More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out

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lovingpet -> More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out (11/10/2008 7:19:40 PM)
Okay, so here it goes. I am fully aware of the diagnostic criteria for such things as depression, anxiety, bipolar, etc etc. I have the background personally and professionally to be able to assess these things. There are many ways for these conditions to manifest and courses they can take. There are as many underlying factors as there are cases it seems sometimes (not really, but still). Now there are some questions that are very specific to the individual when it comes to diagnosis and especially when it comes to deciding to seek treatment. I can observe from the outside all day long and still not know what the person is actually experiencing, even when they try to communicate it. I don't mean this as in I don't listen to what they have to say, but that they are the ones intrinsically experiencing it, not me. Only they know how they are experiencing my set of observations. What makes up a bad emotional experience versus a full on diagnosible problem? What one considers managable may be considered utter misery to another. Is it more in terms of consequences? Action? Perception? Observation clearly isn't the gold standard because I can observe someone and determine a diagnosis, but the person may seem more or less undisturbed by the same set of things that make my decision, while something else entirely may bring them to wanting help dealing with the very thing I diagnose. What are the overall factors that bring you or a loved one to finally seek help? What are the things that make this situation no longer bearable? What things have fed into this (ex.: hormonal shifts, certain illnesses, etc)? This is not necessarily a question that is strictly lifestyle oriented. It is just some obviously random thoughts going through my head. If anyone has been able to follow this and care to share, it would be appreciated and I will clarify if (or more likely when) it is needed. As always, I am looking for kind answers. Thanks in advance! lovingpet

synningsub -> RE: More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out (11/10/2008 7:44:35 PM)
i think i get the gist of what youre saying.. for me, i finally sought help when my mood swings interfered with the rest of my life and the ability to function day-to-day.. this is different for every single person.. theres a chick i work with thats bipolar I and BPD as i am but is having much more severe issues than mine at the moment.. she throws her diagnoses around like an excuse and it pisses me off to no end.. even during the times when ive been hospitalized, ive tried never to lean on that.. i know that no matter what the reason is, its my responsibility to find ways that make me feel better.. whether its going to hospital or taking meds, walking, talking to a buddy, whatever it takes is up to me

MsLadySue -> RE: More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out (11/10/2008 8:31:17 PM)
Work had been hell for almost a year with a male manager who was like a woman with permanent PMS. On top of this he'd nit-pick, had no people skills and (in his own mind) always right. I got home from work and had a panic attack thinking about what was ahead of me when I walked back into the office next morning. For several weeks prior I wasn't sleeping well, perhaps 3-4 hours each night, and before falling asleep my mind was reeling on work issues

lovingpet -> RE: More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out (11/10/2008 8:43:45 PM)
Specifically for you, what were the day to day things that became difficult that were too important or too miserable to let go any further? As specific as you are able to recall them, how did it feel to lose control over these aspects of your daily life? Thanks for responding! I know this post is a mess! LOL lovingpet

lovingpet -> RE: More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out (11/10/2008 8:46:09 PM)
What were the things that told you this was going well beyond just having a lot of bad days or needing to change jobs? What made it just too miserable to keep on the way things were? I think I am seeing some of what you are getting at, but would appreciate further clarification. Thanks! lovingpet

CookieSlave -> RE: More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out (11/10/2008 8:57:52 PM)
If I'm understanding you correctly.... How it manifests itself, how I work through it, what caused it and what other factors might currently exist, and.. more, I guess. It's not a simple question, or a simple answer. But.. I am good at "reading" myself, generally, and I know.. I'm more honest with myself if I need more help with something, if it's beyond just me "getting over it", so to speak. I just have to have my own way of figuring it out, I have a process I need to go through. For instance.. right now I'm going through something that is really beyond just the situation, and I know that, and I'm just keeping a close eye on me, and making sure I process this out the way I need to. I'm aware of the problem and any factors that might get in the way of me getting past it, and I am steeling myself to say "I need help with this". My expectation right now is that I will work it through myself, but I'm sharp enough to be prepared, to look out for myself, just in case I need to go there. So.. short answer is probably, if it's situational it's usually apparent to me, and I can usually work through that. If it's bigger than just the situation and/or there are other factors too closely tied to whatever the problem is, if I have extended trouble functioning, it becomes more touch and go. I've only really "exploded" once, and that was a long time ago, but I'm more aware of.. or in tune with.. me than I was then. I hope that made some sense?? --cs

