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Competition and D/s relations - 4/2/2009 9:42:15 AM

WiseCracknSadist

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How do you handle competative situations in which your sub or slave beats you?

I'm sure we're all adults here and act accordingly, but have you ever heard of a sub or slave being punished for beating a Dom or Master?

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RE: Competition and D/s relations - 4/2/2009 9:43:52 AM

hopeful68

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Beats you... ??? at what.. cards.. monopoly.. ?? or with a belt.. ? lol

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RE: Competition and D/s relations - 4/2/2009 10:28:06 AM

sublace

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It is my own bias and a stereotype ( luckily my experience) I find Doms are typically more secure in their masculinity, competence and and yep- dominance ( my bias here ).

So, he mostly wins! If I win and beat Him - he is super proud of his fierce little girl!!!

a win/win situation

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RE: Competition and D/s relations - 4/2/2009 10:31:13 AM

AquaticSub

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quote:

ORIGINAL: WiseCracknSadist

How do you handle competative situations in which your sub or slave beats you?

I'm sure we're all adults here and act accordingly, but have you ever heard of a sub or slave being punished for beating a Dom or Master?

I haven't heard of it though given humans I wouldn't be all that surprised if I did hear of it. However, Valyraen doesn't punish me when I win at a game or other competition. He's proud of me and usually brags about what a good girl he has.

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RE: Competition and D/s relations - 4/2/2009 10:35:39 AM

DesFIP

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If he did, I wouldn't play games with him again. It isn't always competitiveness, sometimes it just is the draw of the cards or the roll of the dice.

Someone so insecure who still said "let's play scrabble" and then was a sore loser is not someone I could have much respect for.

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RE: Competition and D/s relations - 4/2/2009 1:31:53 PM

kidwithknife

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It might sound petty, but letting me win at boardgames is a dealbreaker for me. (And I prefer the backstabbing games like Junta and Illuminati, so I fully expect a sub to merrily betray me along with everyone else).

Firstly, I like boardgames a lot. And I actively want a sub who I can play them with. And having no real challenge ruins that for me.

Secondly, I don't want to be embarassed in front of my gamer friends.

Finally, I'm not five years old.

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RE: Competition and D/s relations - 4/2/2009 1:57:10 PM

eleusis

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Not in a D/s relationship at the moment- but, when I was, there was an understanding that I was to be honest and do my best in any given situation. That would include game playing. So, if I threw a game to let Him win, I would not exactly be being true to myself, or to Him. And if skill, or luck, decided in my favor- there is no way I'd have been punished for it (except maybe playfully, with a swat on the rump and a playful jab at my good fortune). I would not have much respect for anyone that was a sore loser and then took it out on me.

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RE: Competition and D/s relations - 4/2/2009 2:34:30 PM

LovingDom86

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quote:

ORIGINAL: eleusis

Not in a D/s relationship at the moment- but, when I was, there was an understanding that I was to be honest and do my best in any given situation. That would include game playing. So, if I threw a game to let Him win, I would not exactly be being true to myself, or to Him. And if skill, or luck, decided in my favor- there is no way I'd have been punished for it (except maybe playfully, with a swat on the rump and a playful jab at my good fortune). I would not have much respect for anyone that was a sore loser and then took it out on me.

Agreed, and I think that's how any mature relationship should be.

Only in good fun, where both parties know there is nothing real or fundamental at stake is there room for what can be very fun play of winning/losing. i.e. if a sub was "in power" in some board game for an example, and gets a roll of the die where s/he can either move one of their markers ahead or use it to move one of theirs on top of yours and send you back home (thinking of sorry, here:P ) then I would find it incredibly fun and even arousing to KNOW that they are loving the temporary "dominance" of the situation if you will. She would probably blush like absolutely mad and not be able to control her smiling, and I would likely give her the "Oh, so you think you're in charge now?" look with a big smirk. Spanking would, of course, ensue:P

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RE: Competition and D/s relations - 4/2/2009 3:22:47 PM

Lashra

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Sometimes I win, sometimes he does. I don't get upset about it and he does not gloat. We are just happy to spend time together and isn't that what its all about? At least for us it is.

~Lashra

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RE: Competition and D/s relations - 4/2/2009 3:45:42 PM

IronBear

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In any form of completive games or sport, whilst I may expect a slave on my team to see me as their natural leader, I set aside the shackles for the duration so we can play as equals and on our own merits. if they are better I will allow them to lead. On one to one competitions, the best human or hand wins as far as I'm concerned. If cards all they need to know is that I will not stack the deck or deal from anywhere than the top card. This is the fun area and I can't have fun if people are deferring to me..

< Message edited by IronBear -- 4/2/2009 3:46:10 PM >

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RE: Competition and D/s relations - 4/2/2009 3:51:25 PM

HeavansKeeper

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While I know My Pet tries her hardest when playing games with me, I get the feeling she may hold punches to help increase my likelihood of victory. It's just a feeling I get - I'll have to verify it with a few rounds of Candyland.
ETA: In this house, games are played for fun, and its no fun when losing turns to vengeance.

