RE: Foot worshipping Dom

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DemonKia -> RE: Foot worshipping Dom (10/7/2009 4:11:51 PM)
lol Don't sweat the combat, this is a place where self-identified 'dominants' & 'sadists' congregate, so a certain eau d'National Geographic is kinda 'natural' . . . . Or, dare I say, 'twue', lol . . . .. . Your post elicited this thought from me cranium, tho' it's not 'directed at you', I just have lots of random stuff that drifts out of the ol' cogitator . . . . . lol . . . . & a bunch of it is foot related . .. . . I suspect that the details of how 'dom licks foot' could / would shift some people's perceptions of what was 'properly domly' or not, & others would not see any difference . . . . & that division could be on either side of the previously sketched us-v-them chasm of foot-lick-domly-or-not . . . . . . . For instance, let me sketch out three possible maledomly / femsubly scenarios, full of out-of-my-hiney hypotheticals: Maledom has femsub bound, in pain, positioned for his maximal use & enjoyment, immovable, & with her feet held just so he can suck on her toes while he pounds her . . .. . He might even nibble or even bite the tender, delicate flesh of the foot . . . . . . & other stuff . . . . . calms self, takes deep breath Alternately . . . . Maledom knows that femsub finds the maledom acting at all subordinate to be deeply humiliating & 'makes' her go to a femdom party & role-play thru the evening as a femdom with her D/M playing the sub & worshiping her feet, knowing that it shames & embarrasses her . . . . Or . . . . Maledom lying on floor, watching the widescreen -- cuz that's where he likes it. Femsub, sitting on couch with feet bracketing the pillow her D/M's head is on -- cuz he specifically told her to. He takes her foot & starts to idly lick & suck & kiss & bite it & tells her to hold still, hold her leg up for him, not wiggle, not giggle, not get tired, hold the foot this way or that, behave herself, yes she can use her hands to hold her leg up, now take the hands off -- or she won't get any rewards. mmmmmm, okay, wank on, wank off, wank on, wank off, all better now, lol All scenarios played to both person's mutual sexual / emotional / relationship satisfaction . . . . .. .. There's ~6.7 billion people on the planet, & darn few shoes that fit them all. Even paring it down to half or a third, that's a lotta people for anyone to try to shoehorn into anything . . . . .

SimplyIsaac -> RE: Foot worshipping Dom (10/7/2009 4:33:09 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DemonKia lol Don't sweat the combat, this is a place where self-identified 'dominants' & 'sadists' congregate, so a certain eau d'National Geographic is kinda 'natural' . . . . Or, dare I say, 'twue', lol . . . .. . Your post elicited this thought from me cranium, tho' it's not 'directed at you', I just have lots of random stuff that drifts out of the ol' cogitator . . . . . lol . . . . & a bunch of it is foot related . .. . . I suspect that the details of how 'dom licks foot' could / would shift some people's perceptions of what was 'properly domly' or not, & others would not see any difference . . . . & that division could be on either side of the previously sketched us-v-them chasm of foot-lick-domly-or-not . . . . . . . For instance, let me sketch out three possible maledomly / femsubly scenarios, full of out-of-my-hiney hypotheticals: Maledom has femsub bound, in pain, positioned for his maximal use & enjoyment, immovable, & with her feet held just so he can suck on her toes while he pounds her . . .. . He might even nibble or even bite the tender, delicate flesh of the foot . . . . . . & other stuff . . . . . calms self, takes deep breath Alternately . . . . Maledom knows that femsub finds the maledom acting at all subordinate to be deeply humiliating & 'makes' her go to a femdom party & role-play thru the evening as a femdom with her D/M playing the sub & worshiping her feet, knowing that it shames & embarrasses her . . . . Or . . . . Maledom lying on floor, watching the widescreen -- cuz that's where he likes it. Femsub, sitting on couch with feet bracketing the pillow her D/M's head is on -- cuz he specifically told her to. He takes her foot & starts to idly lick & suck & kiss & bite it & tells her to hold still, hold her leg up for him, not wiggle, not giggle, not get tired, hold the foot this way or that, behave herself, yes she can use her hands to hold her leg up, now take the hands off -- or she won't get any rewards. mmmmmm, okay, wank on, wank off, wank on, wank off, all better now, lol All scenarios played to both person's mutual sexual / emotional / relationship satisfaction . . . . .. .. There's ~6.7 billion people on the planet, & darn few shoes that fit them all. Even paring it down to half or a third, that's a lotta people for anyone to try to shoehorn into anything . . . . . Scenario #1: Still...odd. But hey, sounds like some hot sex (that is if I got "pounding" right). Scenario #2: Sounds like an awful lot to cover up the fact he still wants to suck toe. needless to say, he chose the right venue. [:D] Scenario #3: Male dom is on floor, she's on couch? He's sucking her toes? LOL. It must just be me. I still find it flirting with something overtly symbolic. now a dominant guy can go after his girl's feet and munch away to his delight, but he's going to need to find some way of making it distractingly painful, or think up some grandiose psychodrama (like example #2) to avoid the all too easy "uh huh," just around the corner. But hey, that's my take.