NuevaVida -> RE: More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out (11/10/2008 9:03:40 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lovingpet What are the overall factors that bring you or a loved one to finally seek help? What are the things that make this situation no longer bearable? What things have fed into this (ex.: hormonal shifts, certain illnesses, etc)? This is not necessarily a question that is strictly lifestyle oriented. It is just some obviously random thoughts going through my head. The list is long, lol. I had a two year period in which I lost 5 family members (including my Dad) and a close friend to cancer, almost lost my nephew to a second suicide attempt, filed for divorce, got a new boss at work, had a cancer scare that resulted in surgery, had my house emptied of everything I owned (by my ex), had my wages garnished for spousal support, began a foreclosure process as a result, was in school and pushed to get straight A's (by my owner at the time), lost all my money (due to divorce) and lost my faith - religiously and in others. I hit a rock bottom, emotionally, after trying to hold it all together. I literally could not stop crying, for several days straight. I could not make it to work before 10:00 and I was worthless while there. I told my boss I couldn't hold on anymore, and was going to the doctor. I sobbed through the doctor appointment, and he put me on medical leave and medication until I could function again. I call it "my meltdown" and family & friends know what I am referring to. I argued with my doctor against the meds, and he explained that sometimes serious stresses can cause depression such that ones physiology can not balance things out on their own (that's my layman's interpretation). The doctor appointment was a year ago. I was on leave until January, and I got off my meds last September. In my time off, I went to therapy, traveled extensively and journalled extensively, and got reacquainted with myself and my life. I'm better on this side of the melt down than I was before all that stuff happened. I've undergone a lot of changes in my thinking, in the way I feel about things, and in my faith. Life is good!

SOsMINE -> RE: More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out (11/10/2008 9:13:30 PM)
Well I am Bi Polar Manic Depressive. Mine was buried deep. I had to take care of so many things that I never had time to take care of me and the why. Finally my last husband was kind and loving (in the beginning) and I finally relaxed enough and it all just came to the surface. When I kept calling into work. Staying in my bed. Ignoring all around. Then the paranoia to where I could not even talk to another human being. For me I waited too late. Finally with prodding and bullying my husband got me to a Dr. After seeing the Dr that day I was immediately put into the pysche ward. That was 7 years ago I regularly go to my Pyschiatrist and take my meds. Now I'm wiser and recognize the signs if I need to see the Dr sooner than every 2 weeks. I still have my moments to where I want to be the worlds best patient and not bother the Dr. S O has since helped me through this and made me see it's best for everyone that I seek help immediately when I see the symptoms coming on. Hope this helped you out.

MissSCD -> RE: More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out (11/10/2008 9:58:46 PM)
*I suffered from depression since I was 9 years old. Life changes effected my decision to seek help.* *First I had a viral infection which caused my hearing loss. I could no longer do the job I had done for 11.5 years.* *I was going through a nasty divorce. There were several other things happening at the time.* *I over exteneded myself to the tune of about $25,000.* *I felt there was no way out. I started thinking about suicide.* *One day, I med my mother's pschye. He is an expert in his field. He is one of the top four in my city.* *I liked the way he talked to my mother, and asked him if I could come to see him. He said yes, and he diagnoised me as bipolar 2. I think I am a 1.* *I can tell I am in a terrible, pissy mood. He is going to need to adjust my meds on the 20th.* *They tell me when I am in an episode of mania, the eyes roll back into my head. I look like the devil. I feel like the devil.* *Bipolar feels like evil. I call it the beast no one can tame.* *If you or your loved one is experiencing radical mood swings and thinking about suicide, then please, get them to the pschye.* *It costs a lot of money; however, he has given me a second chance at life.* *Good luck, and blessings.* *MissSCD*

MsLadySue -> RE: More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out (11/10/2008 10:20:17 PM)
Having nightmares about the office. Hearing the alarm ring in the morning and my stomach turning at the thought of going to work. A feeling of dread the minute I walked into the office building. I began forgetting the simple things in regards to a job I'd been doing for 21 years and feeling totally overwhelmed each time I was asked to do some simple task outside of my regular work. Seeing no end to these feelings of gloom and doom along with feeling completely helpless to make a change or having any confidence in my ability to change things.

DesFIP -> RE: More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out (11/10/2008 10:23:53 PM)
Stress of any kind can trigger a psychiatric episode in someone vulnerable to it. As far as when I walked into the office asking for help, that was when I recognized I was having suicidal ideation. I was still fully functional at that point but knew enough that if my thoughts were spiralling down, my ability to function would soon be following. The psychiatrist believed it was set off by perimenopause. Apparently the reason why suicide rates are highest in teens and middle aged is because those are the two life cycles when hormones change. I suffer from unipolar depression.

came4U -> RE: More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out (11/10/2008 11:57:54 PM)
If someone is lifelong moody/mania and crisis modivated, it is an obvious. How you can not notice it early on, is beyond me. How to handle it? Drop it. I have known some bipolar people in my lifetime, manipulation is their game, a game I don't play, nor is it my role to cure them. If that someone is a person you chose to love (and not a family member) and this mentality is news to you, I would suggest to do the same. It is their choice to get help, not yours to push them to get help unil it debelitates you, give then reasonable time to want to change or leave the situation. If the OP refers to a dominant with these issues, he is no dominant, a man who has no control over his thoughts and actions is no dominant. I wouldn't tolerate someone with mental issues for an instant. Current or closet skeletons, no thanks. If someone is causing you stress, ...uhhg, you worry too much and need to take care of yourself. a family member you take special loving care with, extended and manditory patience.