< Message edited by HeavansKeeper -- 4/2/2009 3:52:15 PM >

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RE: Competition and D/s relations - 4/2/2009 4:56:45 PM

DavanKael

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How do you handle competative situations in which your sub or slave beats you?
**Hopefully one who is worthy of dominion handles such a thing with grace and good cheer. They're games, afterall and a sad thing, indeed, if an ego is so fragile it can not take being beaten at a game or in another competative situation.
I'm sure we're all adults here and act accordingly, but have you ever heard of a sub or slave being punished for beating a Dom or Master?
**Oh, probably but nothing comes readily to mind. Someone who did such a thing would be quite the asshat and likely a petty abuser, imo.
Davan
(Who is wildly competative and would not dishonor herself or her other by doing any less than her best)

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RE: Competition and D/s relations - 4/2/2009 8:09:25 PM

RumpusParable

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quote:

ORIGINAL: WiseCracknSadist

How do you handle competative situations in which your sub or slave beats you?

I'm sure we're all adults here and act accordingly, but have you ever heard of a sub or slave being punished for beating a Dom or Master?

In real-life? Never in any amount of seriousness... sometimes in a "I'll fix you!" sort of playful way, yes.

Sometimes I can be playful like that, even if mock-serious. Most times I just laugh and congratulate them somehow.

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RE: Competition and D/s relations - 4/2/2009 9:54:09 PM

loveandlight87

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LovingDom86

Only in good fun, where both parties know there is nothing real or fundamental at stake is there room for what can be very fun play of winning/losing. i.e. if a sub was "in power" in some board game for an example, and gets a roll of the die where s/he can either move one of their markers ahead or use it to move one of theirs on top of yours and send you back home (thinking of sorry, here:P ) then I would find it incredibly fun and even arousing to KNOW that they are loving the temporary "dominance" of the situation if you will. She would probably blush like absolutely mad and not be able to control her smiling, and I would likely give her the "Oh, so you think you're in charge now?" look with a big smirk. Spanking would, of course, ensue:P

You could be describing Sir and me. He gets a kick out of my little toppy moments and thinks my 'baby d' is quite adorable (mostly ineffective, but highly amusing for him). And yes, I blush like mad too when I realize what I'm doing.

Sore losers, whether on the top or bottom, are very unattractive in my book and the ability to lose gracefully and in fun, very attractive.

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RE: Competition and D/s relations - 4/3/2009 2:32:59 AM

HeavansKeeper

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Re-reading my previous post, it seems I expressed myself poorly.

When I said "I get the feeling..." I meant "I wonder if...?" In any case, it's cute. DavanKael made me realize that those are not the same.

Do any submissives try to ensure their dominant's victory, just for the smiles?

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RE: Competition and D/s relations - 4/3/2009 4:42:33 AM

greeneyedreamer

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Realizing here that I don't want any dominant man (and I use the term "loosely" here for this post) who is so insecure that he can't handle a submissive woman "beathing" him at something. I mean WTF, you have to dumb down or not be as good just to build his ego. If his ego isn't strong enough to handle it? Oh My!!! Be gone Loser!!!

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RE: Competition and D/s relations - 4/3/2009 4:47:38 AM

eyesopened

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My Master knows the difference between the object of a game and the goal of shared activities.

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RE: Competition and D/s relations - 4/3/2009 7:32:02 AM

OsideGirl

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Well ,lte's put it this way.....when we play poker tournaments he likes to sit a different table than I am. :o)

The only time he's ever gotten even mildy upset is when I bluffed him on a pair of two's and got him to fold a pair of Aces. And at the point he was piqued because he couldn't tell I was lying to him. I think it shattered that thought that he could always see right through me.

Typically he brags about my playing and always insists that the guys invite me along when they're playing.

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RE: Competition and D/s relations - 4/3/2009 11:25:12 AM

Kana

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Let's start with this:
She would never want to find out what happened if I discovered she threw the game.
It would be a bad mistake on her part.
All I want from her is her very best, in this as in all else. How could I not be happy if she betters me in something?

It has zip to do with my dominance.
that comes from who I am (and who she is~winks)
Not what I do.
If it threatened my domination with her, I would need to take a long hard look at my ego.

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RE: Competition and D/s relations - 4/3/2009 12:15:04 PM

greeneyedreamer

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quote:

Let's start with this:
She would never want to find out what happened if I discovered she threw the game.
It would be a bad mistake on her part.
All I want from her is her very best, in this as in all else. How could I not be happy if she betters me in something?

It has zip to do with my dominance.
that comes from who I am (and who she is~winks)
Not what I do.
If it threatened my domination with her, I would need to take a long hard look at my ego.

(in reply to OsideGirl)

That's what I mean by strength! Great to hear. My dom is the same way. Whoo hoo for strength!!!!!

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I am still learning... Michelangelo, age 87

Maybe some women weren't meant to be tamed. Maybe they are suppose to run wild until they find someone just as wild to run with. Sex and the City

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