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Actually here is what I meant! - 3/9/2004 1:36:07 AM   
DomCT2002


Posts: 17
Joined: 2/23/2004
Status: offline
You come across very few in the lifestyle in your daily life and on these chat programs is where you really find most of them.

Then when you do meet someone you wish to meet in person and really get to know they are hesitant to meet you or to take a chance.

Life folks is a chance, we take chances everyday in out lives from waking up to going to sleep and all in between. Hesitation usually leads to losing out on the person you may really be interested is what I am referring to. People meet all the time in these chat rooms, from Bondage.com, to here, to Alt.com and Aff.com and other chat programs, but they wait long periods of time to speak up and say they want to meet someone and in the end they lose out.

_____________________________

DomCT2002
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RE: Actually here is what I meant! - 3/9/2004 5:36:42 AM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DomCT2002

You come across very few in the lifestyle in your daily life and on these chat programs is where you really find most of them.

Then when you do meet someone you wish to meet in person and really get to know they are hesitant to meet you or to take a chance.

Life folks is a chance, we take chances everyday in out lives from waking up to going to sleep and all in between. Hesitation usually leads to losing out on the person you may really be interested is what I am referring to. People meet all the time in these chat rooms, from Bondage.com, to here, to Alt.com and Aff.com and other chat programs, but they wait long periods of time to speak up and say they want to meet someone and in the end they lose out.


You know I have never experienced this. Then again...when my ex Dom released me. He knew I would go to the net to search. It was available to me. We owned one of those 4 grand computers. Back when 14k was the big rage.
Anyway. His advice to me was. When in a chat room..sit silently. Watch everyone and how they talk. If you see someone using chat room lingo. Apparently they are far from reality. Don't talk to them or take them seriously. They have already spent too much time in fantasyland.
Talk to the person who talks like a human being.
It served me well. For the most part chat rooms are filled with fantasyland types. So I do more real life things instead. If I do meet someone online...and they express an interest in the lifestyle. I explain what a munch is. Then ask them if they would like to come.
It works for me.

(in reply to DomCT2002)
Profile   Post #: 2
meeting? - 3/9/2004 8:59:13 AM   
Perempt


Posts: 24
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: US
Status: offline
Most bdsm chatters never meet, and may be that's okay. the level f most chatroom exchange s small-talk, after all. In the case where you meet someone whom you want to know better, though, real time meeting is the only good way, IMHO...whether for a relationship or just a real friendship. I do understand why folks in this life are careful about rt meetings...they should be. I merely mention that I'd like to get together, if the other does, in a public space, bring a lifestyle friend if desired, whenever...and then I drop the matter. Sometimes it leads to a meeting, sometimes not; if not, intimacy is probably not important to the other.

_____________________________

[email protected]

(in reply to sub4hire)
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RE: meeting? - 3/9/2004 10:00:42 AM   
EStrict


Posts: 729
Joined: 1/11/2004
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Well, Sir, if I am not mistaken you have been on this you have only been here,,, well, looking back your first post was on 2/23 which was a mere 15 days ago. That's not really very long for anyone to have spoken to you and even decide if they actually WANT to meet. That's one of the biggest problems with online,, everyone seems to expect instant gratification.

I do know that some have suggested you try local RL functions as a way to meet. After all, then at least the people are local.

As far as what Gloria said, I think she explains the chat room well. When I type :::laughing::: in a post or in a room, odds are, I am. I am happy person and laugh out loud often at something I read, or a random thought someone has put in my head. When I am *watching* others in a room, I also tend to discount those that *play* in a non-play chat room (one that is supposedly for just conversation). By that, I mean whereas I may enjoy my online interaction with them, they are not someone I would have considered meeting RL. You know what I mean,,, those dominants that say 'come sit on my lap'. I am a very RL oriented person, and unless Master is in the room with me (both home and online) and I have the wireless keyboard that I can still be in both places when I type it, then I am not going to say it.

There is nothing wrong with online play if that's something you enjoy, it's just not my cup of tea. And since I look for those in RL situations (even if just RL friendships) who seem firmly in reality to me, that is a good reason to just observe and/or not rush to meet someone.

It has been mentioned in many different threads on meeting and finding others how important it is be both realistic and patient. Any dominant or submissive who is pushing RL after a just a few hours of talking (even if the hours are spread out over a week or two), *especially* if they are not local, is one that I also warn those I mentor to be careful of. Good and long term relationships take real life time, not the instant gratification of online time to build.

As usual, these are just my opinions. But you did ask :)

_____________________________

Sandy

Don't take life too seriously, no one gets out alive anyway...

(in reply to Perempt)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Ironically - Actually here is what I meant! - 3/9/2004 12:33:05 PM   
inyouagain


Posts: 418
Joined: 1/6/2004
Status: offline
quote:


...Hesitation usually leads to losing out on the person you may really be interested is what I am referring to. People meet all the time in these chat rooms, from Bondage.com, to here, to Alt.com and Aff.com and other chat programs, but they wait long periods of time to speak up and say they want to meet someone and in the end they lose out.


This really does not make sense, especially with a parallel thread in this same forum. You make yourself appear to be 'sympathetically seducing' CT subs who may feel sorry for your plight as the lonely CT Dom who has 'ALSO' sufferd the losses of missing so many who were hesitant and waited too long?

Your comments make it appear you are well aware of chat rooms, and of the players, fakes, wannabes, 'unsupervised or poorly supervised' government/corporate employees... wiling away the hours... playing on the clock, then home to their vanilla families, etc.

