RE: service (Full Version)

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OneMoreWaste -> RE: service (1/14/2009 8:41:21 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
Oh, and bring the marshmellows.


*le sigh*

S'mores marshmallows or hot chocolate marshmallows? [:-]



undergroundsea -> RE: service (1/14/2009 8:46:18 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: beeble
What you should be getting out of the responses is that the Dommes would rather spend three hours doing housework themselves than spend four hours interacting with a a submissive in a really boring way (telling him how to do the housework, pointing out things he's missed) then another hour `punishing' him for doing that housework badly and then another two hours doing the bits of the housework that the sub missed.


Indeed posts in this thread carry the message you summarize. However, the scenario suggested by OMW, or referenced by PFH and myself is different from the one you describe.

quote:

ORIGINAL: ShaktiSama
On the other hand, there is also a matter of providing ME with "extra buzz", and with a special feeling of being loved and served. And generally that feeling comes not from ORDERING him to serve me and being obeyed--it comes from having my needs anticipated correctly, because he has taken the time to learn my ways well enough. Or from an expressed desire to serve me in some way, because he can see that I am tired or distracted and stressed.


I agree entirely. I think the two scenarios--a domme giving an order towards service and a submissive providing anticipatory service or service as an expression of regard--are not mutually exclusive. In my opinion, a relationship that has both has greater energy than one that has only one or the other. A sub may contribute by obeying orders (being responsive to an action initiated by the other) or anticipating needs (initiating). A domme may contribute by giving orders (initiating) or accepting service (being responsive to an action initiated by the other). I think the point that PFH is referencing, and one I often reference, is how a domme can initiate a contribution to the D/s dynamic in the medium of service.

I think the core matter is that there should be an ongoing reciprocation of energy and each person should contribute to the dynamic. Your comments about your relationship suggest that this reciprocation occurs, for which I congratulate you.

Cheers,

Sea



undergroundsea -> RE: service (1/14/2009 8:55:03 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
 how damn hard is it to make an egg?


It is not hard to make an egg and, therefore, I propose that dominants should make an egg for the submissives the next morning. I mean, can't we get a little extended aftercare?

;-)

The evening you describe is a good example of how each person contributes to the dynamic. And when this mutual participation occurs, there is not a need to say that one flogged the other so now the other should make breakfast, or that one made breakfast for the other and so now the other should reciprocate by giving a flogging.

Cheers,

Sea



LadyPact -> RE: service (1/15/2009 12:25:45 AM)

Thanks to those who liked that little blurb.  I was kind of wondering if it was going to sound weekend warriorish.

Otters, actually I wasn't fighting dirty in the least.  It was nice to sit here and think of how clip and I have spent some of those Sunday mornings.  Since clip is the morning person and MisterP always sleeps late after an outing, clip's usually got breakfast going.  MisterP isn't a breakfast person so clip and I just get to spend time together.  I'm sure I look like something of a twit just grinning at him some mornings.

LadyH, play or no play, everybody should have time in their life for eggs.  Most important meal of the day and all that.

OMW, another story from the real life of Lady Pact file.  I had the greatest cup of hot chocolate on New Year's Eve after MisterP and I had co topped  a gal together.  My head was still buzzing after the scene and we had stepped out into the night air.  It was just the powdered stuff with the tiny marsh mellows but at that moment, it was so perfect and it was delicious.  It probably took clip all of two minutes to make it for Me and the bottom after the scene but it was so good.  Best tasting cup of hot chocolate I had in a long time.

Sea, I don't know if I'm really appealing to that service side of you or not on the other side of the screen.  I really am happy those mornings after.  There's the matter of the feet that are still sore after wearing those boots that I play in and the much more comfortable attire of a silk robe rather than the corset and skirt.  It's one of those times that clip's just taking care of Me because he'll know I'm still floaty that next morning and left to My own devices, I'll forget to eat.  One of the easiest ways for Me to set Myself up for drop later in the day if I don't.  Just about anyone who's played with Me knows that they have to remind Me to eat the next day.  I'm great at reminding other people to eat, make sure they rehydrate, and get enough rest.  I'm terrible about doing it Myself.  It's his way of taking care of Me because he cares about My well being.  Not because he had to be ordered to do it.