Ownednoperated -> RE: Foot worshipping Dom (10/7/2009 4:41:01 PM)
A dom can be used as a toilet if he loves it, but ask his submissive to do it and his dominance and rank status and dom essence WILL BE DILUTED in the subs eyes, regardless if he can do it or not. Come on, kissing a foot is a submissive and respecting act.

DemonKia -> RE: Foot worshipping Dom (10/7/2009 4:55:23 PM)
Hmmmmmmmm . . . . . The first meta-thoughts are (a) that I can imagine dozens more scenarios, of all kinds, around this 'dom licks sub toe' theme & (b) that very imagination is supposed to be of value in a BDSM venue -- & sometimes I 'get' that more strongly than other times . .. . . smirk &, of course, my idiosyncratically-individual picture of 'twue domliness' incorporates so much doms-don't-give-a-shit-what-anyone-else-thinks-about-their-'twue'-domliness that it pretty much crowds most other considerations out the door. Personally, when I'm in subby-cruising-doms modes, the doms who don't care what other people think of their 'bottom-ish' desires are way more attractive to me than the ones running around asserting their authoritativeness & judging other people's relative domliness, especially when those evaluations are based on whether this or that 'bottom activity' is or is not 'twuly submissive' or not . . . . . Sheeeeesh, I feel sorry for the those who are so straightjacketed by the Doms-must-always-top mentality . . . . .. & I subscribe to a model of competition-with-self way way way over competition-with-other, but that's purely a choice-of-kink kinda thing, to me . . . . . So, a lot of this who's-more-domly is null data to me . . . . . &, yeah, those that get hung up in those contests are rendered less attractive in the process. I'm as likely to psycho-therapeutically analyze the protestations of the oh-you're-not-weally-twuly-dominant-if-you-do-thus-&-such types as being emblematic of their own issues as I am to think those protestations mean anything 'real' about the 'true nature of reality' . . . . . Oh, & yeah, pounding means exactly what it sounds like it means, lol. quote: ORIGINAL: SimplyIsaac Scenario #1: Still...odd. But hey, sounds like some hot sex (that is if I got "pounding" right). Scenario #2: Sounds like an awful lot to cover up the fact he still wants to suck toe. needless to say, he chose the right venue. [:D] Scenario #3: Male dom is on floor, she's on couch? He's sucking her toes? LOL. It must just be me. I still find it flirting with something overtly symbolic. now a dominant guy can go after his girl's feet and munch away to his delight, but he's going to need to find some way of making it distractingly painful, or think up some grandiose psychodrama (like example #2) to avoid the all too easy "uh huh," just around the corner. But hey, that's my take.

