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Am I being unreasonable? - 8/9/2009 1:10:10 AM

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Joined: 6/21/2008
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Here is the deal I need advice... My owner wanted me to cum tonight at my sisters house. I told him I did not feel comfortable cumming tonight because I was babysitting my sisters daughter and just didn't feel that it was OK to do so even if the child was asleep. My owner said I was being silly and unreasonable and that i am prudish. So my question is am I being silly/prudish here or does anyone think I have a reasonable explination.

Thank You :)

RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/9/2009 1:30:29 AM

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You are the way you are. Labels are irrelevant. You set a limit. That must be honored. Period. Yes, it really is that simple.

You are always 100% responsible for your free choice to consent, or to withold consent. Honor yourself and your choice.

(in reply to bubblesoffun)

RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/9/2009 1:34:04 AM

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It wouldn't be a problem for me, but it is for y ou. That is enough to say "no" and have it honored.

(in reply to aldompdx)

RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/9/2009 2:11:02 AM

Posts: 613
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From: San Diego, Ca
Status: offline

This all depends, what limits did you set at the beginning cause you can't change them after the fact. But more importantly is this someone that you have actually meet or are seeing in person or some wanking online thing?

Mike

(in reply to Lostkitten3)

RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/9/2009 2:21:17 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: bubblesoffun

Here is the deal I need advice... My owner wanted me to cum tonight at my sisters house. I told him I did not feel comfortable cumming tonight because I was babysitting my sisters daughter and just didn't feel that it was OK to do so even if the child was asleep. My owner said I was being silly and unreasonable and that i am prudish. So my question is am I being silly/prudish here or does anyone think I have a reasonable explination.

Thank You :)

You are not acting anything other than a responsible person who knows there is a right and wrong place to do things.Your owner on the other hand , is acting like an immature individual who is attempting to convince himself and others around him that he is entitled to be worthy of the title of owner by requiring such ridiculous acts.

_____________________________

Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself.
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(in reply to bubblesoffun)

RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/9/2009 2:27:20 AM

Posts: 28
Joined: 10/9/2007
From: Pittsburgh
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My thoughts as well, Mike. Is this your master (your profile says nothing about being owned) a casual play partner or some "online" thing? If its an online thing, it is, IMO not real sotherefore irrelevant. If its casual, you can do what you want. If this person is your master then you had best do what you are told.

-Ryan

< Message edited by Ryeguy91 -- 8/9/2009 2:29:33 AM >

(in reply to SirMIkeSD)

RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/9/2009 2:30:38 AM

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quote:

This all depends, what limits did you set at the beginning cause you can't change them after the fact

And why is that, exactly? Sorry, sub here, but still...
I've asked this in other threads, but have never gotten a good answer. In a previous thread, a poster stated that expecting a D to present every possible situation in which he might want to exert his dominance to a sub during negotiation was "ridiculous" and "unrealistic". So how can a sub be expected to know each and every possible situation that might be a hard limit from the get go?

Don't mean to jump on you, Mike, as I really enjoy your posts. I just don't get the "one chance to set limits" thing in the context of a relationship that includes growth, exploring, and expanding experiences. Really, how many subs would think of hard limiting "being commanded to come while babysitting my niece in her mother's home"????

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(in reply to SirMIkeSD)

RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/9/2009 3:18:44 AM

LillyoftheVally

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Yup and also no one seems to get on their high horse is subs remove limits.

To me (slightly off point of the op) communication means the ability to change parameters.

To the OP, I completely agree with you and I would have been uncomfortable in that situation also

_____________________________

'My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre, and that I am therefore excused from saving Universes.'

Nah I am not happy to see you either

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RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/9/2009 4:26:30 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: bubblesoffun

Here is the deal I need advice... My owner wanted me to cum tonight at my sisters house. I told him I did not feel comfortable cumming tonight because I was babysitting my sisters daughter and just didn't feel that it was OK to do so even if the child was asleep. My owner said I was being silly and unreasonable and that i am prudish. So my question is am I being silly/prudish here or does anyone think I have a reasonable explination.

Thank You :)

No, you are not being silly and prudish. Your being mature and intelligent about something that should never have been asked of you.

Personally, it's my thoughts that he had no flippin right to ask you to do such a thing. I would question his so called 'desire' for you to perform with a child near by. Just my thoughts though.

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.

(in reply to bubblesoffun)

RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/9/2009 5:35:16 AM

MasterMartinIndy

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Joined: 12/29/2008
Status: offline

Your at someones house baby sitting and your so called Owner wants you to do what. Reality check you dont what could happen during the time your doing this. Maybe you should be babysitting your so called Owner

< Message edited by MasterMartinIndy -- 8/9/2009 5:36:00 AM >

(in reply to IrishMist)

RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/9/2009 5:36:14 AM

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So are you going to go to this guy now and say na na na na these people don't think i am being unreasonable and prudish? On some level i can see where he could think you were being unreasonable and prudish -- people live many times with kids do stuff like this etc. I can also see how you might be uncomfortable and feel it would not be a good thing for you to do. So who is right and who is wrong is what you are basically asking ----- in the end -- you are, as you have disobeyed. Its that simple. I am not advocating you should have done it but in the end it was simple disobedience -- slaves of Men do that sometimes.