Edited because I can't seem to spell when I'm thinking of happy memories.



MsStarlett -> RE: service (1/15/2009 3:49:41 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: undergroundsea

It is not hard to make an egg and, therefore, I propose that dominants should make an egg for the submissives the next morning. I mean, can't we get a little extended aftercare?

;-)


I have actually been known to get breakfast for my Westie in the morning.  Mainly because he does not know his way around my kitchen yet.  However, he IS expected to keep my coffee cup full.



PeonForHer -> RE: service (1/15/2009 3:59:28 AM)

Just about anyone who's played with Me knows that they have to remind Me to eat the next day. 
 
This is bad.  No wonder clip makes your breakfast.  I hate the thought of people not eating.



OttersSwim -> RE: service (1/15/2009 7:34:06 AM)

No no, LadyPact, no worries.  [:D]  PforH and I were hoping to start a little fake flame war of banter and your great post defused us.  It does sound very nice and I am glad that you have people in your life who care for you so.  [:)]



FullfigRIMAAM1 -> RE: service (1/15/2009 7:46:38 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: undergroundsea
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
 how damn hard is it to make an egg?


It is not hard to make an egg and, therefore, I propose that dominants should make an egg for the submissives the next morning. I mean, can't we get a little extended aftercare?
Sea
[sm=rofl.gif] Nice to see you've got jokes Sea. I will actually get a boy that I've worn out something to drink or maybe cereal, if we are at my home, but if we are at his place, I'll be generous enough to wait for him to get his bearings, before I send him for a snack or juice. M



PeonForHer -> RE: service (1/15/2009 8:13:27 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: OttersSwim

No no, LadyPact, no worries.  [:D]  PforH and I were hoping to start a little fake flame war of banter and your great post defused us.  It does sound very nice and I am glad that you have people in your life who care for you so.  [:)]



You yellowbelly, Otters!



OttersSwim -> RE: service (1/15/2009 9:18:24 AM)

Yea...ratted us both out.  We probably deserve to be PFunished for our deplorable behavior, don't you think P?   [;)]



PeonForHer -> RE: service (1/15/2009 9:23:52 AM)

At least you didn't go "wah, Peon put me up to it, it was all his idea!", you milksop.

And yes, indeed I do agree.[;)]



beeble -> RE: service (1/15/2009 9:28:08 AM)

Oo!  Oo!  Is this about to become a `forced bi' thread? *grin*

beeble



Venatrix -> RE: service (1/15/2009 11:26:50 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: FullfigRIMAAM1

I will actually get a boy that I've worn out something to drink or maybe cereal, if we are at my home, but if we are at his place, I'll be generous enough to wait for him to get his bearings, before I send him for a snack or juice. M


I once played with someone who had gone heavily into subspace and insisted he didn't need food or drink afterwards.  I insisted he did.  Whilst I made ravioli in vodka-tomato sauce, he proceeded to drink an entire litre of fizzy water, then polished off a large plate of pasta with a salad, *then* asked if there was any more.  So much for not being hungry or thirsty.  Domina really does know best. [;)]

Edited to add:  I had so much adrenalin pumping through me after that scene, I probably could have cooked for an army platoon.  I bet the D-types know what I mean.



LadyPact -> RE: service (1/15/2009 12:36:23 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: beeble

Oo!  Oo!  Is this about to become a `forced bi' thread? *grin*

beeble



Yep.  Got My attention again.



Lockit -> RE: service (1/15/2009 12:38:37 PM)

LOL... Otter and Peon... SAM's in crime... this I want to see!



beargonewild -> RE: service (1/15/2009 12:39:53 PM)

Am I allowed to watch? I'll supply the refreshments.



Lockit -> RE: service (1/15/2009 12:41:50 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: beargonewild

Am I allowed to watch? I'll supply the refreshments.


You could man the video camera!



LadyPact -> RE: service (1/15/2009 12:41:55 PM)

I've been saying that about the "seeing" for some time.  Yet, still no action shots have hit My mail.



beargonewild -> RE: service (1/15/2009 12:45:13 PM)

Thanks! I'll be unobtrusive as possible, can't risk getting in anyone's radar...hahahahaha



LadyPact -> RE: service (1/15/2009 12:50:09 PM)

Too late.



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