RE: The voices in my head. (Full Version)

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Arpig -> RE: The voices in my head. (6/15/2009 9:43:30 PM)

Thanks Panda. But really there's not all that much good or brave about it (OK, I admit it was fucking scary making that 1st post). I find it very helpful to unburden myself from this. It is a liberating feeling to tel, which is why I sometimes ramble on about various details without being asked.

Here's an example of some unsolicited stuff...Samas.

OK, the Spirits have a hierarchy, they have a leader, who is called The Destroyer. He (or she) gets this title, because when they assume the leadership, they take on the portfolio of the spirit of destruction. The Destroyer can be replaced by any member of the family, but only if he is murdered by the prospective new Destroyer. When the present Destroyer, is killed, he becomes Death. Death is the ruler over a huge series of caverns in which dwell the souls of all dead people. They have no bodies, no conciousness, they simply exist aimlessly in this place. There is no difference in the afterlife based on how good or bad a person is. Death is also responsible for collecting the souls of all those who die. When a new Destroyer takes over, the newly deceased Destroyer becomes Death, and Death is reborn as a Spirit. Samas is the current Death. Now you can see why I didn't want to get into it before...and I knew you really wanted more info Panda[:)]



Arpig -> RE: The voices in my head. (6/15/2009 9:47:58 PM)

quote:

silly question indeed, how do you explain WAFFLES to them?
LOL, Oddly enough, the topic just never came up. I mentioned earlier that I could allow the voices to take over control of my body, and in that case they could walk around and interact with our world, experiencing things through my body. Unfortunatly, I have no memory of what goes on while one of them is in charge, so can't tell you in any great detail about what transpired, but I do know they all loved chocolate, especially the girls (Day and Night).




suhlut -> RE: The voices in my head. (6/15/2009 9:59:36 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

quote:

silly question indeed, how do you explain WAFFLES to them?
LOL, Oddly enough, the topic just never came up. I mentioned earlier that I could allow the voices to take over control of my body, and in that case they could walk around and interact with our world, experiencing things through my body. Unfortunatly, I have no memory of what goes on while one of them is in charge, so can't tell you in any great detail about what transpired, but I do know they all loved chocolate, especially the girls (Day and Night).




Just goes to show.. that all women.. even those imaginary.. love choccy! *smiles


And thanks.. btw.. for answering one of my questions...

Kinda made the hair on the back of my neck stand up.. cause now i don't know.. Was hearing my name suddenly screamed in a quiet..empty room..schizophrenia? What about the voices that tugged at me with many lil hands?
Is it possible.. to have short term schizophrenic episodes in a lifetime.. with only 2 or three instances of hearing voices. or.. is it always manifesting itself?



Arpig -> RE: The voices in my head. (6/15/2009 10:10:15 PM)

quote:

Is it possible.. to have short term schizophrenic episodes in a lifetime.. with only 2 or three instances of hearing voices. or.. is it always manifesting itself?
I don't know. I have never inquired, mind you my interest in the subject was pretty minor until I was daignosed. I know that my voices are not always present (the schizo girl I spoke about earlier. well in her case, she always had voices in her head 24/7, 365 days a year). I can go several days without any voices, but the general voices are present most of the time. From the descriptions given to me on the other side, I gather that for them, as well, the voices were not always present, they showed up at random different times. Given that fact, I would suppose it would be possible for somebody to only hear their voices 2-3 times in a lifetime. However, voices are only one symptom of schizo disorders, and in and of themselves do not define a schizophrenic, they are simply the sexiest of the symptoms. If you are worried, then by all means go see a shrink, but if the voices are not present, and you have no other symptoms, then personally i wouldn't worry about it. You may want to ask somebody else if you seem to fit the criteria, because I don't know just how reliable a judge of these things a schizo might be. To learn more about the various symptoms of schizo disorders go to the following page: http://www.schizophrenia.com/diag.php#common They have this cool self tester, but unfortunatly it is down at the moment.



Vampz -> RE: The voices in my head. (6/15/2009 10:21:44 PM)

It is almost like you are saying you communicate w/ others on a parallel universe.

