Subs Who Meet Too Quickly...

Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (Full Version)

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MasterSteve57 -> Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (10/6/2008 7:53:39 PM)
When I chatted via phone with a new sub acquintance, I asked if she would like to meet for dinner some evening, she paused and seemed to balk. When I switched my approach and invited her to meet for a scene at a local hotel she jumped at the chance. When we entered the hotel room I said "Here you are in a hotel room with a complete stranger. You're very lucky I'm a nice guy!" It never ceases to amaze me how careless some subs can be and that goes double in a bdsm world that involves bondage. Fifteen minutes after arriving I had her handcuffed (with police issue cuffs), gagged and completely at my mercy. She hadn't arranged a safe call and when I instructed her to use a safe word should she become uncomfortable with anything I do - she shrugged her shoulders as if she couldn't care less. Even as a DOM I sometimes feel uncomfortable traveling to meet sub women. But subs should be even more careful given the nature of the game...

KatyLied -> RE: Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (10/6/2008 7:58:43 PM)
Some people are attracted to danger, perhaps she is one of them.

sub4hire -> RE: Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (10/6/2008 8:16:28 PM)
Some people don't value themselves either. No self worth=no self esteem. Do with me as you'd like types.

Quivver -> RE: Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (10/6/2008 9:05:46 PM)
take it for what it's worth, but you accepted the behavior.

winoverme -> RE: Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (10/6/2008 9:30:55 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sub4hire Some people don't value themselves either. No self worth=no self esteem. Do with me as you'd like types. quote: Some people don't value themselves either. No self worth=no self esteem. Do with me as you'd like types. Perhaps that girl needed to feel she was REALLY getting into slight trouble? The fact that she jumped at the occasion to meet at the hotel proves to me that she was expecting chills and thrills...Perhaps this remark about a safe word just destroyed the magic for her...You always prefer to think that the situation you're in is real, not fake...At least, its fun to be able to keep that illusion..If i had been a dominant, i would have done lightly with her at first...Then i would have increased the pain or difficulty by degree, waiting for a sign from her..By going lightly, you are not too fast and if she can get more, she will tell you probably...In my opinion, she expected to be dominated...She didn't think of it as a game...

CalifChick -> RE: Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (10/6/2008 9:38:40 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MasterSteve57 When we entered the hotel room I said "Here you are in a hotel room with a complete stranger. You're very lucky I'm a nice guy!" And you were very lucky that she was a "nice girl" and didn't have two big burly guys waiting to jump you. Cali

girlygurl -> RE: Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (10/6/2008 9:46:51 PM)
MS, You should consider yourself fortunate as well. Although you were eventually in control, you weren't when she first arrived (I assume).... thus she could have pulled some looney tune act and then where would you be. I agree with you in that she was foolish to meet a stranger in a motel room... however, You were just as foolish. It doesn't matter if one is a D-type or S-type, taking the proper precautions for a first time meet is essential. Be well and be safe out there. girly

wandersalone -> RE: Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (10/7/2008 4:24:57 AM)
I am pretty sure there will be many dominants who think you are one lucky person for having had this opportunity...I can't recall you saying no to her and leaving if you thought she was so careless so what does it say about you that you stayed and then posted this thread?

persephonee -> RE: Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (10/7/2008 4:35:43 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MasterSteve57 When I chatted via phone with a new sub acquintance, I asked if she would like to meet for dinner some evening, she paused and seemed to balk. When I switched my approach and invited her to meet for a scene at a local hotel she jumped at the chance. When we entered the hotel room I said "Here you are in a hotel room with a complete stranger. You're very lucky I'm a nice guy!" It never ceases to amaze me how careless some subs can be and that goes double in a bdsm world that involves bondage. Fifteen minutes after arriving I had her handcuffed (with police issue cuffs), gagged and completely at my mercy. She hadn't arranged a safe call and when I instructed her to use a safe word should she become uncomfortable with anything I do - she shrugged her shoulders as if she couldn't care less. Even as a DOM I sometimes feel uncomfortable traveling to meet sub women. But subs should be even more careful given the nature of the game... ...perse doing her best Dom impersonation......"So I towered over her helpless form as she knelt...handcuffed and gagged...and i lectured her on safety for 15 minutes. I told her that she was to stand up and turn around. I took off the cuffs and gag. As she turned to me, confused, tears welling in her eyes, I told her that we needed to get to know eachother as people before I anally violated her and called her a slut. I waited as she dressed....I, of course, never undressed, as I had quickly decided that this was not the person I wanted to spend the rest of my days with and therefore was not going to use sexually and then abandon, like so much submissive garbage on the side of the road. We left the room unused and went to the restaurant and discussed her future behavior over jalapeno poppers and root beer." ~FIN!~ i dont mean to interrupt and insert my version of how this went, but if youre going to post about some people and their choices in life....try to live yours as an example. peace and perspective, perse

