell,
I'll leave you here, for my journey begins
i've gone to be with Him again...

(in reply to Maxwell67)

RE: Do you like it when your sub cries? - 1/16/2009 12:18:38 PM

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Joined: 12/6/2008
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No, I do not "like" it. However, there are times when it is necessary to cut deeply so that a lesson is never forgotten. However, its also imperative that a sub understand that she has to learn the lesson for her own good. If its not for her growth, then there should not be a cause for tears. *Should be noted that I don't count pain play - as I don't do it.

(in reply to VampiresLair)

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