SimplyIsaac -> RE: Foot worshipping Dom (10/7/2009 6:57:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DemonKia & of course, my idiosyncratically-individual picture of 'twue domliness' incorporates so much doms-don't-give-a-shit-what-anyone-else-thinks-about-their-'twue'-domliness that it pretty much crowds most other considerations out the door. In theory that sounds good and for a lot of male tops cool beans... reality is that for those men and women who take m&s seriously, they are inevitably going to have to consider their image in the eyes of their girls to a certain degree. You can crowd her consideration out the door if you want, get on the floor and start sucking on her peds... but don't be too surprised if she starts to wonder "what's up here." quote: ORIGINAL: DemonKia authoritativeness & judging other people's relative domliness, especially when those evaluations are based on whether this or that 'bottom activity' is or is not 'twuly submissive' or not . . . . . Sheeeeesh, I feel sorry for the those who are so straightjacketed by the Doms-must-always-top mentality . . . . .. Well, a dominant man or woman should probably be dominant, wouldn't you say? Part of that involves retaining dominance and enforcing submission. As for topping... well, that's another thing, i've always thought. Knowing the difference isn't putting myself in a straightjacket...not confusing the two keeps me out of one... I know that much.

DemonKia -> RE: Foot worshipping Dom (10/7/2009 10:04:30 PM)
Huh. Well. I live 3 hours drive from San Francisco. I go to munches, play parties, classes, & whatever else kink thing I can lay hands on in the area. This is Cali, there's a lot of freakin' kinky people hereabouts . . . . . & the thing is, I don't encounter what you're talking about, quoted below, in those meat-life interactions . . . . Firstly, the out-&-organized kinksters I meet are far more likely to identify as at least a little bit switchy & / or to be otherwise completely comfortable with switchiness, relative to how this stuff plays out here on these message boards . . . . . & those who are solidly D or s or whatever don't seem to spend any time going around evaluating how D or s other people are . . . . Maybe they do it privately, at home, afterwards. I like gossip & speculation as much as the next person, maybe more, so I can't begrudge them that . . .. . &, frankly? Totally honestly? The ones who seem to get the most action are the bi-switches, but, then, that makes so much sense thought about from some angles (ya know, like they get to play with both other switchy types & they can play with the more dedicated D & s types, & generally -- I know I'm biased -- but they just seem more fun, as a group) . . . . & I've seen all kinds of play, much of it nothing like all these cliched notions of what a Dom has to be or do. I'm pretty good at spotting who's D & who's s at these things precisely because this stuff has nothing to do with outward stuff & everything to do with attitude . . .. .. . I generally don't make the mistake of thinking any less of the domliness of some Daddy instructing his boy to tie Daddy's junk up properly in a bondage class, so that the boy can more effectively give Daddy the CBT that Daddy likes, just the way the Daddy wants it done . . . . . When it comes to 'heavy players' (those indulging in edge play activities, almost always with long-term partners) that I know of, again, just as likely to be switche-y as to be strictly D or s. But the more important thing, I think, is that if what's quoted below is what you need to blow your hair back, great! quote: ORIGINAL: SimplyIsaac ... reality is that for those men and women who take m&s seriously, they are inevitably going to have to consider their image in the eyes of their girls to a certain degree. You can crowd her consideration out the door if you want, get on the floor and start sucking on her peds... but don't be too surprised if she starts to wonder "what's up here." It's weird for you to start dictating standards for some group (that's the part I colored & italicized) when you were jumping Des for over-generalizing earlier . .. . . What you say there might be true for some, might not be so for others . . . .

