RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good dominant?

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RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good domi... - 3/25/2006 1:32:24 PM

IrishMist

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/pulls out the remote-controlled blow up doll and passes it to cillydom with a sad smile on my face

I believe this is what you are searching for. From what I have read on your ideas, opinions, and umm, theories...she should serve you very well

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RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good domi... - 3/25/2006 1:34:31 PM

IrishMist

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quote:

and how many submissives want to assume responsibility for their dominant?

define responsibility please?

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RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good domi... - 3/25/2006 1:36:24 PM

Vancouver_cinful

Posts: 1911
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MHOO314

quote:

ORIGINAL: cillydom

And as a male I can tell you thinking is hard work.

I rest My case...martini anyone?

ROFL Since my coffee is now sputtered all over the monitor, yes, I will have one, thanks! Make it cranberry, please.

Cin

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RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good domi... - 3/25/2006 1:38:10 PM

BitaTruble

Posts: 9779
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quote:

I said responsibility

and how many submissives want to assume responsibility for their dominant?

You said responsibility for the relationship, not for the dominant. Now you're changing your words and they reflect a completely different subject in a whole new context.

Celeste

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RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good domi... - 3/25/2006 1:38:35 PM

cillydom

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for his actions and his dominance

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RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good domi... - 3/25/2006 1:39:58 PM

Vancouver_cinful

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quote:

ORIGINAL: cillydom
and how many submissives want to assume responsibility for their dominant?

In any relationship between mature adults both parties take responsibility. For their actions, for the communication...for so many things. A relationship is hard work, and if one party is taking all the responsibility I doubt it's going to last long.

Cin

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RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good domi... - 3/25/2006 1:41:09 PM

twicehappy

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quote:

ORIGINAL: cillydom

Out of curiosity, which is it easier to be a good submissive or a good dominant?
I vote it’s easier to be submissive.

ORIGINAL Vancouver_cinful

quote:

It's always easier to be true to WHO you are...masochist, poly, vanilla, slut...whatever that may be.

I think you absolutely hit the nail on the head.

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RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good domi... - 3/25/2006 1:48:36 PM

cillydom

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ok now, which is more fun?
my vote is the submissive has more fun

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RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good domi... - 3/25/2006 1:53:10 PM

LadyMorgynn

Posts: 800
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From: N. Carolina
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Again, I believe you are looking at it from strictly a BDSM-play point of view. I know of a number of subs who do, in fact, take responsibility for their Dom/me's. I know of one whose Dom has a chronic type injury. She makes sure he has his pills, gets to the doc on time, she gives him massages to help with the pain, etc. Another sub I know lovingly cared for his Mistress all through her lengthy, terminal illness. I know one man who financially supports his Mistress; he is thrilled to be able to provide her with a good lifestyle and know that because of him she does not have to hold a job.

Why don't you try putting some thought into your responses, instead of trotting out silly little off-the-cuff type comebacks that insult the intelligence of most of the subs on this board? Even, try listening to what those same subs are saying. You might learn something.

quote:

ORIGINAL: cillydom

I don’t believe I said work or how much both put into it

I said responsibility

and how many submissives want to assume responsibility for their dominant?

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RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good domi... - 3/25/2006 1:56:41 PM

LadyMorgynn

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Getting too warm in here, so you're changing the subject to take the heat off, hmmm?

Personally, as the Domme, I expect to have a LOT of fun. I also expect my sub to have fun, making me have fun. If he doesn't, he's fired... that is, if he doesn't have fun too. I don't think you can quantify which has more fun, because each one is getting something different out of it, but each one IS having fun, in their own way, or they would not be doing it. What a stupid question, anyway.

quote:

ORIGINAL: cillydom

ok now, which is more fun?
my vote is the submissive has more fun

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RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good domi... - 3/25/2006 1:56:45 PM

Vancouver_cinful

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quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy
ORIGINAL Vancouver_cinful

quote:

It's always easier to be true to WHO you are...masochist, poly, vanilla, slut...whatever that may be.

