RE: Repressed Memory (Full Version)

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Kalista07 -> RE: Repressed Memory (6/13/2009 7:50:08 PM)

Edited because it has become abundantly clear to me that this is not a topic people want to actually learn about.....but instead want to ponitificate about.

Nihilus, for the record...Most therapy sessions conducted within the last 15 or so years do not have any kind of medication component to them. This is to say that the sedation issue you refer to (while it may have some historical basis) is not completely relevant or is it legal or ethical in clinical practice today.

Kali




Ialdabaoth -> RE: Repressed Memory (6/13/2009 7:54:07 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Kalista07

quote:

People's feelings should always be honored, but people's beliefs should not. Not one of us knows what reality truly is. Not a goddamn one of us can stand up and say, "X happened!". The best we have is ideas, and consensus, and factual evidence. Of which memory is an incredibly flimsy example.


HOT DAMNED!!!!!  i seriously wish someone would have told me this sooner.... i mean seriously...i know that i had my thyroid removed...But, now that You tell me i can't 'really' remember it...or more specifically my memory of it shouldn't be validated..Well, than i'll bet these doctors will have no problem rescinding their medical bills....

Do You see the problem in Your thinking here?? At all???
Kali



I'm having trouble correlating these two ideas at all, to be honest. You have doctors demanding money from you. Their demands are backed by a legal and financial system that can enforce various unpleasant consequences upon you if you don't pay. I don't see how your memory has anything to do with that.




Kalista07 -> RE: Repressed Memory (6/13/2009 7:57:15 PM)

quote:

Not one of us knows what reality truly is. Not a goddamn one of us can stand up and say, "X happened!". The best we have is ideas, and consensus, and factual evidence. Of which memory is an incredibly flimsy example.



i quoted the above again because the broad statement You made is not an effective one. You stated that "Not a goddamn one of us can stand up and say 'X happened!' " You stated our memory is an incredibly flimsy example. The correlation i'm trying to make for You is that i have this memory and Your telling me not only should i not, but society as a whole should not trust my memory....If it applies to one area why not to every area?
Kali




Ialdabaoth -> RE: Repressed Memory (6/13/2009 8:00:39 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Kalista07

i quoted the above again because the broad statement You made is not an effective one. You stated that "Not a goddamn one of us can stand up and say 'X happened!' " You stated our memory is an incredibly flimsy example. The correlation i'm trying to make for You is that i have this memory and Your telling me not only should i not, but society as a whole should not trust my memory....If it applies to one area why not to every area?
Kali



No! That's exactly what I'm saying! It does apply to every area.

Sure, sometimes memory is all we have to go on, but that doesn't mean we should rely on it. When all we have is memory, we have to proceed very cautiously. When we have physical evidence that can be interpreted in multiple ways, we have to be very careful letting our memories influence which of those interpretations we decide to go with.

People want to have this nice, neat, cut-and-dry world. And it doesn't work like that. We can't be sure of anything. Hell, I can't be sure that I'm actually awake right now. But we do the best we can, with the level of ambiguity we have. It's not the end of the world to not be sure.




Kalista07 -> RE: Repressed Memory (6/13/2009 8:09:15 PM)

i swear i'm not being deliberately obtuse, but i really don't understand what You mean. Maybe i'm just too stupid, and i am really okay with that. But there are very few "truths" in my life...but the ones that are there i am 100% convinced of their validity....
Kali




NihilusZero -> RE: Repressed Memory (6/13/2009 8:09:24 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Ialdabaoth

Either way, imagine the sheer amount of intensity that Kalista07 feels, here. If you don't work within that framework, you're going to create a level of emotional dissonance and turmoil that leaves Kalista07 no choice but to react hostilely to you. Yes, false memory syndrome is dangerous, and yes, people can cause a massive amount of damage with it. But that doesn't mean they're bad people, any more than them remembering something horrible happening means the people in those memories are bad people. We have to approach both sides with every ounce of compassion we can muster.

I do agree this is a very important point for me to be more focused on. This should at least let me rephrase my commentary in a way that doesn't come across as adversarial (which was not my intention).

I tried to initiate my comments by presuming her account of her memories is genuine. I obviously have no leg to stand on to be able to argue with personal experiences. Nor do I personally feel anything negative towards Kalista as a human being. I should probably take time to verbally make my understanding public that the events which precipitated a recollection of a traumatic memory are certainly something no one ever wants to go through. I have no intention of making it seem that I'm accusing anyone who's experienced these events of being responsible for them.

It's precisely because of the emotional volatility of these memories (where are all the repressed happy memories, dammit!) that the process is disconcerting.

As a final note, I'd like to say that I would personally admire the courage of those who have had such instances of memories come up, who have taken the steps to verify the accounts and who have confronted those demons directly and escaped not needing a straight jacket for the rest of their lives. Also, I would suggest that anyone who is worried that they may have discovered a very negative and hurtful past memory take a little time to read some of the stories of families who have been torn apart by false memories so that we don't enable the very type of thing we're trying to combat.






Kalista07 -> RE: Repressed Memory (6/13/2009 8:32:14 PM)

Nihilus,
i just wanted to thank You for the last post You just made. i also wanted to clarify some things.. i am (as i've previously stated) not someone who takes things as fact simply because someone else tells me it's true. In fact, one of the things i did as these 'memories', flashbacks, whatever we want to call them is i studied the False Memory Syndrome Society...i studied it at great length. There were many things that lead me to believe that my memories were at least valid ( i will not ever say there were necessarily 100% accurate) those included: neighbor reports, reports and beliefs of school teachers, physical issues, and then there were the 'mysterious' issues my sister struggled with.
i have great difficulty when people lump things into a great big generalized ball of crap. i shared my personal experience on this topic (rather than just my professional experience) in the hope that it might help someone else. Had i only had my own memories to deal with i would have chosen to discount them a long time ago.... And believe me when i say, that is something i used to struggle with greatly... But, my truth is....for me....it happened...i chose to confront those demons for what they were and since i have done that i'm a better person today because of it. That doesn't mean there were not just down right ugly, scarey, horrible times as well.
Kali




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