SimplyIsaac -> RE: Foot worshipping Dom (10/7/2009 11:24:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DemonKia Huh. Well. I live 3 hours drive from San Francisco. I go to munches, play parties, classes, & whatever else kink thing I can lay hands on in the area. This is Cali, there's a lot of freakin' kinky people hereabouts . . . . . & the thing is, I don't encounter what you're talking about, quoted below, in those meat-life interactions . . . . Well, of course you don't. There's an entire world of difference between kinky people doing kinky things and organizing around kinky things and having workshops on kinky things vs. training your girl to obey, know her place and inspiring her to worship and look up to you...thats my experience at least. quote: ORIGINAL: DemonKia It's weird for you to start dictating standards for some group... Doing no such thing. What I'm describing is common sense and reality as I see it if you want to make a m&s relationship work. quote: ORIGINAL: DemonKia What you say there might be true for some, might not be so for others . . . . If you exclusively like topping and bottoming and sensation play and kinky sex with neat outfits, it won't apply. Just ignore me. [;)]

DemonKia -> RE: Foot worshipping Dom (10/7/2009 11:41:59 PM)
[sm=rofl.gif] bent over, breathless, laughing so hard Jus', that's it, I yield, you are clearly a twue dom & all those people I know in real life are quislings living pale imitations of the weal domliness that you have command of . . . . . The following quoted in it's entirety, cuz it's funny . . . . . quote: ORIGINAL: SimplyIsaac quote: ORIGINAL: DemonKia Huh. Well. I live 3 hours drive from San Francisco. I go to munches, play parties, classes, & whatever else kink thing I can lay hands on in the area. This is Cali, there's a lot of freakin' kinky people hereabouts . . . . . & the thing is, I don't encounter what you're talking about, quoted below, in those meat-life interactions . . . . Well, of course you don't. There's an entire world of difference between kinky people doing kinky things and organizing around kinky things and having workshops on kinky things vs. training your girl to obey, know her place and inspiring her to worship and look up to you...thats my experience at least. quote: ORIGINAL: DemonKia It's weird for you to start dictating standards for some group... Doing no such thing. What I'm describing is common sense and reality as I see it if you want to make a m&s relationship work. quote: ORIGINAL: DemonKia What you say there might be true for some, might not be so for others . . . . If you exclusively like topping and bottoming and sensation play and kinky sex with neat outfits, it won't apply. Just ignore me. [;)] Totally off-topic, tho' . .. . Again. Why do we quit veering from the delicious subject of doms nibbling on delectable subbie toes? I read the OP as a solicitation to imagine scenarios under which a dom could slurp sub foot & retain domliness, or variants, but I'm sure that's a kink in my view . . . . . lol ETA: [emphasis for greater funny]

WyldHrt -> RE: Foot worshipping Dom (10/8/2009 1:07:44 AM)
quote: True a master could be used as a toilet slave by his submissive or give her a long, sensual backrub, or kiss her feet, but who is really the one being served by these submissive acts of foot kissing, back rubs? Woah, I missed this. We can't have sensual backrubs, either? Someone needs to talk to the subby union about this! How about a D who draws a bath for his sub and orders her to rest, because she had a really long, shitty day at work? Is that allowed? [8\|] Obviously, I missed the page in the subby handbook that lists the officially sanctioned Domly activities vs the "he's really a sub" activities. Dammit [>:] If someone could furnish me with a list of the things I need to forbid my Dom to do, in order to preserve his Domliness in my subby eyes, I would greatly appreciate it. I'm quite sure that he will comply and act only in the approved Domly manner from now on... LMAO! [:D] quote: A dom can be used as a toilet if he loves it, but ask his submissive to do it and his dominance and rank status and dom essence WILL BE DILUTED in the subs eyes, regardless if he can do it or not. Not into the toilet thing in any way, but kindly don't speak for all of us. quote: Come on, kissing a foot is a submissive and respecting act. It's amazing to me that there are those on this thread asserting that kissing a foot is a universally and "obviously" submissive act, when there are several others who completely disagree. As others have said, many D/s and M/s relationships are very much based on mutual respect, so that argument is pretty much out the window as well.

