BitaTruble
Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006 From: Texas Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: YSG I admit, I've had this on my chest for some time and I need to get it off: I know a number of you told Red that I would hurt her. Well congratulations, you were right. However, that doesnt mean that I ment to, that Im a bad person and deserve to be treated as such, or that I escaped unscathed. Though I guess it does make me the asshole in that situation. The reason Im so volitaile and the reason I never heal is because I have nobody there for me. Im alone, and I have been for quite some time. That tends to make a person rot, not just being alone but knowing it too. I never wanted to be like this. I had hoped that I had friends here, someone who would reach out and say "Hey, are you allright? Im willing to listen if you need someone to talk to". It seems that I am a fool too. Dude, we're not mind readers. Sometimes you have to reach out when you're hurting. For the record, I do hope you are all right and what ever has happened (I'm clueless) that it will allow you to learn and grow and, hey, if you fucked up.. welcome to the club. Everyone fucks up. Acknowledging it, working on the flaw that made you fuck up.. those are signs of growth and maturity. You're going to fuck up again.. count on it. Your character and how you feel about yourself will be determined by the actions you take when it happens. If you really believe there are parts of you which are rotten, for fucks sake, get rid of those parts and if you can't do that on your own, try speaking with an objective party, rabbi, priest, therapist, family member, the old fart playing checkers at the barber shop. There is wisdom out there, compassion... but sometimes you have to look for it and stop expecting it to just fall into your lap.
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"Oh, so it's just like Rock, paper, scissors." He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."
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