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TeeGO -> RE: Male vs Female Dominants...is it just me? (4/11/2006 10:57:57 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: LadyKim
spankmepink11,
It is important to remember that there is a difference when it comes to genders. Females and males find their validation in different things, so there is going to be a difference in how a male dominates vs how a female does. It is also important to remember that men are physically stronger than women, so it takes a different strength (and projection of that that strength) in order for a male to feel he needs to surrender to a female.
It requires understanding the differences in where men and women find their validation in order to understand what is behind the notion of female supremacy. It isn't that men are preceived as being substandard or third world citizens. It is the understanding that men find a great deal of their validation in their sexuality. Females are the keepers of the gene pool throughout all species which means they have the final selection on whom they will breed with in order to pass on the genetics to the next generation. A lioness will actually force her body to miscarry a cub of an alpha lion that has been defeated and kill any young cups sired by that dethroned alpha in order to prevent those genes which are now inferior to someone elses from being passed on to future generations. Her body will also immediately go into heat in order to mate with the new alpha with the superior genetic material. I'm not saying men aren't selective, because they do have their own criteria; however, it is a woman's choice (outside of rape) of who she is going to have sex with. It is in that arena that women have an advantage over men which is part of the cornerstone for female supremacy. It isn't just thinking that one gender is better than the other.
Confidence is something that is required in dominants. Women are more inclined towards being nurturers and seek security and safety. So male dominants are more apt to appeal to those needs when seeking a female submissive; however, male submissives need to know the female dominant is goign to hold them accountable and exert strength over him in a way that is more than physical. It isn't that female dominants are man haters. As a female dominant, I can say I TRULY LOVE those of the male gender. While a female submissive can feel 'taken' by a dominant man because of his physical strength, a male sub needs more of the psychological projection of strength in order to feel taken.
Take the time to read through male profiles. They are seeking a Goddess, Queen, Princess type. These are all authority figures that require the male to do what pleases them or face the consequences. Royals are historically not overly concerned with how their subjects feel about something. (Of course, there are always exceptions to any rule.) The ones that are looking for more of a mother type personality still see the woman as a disciplinary authoritarian. Male submissives need to feel the woman has that authority in order to submit to being put into a position of being helpless. Female submissives know that in general most male doms can secure them even if they put up a struggle.
So, I can't say I agree with your perception of the differences in male and female dominants. I know I am a very nurturing, caring, compassionate person ......... even with a submissive; however, I am also capable of being a taxing and strict sadist when I wish to be. One does not prevent the other.
Bravo, bravo.[sm=applause.gif]
So eloquently put. You've nailed it exactly. Thank you.
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