GabrielleSlave -> RE: Foot worshipping Dom (10/8/2009 1:52:06 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WyldHrt It's amazing to me that there are those on this thread asserting that kissing a foot is a universally and "obviously" submissive act, when there are several others who completely disagree. Naturally people will disagree on this as on any other issue you could possibly come up with on BDSM or any other topic lol! It comes down to how folk are wired surely? i mean, you can say the policitcally correct thing of how a Dom should do what they want and to heck with others' irrelevant feelings, or you can make a brave stance and tell it how it is to you. There is (and this is repeating what has been said on endless other threads on other things) such a thing as doing what is right for your own relationship and circumstances. To me, anything which diminishes my Sir's dominance over me in my eyes is a turn off. That is not to say that He can't and never does anything which could be seen as submissive, heck i have even flogged Him in the past, under orders. It was something He wanted and needed so He got it. i admit to having to take some time to get my head round it, but eventually i could reconcile it. My feelings about a Dom kneeling at my feet and licking them, will like as not remain unchanged for now, but i wonder if this is simply a matter of stereotyping the action? If i was not aware of Dommes and male subs worshipping feet, would i feel differently?

daintydimples -> RE: Foot worshipping Dom (10/8/2009 3:27:10 AM)
There are many who see kissing a foot as submissive, just as there are many who consider kneeling submissive. I would say these two acts are such embedded symbols of submission as to be almost iconic. The two acts together, doubly so. But this is b/c we see so much of D/s as physical, when (in a good dynamic at least) it's primarily mental. How you go about doing things does matter...on both sides of the kneel. For 20 years I was married to a foot lover. He didn't "worship" my feet in the way a sub male would, his attitude was more, "they are MY feet, I'll do whatever I want with them." Attitude is everything.

Level -> RE: Foot worshipping Dom (10/8/2009 3:47:31 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WyldHrt quote: True a master could be used as a toilet slave by his submissive or give her a long, sensual backrub, or kiss her feet, but who is really the one being served by these submissive acts of foot kissing, back rubs? Woah, I missed this. We can't have sensual backrubs, either? Someone needs to talk to the subby union about this! How about a D who draws a bath for his sub and orders her to rest, because she had a really long, shitty day at work? Is that allowed? [8\|] Nope, no more back rubs! It's not done, you know...dominants can't do anything like that, because they'll be seen as submitting. Now, it's okay that they're submitting to some asshat idea of someone else, and submitting to some fucktard "culture" that does not permit certain behaviour.

GabrielleSlave -> RE: Foot worshipping Dom (10/8/2009 6:55:04 AM)
Now stay away from the backrubbbing thing lol!! If Sir wants to do it then let Him lol!

GYPSYMAMBO -> RE: Foot worshipping Dom (10/8/2009 7:12:56 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: GabrielleSlave Naturally people will disagree on this as on any other issue you could possibly come up with on BDSM There is (and this is repeating what has been said on endless other threads on other things) such a thing as doing what is right for your own relationship and circumstances. To me, anything which diminishes my Sir's dominance over me in my eyes is a turn off. . i , but i wonder if this is simply a matter of stereotyping the action? If i was not aware of Dommes and male subs worshipping feet, would i feel differently? I applaude 1) your humour and introspection 2)taking a look at your own process and ideas and where they came from in order to formulate your OWN feelings etc.. 3) questioning...good good good YOU will GROW with this.. kuddos!!..G GM

Ownednoperated -> RE: Foot worshipping Dom (10/8/2009 8:36:16 AM)
If "you" see nothing submissive in your master sucking your toes, being pissed on by you, bowing to you, serving you drinks while rubbing your feet for you, then more power to you, LOL. Sure a dominant can do whatever they want, but is it really wise for a dom to serve his submissive that way you that way when you're the one who is supposed to be serving? I love your complaint about some 'list". Uh, yes, I have a list of things I wouldn't accept in a master and I bet YOU HAVE a LIST too. The fact that the pack disagrees and thinks it's fine that a dom worships a submissive girl's feet makes no difference to me, you and your cheerleading friends, while fun and exciting for you, mean nothing to me. Your herd isn't the rest of the world, they are just a handful of switch kinksters and very different from other serious masters who train girls to actually serve THEM. So, get used to it, your small world is just that - a handful of kinky people and not the majority. And yes, a master who doesn't suck toes or bow to his submissive and service her with backrubs can respect her just as much as the dom who serves his girl with backrubs and kisses his submissive's girl feet. Just because a dom respects his submissive girl, that DOESN'T mean he has to bow and kiss her feet, for crying out loud.

