RE: Want opinions on this please (Full Version)

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RealSub58 -> RE: Want opinions on this please (11/22/2008 9:17:10 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mystickoolaid

I'm not sure if this is the correct place for this  thread or not... but anyhow... I was talking to a potential sub and he told me he was 'sunstrapped'. I had never heard of this before, so I asked what it was. This is the response I got:

that is where i was made to lay out in sun till i was sunburned...then my owner took a thin leather belt and whpped my back FULL FORCE over the sunburned back, about 100 lashes usually...it was for SEVERE punishments ...i hated it, but i admit it has humbled me more

What do you guys think? Reasonable punishment or abuse?



Return the jesture and the shithead would have called the police.




ODadEO -> RE: Want opinions on this please (11/22/2008 9:17:44 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CallaFirestormBW

... We dont' even know that this actually -happened-, and yet someone's reputation could be completely ruined based on peoples' speculations and interference.


quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

And far too many reputations get ruined by hearsay.


Yes, I agree with you both -- I am not one to jump to conclusions, I am only stating that behavior as stated by the OP (if it is true) is not just wrong, but negligently so.  I am not advocating a black-listing site or some such thing, but still, some people need to be outed for things they pull.  But I agree, proof needs to be had, not just assertions or rumors.




mystickoolaid -> RE: Want opinions on this please (11/22/2008 9:20:38 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

quote:

ORIGINAL: mystickoolaid
It wasn't ALL chatroom drama. He actually offered to have her call me but I'm weird about my phone number. Like I just said, we'd been talking for a while before any of this came out.


I beg to differ. This was all info gleaned through you meeting this guy in an internet chat room. You might have even spoken to him on the phone but that was never made clear. You only spoke to her online. You don't know any of these people in real life. I was responding to ODadEO's assertion that there should be some blacklisting happening. Over what? Some type on a screen? Possibly a voice on a telephone? I'm sorry but even if the guy was standing right in front of me bearing scars it still wouldn't give me all of the facts.


I didn't meet him in the chat room. I actually don't frequent the chat here. The only time that I had anything to do with a chat room was when he supposedly had her come to talk to me, which doesn't really offer proof of anything... it could have been anyone. But 'she' does have a profile here which is all filled out and includes pics and the whole shebang. Seems like a waste of time for some kind of elaborate scam just to get pity to me.




mystickoolaid -> RE: Want opinions on this please (11/22/2008 9:24:37 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ODadEO

quote:

ORIGINAL: CallaFirestormBW

... We dont' even know that this actually -happened-, and yet someone's reputation could be completely ruined based on peoples' speculations and interference.


quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

And far too many reputations get ruined by hearsay.


Yes, I agree with you both -- I am not one to jump to conclusions, I am only stating that behavior as stated by the OP (if it is true) is not just wrong, but negligently so.  I am not advocating a black-listing site or some such thing, but still, some people need to be outed for things they pull.  But I agree, proof needs to be had, not just assertions or rumors.



I supposedly talked to this person via chat (who does have an identity here complete with pics and a full profile) whoever the person owning the name and profile is admitted to doing it and was pissed that I question her methods. This is all SUPPOSEDLY what happened. Either way it wouldnt be totally out of the question to blacklist this person as they are either a 12 year old POSING as an overly harsh Master, or they truly are this evil.

That's the only thing that even had anything to do with a chat room, as I apparently need to keep reiterating.




RedMagic1 -> RE: Want opinions on this please (11/22/2008 9:50:27 AM)

Reporting someone to support for abuse of the service is not the same as blacklisting.  If you think someone c-mailing or chatting with you is clearly underage, or otherwise violating the terms of service of the site, please report it to the Support button on the other side.  Blacklisting gets into a nasty area, where people say, "Watch out for that mystickoolaid.  I offered to lick her feet and she wouldn't let me.  She's fake.  Her photo is too pixelated and she didn't capitalize her nick."