The thing is now due to same you may have consequences to face from him for your disobedience or he may not choose to give you consequences. Disobedience is disobedience. In the end, you may not have been unreasonable or silly but you were disobedient. Also, it really doesn't matter what OTHER people think about what you did -- most relationships are not based upon majority vote of strangers nor do most people run off to complain about what their dom or master said to strangers to validate their behavior. If you plan to stomp off and take the poll of strangers everytime he says something you don't like to somehow justify your disobedience -- i doubt you guys will last very long.

In the end, i believe with many -- have you even MET this guy or are you slap and tickle via telephone?

angel

< Message edited by barelynangel -- 8/9/2009 6:17:30 AM >

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(in reply to IrishMist)

RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/9/2009 5:44:30 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: bubblesoffun

Here is the deal I need advice... My owner wanted me to cum tonight at my sisters house. I told him I did not feel comfortable cumming tonight because I was babysitting my sisters daughter and just didn't feel that it was OK to do so even if the child was asleep. My owner said I was being silly and unreasonable and that i am prudish. So my question is am I being silly/prudish here or does anyone think I have a reasonable explination.

Thank You :)

you idenitfy as a slave, and you are owned. you were babysitting, and the child was asleep. how long does it take you to cum? i can understand your reluctance. i can also understand his comments.

a slave obeys... until they no longer obey... then they are no longer a slave to that man.

_____________________________

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Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to bubblesoffun)

RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/9/2009 6:13:19 AM

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In this day of web cam monitoring, I wouldn't be surprised if baby sitters were being watched.
Just something to keep in mind.

(in reply to bubblesoffun)

RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/9/2009 6:29:08 AM

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Joined: 4/19/2004
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quote:

My owner wanted me to cum tonight at my sisters house

I read the thread, just adding my question: what are you talking about?

(in reply to bubblesoffun)

RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/9/2009 6:48:40 AM

Level

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quote:

tazzy wrote:

you idenitfy as a slave, and you are owned. you were babysitting, and the child was asleep. how long does it take you to cum? i can understand your reluctance. i can also understand his comments.

a slave obeys... until they no longer obey... then they are no longer a slave to that man.

Bingo.

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to antipode)

RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/9/2009 6:55:00 AM

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quote:

most relationships are not based upon majority vote of strangers

my feelings, exactly. In most of these kind of threads, i always wonder how the sub takes the various opinions and recites them to their Dom (or vice-versa) as validation of their plight. Are there pie charts involved....at what point do they call the good folks at Gallup for assistace???

That being said OP, being arrested for abuse, neglect, or endangering the welfare of a minor just goes against my kink

. i would wonder what a person that doesn't seem to grasp the concept of "duty" was doing "owning" people at all. Best of luck.

_____________________________

Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you; you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for." -Bob Marley

(in reply to antipode)

RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/9/2009 6:55:00 AM

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bubbles, I'm lost. your profile clearly states that you are an unowned slavegirl. your last journal entry on 7/26/09 states that you've just been dumped and you will never give your heart to another. Two weeks later, you are posting here about an Owner who you feel is making unreasonable demands.

Slow down. Get to know what a prospective Dom wants and more importantly, what YOU want and what makes you tick.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

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RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/9/2009 7:22:19 AM

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Joined: 9/10/2008
From: Nashville, TN
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quote:

ORIGINAL: aldompdx

You are the way you are. Labels are irrelevant. You set a limit. That must be honored. Period. Yes, it really is that simple.

That doesn't sounds like a "limit" to me. It sounds like an inconvenience. She refers to her D-type as "owner" as classifies her profile as "slave". I'm sure if this had been a pre-discussed hard-limit, that information would have been divulged by now.

She disobeyed a order. Maybe if she's softly asked if she could be recused from doing the act rather than "telling him", it might have fallen more in line with the sort of mentality someone describing themselves in those parameters should have.

< Message edited by NihilusZero -- 8/9/2009 7:38:26 AM >

_____________________________

"I know it's all a game
I know they're all insane
I know it's all in vain
I know that I'm to blame."
~Siouxsie & the Banshees

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(in reply to aldompdx)

RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/9/2009 7:24:01 AM

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From: Nashville, TN
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lostkitten3

It wouldn't be a problem for me, but it is for y ou. That is enough to say "no" and have it honored.

No it isn't! Is everyone going batty today?

Slave: "I want a dynamic in which I'm expected to obey!"
D-type: "Okay! Now do this!"
Slave: "But.....I don't wanna...."

_____________________________

"I know it's all a game
I know they're all insane
I know it's all in vain
I know that I'm to blame."
~Siouxsie & the Banshees

NihilusZero.com

CM Sex God du Jour
CM Hall Monitor

(in reply to Lostkitten3)

RE: Am I being unreasonable? - 8/9/2009 7:25:07 AM

LillyoftheVally

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Joined: 7/22/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: NihilusZero

That doesn't sounds like a "limit" to me. It sounds like an inconvenience. She refers to her D-type as "owner" as classifies her profile as "slave". I'm sure if this had been a pre-discussed hard-limit, that information would have been divulged by now.

Thing is NZ when you set up limits can you always be sure that you remember everything? What if something comes up that never crossed your mind before but that you know you can't do

_____________________________

'My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre, and that I am therefore excused from saving Universes.'

Nah I am not happy to see you either

(in reply to NihilusZero)

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