RE: local BDSM community (Full Version)

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DesFIP -> RE: local BDSM community (11/15/2009 7:06:15 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Hierodule

I have a question related to this and don't think it warrants a new thread. Its was part of the original topic but i don't think it has been fully answered yet. Correct me if I'm wrong.

Do you think an individual, a Dominant, who participated in power exchange relationships for 20 years but never went to any clubs or met with others who lived the same way, is just as "experienced" as a Dominant who had been involved in these kind of relationships for a similar amount of time but was very active in their local community, attending seminars watching others scene etc?

I think its more important to consider a Dominant becasue they have to know what is safe and what isn't since they are in control and literally have someone's life in their hands.



Depends what you're looking for. If you're into very edgy play, something new and exciting each time, then a community is more likely to offer a great rigger and a great needle top, and someone who is greatin temporary brands. But that means you're playing with three different people.

Because no one person is equally interested and involved in every possible aspect.


But you don't need workshops to learn about the dangers of breath play. You don't need workshops to know that suspending someone from an eye hook shoved in sheetrock is a bad idea. You can learn all of this from reading the local newspapers. And certainly there is more info out in books than you'll get in one small group. See the acknowledged rigger in your group who teaches others what to do may only know his one style. So if he's into shibari and you're into damsel in distress, then you won't necessarily learn what you want from him. In that case you may well do better to read the Knotty Boys books and see their youtube videos.

The edgier the play is, the more you need to learn about it. But there's info all over if you look. In many ways isn't that what collarme is? A giant munch with backbiting and so on? But there are dozens of top riggers here who can make suggestions of how to do what you want and what to avoid, not just one.




GYPSYMAMBO -> RE: local BDSM community (11/15/2009 7:29:53 AM)

OP:

The area I moved from had tried to start a small group and it fizzled out..
They had some good first workshops though.
The city is extremely "religious" and very gossipy and judgemental so many end up going to 2 cities..one 300 mi away and another 450..mi

I have moved to the 300 mi away one..for my art life and my BDSM/D-s life..

I found ( in MO only)..that there are 2...maybe 3 different "faces" here..
public..private and "mixed"
The public is *soemtimes* really dramatic..showy(contrived)..beautiful people heirarchacal system..
The private divided into groups you meet and click with is more of the learning...sharing..closed group kind..where you can find something comfortable for you...such as the couple who has set up their acerage for events...and another group that sets up a CAMP OUT weekend.

The DOMME women's group is fun that meets once a month and I found the DOMs VERY helpful .
The instant I moved here..they e mailed..welcomed..invited and also informed me of abusers etc.
and "mixed" is fun and loyal...open arms from
off shoot..mixed..TVs,.TG,Gays,LesbiansD's and s's,  T-girlz..CD's..who are in the BDSM/SM/D-s crowd too but doing thier own events as well.

The groups are small enough here that many people are in all of them and see the same people doing most of the work....as always.....the devoted...thankyou Goddess

LUPERCALIA here is getting well known and is a really good conference as well as the LEATHER events etc.
I find the old school people very warm and inviting as well as being
 speed weeders..so they quickly know I am who I say.

Again the is is from LIMITED personal experience and I know that as I volunteer more and help out more I will have more info.




GM




littlewonder -> RE: local BDSM community (11/15/2009 7:49:20 AM)

I really have no interest in munches/parties/dungeons. We will go from time to time but usually only to use the equipment at a dungeon or because we've been invited to a birthday party or something of that nature. But otherwise we pretty much just don't really have any kind of use for all of the public bdsm stuff. It just simply doesn't hold our interest.




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