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Are we all switches ? - 3/19/2009 1:09:47 PM

Posts: 97
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Pardon my ignorance, as it is all a learning experience with me.
Is being a switch only sexual or is it mental as well ?
I consider myself to be a straight submissive woman,
I enjoy kneeling to a dominant man.
If a man is weak and does not have the skills to keep me in my place,
( I can be most bratty at time and to speak my mind alot ) I tend to turn more dominant, mostly because I am a single mom and many responsibilities in this life.
I have a good nose for BS. and do not suffer fools kindly.
Does this make me a switch ?

Thank you for your time.

_____________________________

sincerely,
sabirah

The room is silent, absolutely silent, except for the decisive click of the collar lock.
It is a sound the girl will never forget.

RE: Are we all switches ? - 3/19/2009 1:45:58 PM

Posts: 11766
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this slave doesn't believe we are all switches, just like she doesn't believe we are all bisexual...but that's just perception from her own personal experiences.

the time this slave spent with the offspring---they dominated her life, not the other way around.

this slave doesn't need to be put in her place...she is very eager to behave in the manner that is spelled out to her as being perceived as pleasing.

it is next to impossible for her to discern BS from sincerity. she has been fooled ALOT.

can't speak to the "weak" dominant issue, but it has been this slave's experience that irresponsible dominants don't dominate much for very long...so she learned to not engage them in intimate relationships.

if you are comfortable with and enjoy both dominance and submission, sexual or otherwise, this slave would gather that you might be a switch...but she wouldn't go so far as to label you as such...that's up to you.

(in reply to sabirah)

RE: Are we all switches ? - 3/19/2009 2:53:22 PM

Posts: 33
Joined: 3/13/2009
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beth, you are awesome :)

I don't mind a bit of switch play, to an extent. But i become afraid it might diminish the Doms authority in my eyes. I was a professional Domme for about a year once, and it was fun, and god it lets you vent, but it was not a sexual thing for me either. For me being Domme is about the control and the fun of the pain. I surprised myself to learn i was a pretty harsh Domme lol. Sexually i prefer the submission, and i do love to play as a sub. But there are times when i crave the power.

_____________________________

Chelsea Kya

"It is better to be hated for what you are, than to be loved for what you are not"

"Pay no mind to those who speak behind your back, it simply means you are two steps ahead"

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

RE: Are we all switches ? - 3/19/2009 4:18:45 PM

Posts: 196
Joined: 3/6/2009
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impo i think pretty much everyone is a switch, i also think everyone is bisexual. some people just have alot more disire for one over the other in the gender/orintation thing. i mean everyone can reconise the people around them that are strong sexual compatition for the people they desire, sure it may just end there or some people like myself find people from all spectrums hot. iv competed with woman and men for both woman and men. there are very few 100% doms/subs/gays/straights in the world in my view.

(in reply to ChelseaNY)

RE: Are we all switches ? - 3/19/2009 10:55:31 PM

Posts: 126
Joined: 5/31/2008
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answer to post...are we all switches..absolutely not....but we are all different..what a wonderful world!
ree!

(in reply to sabirah)

RE: Are we all switches ? - 3/21/2009 9:01:05 AM

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

Do you want to be in a relationship with a submissive man? That to me is the important question. Do you feel a drive to top or control one?

Because taking control in a vanilla situation is totally different.

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Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to marysdream)

RE: Are we all switches ? - 3/21/2009 4:52:45 PM

Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
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Domineering in your everyday life or when your dominant just can't get it right is not the same as being or feeling Dominant. Its a world apart in my opinion.

I certainly don't believe everyone is a switch. I do however believe that a lot of Dominant people (not all) would secretly like to try the other side and this thought has come about from a large amount of dominant men asking me to dominate them privately.

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S&M (Steve and Maria) persona libre de convencionalismos

Fan of edgeplay.co.uk

(in reply to DesFIP)

RE: Are we all switches ? - 3/21/2009 5:04:45 PM

Voluptuoushussy

Posts: 4
Joined: 3/12/2009
Status: offline

As someone that is dealing with this very question...I think each person defines their own version of switching. I think everyone has a part of each of it in them..I learned that I wanted to explore my sub side from a very good friend that was a good Dom and friend and who let me experience a few sessions with him...it was the opening I needed to go in search of someone to help me explore the sub side...but part of me, enjoys the control and fufillment that topping someone can bring...

I suppose some would call me a switch now, because of liking both things, just at this moment I am seeking to explore the sub side...at some point I hope to find a happy balance.

(in reply to allthatjaz)

RE: Are we all switches ? - 3/22/2009 6:39:17 AM

Posts: 178
Joined: 3/4/2009
Status: offline

We are all part of this lifestyle. Sometimes we may have the opportunity to learn new things. That is what makes it open and free. You are free to be you.

Best Wishes,

MJ

(in reply to sabirah)

RE: Are we all switches ? - 3/22/2009 12:42:31 PM

Posts: 1829
Joined: 7/25/2005
From: Phx AZ
Status: offline

Noooooo we are all not all Switches , No way are we all " use humans " all "Bi" either .

(in reply to MissJanice2)

RE: Are we all switches ? - 3/24/2009 12:47:28 AM

submissivexheart

Posts: 13
Joined: 1/8/2009
Status: offline

To answer this question, no W/we are not all switches. To truly know if O/one is sub / slave Master or Mistress is to know ones self on the inside. For if O/one does not know such then what Y/you think Y/you know... Y/you may not know

(in reply to azropedntied)

RE: Are we all switches ? - 3/24/2009 5:41:57 PM

Posts: 152
Joined: 12/22/2008
Status: offline

Are we all switches? I personally don't think so.

