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Will this deep burnning ever stop! - 3/23/2006 11:07:06 PM

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Please allow me to explain myself,,, A few months ago I gave my 100 %submission to a Master,,only to have it given back , as he tells me I am not the slave that he wants,, but that I could be. I also found out he was lieing to me. yes I had to lie to him to find out he was lieing to me... I just didnt want it to be true. I had to find out. But 2 wrongs do not make a right. But a few days ago he contacted me and he wants another session with me. This man touched my soul a place no other has ever. I would have done anything for him.When he left me I felt crushed.. I was crushed. I told him NO... that I did not want to get hurt again,,,, but it took all that I had to tell him no. It hurt to tell him no.He told me he holds a key to a place with in me no other will ever open,,,and Iam SOOO scared he is right. How do I get that back,,,, is he right? Dont I have the power to take that key from him.... and if I do why does it hurt so bad. I know my answer to his question MUSt stay as NO... but why does it hurt like this.

SBayouLady

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RE: Will this deep burnning ever stop! - 3/23/2006 11:24:28 PM

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quote:

He told me he holds a key to a place with in me no other will ever open,,,and Iam SOOO scared he is right. How do I get that back,,,, is he right? Dont I have the power to take that key from him.... and if I do why does it hurt so bad. I know my answer to his question MUSt stay as NO... but why does it hurt like this.

It hurts because you're human...as for the 'key', it belongs to you, your perspective creates your own world...if you want the 'key' take responsibility.
C

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"Please, please, please believe me, I really am an asshole. All that Enlightenment and Higher Learning shit was all a ruse."

(in reply to SBayouLady)

RE: Will this deep burnning ever stop! - 3/23/2006 11:32:29 PM

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I just wanted to let you know that I was in the same situation about a year ago and it still hurts......but I go day by day And KNOW that I will one day be happy and find what I seek with out having to settle for less

(in reply to SBayouLady)

RE: Will this deep burnning ever stop! - 3/23/2006 11:33:40 PM

FelinePersuasion

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loosers and manipulators will tell ou anything in the world to keep you right where they want you.

One day someone worth it will come along and open ya heart. don't let him bullshitcha into beliveing other wise

(in reply to CERCKL)

RE: Will this deep burnning ever stop! - 3/23/2006 11:37:04 PM

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From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
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quote:

ORIGINAL: FelinePersuasion

loosers and manipulators will tell ou anything in the world to keep you right where they want you.

One day someone worth it will come along and open ya heart. don't let him bullshitcha into beliveing other wise

Not sure Feline that you really understand what slavery is about or have ever given yourself to another totally as a slave will generally and as a kajira will as part of what she is... You comment probably is ok for the subs you play with but not for a slave.

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Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to FelinePersuasion)

RE: Will this deep burnning ever stop! - 3/23/2006 11:50:03 PM

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Nay, it is possible she may have stepped into the arms of a manipulator, or simply someone for whom the relationship wasn't working. After all, not all slaves/subs and Masters/Doms work out together. The chemistry has to work out the right way. At the same time, that may simply be the reason: it just wasn't meant to be.

The only thing I can suggest is that the OP try to deal with it the same way she would deal with a vanilla break up. Most likely she will find the right Master, it just takes some time.

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RE: Will this deep burnning ever stop! - 3/24/2006 12:01:22 AM

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personally, not enough details to comment. and to suggest something directly to a person based on a generic description of some events is dangerous.

Based on guesswork: lies point to giving in to lust. and a relationship that springs from lust rarely ever goes high; it can become a deep, affectionate friendship.

I would see if you 2 can be friends with no bedroom time. That will tell you better how you feel

(in reply to Slipstreme)

RE: Will this deep burnning ever stop! - 3/24/2006 12:51:19 AM

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Not sure Feline that you really understand what slavery is about or have ever given yourself to another totally as a slave will generally and as a kajira will as part of what she is... You comment probably is ok for the subs you play with but not for a slave.

I agree with IronBear...i list as submissive, but there is ONLY ONE who i will ever be slave too, and its because He reached in, touched and took that part..it is His.

As for you SBayouLady i dont know really what to say...stuck between a rock and hard place?

shycumslutDB

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"We choose our joys and sorrows long before we experience them." -- Kahlil Gibran

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RE: Will this deep burnning ever stop! - 3/24/2006 5:59:28 AM

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This whole situation is unhealthy crap.

You can either give into your bad feelings and make the wrong choice, or not allow your bad feelings to control you and make the good strong choice.

I'll just remind you that healthy relationships really have very little to do with some needy lustful feeling. You've both shown that you're not ready to be in a mature functional relationship yet. But if you both want to enter into a burning building together, that's your choice.

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Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to SBayouLady)

RE: Will this deep burnning ever stop! - 3/24/2006 6:00:20 AM

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it is not easy to ignore a burning belly..............ecspecially when it is the Master that ignited it*smiles fondly and thinks back wistfully*, i have one of those*....

but you have to seriously evalute what is best for you if you are unowned that is your right,to make the best decision possible for your wellbeing.

just b/c he was your first and STILL makes you burn and your soul ache doesn't mean he is the right Master for you.

perhaps you can make a list of the pros and cons with being under him...he is just asking for a 'scene' not you to wear his collar????
so i would be leery....its hard ignoring your belly..............

i can not trust a liar no matter how badly he makes me burn(been there done that too) b/c sooner or later the lies DO affect the service
without trust the dynamic diminishes..........
foundations can not be built on shifting sand.