If you are fully aware of all these types lurking in online forums (chat rooms, etc), it woud seem hesitancy would be regarded as a virtue in your eyes, and you would hold a greater appreciation for more thorough screening, or taking the time necessary to ensure you are not being played, duped, etc, etc, etc

It seems that YOU are feeling URGENCY, moreso than those that you have not met (because they are hesitant in opening themselves up to you) are showing hesitancy.

Is this (and parallel threads) merely an attempt to line up prospects here on the message board that can 'relate' to your 'loss' and 'sense of urgency to prevent same'... and realize what a find you indeed are for them?

Are you actually fishing here for those who parallel your own interests, have experienced 'losses due to hesitation', and share your sense of urgent timing... on a message board... where the written text does not scroll away (ie. the hook is in the water longer here)?

Sorry, but that's the impression I'm getting from your message board activity. If you review ALL your posts, seperate them into 'looking for CT subs' and 'other board commentary', I think you will see where your impetus lies... It's becoming very easy to see to me, and likely most others here.

It's not likely any fish will jump out of the water here into your boat... no matter how you try to approach them... but it's becoming obvious that's your interest. Many have suggested you look for local contacts, and others have pointed out you don't even have a personal profile (or ad) here? That further makes no sense... an Urgent Shy Dom may not be what subs find appealing, so other action/plans are in order on your part.

SO, you can't find a CT sub here... ok, now what?
More ploys, twists, turns, and threads about your inabilities or untimely difficulties?
Do you want a sub who feels sorry for your lack of diversity?
A couple more threads may get you an imaginary (or goody, a real) sympathetic sub?

It would appear at this point, that your approach shot needs work.

Sorry but I call it like I see it, and that appears to be what your 3 seperate 'Seeking CT sub' threads (immediately if not sooner), and your 7 total posts have accomplished. I see no further interest here than seeking your CT sub, by hook, crook, or 'urgency'.

Perhaps you could start a new thread (4th thread, 8th post), saying you only have 'xx' number of days to live, and it's urgent you be rescued by a CT sub... yunno, let them have an ultimatim... then if you don't hook a CT sub here, then move on to happier fishing waters, or expand your fishing hole by including neighboring states?

This 'floater' is still being well beaten (with your boat paddle?), despite having long been a dead fish!

Note: We do have a 'sub' on this board who obviously has numerous personalities, acts male, but may in fact be female, but likes themself very very much... perhaps we can hook you up? We could tell this sub to 'be from CT', and I'm sure they will relate same to you... without 'hesitation'!

PS: Don't forget we bragged to other trolls about how you 'saw the light', and are now a contributing board member... not a troll. Were we in fact wrong? Should we have hesitated longer in rendering our decision about your true nature and purpose here?

Inyouagain

< Message edited by inyouagain -- 3/9/2004 12:41:04 PM >

(in reply to DomCT2002)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Actually here is what I meant! - 3/15/2004 7:32:43 AM   
dkitty


Posts: 6
Joined: 3/6/2004
From: Seattle, WA USA
Status: offline
quote:

If you see someone using chat room lingo. Apparently they are far from reality. Don't talk to them or take them seriously.


That's well and good, except for those of us who grew up on the net. Bits and pieces of netspeak have made their way into my everyday spoken vocabulary. I even have L33t listed on my resume under spoken languages. Seriously.

(in reply to sub4hire)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Actually here is what I meant! - 3/15/2004 6:49:13 PM   
seattleminx


Posts: 46
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: Seattle, WA
Status: offline
quote:

You come across very few in the lifestyle in your daily life and on these chat programs is where you really find most of them.

Then when you do meet someone you wish to meet in person and really get to know they are hesitant to meet you or to take a chance.

Life folks is a chance, we take chances everyday in out lives from waking up to going to sleep and all in between. Hesitation usually leads to losing out on the person you may really be interested is what I am referring to. People meet all the time in these chat rooms, from Bondage.com, to here, to Alt.com and Aff.com and other chat programs, but they wait long periods of time to speak up and say they want to meet someone and in the end they lose out.


I think this is all personal taste.. ahem.. personally. I myself very much prefer to meet people in Real life, after having been burned one time to many by people on the net. But this is simply my own experience and preference.

I recently served a wonderful domme who switches to an online Mistress. Add I promise you that her devotion to her Mistress was just as strong as my devotion towards her.

(in reply to DomCT2002)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Actually here is what I meant! - 3/16/2004 1:52:50 AM   
iwillserveu


Posts: 1633
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
dkitty,

If you don't mind an old fart asking, what is D33t?

Sandy,

He said chat, not message boards. (I know you are pointing at something and I'm talking about your finger.)

_____________________________

When the Lady smiles i can't resist her call. As a matter of fact, i don't resist at all. Well that depends if it is a smile or a grimmace.

(in reply to dkitty)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Actually here is what I meant! - 3/16/2004 4:15:26 AM   
inyouagain


Posts: 418
Joined: 1/6/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: iwillserveu

dkitty,

If you don't mind an old fart asking, what is D33t?


Nobody said 'D33t', but somebody did say 'L33t', and even gave a place to define it. From what I've seen you don't need to worry about 'L33t'... but may be 'D33t' after all?

quote:


Sandy,

He said chat, not message boards. (I know you are pointing at something and I'm talking about your finger.)


I simply cannot understand your attempt at correcting Sandy, half her post was regarding chat? Shall we turn off the lights since you don't seem to need them?

But at any rate, you've managed to increase your Post Count with even more drivel... as usual!

Will you ever stop being the you we've all been seeing... the other day you even started a whole new thread because you forgot where the first thread you started of same topic was?

Some of your screws are obviously loose, but many others seem to be missing entirely.

Inyouagain

(in reply to iwillserveu)
Profile   Post #: 9
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