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RE: vanilla life affecting SM - 5/21/2010 12:56:58 PM

lurch999

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddysInkedSlut
One of my doctors once described life as a pond, and situations (like medical issues) are stones being thrown into the pond. When the stone hits it ripples out. Sometimes only a small area of the pond is affected other times the entire pond feels the affect.

Thanks for the reply, i am going to be adding more specifics which may help with the "it depends part". It sounds like you have a really good doctor.

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RE: vanilla life affecting SM - 5/21/2010 1:12:09 PM

leadership527

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Actually, since this thread popped back up I had an entirely alternate viewpoint on this. What I realized is that at least for Carol and I, this entire situation wouldn't really be possible. I own her... that includes her entire life and all the problems in it. I wouldn't be thinking of this in terms of HER life spun out of control and so she was unable to serve ME properly. I'd be thinking, I let my life get out of control and what am I going to do about it? Since I take entire ownership of the whole package, balancing various concerns and resolving various problems are all on my plate. If I wasn't satisfied with how they got balanced out, it'd be my own issue. Carol just needs to obey.

I know my situation doesn't match the OP's.

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~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

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RE: vanilla life affecting SM - 5/21/2010 1:23:01 PM

lurch999

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Sometimes i fail to obey Ma'am, and i would have avoided the biggest of my personal problems if i hadn't. i did however obey Ma'am and go to the dentist after ignoring her "suggestions" for three months.

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RE: vanilla life affecting SM - 5/21/2010 1:25:25 PM

lurch999

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i am hoping to get the two more in sync with each other.

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RE: vanilla life affecting SM - 5/21/2010 1:32:09 PM

lurch999

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You're right, fortunately Ma'am is cool. We started out knowing we had certain fetishes in common, but we also became friends over time. Ma'am is quite mean (and i like that) in the dungeon, but she genuinely cares about me and has proven that with Her actions.

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RE: vanilla life affecting SM - 5/21/2010 1:33:04 PM

LadyPact

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quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527

Actually, since this thread popped back up I had an entirely alternate viewpoint on this. What I realized is that at least for Carol and I, this entire situation wouldn't really be possible. I own her... that includes her entire life and all the problems in it. I wouldn't be thinking of this in terms of HER life spun out of control and so she was unable to serve ME properly. I'd be thinking, I let my life get out of control and what am I going to do about it? Since I take entire ownership of the whole package, balancing various concerns and resolving various problems are all on my plate. If I wasn't satisfied with how they got balanced out, it'd be my own issue. Carol just needs to obey.

I know my situation doesn't match the OP's.

I think that's a very important point. However, I'm seeing it as a difference in the fact that you and Carol have a very committed, long term relationship. There's a huge investment there from both of you. Something that is much better established than something that was only in existence for a few months.

Yes, all relationships have to start somewhere. At the same time, I'd be much more likely to be willing to work through things in a long standing dynamic, rather than one that had less time involved.

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RE: vanilla life affecting SM - 5/21/2010 1:36:33 PM

leadership527

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*laughs* I was thinking EXACTLY of you when I wrote that last line.

But in this case, I wasn't so much thinking of the longevity of it as the totality of it (which, I grant, is probably a function of it's longevity). If you own the whole enchilada, then the kind of distinctions presented in the problem just aren't possible.

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

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RE: vanilla life affecting SM - 5/21/2010 1:38:57 PM

lurch999

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Ma'am whatever's my ass pretty good when i offer it up :D

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RE: vanilla life affecting SM - 5/21/2010 1:41:54 PM

lurch999

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Ma'am has been nice enough to tolerate it thus far.

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RE: vanilla life affecting SM - 5/21/2010 1:43:57 PM

lurch999

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i gave a vague description of what is going on. Plenty of times i have had problems and She has risen to the challenge of helping me.

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RE: vanilla life affecting SM - 5/21/2010 1:56:58 PM

lurch999

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We're not supposed to be play partners, although i make it sound like we are.

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RE: vanilla life affecting SM - 5/21/2010 2:04:24 PM

lurch999

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Ma'am is not a fair weather friend or Domme, and i liked the quote.

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RE: vanilla life affecting SM - 5/21/2010 2:14:16 PM

lurch999

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rules:

Dress code (mostly involving wearing black)
Writing assignments (1-3 a month)
no wanking
remembering to shave and or shower before visiting
wear clean clothes
be tolerant of people who are different
arrive prepared
arrive on time
be respectful
don't interrupt
don't burst into song/dance
do dishes/clean kitchen
keeping pretty panties washed and ready to use
wear any underwear at all
pay attention
do not piss on the toilet seat
put things back where i find them
ask permission before eating food

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RE: vanilla life affecting SM - 5/21/2010 2:22:55 PM

lurch999

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The problems i've had interfering with following these rules include: seasonal depression making it hard to do anything and making me nasty to be around, work upheavals making me constantly paranoid and complainy. The last problem was when the mentally ill unemployed drug user my landlady decided to rent to started threatening to kill me over his toothpaste and i had to find a new place because my landlady sided with him in this matter. Ma'am had told me to move out months before things got to this state because i'd been complaining for months, and i could have avoided this last problem by listening to Her, saving months of negativity and complaining. This guy only became a direct threat in Apri of this year, but having to live around someone that disgusting was making me edgy and depressed the entire time i knew Ma'am.

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RE: vanilla life affecting SM - 5/21/2010 4:27:33 PM

DesFIP

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Sounds like real life to me. And go to the dentist when you start having problems next time. Unaddressed infections in the mouth have been known to cause cardiac problems.

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