Rule
Posts: 10479
Joined: 12/5/2005 Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: pahunkboy How did 200,000 tons of steel disintegrate and drop in 11 seconds? Magically. It was all caused by mnottertail. He found an old Arabic bottle with a djinn in it when he was digging for stone arrow points in an Indian burrow. On the label it said in Aramaic "Free me and I will grant your first wish!" Unfortunately mnottertail could neither read nor understand Aramaic, or else he might have left well enough alone. Instead he supposed that an earlier arrow point digger had left or forgotten the bottle and as it seemed half full and he hoped that the wine might still be drinkable, he broke the wax seal. No wine was in that bottle, though. The fluid started to get turbulent and evaporated. A huge, multicolored cloud escaped from the opened bottle and twisted and whirled and then solidified into a three metre tall djinn. "Mortal!" he cried. "I have promised that I will grant the first wish of anyone who freed me." "That is great," mumbled mnottertail. "I wish for a blond chick to suck my dick." "Two thousand years ago an African chief found my bottle in the great desert and I intended to build him a palace with ten slave girls - but he did not free me." "That was too bad," commisserated mnottertail. "On second thought, I would like ten slave girls to suck my dick." "Twelve hundred years ago a grave robber found my bottle in the grave of the African chief and I intended to build him ten palaces with a hundred slave girls each - but he did not free me either." "Man that must have sucked! If that thief had only known! Say mr. Djinn, I have changed my mind: I would like a hundred slave girls to suck my dick." "He was a homosexual, but never mind, I would have gladly given him as many boys. Unfortunately he got drunk on the beach and a wave snatched my bottle away. For three years I floated in the ocean and then my bottle washed up on another shore where it was found by an indian warrior. At last I would be freed, I hoped, and I intended to build him a hundred palaces with a thousand slave girls each..." "Say, say! A thousand slave girls to suck my dick: that is even better!" said mnottertail enthousiastically. "- but he did not free me either," said the djinn grimly. "Twelve hundred years more my bottle lay in this burrow and during those years I started to hate all humans and I decided to kill the being that would finally free me from my prison!" mnottertail's faced blanched. "But no slave girl has yet sucked my dick!" he objected. "Be reasonable, mr. Djinn: let me find one to suck my dick first." Now it so happened that the djinn was not only angry, but compassionate as well. "Oh, very well. I give you three years to find a slave girl that will suck your dick. As soon as she does, I will flatten the first structure that houses you, killing you. If the three years elapse without you finding such a slave girl, I will do so anyway." Thus it came to pass that mnottertail went for three years without a slave girl sucking his dick, for he did not want to die. Meanwhile he planned to trick the djinn into not killing him. He called his plan "I will trade the world for my life" and built a Japanese paper house in his back garden. This house was at the very core, the center, of his plan: he could not possibly be killed when the djinn brought down that paper structure. mnottertail lived at number six and got a post address number 7 for his Japanese villa, which for short he called his world trade center. He fully intended to spent the appointed day in that villa, preferably with his slave girl to suck his dick. He had owned her for almost a year and all that time he had wanted her to suck his dick, but that could not be. "Tomorrow, though," he told her the evening before, "I will have you suck my dick in the world trade center number seven." Now as it happened, the djinn, whoms name was el Mus'ad, overheard mnottertails announcement and instead of staying around he went about on his own business and the next day at the appointed time, when he perceived that mnottertails dick was being sucked by a slave girl, he by mistake - it was an error! - flattened World Trade Center 7. He much regretted it when he realized his mistake. For the record: el Mus'ad had nothing to do with the collapses of WTC1 and WTC2. He also strongly objects to being called an Arab terrorist. He wasn't even there when he flattened the building; he was in Riad at the time.
< Message edited by Rule -- 2/25/2010 3:10:28 PM >
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