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lovingpet -> RE: Role Desires Inquiry/Discussion (5/19/2010 4:00:55 PM)
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Generally speaking, it isn't going to work to have more or less diametrically opposite needs and desires. I don't think everything has to be in common. It is the areas NOT in common that offer the most room for growth and exploration, but there has to be a core of values, traits, needs, and desires that you DO share. How much overlap one needs in a relationship is unique, but there is always some amount necessary for it to be a functional, healthy, and fulfilling relationship.
I will say that my partner and I often agree on the big picture on certain matters, but differ on the details frequently. Sometimes I come to see his perspective and other time he comes to appreciate my position. There is nothing wrong with either. There is also nothing wrong with having to agree to disagree. Once again, though, this is in details and non essentials as a rule. If we were exactly the same and both always completely malleable then it would be one boring and eventually dying relationship. I need a person and not just a role or activity, etc. I need one that challenges me and whom I can engage on different fronts and at different levels. That is the one thing that no one can doubt. The man surely does keep me on my toes...as do I him.
lovingpet
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