Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate"

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Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate" - 5/13/2009 12:57:24 PM

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To avoid derailing another thread here any further I present to our readers the oft-quoted and referenced Gloria Steinem satire, "If Men Could Menstruate". Some of the cultural references are obviously from the 1970's. An excerpt is below, click on the link at the bottom for the full piece.

"If Men Could Menstruate"

"What would happen, for instance, if suddenly, magically, men could menstruate and women could not?

The answer is clear- menstruation would become an enviable, boast-worthy, masculine event:

Boys would mark the onset of menses, that longed for proof of manhood, with religious ritual and stag parties.

Congress would fund a National Institute of Dysmenorrhea to help stamp out monthly discomforts.

Sanitary supplies would be federally funded and free. (Of course, some men would still pay for the prestige of commercial brands such as John Wayne Tampons, Muhammad Ali's Rope-a-dope Pads, Joe Namath Jock Shields- "For Those Light Bachlor Days," and Robert "Baretta" Blake Maxi-Pads.)

Military men, right wing politicians, and religious fundamentalists would cite menstruation ("men-struation") as proof that only men could serve in the Army ("you have to give blood to take blood"), occupy political office ("can women be aggressive without that steadfast cycle governed by the planet Mars?"), be priests or ministers ("how could a woman give her blood for our sins?"), or rabbis ("without the monthly loss of impurities, women remain unclean").

Male radicals, left wing politicians, mystics, however, would insist that women are equal, just different, and that any woman could enter their ranks if only she were willing to self-inflict a major wound every month ("you must give blood for the revolution"), recognize the preeminence of menstrual issues, or subordinate her selfness to all men in their Cycle of Enlightenment.

Street guys would brag ("I'm a three pad man") or answer praise from a buddy ("Man, you lookin' good!") by giving fives and saying, "Yeah, man, I'm on the rag!" "

http://www.feministezine.com/feminist/funny/If-Men-Could-Menstruate.html

_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE

http://KinkMeet.co.uk

RE: Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate" - 5/13/2009 1:08:17 PM

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Was it also Steinem who said "If men could get pregnant, abortion would not just be legal, it would be a sacrament"?
j

(in reply to Vendaval)

RE: Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate" - 5/13/2009 1:13:08 PM

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Ahhhh, the joy that could come from an “A” sexual reality; “ribbit”.

Since snuggling is simply overrated and its absence a fair trade-off to eliminate nagging and shoe closet construction cost. I’m all for a few cramps.

If we could menstruate, we would therefore ovulate... no longer having to tolerate those bringing forth the pitiful debates concerning fairness and equality.

Adios to the feminist contingent.

Snorts and roots around with his old chauvinistic proboscis.

< Message edited by xBullx -- 5/13/2009 1:16:44 PM >

_____________________________

Live well,

Bull

I'm not an asshole; I'm simply resolute...

"A Republic, If You Can Keep It."

Caution: My humor is a bit skewed.

(in reply to Vendaval)

RE: Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate" - 5/13/2009 1:18:25 PM

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Yes, that was Ms. Steinem.

_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE

http://KinkMeet.co.uk

(in reply to janiebelle)

RE: Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate" - 5/13/2009 1:19:27 PM

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If men could menstruate and women couldnt then all we would have done is switch names for the genders and nothing else would change. She was never that bright.

(in reply to xBullx)

RE: Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate" - 5/13/2009 1:37:52 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: xBullx

Ahhhh, the joy that could come from an “A” sexual reality; “ribbit”.

Since snuggling is simply overrated and its absence a fair trade-off to eliminate nagging and shoe closet construction cost. I’m all for a few cramps.

If we could menstruate, we would therefore ovulate... no longer having to tolerate those bringing forth the pitiful debates concerning fairness and equality.

Adios to the feminist contingent.

Snorts and roots around with his old chauvinistic proboscis.

Busting out laughing...but hey, how come *I* don't have a shoe closet???
Thank you for providing the subject for my next great nag-fest.
j

(in reply to xBullx)

RE: Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate" - 5/13/2009 2:20:17 PM

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You missed the point entirely.

_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE

http://KinkMeet.co.uk

(in reply to CruelNUnsual)

RE: Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate" - 5/13/2009 2:31:52 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Vendaval

You missed the point entirely.

......impossible.

(in reply to Vendaval)

RE: Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate" - 5/13/2009 2:41:17 PM

cpK69

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~fr~

Can you imagine the fist fights, as they battled over who could be king of chocolate?

I never understood how Eve got blamed for “making” Adam eat the forbidden fruit, doesn’t really make him ‘The Man’; does it?

Kim

_____________________________

Humility is where weakness and strength meet and humanity begins.

one voice

(in reply to Vendaval)

RE: Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate" - 5/13/2009 3:03:22 PM

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Mis-post.

< Message edited by ElWray -- 5/13/2009 3:04:07 PM >

(in reply to cpK69)

RE: Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate" - 5/13/2009 3:05:02 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: cpK69
I never understood how Eve got blamed for “making” Adam eat the forbidden fruit, doesn’t really make him ‘The Man’; does it?

The simplest explanation is that throughout recorded history, men have done stupid things for a piece of ass. Were I Adam, I'd have simply said "Ohhhh you ate the apple? That sucks. I'll send you a postcard. Let me know what it's like outside the garden, hmmm?"

