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input for a new slave :) - 6/16/2010 8:06:16 AM   
zoeypinkk


Posts: 4
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I was told to put under consideration on my profile a few days ago, and since then we have met and it seems we both have a good feeling about this.  Do you think I am over analyzing this by wondering why he isn't asking me to be his Slave, or am I being an idito in going to fast?  I just don't want to put thing on hold with other Masters that seem very nice for someone that could be playing games.

Thanks for reading, and I would love to hear your input :)

< Message edited by zoeypinkk -- 6/16/2010 8:47:03 AM >
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RE: input for a new slave :) - 6/16/2010 8:14:13 AM   
Musicmystery


Posts: 30259
Joined: 3/14/2005
Status: offline
Girls. go. too. fast.

Not everything that happens today is a forever decision. Take time. Get to know him, bit by bit by bit.

You're all ready to settle down, exactly when you should be talking to other men as well.

And already you're overanalyzing and second guessing. Playing games with you? He just met you--once. Let him get to know you first.

Expectations are resentments under construction. Day at time, girl. Day at a time.

Enjoy today.


[edited for usage error]

< Message edited by Musicmystery -- 6/16/2010 8:23:17 AM >

(in reply to zoeypinkk)
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RE: input for a new slave :) - 6/16/2010 8:20:42 AM   
Miyani


Posts: 248
Joined: 12/4/2007
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The thing is, he doesn't know if you'll be a good slave for him yet, just as you don't know if he'll be a good Master for you yet. Think of it as though you'd just met a great vanilla guy - would you be willing to move in with him after one great date? It takes time to get to know a person, to make sure the first impression isn't all you've got to go on. Keep seeing him, keep exploring how well you'll work together as a couple, and go from there.

But if you don't feel right putting things on hold with others yet, tell him that. "I really like you, and I'd love to see where this is going, but it's a bit too early to be 'under consideration,' for me. Let's just keep doing what we're doing, and see where it goes."

His reaction to that will also give you some of the information you need to make your choice about him.

< Message edited by Miyani -- 6/16/2010 8:21:16 AM >

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RE: input for a new slave :) - 6/16/2010 8:23:56 AM   
Toppingfrmbottom


Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
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I don't think any one worth their salt would ask someone they just met to be their slave. Being a Master is a lot of hard work and disipline, and it should be taken way more seriously then hay I liked you now be my slave. Becoming someone's slave should take time, and all parties involved should know each other very well, or moderately well.

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RE: input for a new slave :) - 6/16/2010 8:26:47 AM   
PrimalConsonance


Posts: 463
Joined: 7/11/2009
From: Southern New Jersey
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quote:

ORIGINAL: zoeypinkk

I had a wonderful talk with a Sir the other day and we hit it out of the ballpark, although I did not see his picture I decided to meet him yesterday afternoon.  I could not of asked for anything better, I was intrigued with the Sir, after talking in person about what I want and what he wants to give to his slave he asked if I wanted to play.  I told him I wanted to be told.  So the story goes like this we found a spot and he gave me a taste of what he likes best.  Granted there was no sex and it was in a sweet manner.  So here's my question, I was told to put under consideration a few days ago when we started talking, since we met yesterday I got an email back saying "I was very happy with the meeting as well. you did a great job and you seem like someone that I could definitely get to
like :)...I hope W/we can talk sometime soon. My day is going to be nuts today, but I will try to check messages a few
times...."       Do you think I am over analyzing this by wondering why he isn't asking me to be his Slave, or am I being an idiot in going to fast?   I just don't want to put things on hold with other Masters that seem very nice for someone that could be playing games with me. 

Thanks for reading, and I would love to hear your input :)


Have you heard of NRE?  It's called:  New Relationship Energy.  When two people are just getting started out, that burst of "I want to do everything, all the time, as much as I can" and such, is what experienced.  Now if you get ahead of yourself and the other person isn't in that state yet, well....that's something different.  I'm sure you are there, but it sounds like this Dom isn't, and your high expectations are getting ahead of what's happened so far.  Take it easy and don't invest so much so soon into something that hasn't gathered form yet into a real relationship.  Good luck and also welcome to the boards!