synningsub -> RE: More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out (11/11/2008 6:03:32 AM)
i have a tendency to wait til i get to the point of no return with my meltdowns.. i try to handle them on my own til its obvious due to daily crying jags, extreme paranoia & irritability, and continuous suicidal thoughts that i cant do it alone anymore.. for me, i cant handle the meds all the time 24/7 as my swings are managable 75% of the time.. when they get to that point its time for a complete overhaul including meds, therapy, and possibly hospitalization..

chamberqueen -> RE: More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out (11/11/2008 6:13:47 AM)
I was first diagnosed with depression when I went to the doctor with medical symptoms. I actually laughed at him and told him that he was wrong, that I could still laugh, could still find humor. He told me to take the medication and see if there was a change after three weeks. If there was not then I would know that the diagnosis was wrong. My body is very sensitive to changes from medication and I started seeing a change within 4 days. I was sure the whole time he was wrong, but after those 4 days I knew he was right. No one around me would have known it was depression. I felt shame for having fallen into a depression until I realized that it was a chemical imbalance - whether the imbalance brought on the mood or the mood brought on the imbalance it had to be dealt with. It can be a very hard thing for a person to accept, so if you are asking on behalf of another you might see it in them but they may not be willing to see it in themselves. There is much less of a stigma about it now than there was 20 some years ago when I was first diagnosed. Often a person will not seek help until they somehow feel debilitated; not able to live their daily life in a "normal" manner. They may slowly accept changes like not being able to get out of bed easily, feeling tired often throughout the day, losing interest in their favorite hobbies or people. When the change is gradual enough it can almost go unnoticed. I currently take no over the counter medication for my depression but use a combination of Omego 3 fish oil tablets and St Johns Wort. If the person takes vitamins or supplements on a regular basis you may be able to suggest that they take these. The imbalance tends to be like a roller coaster - highs and lows but the medication (or supplements) help to smooth out the ride. I have the type of personality where I can take a lot but then one straw seems to break the camel's back. If the person you are concerned about is similar then it may be very hard to see that coming. Often the last straw is something very small and could be of no consequence at all to someone else but somehow hurt them to the heart. I am guessing that you have already suggested medical treatment since you talked about how familiar you are with depression. If this has been refused, and the person seems unwilling to do anything to help themselves, you may want to stage an intervention. Get others together who also care deeply about this person, sit the person down, and each of you voice how you have seen the problem manifesting itself and how much they care about the person and want them to get help. Ultimately the decision is up to the person, no matter how much you care about them. I wish you both the very best as you go through this difficult time.

jenny722 -> RE: More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out (11/11/2008 6:23:09 AM)
For me.. the signal is when I'm unable to do (or care about) my schoolwork. That probably sounds pretty juveniele, but I've been a straight-A student my entire life and I've always had this willpower to prioritize school as the first thing in my life. I'm not talking just high school, this continued and got worse during my undergraduate college years and has even into my graduate studies. The daily mopey, feeling down, lingering depression - I can handle. I'm used to it, and at times I almost feel like its a safety net, because I'm stable in that down feeling. But when I start having moments of intense anger and depression, when I start getting insomnia again, when my stomach ulcers reappear, I start watching myself more carefully - I start trying to talk to the few friends I have who I can talk to about these things, that know my history. And then the breaking point, where I know I need to seek professional help of some sort, is when I can't concentrate. I'm a definite type A personality, and when I stop caring about my schoolwork and/or about my job, when I start feeling inadequate in the things that I always excel in, I have to do something. My age tends to make therapists and doctors believe that I'm over-reacting, that this isn't as bad as it is. Then when I explain all of my medical history (diagnosed depression at 17, stomach ulcers at 17) and then I speak eloquently about what I'm feeling, they realize that its serious, but they think I have a handle on it. I read alot, I try to understand what's going on with my body. I've read so many books about depression that I know other people feel this way, so maybe I'm not as freaked out about it as doctors/therapist would expect me to be? I don't walk in looking like an emotional wreck. But that doesn't mean its not lurking behind the calm demeaner and well polished style. When I get these reactions from the healthcare professionals from whom I seek counsel, I generally begin to feel that its easier to pretend I'm ok, than to try so hard to convince them of my symptoms. Because that IS what I have to do - I have to say the right words, I have to try to let some of the emotion show in their office. Or they send me on my way, assuring me that I'll be fine once the current semester is over. Then I feel like I must be crazy believing that I have these symptoms. I've been diagnosed as having major or clinical depression, and its been mentioned that I'm most likely borderline bipolar. There has been no official diagnosis of that. Recently I guess my symptoms seem anxiety-related, a new mental health disorder for me.