Plus, I think you are giving personal examples of your archetypes. The various voices I mean.





scifi1133 -> RE: The voices in my head. (6/15/2009 11:14:34 PM)

All I can say is wow. This has been one of the mosy facinating things I have ever read. Arig thank you very much for allowing us into your world. I know it must have been scary to make that first post. I am also happy to see all the support that has been given on this thread, and I would like to add my support as well. I will be following this thread with great interest. I have some questions but I want to flush them out so to speak before I ask. Thanks again.



sophia37 -> RE: The voices in my head. (6/16/2009 4:36:27 AM)

Well. Rarely do I revisit a topic. But I woke up this morning and the first thing that sprang to mind was this thread. So here I am, back again to read what's cookin. lol

This is simultaneously heavy, humorous frightening and fascinating, all at the same time. The Destroyer image makes my mind spin. I re-read it to try and get it straight. Exceptionally complex. Plus I was really blown away that in high school you knew geometry that hadn't been yet presented. Now how does that happen? If one could tap in to the amazing parts and filter out the destructive parts, well then, this would be really something.

Whats a drag to me is that the voices start out in a way that draws you in, (no surprise to me!) but then become a negative force. Its all so seductive. I'm telling you. I'd get nothing done. But then like you, perhaps I'd find the moment to snap out of it. I wonder why they can overtake you, then you find yourself wandering around in the cold. To me, that's like my aunt with dementia. She's slowly sliding into her own little disconnected world. Yet with dementia sometimes you snap out of it and have vivid recall and lucidity.

All right. Thats my little two cents worth like some sort of two minute ad. So never mind me. I'm here to see what other people say. Continue please.





sirsholly -> RE: The voices in my head. (6/16/2009 5:51:21 AM)

quote:

I'm here to see what other people say.


i have read the entire thread several times and am astounded at Arpigs honesty and courage.

*standing ovation* [sm=applause.gif][sm=applause.gif][sm=applause.gif][sm=applause.gif][sm=applause.gif]



Arpig -> RE: The voices in my head. (6/16/2009 7:11:13 AM)

quote:

This is simultaneously heavy, humorous frightening and fascinating, all at the same time. The Destroyer image makes my mind spin. I re-read it to try and get it straight. Exceptionally complex. Plus I was really blown away that in high school you knew geometry that hadn't been yet presented. Now how does that happen? If one could tap in to the amazing parts and filter out the destructive parts, well then, this would be really something.
Ok, I just want to clarify something, I did not understand all about geometry, I was giving an example about suddenly understanding an aspect of it, I can't remember what its called, but, if I recall correctly (it was rather a long time ago), its the one about getting the length of the hypotenuse: the square of the length of the hypotenuse is equal to the sum of the square of the other two sides. Anyway, that was just an example of the sort of thing that I meant by having thoughts that were not my own. There were lots of others, but they don't show how the thought wasn't "mine". I guess I had been reading ahead, or perhaps I had seen or heard about the theorem somewhere without actively remembering it. I now no longer have these sort of thoughts, they stopped pretty much when the voices apeared.

quote:

Whats a drag to me is that the voices start out in a way that draws you in, (no surprise to me!) but then become a negative force. Its all so seductive. I'm telling you. I'd get nothing done.
Well, my general voices have always been a negative force, and the individual voices have not so far turned on me, but perhaps they would given time. I guess that when they first present, the voices have to gain your trust, they have to befriend you first.



Arpig -> RE: The voices in my head. (6/16/2009 7:20:26 AM)

quote:

It is almost like you are saying you communicate w/ others on a parallel universe.

Plus, I think you are giving personal examples of your archetypes. The various voices I mean.


Well, they did indeed claim they were from a paralell universe [:)]. That is one of the things that made it very appealing. One aspect that made me more inclined to believe them was that the voices did not say they wanted me to "speard the word" or anything like that, they had a message for me, not for the whole world.

I don't really understand what is meant by "personal archetypes" but I googled it, and if what wikipedia says is correct, then I don't think they really fit, but it could be, I mean I don't really understand either the voices, or archetypes so its hard to say.[;)]

And thank you scifi & holly



cpK69 -> RE: The voices in my head. (6/16/2009 7:21:14 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

I guess that when they first present, the voices have to gain your trust, they have to befriend you first.



I find this idea fascinating. I am trying to understand why ‘you’ (the voices) would need to befriend you. I would think if anyone would know how to get you to do something, it would be… you.