Ownednoperated -> RE: Foot worshipping Dom (10/8/2009 8:42:32 AM)
No one here is saying you can't kiss the feet of your sub girl, but why would you? She's the one who wants to do the serving and I guarantee you if you start down the road of serving your sub, in the back of her mind she'll start questioning who is serving who?

GYPSYMAMBO -> RE: Foot worshipping Dom (10/8/2009 8:55:58 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Ownednoperated No one here is saying you can't kiss the feet of your sub girl, but why would you? He would because he WANTS TO.. you don't like the idea because it your opinion/belief its called a preference.. DO not mistake your OPINION for FACT Playing with her feet is not much different than tits or ass..in fact feet are a KNOWN 2ndary erotic zone.. Would some of you be all bent out of shape...if it was an ear..? neck? hair> NO because feet are on the ground...feet are not seen as sexual.. feet do not arouse all... HE is using her feet for himself..he had access to all of her.. HER feet are his.. GM GM

thishereboi -> RE: Foot worshipping Dom (10/8/2009 8:59:06 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Ownednoperated A dom can be used as a toilet if he loves it, but ask his submissive to do it and his dominance and rank status and dom essence WILL BE DILUTED in the MYeyes, regardless if he can do it or not. Come on, kissing a foot is a submissive and respecting act. Just had to fix that, we wouldn't want people thinking your trying to project your ideas onto ALL subs.

RedMagic1 -> RE: Foot worshipping Dom (10/8/2009 9:30:51 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Ownednoperated Sure a dominant can do whatever they want, but is it really wise for a dom to serve his submissive that way you that way when you're the one who is supposed to be serving? I decide what city, state, and country we will live in. All financial decisions are ultimately mine. She's about to move away from her adult children in order to be with me. Her stated role in the relationship is to support me and do whatever I need to advance my career and life objectives. What is that, except the role of a subordinate, serving the person in charge? Please note that part of "providing support" includes "domming" me in certain ways. Making sure I floss regularly is one example. Not a very sexy-wexy example, but I'm talking about nitty-gritty real life here, not some theoretical "true submission." Meanwhile, you are worried about what happens in bed! Honestly, I can't be bothered with what our sexual expressions "really mean." I just want to enjoy every minute of it. If that makes me 1950s vanilla, or a kinky switch, I am fine with that. Label me -- and her -- however you wish. I guess my question to anyone who disagrees is this: Are you as happy as I am? And, if not, why should I pay attention to anything you say?

SimplyIsaac -> RE: Foot worshipping Dom (10/8/2009 9:38:17 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DemonKia [sm=rofl.gif] bent over, breathless, laughing so hard Jus', that's it, I yield, you are clearly a twue dom & all those people I know in real life are quislings living pale imitations of the weal domliness that you have command of . . . . . Never claimed to be a "twue dom". That's just smarming rather than addressing comments. I don't agree with your tactics, but they are yours to have. Further I don't know the real life friends you speak of, so I guess I'll just have to take your word on that. In the spirit of smarm, I do know that you claim to be "new to BDSM relationships", as of 9/15/09 in your journal. Not sure if that's really relevant to this discussion or not, but I feel it might be if you're gonna start throwing that "twue" word around. But seriously, I've been to clubs and play parties in LV LA & NY. Not saying there's anything wrong with them, but I don't look to those venues as good examples of m&s. But… that's my obviously "domly" take, right? [:D]

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