ThundersCry -> RE: Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (10/7/2008 4:38:29 AM)
What makes you think you were not the one being....careless? Wiat till you meet a psyco bitch... alone in a hotel room without a safe eee pooo calll =L=

PeonForHer -> RE: Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (10/7/2008 5:09:59 AM)
Well, I for one can't see how you acted badly and I especially don't see why it was somehow wrong of you to write this post. I had a message from a twenty-year-old Domme on Friday who said she was in the area and wanted to meet that night. It was midnight when she sent the message. I was astonished. We never met - she didn't respond to a message I sent in reply containing my mobile number. As it turned out, she was probably a fake and a scam artist. But, at the time, my overriding thought was "What the hell is the matter with you? I could be any kind of a psycho!" I have a sister that age and I often worry about her in the same way. I think the warning you posted here can't be repeated often enough, Steve.

persephonee -> RE: Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (10/7/2008 5:57:17 AM)
No, the warning is a good one....peon. That isnt my issue. my issue with the post is that, as the dominant in that situation, as the person in control of that scene, he had the power to stop her behavior, affect a positive change in this strangers life...and instead he chose to come. Well, welcome to the jungle. Dont judge the girl and not the guy. As guilty as she was for not taking measures (and we dont know that she didnt)...he was just as guilty for seeing a vulnerability and taking advantage of it...which i suppose happens every day, im not blind to the way of the world. But he posted it as if he had done the right thing, the chivalrous thing, in response. He most decidedly did not.

KatyLied -> RE: Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (10/7/2008 5:57:56 AM)
quote: take it for what it's worth, but you accepted the behavior. This struck me as well. He's complaining that although he set up the meeting, he felt it was inappropriate of her to participate.

PeonForHer -> RE: Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (10/7/2008 6:18:11 AM)
On a lighter note - imagine my confusion of feelings at this (as I then thought) twenty-year-old Domme contacting me for an instant meet. There I was, wanting to be respectful on the one hand, but on the other, wanting to tell her off like she was my "little sister". I actually ended up feeling glad that "she" (assuming it was a she) was a fake. A headache. I don't expect it'll be the last time it happens, either.

persephonee -> RE: Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (10/7/2008 6:27:35 AM)
yeah...ya gotta watch out for yourself. Rule of thumb...strange propositions at midnight and unsolicited...equals scam.

Aileen1968 -> RE: Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (10/7/2008 6:40:22 AM)
Maybe she was really hoping you'd bring your teddy bear. On a serious note...why were you the one to ask to meet in a hotel room and play if you thought that was reckless? I've met, been bound and gagged and had all kinds of other stuff done to me on first meets. I was not reckless. I did not agree to do that with anyone who asked...only with those I had an attraction to and had gut instincts about . It was not a self esteem issue for me. It was purely a thrill issue. I loved that intense feeling that it could be dangerous. I had a line that I didn't cross. If I had any flags as to my ultimate safety then I passed on a meeting. I only took that fantasy thrill so far. You are the pot calling the kettle black.

NuevaVida -> RE: Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (10/7/2008 7:37:49 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: CalifChick quote: ORIGINAL: MasterSteve57 When we entered the hotel room I said "Here you are in a hotel room with a complete stranger. You're very lucky I'm a nice guy!" And you were very lucky that she was a "nice girl" and didn't have two big burly guys waiting to jump you. Cali I thought of this, too. When I first met the man I'm currently seeing, he said, "Hmm, how do I know you're not packing?" (he knows I have a hand gun). I grinned and said, "You don't." Trust and psychosis work in both directions. Having said that, I relate to what Aileen said, too. With a good gut instinct, there is something to be said for seizing life by the horns and enjoying the thrill. I would not do that with anyone, but certainly would with someone I had a good feeling about.

JumpingJax -> RE: Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (10/7/2008 8:01:57 AM)
Why would anyone want to sleep someone who's instinct is to skip dinner and go right to the hotel for a first time meeting. Protection or no protection - why go near that thing. I know I know - don't judge.... Your disease is your disease and that's Ok and all.....

marieToo -> RE: Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (10/7/2008 8:07:38 AM)
So, you participated in exactly what you rail against. If this is how you really feel, perhaps you should live it.

bipolarber -> RE: Subs Who Meet Too Quickly... (10/7/2008 12:14:38 PM)
Maybe she didn't want to be seen in public...it might get back to her husband or bf.... But a meeting with you in a private space would have been okay... low risk to her reputation.

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