Kim



sophia37 -> RE: The voices in my head. (6/16/2009 7:27:31 AM)

 What’s hard for me to understand is that your voices cant hear what other people are saying to you.  You have to repeat the sentence to your inner spirit and THEN it will talk back. That’s quite the mystery.



cpK69 -> RE: The voices in my head. (6/16/2009 7:30:18 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sophia37

What’s hard for me to understand is that your voices cant hear what other people are saying to you.  You have to repeat the sentence to your inner spirit and THEN it will talk back. That’s quite the mystery.


I thought that was intriguing, as well. Especially sinse he is still being him when it is happening.

Kim
 



Arpig -> RE: The voices in my head. (6/16/2009 7:43:17 AM)

I don't know why I had to do the repeating as well, but that's how it worked with them, except for Samas. He was an exeption to pretty much all the rules. Samas could engage in  3-way conversation quite easily (of course I had to pass on his side to the other person), but I don't recall any of the others doing this. I don't recall any of the others doing so without me acting as "translater". The individual voices seemed to be utterly unaware of the real world around me, but the general voices are fully aware of the world, they see and hear what I do.



Arpig -> RE: The voices in my head. (6/16/2009 7:50:17 AM)

A little update on the meds effects....I feel really stoned, but not in a good way[:'(] However the voices are gone, except for Samas, and he is just a vague whisper I cannot hear him clearly enough to make out what he is saying, but I do know it is him. So the new meds seem rather effective!![:)]

However, the old meds started out just as effective (just not as quickly), but that eventually wore off.



Arpig -> RE: The voices in my head. (6/16/2009 8:06:11 AM)

quote:

I find this idea fascinating. I am trying to understand why ‘you’ (the voices) would need to befriend you. I would think if anyone would know how to get you to do something, it would be… you.

Kim


Well, its because while the voices are indeed you, they do not seem to be. They appear to be outside of you. They claim to be something apart from you. Now please understand, I have no extensive knowledge, just a bit of reading, and exchanging some experiences on here. Based on that there does seem to be a pattern. As to why, well you tell me, if you suddenly heard a voice in your head, would you just believe it and trust its judgement right away? Generally no. Even when the voices manifest at around 10 to 15 (the usual time for it to happen) the person hearing the voices is likely to understand that its not normal to do so. It takes time for one to break down their inhibitions and to trust the voices' judgement.

I guess its hard for somebody who has never heard voices to understand how they actually present themselves, so here goes. I will describe what the gebneral voices are like for me. Many of them are just evil voices saying things to me, they make no effort to persuade or influence, they just issue commands, saying things like "Go hang yourself from that tree", "Set fire to that house" things like that. Other of the general voices are more insidious, they will actually try to persuade me to do things. They will go on about it, giving reasons to do it. Most (I would say roughly 90%) of their reasons are that it would be fun, or feel good, or things along those lines. These voices have never tried to befriend me, and I have been able to disregard what they are telling me all along. The individual voices, however, are a different kettle of fish. Because they befriended me, I learned to trust their judgement, and even activly sought out their advice on things. I don't know what I would do if they told me to do something "bad", but I am pretty sure that, given the irrational thinking and paranoia that goes along with the disorder, I could have been persuaded pretty easily to do something.



cpK69 -> RE: The voices in my head. (6/16/2009 8:37:13 AM)

I’m sort of at odds on how to take the similarities between what you describe, and what I experience. It makes me wonder if they are just coincidence, or is there some connection, somehow.

I’ve exchanged thoughts with another, who was saying things much closer to what you describe; something about being involved with a great evil in another life. In our discussion, they asked me to look for a place on the map, that they said they were originally from. When I looked, I found a place that could fit the description, and nearby I also found an image that resembled the person asking; and not in a vague way either.

I don’t know what to think.

Kim



Arpig -> RE: The voices in my head. (6/16/2009 8:48:42 AM)

Well cp, i don't know what to tell you, but I would keep a close eye on that. If the entity reappears then perhaps its time to seek out some help. I am not in any way qualified to judge these things, so my best advice is: if in any doubt, go see a shrink.



cpK69 -> RE: The voices in my head. (6/16/2009 9:00:45 AM)

I think I was misunderstood. The one I was talking to was a living person, used to be a member of CM.

I will keep your advice in mind though; still, I’ve got that one event. I am confident I did not just imagine it.

Kim



Arpig -> RE: The voices in my head. (6/16/2009 9:09:56 AM)

Ah well that really changes things. I thought you meant you were communicating with some entity along the lines of my voices.



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