_____________________________

AKA: CNJDom (types in black) and roselaure (types in Red)


Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss


(in reply to zoeypinkk)
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RE: input for a new slave :) - 6/16/2010 8:27:42 AM   
CarrieO


Posts: 2432
Joined: 1/27/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: zoeypinkk

So here's my question, I was told to put under consideration a few days ago when we started talking, since we met yesterday I got an email back saying "I was very happy with the meeting as well. you did a great job and you seem like someone that I could definitely get to
like :)...I hope W/we can talk sometime soon. My day is going to be nuts today, but I will try to check messages a few
times...."       Do you think I am over analyzing this by wondering why he isn't asking me to be his Slave, or am I being an idiot in going to fast?   I just don't want to put things on hold with other Masters that seem very nice for someone that could be playing games with me. 


OP,

You joined 6 days ago and you feel you're ready to "consider" a man as your M that you met yesterday?

Why?   Are you considering him?  Have you put him under consideration?

You don't really know him...he doesn't really know you....why the rush?


_____________________________

"No matter what happens in the kitchen, never apologize"~Julia Child~


(in reply to zoeypinkk)
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RE: input for a new slave :) - 6/16/2010 8:31:39 AM   
zoeypinkk


Posts: 4
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Thank you all for you input you are right I am thinking way to much.  I guess I did get that "NRE", I did rejoin 6 days ago but I have been on the site before. 

Hope this post can help someone else that is wondering the same thing.  :) 


(in reply to CarrieO)
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RE: input for a new slave :) - 6/16/2010 8:32:34 AM   
dwedeking


Posts: 13
Joined: 6/28/2009
Status: offline
An alternative lifestyle relationship is no different than one in a vanillla lifestyle, in that it takes time to build. You have to go through the same things. Sometimes the sex/scene of it all is super exciting but the day to day is what makes or breaks a relationship. You still have to learn about all those little things that people do during the day to day life and find out if you can stand that or not. I don't care how young you are, or how much help you have from medicine, at some point you have to stop having sex and actually be with the person. The most in-depth 24/7 tpe relationship that I was in (and it last 10 years) we dated for 6 months, she lived with me for another year, and then we were married (after which I put a collar on that was worn in the bedroom) and it was another 2 years until we had a silver permanent collar made and it become more of a slave/Master type relationship.

< Message edited by dwedeking -- 6/16/2010 8:33:42 AM >

(in reply to Toppingfrmbottom)
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RE: input for a new slave :) - 6/16/2010 8:33:07 AM   
zoeypinkk


Posts: 4
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Miyani



"But if you don't feel right putting things on hold with others yet, tell him that. "I really like you, and I'd love to see where this is going, but it's a bit too early to be 'under consideration,' for me. Let's just keep doing what we're doing, and see where it goes."

His reaction to that will also give you some of the information you need to make your choice about him.


This is an excellent Idea, thank you :)

(in reply to Miyani)
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RE: input for a new slave :) - 6/16/2010 8:35:30 AM   
lally2


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Joined: 4/16/2009
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you met yesterday! - jeeze, slow down, what on earth is youre hurry.  to the other guys you like the look of be honest and tell them the situation, theyll understand and if they dont, no loss.

you like this guy, he likes you - see where it goes.  he's explained that he's busy today, so let it ride and stop thinking youre missing out on something better - thats really a bit naff.  does he read these boards at all?

_____________________________

So all I have to do in order to serve him, is to work out exactly how improbable he is, feed that figure into the finite improbability generator, give him a fresh cup of really hot tea ... and turn him on!

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RE: input for a new slave :) - 6/16/2010 9:41:49 AM   
EclipseAbove


Posts: 220
Joined: 8/11/2005
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I see things like this all the time. The funny ones (I have a sick sense of humor) are the stories about seeing a profile, emailing once or twice, and moving across the country to live with the other person. Within days there is a forum post about how it didn't work out. Go figure.