I feel there are some that are 100% dominant, 100% submissive and 100% switch. That leaves loads of room to play with in between the extremes. Where each fits in depends upon the individual.

I was blessed to witness and be a part of a plethora of lifestyle choices at the IMsL conference and feel very empowered by the experience. I came face to face with an energy in myself I had been frightened of and one of the woman I was paired with in a workshop felt it. I have yet to label it, but it sure is fun to experience and feel.

Good luck in your journey!

TT

_____________________________

“Listen, I am trying to cope with the presence of God and the Universal Human Experience, and I haven’t even had a cup of tea yet!” -French and Saunders

(in reply to submissivexheart)

RE: Are we all switches ? - 3/27/2009 7:57:16 AM

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Joined: 7/26/2007
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No, I can assure you we are not all switches. It may be that for those for whom wiitwd is less mental, more physical, switching is possible or easier. I don't know that. However, for some of us it is mental first and for me that makes it impossible to switch. Couldn't do it, nor would I ever want to see one to whom I was submissive in a submissive role. It would mess me up.

< Message edited by subtee -- 3/27/2009 7:58:41 AM >

_____________________________

Don't believe everything you think...

(in reply to sabirah)

RE: Are we all switches ? - 4/1/2009 3:08:14 PM

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Joined: 3/16/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Vanityfull

impo i think pretty much everyone is a switch, i also think everyone is bisexual. some people just have alot more disire for one over the other in the gender/orintation thing. i mean everyone can reconise the people around them that are strong sexual compatition for the people they desire, sure it may just end there or some people like myself find people from all spectrums hot. iv competed with woman and men for both woman and men. there are very few 100% doms/subs/gays/straights in the world in my view.

Then either your view is misguided (which is what I believe) or I'm just so special. I am gay. Period. I'm femme, there has always been men around me but I have no sexual interest in them. Some of my closest buddies have often been men but I am not bi at all...so all of us are not bi.

(in reply to Vanityfull)

RE: Are we all switches ? - 4/2/2009 7:51:34 AM

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Joined: 3/2/2009
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My personal opinion: no not all are switches. I know I am a switch who likes the top but at times I need/want to explore the bottom to be a better top..... right now in my journey I am doing that but I know in my heart I am a switch....... I think switches evolve because they are getting to know themselves. It's like we are stuck in the middle of an oreo cookie and not sure which side we want to eat/lick (lol) at least that is what i am experiencing right now.

. If anyone would like to explain this phenomeman to me I would love to hear about it. Cause right now I am just letting that oreo cookie sit there .....................

< Message edited by darkstarjan -- 4/2/2009 7:53:15 AM >

(in reply to LAgirlsub)

RE: Are we all switches ? - 4/2/2009 9:35:53 AM

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Joined: 3/24/2009
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I'm not a switch. My mind can't even wrap around the concept of being submissive to anyone. I understand well the mind of the submissive but the thought of me being submissive is so alien, so foreign to me, so incomprehensible that it's like speaking in another language. I've often been intrigued by switches and I've had many offers from Doms who claim that they would switch for me. I respect switches, no more so than subs or Doms, but as to everyone being a switch, I would say no. I've met many a sub who isn't capable of being Dom to anyone or anything.

(in reply to sabirah)

RE: Are we all switches ? - 4/2/2009 10:32:20 AM

Posts: 135
Joined: 3/28/2009
From: Germany
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AfroerotiK

I'm not a switch. My mind can't even wrap around the concept of being submissive to anyone.

It's the same for me with being dominant to anyone, I just couldn't imagine it.
I mean, sure, I can plan stuff, tell people what to do in groups and so on, but in a relationship, I couldn't imagine it.... it would be scary and so not like me I guess.

(in reply to AfroerotiK)

RE: Are we all switches ? - 4/2/2009 10:45:20 AM

Posts: 544
Joined: 5/11/2008
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I have tried to switch for friends who wanted play, but couldnt find anyone... I found the happiness and pleasure I derived from it was making the other person happy.
I have an attraction to women, the same as i do for a playful puppy, but that does not make me bi nor into beastiality.

(in reply to sabirah)

RE: Are we all switches ? - 4/2/2009 9:00:15 PM

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Joined: 4/1/2009
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My thoughts are we individually define what makes us a switch and what doesn't plus the fact that we who do identify as a switch according to our own definitions. With the cub and myself, he identifies as a switch with dominant tenancies which means he takes control more often where as I prefer to submit to him. I will switch though more in the realm of sensual play, hence I refer myself as a submissive switch.

_____________________________

Like a dagger you stick me in the heart and taste the blood from my blade
And when we sleep would you shelter me in your warm and dark embrace

Did you eat a bowl of stupid for breakfast?

The Chosen Bear & RESIDENT MANWHORE

(in reply to sabirah)

RE: Are we all switches ? - 4/2/2009 10:13:36 PM

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Joined: 3/6/2009
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"impo i think pretty much everyone is a switch, i also think everyone is bisexual...."

"Then either your view is misguided (which is what I believe) or I'm just so special. I am gay. Period. I'm femme, there has always been men around me but I have no sexual interest in them. Some of my closest buddies have often been men but I am not bi at all...so all of us are not bi."

sorry i meant to put MOST everyone is bi, i firmly support any sexual orination someone picks be it gay straight or w/e and its a deeply personal thing and i am the last person to arguee how queer or straight someone is. i know quiet a few boys and girls without a gay or straight bone in them.

Edit: i hate the quoting system on this site so confusing..

< Message edited by Vanityfull -- 4/2/2009 10:15:53 PM >

_____________________________

"give away everything, so others have nothing"

(in reply to LAgirlsub)

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