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RE: BDSM and University - 1/21/2006 1:10:58 AM   
CmotDribbler


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I plan to make a career out of being a college proffesor, and my Kitten wants to be a Sex therapist, give us time we will get one going :D

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RE: BDSM and University - 1/21/2006 6:50:29 AM   
thetammyjo


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quote:

ORIGINAL: KittenWithaTwist

As a personal note, I wouldn't feel comfortable being a part of an on-campus BDSM group. I would not wish to be "out" among my peers while trying to compete for scholarships, internships, and career opportunities. If the group was community based and not involved in the Associated Student Body, I would consider joining them while studying.

However, everyone has different opinions.



Based on my experience in both types of groups I can say that I have seen much more enpowerment come from University groups for students than when the try to get involved in a community.

The number issues is age -- many community groups don't allow members until age 21 and they charge money based on membership status (no membership, you pay more). Money can be the second issue for college students.

There's really no more risk be out on campus with a BDSM group than there is if you are part of any university group. In fact, probably less because unlike many other groups who might have fund raisers and very public events most BDSM university groups I've been in and known about tend to value privacy over anything else.

That being said you may be as out as you like with or without a group. With a group you have peer you can talk to and hang with. So the group may sponser a slave auction for AIDS education on campus (Conversio Virium does this I see or has in the past) or you can just have weekly discussion sessions or you can have in big name guests or you can have off-campus play parties (be careful Rutgers had an on-campus one and got into trouble). None of these events require you attendance however, that's a choice.

You have to do what you are comfortable with first and foremost.

From my experience I'd say that students will feel more connected and more empowered when they have their own groups. This is by no means saying they shouldn't reach out and learn from others with more experience just that I've heard enough age bashing to know that sometimes you need those big encompassing groups and sometimes you need smaller ones.


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RE: BDSM and University - 1/21/2006 3:46:10 PM   
Petruchio


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The University of Washington in Seattle sponsored sexuality seminars, including BDSM.

I think Ohio State University did something similar.

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Profile   Post #: 43
RE: BDSM and University - 1/21/2006 4:16:49 PM   
Slipstreme


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quote:

I plan to make a career out of being a college proffesor, and my Kitten wants to be a Sex therapist, give us time we will get one going :D


Too bad you arent Gainesville Fl! I would love to start one here on campus at UF. But alas, I do not know of many students and those I know would be too afraid of the backlash that might occur once said group is created. Alas, you need backing, you can't do it alone. Although, I know, once made, people would come. After all, college is the time of experimentation, and I know I can't possibly be the only person on the UF campus into BDSM enough to seek mentoring and help in my exploration.

After all, it was finally given mention in Campus Talk magazine. *Yay!* Maybe others will find the site, www.mybdsm.com/pages the columnist posted interesting enough to explore.

< Message edited by Slipstreme -- 1/21/2006 4:20:27 PM >


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Profile   Post #: 44
RE: BDSM and University - 1/22/2006 9:18:26 PM   
Wolfie648


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Giddyup,

Going to remove quotes as it's at that point...disagree with me if you (whomever) like. (W6)

In just what way am I misrepresenting myself? (JW)

** I don't take issue with being paid or losing money. I take issue with misrepresentation - which it seemed to me you were doing.** (W6)

please note the word and tense of SEEMED (W6)

I repeat. In what way do you think I "seem" to be misrepresenting myself? Personal attacks should at least be specific enough so one can defend one's self. (JW)

Original attack (JW)

Perceived attack. (W6)

As presented it sounded like you promoting yourself (which I have no issue with) by ***orig intent was to put it _but_ not _by_*** misrepresentation (which I do have issue with).** (W6)

To answer the repeated question I will answer one more time in a deflective manner. If you, John, do ask me a third time I will answer directly. (W6)

So my answer at the moment is: There's a tale I heard about a few times when younger about Hansel and Gretel. (W6)

Consider Japanese as well. (W6)

D (owner of j)




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RE: BDSM and University - 1/22/2006 10:02:47 PM   
LessThanKate


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I know exactly what you're saying about UF, it sucks that the age limit is 21 around here.

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Profile   Post #: 46
RE: BDSM and University - 1/23/2006 4:34:16 AM   
JohnWarren


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To answer the repeated question I will answer one more time in a deflective manner. If you, John, do ask me a third time I will answer directly. (W6)

So my answer at the moment is: There's a tale I heard about a few times when younger about Hansel and Gretel. (W6)

Consider Japanese as well. (W6)

D (owner of j)



[/quote]

Consider it asked directly


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RE: BDSM and University - 1/23/2006 10:26:43 AM   
Wolfie648


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quote:

Consider it asked directly


To answer you directly, I have already answered you indirectly in my 1st and 2nd reply (not posts on this topic) to you.

Either you

a) already knew this or
b) didn't.

D (owner of j)

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RE: BDSM and University - 1/23/2006 10:36:20 AM   
KittenWithaTwist


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O.M.F.G

Shut up already and stay on the flipping topic. GEESH!

