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RE: improving submission - 12/30/2009 7:17:51 PM

aldompdx

Posts: 538
Joined: 10/24/2004
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Surrender is not a particular set of actions, but an attitude and perspective which reflects one's true nature. Surrender is not learned, as much as one unlearns all the shadow material which impedes the free expression of one's deeper surrendering nature. Surrender is not to another, it is surrendering the false associations or constructs of one's own ego.

Fulfillment / love arises in the only place it is ever felt, one's very own heart. It is neither given nor taken in a bargain of giving to get, but can only be shared. The deepest surrender is of the ego construct that love comes from beyond yourself. With that surrender, one becomes free to share their infinite and ever present love with their partner.

Love yourself, and you inspire that much more love in your partner.

(in reply to toxichearts)

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RE: improving submission - 12/30/2009 8:59:22 PM

Delphinus

Posts: 146
Joined: 11/26/2008
Status: offline

Though I might have been put off by the question, in actuality, I think I "improve my submission" constantly. I do believe that I can strengthen my submissive nature and improve how I act in submission independent of being told to by my Master. I force myself, without his leverage, to make myself as emotionally exposed to him as possible. That could come in different forms:

I could force myself to overcome a flash of humility when I'm put in a position. I'm doing what he's told me to do - the act is being done - but I am improving my submission by accepting it internally as well.

I could force myself to tell him what I think is embarassing, or too deep, or too dark. He would never know I wasn't doing my best to keep myself open to him - it's only me that can decide to dig down deeper than I ever have before to give myself to him.

I could force myself to truly drop everything when, say, he calls me. I could continue folding the laundry or sorting the mail, and he would never know. But I dig a little deeper and stop what I can to give him my full attention, without ever an order to do so.

These are probably fine examples for non-BDSM relationships, as well, I suppose...for the right person. I know far too many women who fight hard to remain so independent, virtuous, and guarded. The submission, for me, is letting that guard completely down and giving up a little bit of that pernicious pride. That is something that I feel he cannot order of you, expect to say it just as he did.

_____________________________

"Silly bitch."

(in reply to toxichearts)

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Post #: 42