Also, you will go crazy trying to keep a thread on a single topic.  I would suggest letting the conversation go more or less in the direction it flows, understanding that it is not a personal jab against you if people change the subject.




mystickoolaid -> RE: Want opinions on this please (11/22/2008 9:51:38 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

Reporting someone to support for abuse of the service is not the same as blacklisting.  If you think someone c-mailing or chatting with you is clearly underage, or otherwise violating the terms of service of the site, please report it to the Support button on the other side.  Blacklisting gets into a nasty area, where people say, "Watch out for that mystickoolaid.  I offered to lick her feet and she wouldn't let me.  She's fake.  Her photo is too pixelated and she didn't capitalize her nick."

Also, you will go crazy trying to keep a thread on a single topic.  I would suggest letting the conversation go more or less in the direction it flows, understanding that it is not a personal jab against you if people change the subject.



I fixed my pic. Go check it out. :)




RedMagic1 -> RE: Want opinions on this please (11/22/2008 9:56:29 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mystickoolaid
I fixed my pic. Go check it out. :)

Yum![8D]




agirl -> RE: Want opinions on this please (11/22/2008 12:00:03 PM)

 Half of the people posting here would be *evil* if their methods and actions were up for scrutiny by the other half.

It seems extreme to YOU , it's not something YOU would do, it's not something YOU would condone ....... that doesn't make it in the least bit abusive.

And as mistoferin said ...... a reputation can be damaged by hearsay crap...and in my experience...... the *subbie* version is generally the one voiced.

There is abuse and there is abuse.........and one form is dissing with a one sided account of a situation.

agirl






mystickoolaid -> RE: Want opinions on this please (11/22/2008 12:09:54 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: agirl

 Half of the people posting here would be *evil* if their methods and actions were up for scrutiny by the other half.

It seems extreme to YOU , it's not something YOU would do, it's not something YOU would condone ....... that doesn't make it in the least bit abusive.

And as mistoferin said ...... a reputation can be damaged by hearsay crap...and in my experience...... the *subbie* version is generally the one voiced.

There is abuse and there is abuse.........and one form is dissing with a one sided account of a situation.

agirl





He didn't enjoy it, and supposedly  "she" admitted to doing it. I think the treatment of a sub/slave should make the relationship enjoyable and  agreeable to both, but some Dominants would disagree with me.

Thanks for your opinion.




LadyConstanze -> RE: Want opinions on this please (11/22/2008 12:38:34 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordi71

If he is not joking or its a fanatsy I would say that it was a very dangerous thing to do. I would tend to use deep heat instead of sun becasue the effects of the sun would last for a very long time, where deep heat cream can be lessend using cold milk, which reduces any kind of chemical burn.






You'll have more luck with Arnica but deep heat will only use a chemical burn if you are allergic, otherwise it is temporary very unpleasant and all it does is increase the blood circulation in the area, hence the heating up of skin.




mystickoolaid -> RE: Want opinions on this please (11/22/2008 12:59:15 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze


quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordi71

If he is not joking or its a fanatsy I would say that it was a very dangerous thing to do. I would tend to use deep heat instead of sun becasue the effects of the sun would last for a very long time, where deep heat cream can be lessend using cold milk, which reduces any kind of chemical burn.






You'll have more luck with Arnica but deep heat will only use a chemical burn if you are allergic, otherwise it is temporary very unpleasant and all it does is increase the blood circulation in the area, hence the heating up of skin.


Is that similar to icy hot?




Icarys -> RE: Want opinions on this please (11/22/2008 3:40:06 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mystickoolaid

quote:

ORIGINAL: agirl

 Half of the people posting here would be *evil* if their methods and actions were up for scrutiny by the other half.

It seems extreme to YOU , it's not something YOU would do, it's not something YOU would condone ....... that doesn't make it in the least bit abusive.

And as mistoferin said ...... a reputation can be damaged by hearsay crap...and in my experience...... the *subbie* version is generally the one voiced.

There is abuse and there is abuse.........and one form is dissing with a one sided account of a situation.

agirl





He didn't enjoy it, and supposedly  "she" admitted to doing it. I think the treatment of a sub/slave should make the relationship enjoyable and  agreeable to both, but some Dominants would disagree with me.