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Profile   Post #: 49
RE: BDSM and University - 1/23/2006 3:26:22 PM   
JohnWarren


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From: Delray Beach, FL
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[
quote:

ORIGINAL: Wolfie648
To answer the repeated question I will answer one more time in a deflective manner. If you, John, do ask me a third time I will answer directly. (W6)


quote:

Original: JohnWarren
Consider it asked directly


quote:

ORIGINAL: Wolfie648

To answer you directly, I have already answered you indirectly in my 1st and 2nd reply (not posts on this topic) to you.

Either you

a) already knew this or
b) didn't.

D (owner of j)


I have no idea of what you are talking about. How about a link to those " 1st and 2nd reply (not posts on this topic)". I would like to know how you feel that I've been misrepresenting myself.

< Message edited by JohnWarren -- 1/23/2006 3:33:42 PM >


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RE: BDSM and University - 1/23/2006 11:13:05 PM   
Wolfie648


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quote:

I have no idea of what you are talking about. How about a link to those " 1st and 2nd reply (not posts on this topic)". I would like to know how you feel that I've been misrepresenting myself.


John,

I am going to PM this to you (something other than the circular references). If you would like to post what I send to you here on this thread afterwards, please feel free.

D (owner of j)



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Profile   Post #: 51
RE: BDSM and University - 1/24/2006 4:10:29 AM   
JohnWarren


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Wolfie648

quote:

I have no idea of what you are talking about. How about a link to those " 1st and 2nd reply (not posts on this topic)". I would like to know how you feel that I've been misrepresenting myself.


John,

I am going to PM this to you (something other than the circular references). If you would like to post what I send to you here on this thread afterwards, please feel free.

D (owner of j)





While I feel that quoting a private email is out of bounds, I'll mention here that Wolfie failed to substantiate his accusations any better in email than he did in the public forum.

I guess the subject is closed.

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Profile   Post #: 52
RE: BDSM and University - 1/24/2006 1:22:09 PM   
Wolfie648


Posts: 600
Joined: 9/14/2005
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quote:

While I feel that quoting a private email is out of bounds, I'll mention here that Wolfie failed to substantiate his accusations any better in email than he did in the public forum.

I guess the subject is closed.


While I feel that quoting a private e-mail (or both now) that I _allowed_ you (publicly and privately) to, I'll mention here that Wolfie (as I see it) did in fact substantiate his accusations (which Wolfie has already taken back (for those interested in our little tiny drama, I refer you to my second post on this thread - for those like John that missed it I refer you to my additional replies (on the forum - unless he posts my 2 PM's, in which case I would refer you to them as well) to John attemting to focus his attention on exactly how and what I was talking about).

I guess the subject is closed!

D (owner of j)

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Profile   Post #: 53
RE: BDSM and University - 1/24/2006 1:37:29 PM   
HoosierScorpio


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Spacehippie I know of several universities that have lifestyle groups all over the country. There was on group called CUFF and they had to fight for their rights to assemble not sure what happen with them. Then another group I know kind of feel an apart because allots of regulars graduated and it is in limbo right now. You can form a munch and education group but you must be aware of university policy for if you do a flogging Demo they could accuse you of abuse which some university have in their code of conduct bylaws and kick you out. Your best bet is to set it up as a munch group and meet off campus to be safe. Another possibility you could go to the student affairs office and inquire if you could set up a group on campus and you could get funds. Also you would need a faulty to be your advisor to help you create the group. I would check for local munch groups that will allow those who are 18 attend and see if they could help you set up a college age munch. Good Luck HoosierScorpio.

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Profile   Post #: 54
RE: BDSM and University - 1/26/2006 12:58:13 AM   
Lordandmaster


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Yes, and 35-year-olds probably aren't going to be invited, so I'd bet you're safe.

quote:

ORIGINAL: amayos

Oh yes, we do need a snooty collegiate BDSM organization. Think of all the unending pseudo-intellectual debates and elitist little sub-clubs that could be made.

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Profile   Post #: 55
RE: BDSM and University - 1/26/2006 1:44:54 AM   
RumpusParable


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Oh nevermind, what I said is obvious.

< Message edited by RumpusParable -- 1/26/2006 1:48:48 AM >

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RE: BDSM and University - 1/26/2006 4:13:34 AM   
FantMstr


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Some broad and disjointed comments to this whole thread -

1) Yes, play by the rules if you are going to form a group on campus. Don't expect it to be easy for three reasons: 1) the moral atmosphere and image the college/university tries to portray, 2) "fear” of parental backlash and 3) and especially because of the normal college bureaucratic BS.

2) State and local laws can be very different and problematic, example in MA it was (I think it still is) illegal to spank anyone, even consensually. This should make next week's flea interesting.

3) Money - exchange of money for sexual activities is illegal in almost all jurisdictions. That does not have to be you paying he/she for sex. Sexual activity at the event can get the men in blue to visit under the prostitution laws. And yes that can be an “admission charge.”