I think you absolutely hit the nail on the head.

Thank you. I really do think that's the answer.

Cin

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RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good domi... - 3/25/2006 2:04:58 PM

cillydom

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Dum dom iso dummer subbie

I don’t like play parties so much as I don’t enjoy playing with women I don’t know well

and in a m/s relationship the master is the more responsible partner

and this isn’t a put down , but from my observations the dynamics in a mistress/slave relationship are different than a master/slave one.

And being in the lifestyle for many years I’ve seen a few of both and have had 2 long term affairs that lasted over 15 years between them.

And hopefully I’m looking for my last one

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RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good domi... - 3/25/2006 2:10:06 PM

Lordandmaster

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This is a little bit like asking whether it's easier to be a painter or a singer.

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RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good domi... - 3/25/2006 2:30:31 PM

Ariel

Posts: 244
Joined: 7/2/2004
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Hello, I really do not want to step on any toes with being so new to the boards, butt I believe that everyone has their own ideas, and standards, and what they see as what matters to them, I would think that he could post and ask without all the negitive feedback, so maybe he is basing things on play scenes, butt geez, we all have to start somewhere... I honestly thought these borads were more about learning and growth. Not that I, in anyway agree with his ideals, butt as a newbie to the boards, it is rather scary to think that you can not post, and ask what seemed to be a quite innocent question in the beginning, without feeling like you will be jumped all over for it... EEKS...

just My 2 cents

Ariel

< Message edited by Ariel -- 3/25/2006 2:44:19 PM >

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RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good domi... - 3/25/2006 2:47:16 PM

cillydom

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lively aint it?

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RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good domi... - 3/25/2006 2:58:24 PM

MHOO314

Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: cillydom

and this isn’t a put down , but from my observations the dynamics in a mistress/slave relationship are different than a master/slave one.

quote:

And as a male I can tell you thinking is hard work.

Yep I think you've pretty much summed up the difference. Finished blowing up that doll yet?

< Message edited by MHOO314 -- 3/25/2006 3:01:47 PM >

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RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good domi... - 3/25/2006 3:07:41 PM

LadyMorgynn

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Heheheh! I'm with you on that! LOL. Thing is... if he perceives that the Dom has all the work... and the sub has all the fun... why is he doing it? I think it's justification, though, for feeling superior. I heard that from my ex all the time (we've been divorced 20 years). He was a waiter and I was an office manager. Because he was on his feet all day and I sat at a desk all day, HE had more right to feel tired than I did. There was never acknowledgement that both could be equally tired, in different ways.

It's a kind of manipulation tht has no place in the *consentual* BDSM lifestyle. If a Dom *needs* to feel that he has more work and less fun than his sub in order to justify his dominance, I question whether he is, in fact, dominant, or just a guy who has to feel more important in order to get there.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MHOO314

quote:

ORIGINAL: cillydom

and this isn’t a put down , but from my observations the dynamics in a mistress/slave relationship are different than a master/slave one.

quote:

And as a male I can tell you thinking is hard work.

Yep I think you've pretty much summed up the difference. Finished blowing up that doll yet?

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RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good domi... - 3/25/2006 3:15:03 PM

wytchywoman

Posts: 510
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From: Southeastern Michigan
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quote:

ORIGINAL: cillydom

ok now, which is more fun?
my vote is the submissive has more fun

Perhaps I'm being overly simplistic here....but this is my gut response. If you feel the submissive has more fun, and if "fun" is all you want, perhaps you might want to try switching roles for just a bit.

Try on another pair of shoes, in other words.

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Post #: 38

RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good domi... - 3/25/2006 3:20:54 PM

cillydom

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hey! i'm a wimp i cant stand the pain

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RE: is it easier to be a good submissive or a good domi... - 3/25/2006 3:25:19 PM

MHOO314

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quote:

ORIGINAL: cillydom

hey! i'm a wimp i cant stand the pain

Here is a shovel, you're going to need it.

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