RE: What is this Doms deal?

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RE: What is this Doms deal? - 12/16/2005 4:51:22 PM

candystripper

Posts: 3486
Joined: 11/1/2005
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quote:

BUT, and this is important, the guy should be straight up and honest with you about what's going on so that you can decide for yourself whether or not you want to do this.

OscarHargeaves

No one with any sense would flame Oscar; a kind and insightful Man. i agree, if the Man is honest about what He seeks and that He will never leave His wife, and the two wish to pursue a D/s relationship, it's no one's business but theirs. However, Oscar, for every Man who is honest about being married, it seems there are 25 who lie *sigh*.

candystripper

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RE: What is this Doms deal? - 12/16/2005 4:54:58 PM

candystripper

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Joined: 11/1/2005
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Naw; if he were on parole he'd be chasing me, LMAO.

Quote from Man who bought me a drink: "Say, how long do those federal warrants last, anyway?" ROFL.

candystripper

(in reply to FTopinMichigan)

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RE: What is this Doms deal? - 12/18/2005 10:26:13 PM

Sensualips

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Joined: 10/8/2005
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quote:

I'm not much into "casual," or "just play" encounters. Club play is one thing, and is quite fun ,

I don't differentiate between these. For me, club play is one form of casual play -- and the primary form I engage in. Of course even "club play" can be broken down further.

quote:

I've actually had men invite themselves to my home, several minutes after meeting me,

We certainly agree there - that seems to be a situation neither of us feels comfortable with.

(in reply to FTopinMichigan)

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RE: What is this Doms deal? - 12/19/2005 5:38:36 AM

FTopinMichigan

Posts: 571
Joined: 7/5/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Sensualips

quote:

I'm not much into "casual," or "just play" encounters. Club play is one thing, and is quite fun ,

I don't differentiate between these. For me, club play is one form of casual play -- and the primary form I engage in. Of course even "club play" can be broken down further.

For me, the difference is that the "Club play" is in front of others...usually MANY others.

There's sometimes safety in numbers and with others around, there are watchful eyes, to enjoy the scene itself, as well as offer some level of safety. Most clubs incorporate the use of skilled DMs to keep things in line with the rules, and you're never "alone." The casual, just play encounters are usually one-on-one and not my preference with unknowns. There's no one protecting your back, when you're alone.

K

< Message edited by FTopinMichigan -- 12/19/2005 5:39:33 AM >

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RE: What is this Doms deal? - 12/20/2005 6:16:15 AM

LadyKim

Posts: 191
Joined: 11/11/2004
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windy,

It seriously sounds like he has at least a significant other at home. You should communicate to him your concerns. Let him know that you are not seeking a serious relationship; however, you do not wish to be the dirty little secret that can blow up in his face (and yours) later down the road. If he is in a relationship, then see if the other party knows of his preclivities. They may have an arrangement where he is allowed to play so many times a month.

I have a good friend (who is dominant) who has a significant other at home that is not completely aware of his lifestyle desires (though not completely ignornant of them either). He goes out once or twice a month to play. It is part of the understanding in their relationship. She does not begrudge him his play times, but does not wish to have the details flung in her face. He normally tells girls that he is just looking for play. If they ask, he'll let them know a relationship beyond play is not a possibility.

MzKim

(in reply to windy135)

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Post #: 45