4) There was at least one such "on-line" educational institution out of Europe. It didn't take off, as many people really don't want the knowledge (especially if they have to pay for it). They want a quick lesson in how to have fun.

5) In easy driving distance to almost any place (campus or town) there is a munch of some sort. You can get out and get to talk to people. From there you start to build your knowledge and network. Google it and you will find it.

Having said the above, I do think that the young college population does have a set of distinct needs that they need to discuss with their peers. IMHO, this can be done in some form of on-line community.

For anyone at the flea this week-end, see you there.

Fantasy Mstr

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Profile   Post #: 57
RE: BDSM and University - 1/26/2006 5:19:12 AM   
JohnWarren


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From: Delray Beach, FL
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quote:

ORIGINAL: FantMstr

2) State and local laws can be very different and problematic, example in MA it was (I think it still is) illegal to spank anyone, even consensually. This should make next week's flea interesting.


The operational law here is a State Supreme Court decision that ruled consent was not a defense in assault. In the case on point a man was convicted of assaulting his lover with a riding crop so the rule of thumb seems to be that some sort of implement is needed.

However, during the Paddleboro case charges were dropped against Stefany Reed who had been charged based on this precedent. There have been a number of opportunities for various police departments to use the precedent since then and they have failed to exercise the option.

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Profile   Post #: 58
RE: BDSM and University - 1/26/2006 6:41:36 AM   
thetammyjo


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

Yes, and 35-year-olds probably aren't going to be invited, so I'd bet you're safe.

quote:

ORIGINAL: amayos

Oh yes, we do need a snooty collegiate BDSM organization. Think of all the unending pseudo-intellectual debates and elitist little sub-clubs that could be made.



Actually in order for a group to get university or college recognition it couldn't descriminate on something like age, race, gender, sex, income, etc.

Only on tie to the university.

It could be limited to only students (who by the way include a lot of ages).

It could be limited to only folks with a university/college ID (thus open to staff, faculty, and administrators).

I have worked with two such groups and know about several others and have talked with those other groups leaders over the years.

Just to address the previous post from HoosierScorpio, campus groups fall apart for many of the same reasons other groups do. Personal issues, focus on play over running the thing so that nothing gets done, breaking the rules (universities/colleges have their own rules so make sure you follow them), funding not matching desired programs, and burn-out of those who took the time to try and make the group work. To this I'll add my own personal opinion that when a college/university group allows or relies too heavily on non-university/college people it will die out because it starts to ignore the core group it must have to continue campus recognition and funding (if it gets any).

Yes, university/college groups can be limiting in terms of "fun thing" you can do -- I can't think of a single university/college that would allow play parties oncampus because of liabity itssue for example. But they can also be places where the freedom to speak is protected (private colleges/universities can limit that more) and where you can get technology and space for meetings. Because most universities/college do not allow discrimination you can also get a wider variety of people and therefore viewpoints (some might consider this a "bad" cause they prefer being with folks most similar to themselves).

While I have been burnt-out of the organizations now where I am currently I still heavily favor them. I have know too many people under 21 who want to do BDSM but don't know how to do it and thus end up in situations they'd rather not be in, who think they are going to hell because it must be wrong, and who place themselves in dangerous situations just to get some experience by lying about their age or agreeing to things because they don't know differently.

Yes, that can be the case to anyone of any age but when the vast majority of organizations and event say "21+" then it leaves out the venues that rest of us could find and find a way of going to. I do not personally think it is fair to close off the venues for education and socialization to people who can fight and die for their country, get married, and pay taxes (and other things). College/University groups can help this segment of the population without interfering with other groups or those who want only 21+ in their groups or at their events.

*looks down and sees a soapbox under her feet*
*steps down, shakes head, and walks away*

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

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Profile   Post #: 59
RE: BDSM and University - 1/26/2006 2:14:19 PM   
FantMstr


Posts: 10
Joined: 11/13/2004
From: CT
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

< ... much cut of original post ... >

Yes, that can be the case to anyone of any age but when the vast majority of organizations and event say "21+" then it leaves out the venues that rest of us could find and find a way of going to. I do not personally think it is fair to close off the venues for education and socialization to people who can fight and die for their country, get married, and pay taxes (and other things). College/University groups can help this segment of the population without interfering with other groups or those who want only 21+ in their groups or at their events.

*looks down and sees a soapbox under her feet*
*steps down, shakes head, and walks away*


Trips over soapbox :*)))>

One of the reasons I highly recommend munches is that they normally (no I will not try to define that word) are not 21+ as many/most are vanilla (no play). It is a chance to just meet and munch (socialize and learn) with real people who are dressed like real people. Normally (yes I like that word) there is a group of people at any munch who are not looking for a new "piece of meat" and will watch and warn so that newcomers aren't "swept off their feet" by someone out for only him/herself.

FM pushes the soapbox under a bush so it is available but not in the way.

Fantasy Mstr

(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 60
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