DesFIP -> RE: More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out (11/11/2008 2:04:58 PM)
I will say that there is a huge genetic component to mood disorders. Most people have family members that aren't quite stable. A second cousin who was a suicide, a great uncle who has been in and out of hospitals, relatives who aren't talked about or welcome anymore. If you draw up a family tree and put all those people and symptoms down you get a lot more respect from the physicians. If I'm at a new doctor's office and it asks for family history I write down: high blood pressure, diabetes Type II, and suicide. It runs throughout the family for the five generations we've been in this country. When I had to sign my then preteen in at a hospital psych ward, I didn't get any of that nonsense about I was a bad parent, someone must have abused her etc. None of that is true - they saw the family history and realized this was a true biochemical disorder.

califsue -> RE: More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out (11/11/2008 2:18:53 PM)
In 2004 when I moved from California to New Mexico, quit a job/career of 10 plus years to be with someone who I thought was my soul mate only to have him take off in the middle of the day six weeks later - and overdrew my bank account and left me holding the basket and all the bills put me in a state that took me close to 2 years or more to recover from. It also left me with anger that at times still rears it ugly head due to the financial situation I find myself in these days. In hindsight, I should have sought mental health counseling. I ended moving back home with my parents but fought depression and feeling like and thinking of way to end my life for six months before I moved back home and then was unemployed for close to two years. What helped me, was just continuing to working on and processing my emotions, reaching into my spiritual place and continued prayer and special hand holding from my younger sister and a couple friends. I have always had times in my life when I struggle with depression. I have been on Prozac but that doesn't really seem to help me much so I don't take it. Even now I am dealing with a situation and I can tell it is affecting me as I am tending to withdraw more, stopped caring as much as I did about things, doing my exercises and eating more. I keep asking God to kick start me again...and am working on getting back to where I was but it is not easy. I wish you the best and you find the help and resources that may be needed.

lovingpet -> RE: More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out (11/11/2008 5:22:52 PM)
Thanks to all who are responding. I hate that I have not been able to keep on top of this thread the way I would like. It is always a strange thing to me what losses of function or otherwise are considered unacceptable to a person and motivates hard change. These are the kinds of things that I want to be able to use to "entice" for a lack of a better term someone reluctant to begin treatment. Often it is not that a person does not want help, but feel to overwhelmed to start what is a tough process from start to finish (if there ever is an end). Came4U... as a reassurance, I am not the one in need of help or trying to push a friend or relative into therapy. I am in the field and it is important to me to know what values clients have and what matters when it comes to quality of life. I know that therapy is rarely, if ever, effective when it is not entered into of free will. If a client has been talked into being there or if it has been mandated in some way, I know I have a tough road ahead. I just want to know what specific things make the shift from this being a bad way to feel to it just being too painful and completely unacceptable to ignore anymore. What does a person value that they do not want to lose to such demons? Hope this clarification helps. I know it was a bit obscure to understand as I was trying to piece it together here. Again thanks one and all for your responses! lovingpet

synningsub -> RE: More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out (11/11/2008 6:28:41 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lovingpet What does a person value that they do not want to lose to such demons? this is a question ive gotten from alot of therapists in my 20 odd yrs of treatment.. i try to let them know that theses so-called demons are all ive ever known.. even though others are more than ready to make changes (even huge ones), ive always had issues with the unknown so any change to what i already know is difficult.. i liken it to entering a scarey forest and living there for many yrs.. its dark but youve been all thru it and know every inch.. when someone comes along and tells you that just beyond that, theres a light airy place with nice ppl its hard to believe, accept and even harder to muster up the courage to go out of that forest youve known so well and chance that maybe all thats there is more forest you dont even know.. hope that helps you get a perspective.. i must admit that i admire the fact that you even bother trying to get that inside view.. i dont think alot of therapists do that

OneMoreWaste -> RE: More Than a Bad Mood: From the Inside Out (11/11/2008 7:36:33 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MsLadySue Having nightmares about the office. Hearing the alarm ring in the morning and my stomach turning at the thought of going to work. A feeling of dread the minute I walked into the office building. Seriously, that's not normal? [:-] I finally went for help when I realized that I wasn't acting correctly anymore. I was driving home from work in my pickup, and crying, and thinking about how if I'd taken the bike instead then that would be the day that I finally had the nerve to wind it all the way out and bury it in a tree on the long curve headed back to the main road, then arguing with myself about how that was bullshit, and I was just making excuses for being chicken... And realizing that everything was actually going relatively well for me at the time and that there was no reason for me to be depressed at all. That was a pretty clear sign that I was fucked.

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