Thanks for your opinion.


I disagree with you. Why should it be. I've done things for my enjoyment alone. I've also done things that didn't do anything for me but she enjoyed it. My choice, if I don't want to do it then i won't. Can't say the same for her but that's how it goes.




mystickoolaid -> RE: Want opinions on this please (11/22/2008 3:58:46 PM)

You were both also consenting to those things. It's give and take. And these kind of dynamics need to be discussed in full as to what is expected from both parties. Doing something to 'treat' someone else wasn't included in what I said. 




mystickoolaid -> RE: Want opinions on this please (11/22/2008 4:00:00 PM)

Also, I was generalizing. No good Dominant wants their sub to be miserable with the whole relationship. Unhappiness with certain aspects is to be expected at times.




Aszhrae -> RE: Want opinions on this please (11/22/2008 4:14:57 PM)

After reading the entire thread, girl believes that the use of deep heating rub which can be soothed after by cold milk is a reasonable punishment, the use of dhr and slaps is reasonable, girl is certain.
Slapping someone foolish enough not to wear sunblock deserves to be slapped by their dominant upon the affected area, that way the sub/slave is not as foolish next time.

Putting someone outside to get roasted is not only stupid, it's dangerous. Heatstroke is not nice, even worse is the hint of neglect involved, any dominant that would do such a thing to a sub/slave should really have their head examined or another dominant to take their sub/slave away from them as they are without a doubt irresponsible and do not deserve to have a sub/slave.

Personally speaking, there have been situations going out with master and laboring for him has resulted in girl getting buried up to the neck in loose dirt, placed in a container with a supply of clean air and vented that could easily be compared to a hotbox or even put into situations of high risk, but then again, that was girl's choice and akin to RACK. Just as it is girl's choice to put self in harm's way to keep master and mistress from fighting or trying to keep mistress from harm.

But what was described sounds more like abuse.




Maya2001 -> RE: Want opinions on this please (11/22/2008 4:39:53 PM)

Icy hot would be similar

sign up to fetlife.com and pay attention to some of the sub photos   especially of the female butts   and in some cases breasts

some are extremely bruised , but there are others that are shredded and bloody...many would tell you it was painful and not enjoyable at the time but they display their wounded butts as badges of honor  and are proud  of them having done this for their Dom/me  and you  will see comments below from both subs and Doms of congratulations  and pleasures at beholding the sight of.
Some of us would view this as too extreme and abusive  for ourselves  but if you ask them , they would disagree with that ..that is the level they like to play at and it is not abuse as long as they consent too.   Some people also get off on mental sadism or mind fucks  which could include suggestive outing,  sugg estive public display/humiliation/degradation within private play without actual intent to do so.. as the suggestive imagery of doing is enough of get off on and creates the big O .

when I was younger ..there was no talk of cancer related to sunburns, and I used to be extremely active in water sports starting a a very young age (competitive and recreational swimming, boating, waterskiing, sailboarding, bodysurfing  etc) so pretty much at the start of very season  I would end up burnt  sometimes several times in the same season before getting enough of a tan to stop burning some more extreme than others, even milder sun burns  will hurt and burn later the first day without any real skin damage occuring after,  sometimes you cannot tell how extreme the burn is till a couple days later when the skin swelling remains and the oozing and blistering starts...so the Domme might have timed it for a mild burn  but the the belting it might have made it feel  more severe than it truly was... so how  the skin reacts over the next 2 or 3 days  is the key to how severe the burn really was.

now getting a sunburn may not be a good idea but skin cancer  due to sun usually is a result of repetitive  burns to the  skin that has cause damage below the skin surface  so one incident is not likely to result in getting cancer....most of what we do involves some level of risk or a level of damage..  just as temporarily cutting off circulation  or impact play which involves varying amounts of capillary damage, abrasions which damages surface cells and yet we do consent to having some damage done when playing .. though the levels of damage varies from to person to what they will consent to and we decide what is an acceptablelevel  for us...not by what others deem as acceptable...if we chose to follow the acceptable  by the majority of the population then most BDSM activities would cease to exist




mystickoolaid -> RE: Want opinions on this please (11/22/2008 4:42:20 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Maya2001

  Some people also get off on mental sadism or mind fucks  which could include suggestive outing,  sugg estive public display/humiliation/degradation within private play without actual intent to do so.. as the suggestive imagery of doing is enough of get off on and creates the big O .