(in reply to cpK69)

RE: Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate" - 5/13/2009 3:10:37 PM

cpK69

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Loki45
The simplest explanation is that throughout recorded history, men have done stupid things for a piece of ass. Were I Adam, I'd have simply said "Ohhhh you ate the apple? That sucks. I'll send you a postcard. Let me know what it's like outside the garden, hmmm?"

…. or, the story has been twisted.

Seems to me, before they ate, they were both blissfully ignorant. Eating gave them the ability to learn.

It makes no sense to me, to ‘blame the bitch’, unless Adam’s aspirations were to remain ignorant.

Kim

< Message edited by cpK69 -- 5/13/2009 3:11:59 PM >

_____________________________

Humility is where weakness and strength meet and humanity begins.

one voice

(in reply to Loki45)

RE: Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate" - 5/13/2009 3:14:36 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: cpK69
…. or, the story has been twisted.

Seems to me, before they ate, they were both blissfully ignorant. Eating gave them the ability to learn.

It makes no sense to me, to ‘blame the bitch’, unless Adam’s aspirations were to remain ignorant.

Twisting the story to make your point doesn't prove that it was twisted to begin with. As the story goes, they were told NOT to eat the apple and she disobeyed. In order to stay with her, Adam ate the apple as well. They could both have remained in paradise had she not allowed herself to be seduced by the serpent (which sounds to me like nothing more than mild peer pressure honestly....a type of pressure I never had any trouble overcoming.)

(in reply to cpK69)

RE: Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate" - 5/13/2009 3:15:11 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: cpK69

It makes no sense to me, to ‘blame the bitch’, unless Adam’s aspirations were to remain ignorant.

It starts making sense if you remember that this original "Shift the Blame" story was written by blokes.

_____________________________

(in reply to cpK69)

RE: Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate" - 5/13/2009 3:40:01 PM

cpK69

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Loki45
Twisting the story to make your point doesn't prove that it was twisted to begin with. As the story goes, they were told NOT to eat the apple and she disobeyed. In order to stay with her, Adam ate the apple as well. They could both have remained in paradise had she not allowed herself to be seduced by the serpent (which sounds to me like nothing more than mild peer pressure honestly....a type of pressure I never had any trouble overcoming.)

Lol… I offered a suggestion based on the widely accepted concepts of ‘Man’; which imply, either Adam wasn’t ‘The Man’, or, Eve wasn’t the bitch someone has made her out to be.

Then again, I have also considered, the one known most widely as Adam's wife, Eve, is the enbodyment of law, and that is what makes her such an issue; but so many seem to like law. So another thought was, man is confused as to which of Adam's three wives, he is actually 'unhappy' with.

Do you honestly believe it hasn’t been changed in the hands of man?

Kim

_____________________________

Humility is where weakness and strength meet and humanity begins.

one voice

(in reply to Loki45)

RE: Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate" - 5/13/2009 3:46:29 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: cpK69
Lol… I offered a suggestion based on the widely accepted concepts of ‘Man’; which imply, either Adam wasn’t ‘The Man’, or, Eve wasn’t the bitch someone has made her out to be.

Then again, I have also considered, the one known most widely as Adam's wife, Eve, is the enbodyment of law, and that is what makes her such an issue; but so many seem to like law. So another thought was, man is confused as to which of Adam's three wives, he is actually 'unhappy' with.

Do you honestly believe it hasn’t been changed in the hands of man?

Actually, what I 'honestly believe' is that the book is more of a metaphor than anything and has, on numerous occasions, contradicted itself so many ways it's almost unuseable. Such is the case with anything written by humans. That is why I do not subscribe to organized religion, especially when they often preach one thing and do another.

However, since your original comment was made from the assumption that Adam and Eve was a historical, fact-based account, I responded under the same caveat.

The caveat, of course, being that we can only take it as it appears. That is, unless you have some smoking gun proof that it was changed by those 'nefarious' men.

What never ceases to amuse me is how when a woman is bashing man, abusing a man, or attempting to over-generalize men, it's taken as comedy, satire, or a kudos that she's 'getting one back for her oppressed sisters.' Yet when a man does any of those same things, it's soooooo wrong and evil.

But such is the case from those who cry out for equality while secretly wanting nothing of the kind.

(in reply to cpK69)

RE: Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate" - 5/13/2009 3:50:13 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Loki45

But such is the case from those who cry out for equality while secretly wanting nothing of the kind.

My heart bleeds for you.

_____________________________

(in reply to Loki45)

RE: Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate" - 5/13/2009 3:51:02 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: cpK69

~fr~

Can you imagine the fist fights, as they battled over who could be king of chocolate?
Kim

Global Thermonuclear War.
No doubt.
And what if the Pamrin aisle was empty- mass rioting.

(in reply to cpK69)

RE: Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate" - 5/13/2009 4:32:47 PM

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I wouldn't mind that so much, but when they start devoting entire cable sports channels to "Mensturation contests"... I think I'd probably flip around to see what was on WE.

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RE: Gloria Steinem, "If Men Could Menstruate" - 5/13/2009 4:39:36 PM

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Hmmmmm, Menstruation.....Raging hormonal fluxes...transient emotional and psychological instability. Now you see a prime reason why women aren't made captains of SSBN'S.

(in reply to MarsBonfire)

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