_____________________________

"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

(in reply to shygirldesires)

RE: Will this deep burnning ever stop! - 3/24/2006 6:20:29 AM

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From: Kentucky
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In a relationship built on trust a 'master' does not lie to his slave.

If he lied to you about one thing, how do you know he's not lying about having the 'key' to your soul?

Sounds like manipulation to me.

Let him continue, or stop him now...I believe the end result will be the same. The only difference is, will it be his choice, or yours?

Good luck to you.

~Christina

(in reply to fyreredsub)

RE: Will this deep burnning ever stop! - 3/24/2006 6:23:59 AM

doves

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i agree with Master IronBear 's comments...

and fyreredsub ..
*it is not easy to ignore a burning belly..............ecspecially when it is the Master that ignited it*

But then neither is a lie easily ignored [as previously said].. Two wrongs don't make a right as was said in the OP.. and how can a relationship be built on trust when it starts of with lies?

< Message edited by doves -- 3/24/2006 6:27:38 AM >

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RE: Will this deep burnning ever stop! - 3/24/2006 6:29:07 AM

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Joined: 4/22/2004
From: Ottawa,ON,Canada
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im in the same situation as you are and ive just had to come to the realization that the yearning and the feelings are gonna fade....but as for him having your key..no one has your key but u...be strong and realize that your happiness in full submission is out there and that the right One will come and dont settle for less cause u think that its more...

(in reply to xxblushesxx)

RE: Will this deep burnning ever stop! - 3/24/2006 6:34:32 AM

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Joined: 1/3/2006
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It sounds as though this "Master" is really a Master Manipulator! Lying to you, releasing you, calling you back again....that's high school stuff. To answer your question, it hurts because you did your best, gave your all and he rejected you. He's not a magician, he holds no power over you anymore unless you allow him to. Be strong, recognize the wonderful qualities within yourself! Just because you are a slave at heart doesn't mean you are weak. Keep talking it out, pour out your grief to your friends....they'll help you through this until your confidence returns and you're able to give your all to a true Man who will treat you the way you deserve!

(in reply to CERCKL)

RE: Will this deep burnning ever stop! - 3/24/2006 6:53:14 AM

crouchingtigress

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From: Maui
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quote:

ORIGINAL: AlliesWorld

It sounds as though this "Master" is really a Master Manipulator! Lying to you, releasing you, calling you back again....that's high school stuff. To answer your question, it hurts because you did your best, gave your all and he rejected you. He's not a magician, he holds no power over you anymore unless you allow him to. Be strong, recognize the wonderful qualities within yourself! Just because you are a slave at heart doesn't mean you are weak. Keep talking it out, pour out your grief to your friends....they'll help you through this until your confidence returns and you're able to give your all to a true Man who will treat you the way you deserve!

I totally agree, studies show the the chemicals that are released in our brain when we are "in love" linger until the negative feelings outweigh the yummy ones.

I think you are so strong to have said No, and I invite you to stay strong in your conviction and focus on that strength, focus on those reasons, don't focus on words that are by definition manipulative and intangible.

No one can ever have a key that you did not yourself give them, and so you can take it back as well.

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RE: Will this deep burnning ever stop! - 3/24/2006 7:00:17 AM

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From: Pennsylvania
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Be strong. Don't let him manipulate you. The best thing you can do is ignore him (if he is still making contact with you). Time heals. There is someone out there who will appreciate what you have to offer.

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RE: Will this deep burnning ever stop! - 3/24/2006 7:51:54 AM

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Joined: 12/16/2005
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When you choose your actions, you also choose your consequences...both good and bad.

Nosce te ipsum...Know Thyself

(in reply to KatyLied)

RE: Will this deep burnning ever stop! - 3/24/2006 8:07:15 AM

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Joined: 9/11/2005
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I agree with everyones posting here and as katylied said "Time heals".... I know it hurts but you deserve to move on now and find someone that loves you and treats you with some respect. Clearly by the way he has treated you he does not have respect for you. I know you say he holds that key but thats only for as long as YOU let him. It hurts, but it passes. Learn from it... put it in the past and move forward to another that deserves you. Best of luck and happiness to you.

(in reply to TigerLily23)

RE: Will this deep burnning ever stop! - 3/24/2006 8:08:29 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SBayouLady

I also found out he was lieing to me. yes I had to lie to him to find out he was lieing to me... I just didnt want it to be true. I had to find out. But 2 wrongs do not make a right. SBayouLady

Put everything aside, you lied, he lied--IMHO, it will happen again--all bets are off when lies are involved--that means there is no trust and no respect--I'd say close it and move on.

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SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor

(in reply to SBayouLady)

RE: Will this deep burnning ever stop! - 3/24/2006 8:09:38 AM

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and to add...
a slave owes it to not only herself to make the wisest decisions possible while without collar, but to her future Master

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"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

(in reply to collaredheart)

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