This wasnt an idle threat. (If it was real... sorry I keep having to say that so people dont start with bashing me for believing it, which I never professed to)




CelticPrince -> RE: Want opinions on this please (11/22/2008 4:49:03 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mystickoolaid

I'm not sure if this is the correct place for this  thread or not... but anyhow... I was talking to a potential sub and he told me he was 'sunstrapped'. I had never heard of this before, so I asked what it was. This is the response I got:

that is where i was made to lay out in sun till i was sunburned...then my owner took a thin leather belt and whpped my back FULL FORCE over the sunburned back, about 100 lashes usually...it was for SEVERE punishments ...i hated it, but i admit it has humbled me more

What do you guys think? Reasonable punishment or abuse?

ABUSE!

CP





Icarys -> RE: Want opinions on this please (11/22/2008 5:06:21 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mystickoolaid

You were both also consenting to those things. It's give and take. And these kind of dynamics need to be discussed in full as to what is expected from both parties. Doing something to 'treat' someone else wasn't included in what I said. 

Mine consents to me one time from her trust. Once that happens, all things flow to me. She trust that I won't harm her. I don't discuss anything after that unless I so choose to. Now there is, if she's done something wrong, dialogue about what her punishment will be and why but there's no input to what she thinks is okay.

I know it wasn't added in what you said.. I added it.




Icarys -> RE: Want opinions on this please (11/22/2008 5:14:44 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Maya2001

Icy hot would be similar

sign up to fetlife.com and pay attention to some of the sub photos   especially of the female butts   and in some cases breasts

some are extremely bruised , but there are others that are shredded and bloody...many would tell you it was painful and not enjoyable at the time but they display their wounded butts as badges of honor  and are proud  of them having done this for their Dom/me  and you  will see comments below from both subs and Doms of congratulations  and pleasures at beholding the sight of.
Some of us would view this as too extreme and abusive  for ourselves  but if you ask them , they would disagree with that ..that is the level they like to play at and it is not abuse as long as they consent too.   Some people also get off on mental sadism or mind fucks  which could include suggestive outing,  sugg estive public display/humiliation/degradation within private play without actual intent to do so.. as the suggestive imagery of doing is enough of get off on and creates the big O .

when I was younger ..there was no talk of cancer related to sunburns, and I used to be extremely active in water sports starting a a very young age (competitive and recreational swimming, boating, waterskiing, sailboarding, bodysurfing  etc) so pretty much at the start of very season  I would end up burnt  sometimes several times in the same season before getting enough of a tan to stop burning some more extreme than others, even milder sun burns  will hurt and burn later the first day without any real skin damage occuring after,  sometimes you cannot tell how extreme the burn is till a couple days later when the skin swelling remains and the oozing and blistering starts...so the Domme might have timed it for a mild burn  but the the belting it might have made it feel  more severe than it truly was... so how  the skin reacts over the next 2 or 3 days  is the key to how severe the burn really was.

now getting a sunburn may not be a good idea but skin cancer  due to sun usually is a result of repetitive  burns to the  skin that has cause damage below the skin surface  so one incident is not likely to result in getting cancer....most of what we do involves some level of risk or a level of damage..  just as temporarily cutting off circulation  or impact play which involves varying amounts of capillary damage, abrasions which damages surface cells and yet we do consent to having some damage done when playing .. though the levels of damage varies from to person to what they will consent to and we decide what is an acceptablelevel  for us...not by what others deem as acceptable...if we chose to follow the acceptable  by the majority of the population then most BDSM activities would cease to exist


Good words.




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