To the OP - Think of consideration like engagement and collaring like marriage - the levels of commitment are about the same (or at least should be). Would you even be thinking about that kind of stuff at your stage in the relationship if it were vanilla?

(in reply to lally2)
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RE: input for a new slave :) - 6/16/2010 1:23:25 PM   
alethia


Posts: 1
Joined: 5/20/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: EclipseAbove

I see things like this all the time. The funny ones (I have a sick sense of humor) are the stories about seeing a profile, emailing once or twice, and moving across the country to live with the other person. Within days there is a forum post about how it didn't work out. Go figure.

To the OP - Think of consideration like engagement and collaring like marriage - the levels of commitment are about the same (or at least should be). Would you even be thinking about that kind of stuff at your stage in the relationship if it were vanilla?


I never thought of it this way, thank you so much for making a point of stating it. :)

(in reply to EclipseAbove)
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RE: input for a new slave :) - 6/16/2010 1:43:37 PM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: EclipseAbove
To the OP - Think of consideration like engagement and collaring like marriage - the levels of commitment are about the same (or at least should be). Would you even be thinking about that kind of stuff at your stage in the relationship if it were vanilla?

Well, I don't precisely agree with this statement. It is not my place to tell someone else what levels of commitment are good and appropriate for them. If someone wants to have an endless series of two week long master/slave relationships who am I to say that's bad? What I can say is that this relationship pattern would not work for me. I can say that in two weeks it would not be possible to reach the levels of trust I require to think of something as M/s. I can say that to me, such a thing sounds more like a "rental" than ownership. I can say that in general, that sort of relationship pattern does not work out for most people. But what I cannot say is whether it will work out for the OP.

For ME personally, I agree with you. But if someone else is into the whole shallow, casual thing and it works for them, then I'm all for it for them.

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to EclipseAbove)
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RE: input for a new slave :) - 6/16/2010 3:40:27 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline
What's your hurry??

Take your time and get to know him as a person, not as a dom and let him get to know you as a person, not a sub/slave.

Meet each other, talk to one another, go out on dates..remember the good ole days????

(in reply to leadership527)
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RE: input for a new slave :) - 6/16/2010 7:32:42 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14412
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: zoeypinkk

wondering why he isn't asking me to be his Slave, or am I being an idito in going to fast? 
That's like asking "Why hasn't he asked me to marry him?" after the first date.

And for what it's worth, I disagree with putting "Under consideration" in your profile unless he is doing the same in his.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to zoeypinkk)
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RE: input for a new slave :) - 6/16/2010 7:58:42 PM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: zoeypinkk

I was told to put under consideration on my profile a few days ago, and since then we have met and it seems we both have a good feeling about this.  Do you think I am over analyzing this by wondering why he isn't asking me to be his Slave, or am I being an idito in going to fast?  I just don't want to put thing on hold with other Masters that seem very nice for someone that could be playing games.

Thanks for reading, and I would love to hear your input :)


I see it like this zoey lass, I have met on line and see daily ladies who I would bust a ball to have in a collar, yet without me travelling to spend time with them and taking my wife too, how in the hell can we know if the person on the screen matches the image we have in our minds. Even after one meet I wouldn't countanance a collar or anything that a getting to know you period and would want her to explore the other opportunities she may have so she would know what it is she wanted. Even after being given a Probationary Collar, it is unlikely she would be 24/7 until we were all surer and the full collar was offered. OK I'm talking slaves here and not subs but the principle is the same. I want that person to get bto knowe us and see the good, bad and ugly (usually me when I arise at some hour before 6am or before I have a shower and my three obligatory coffees in the morning. I want to see her without make uo and in a bad molod or suffering from PMT (so I can evaluate the level of body armour to issue the family inc. the dogs....)

Be smart lass. Be very smart and take it slow. Explore your options. Some one who wants you in a collar of consideration so fast probable is preying on your inexperience because he can't get an experienced sub so I see red flags here straight off.


_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to zoeypinkk)
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RE: input for a new slave :) - 6/16/2010 8:09:08 PM   
Glasgow


Posts: 248
Joined: 6/7/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: zoeypinkk

I was told to put under consideration on my profile a few days ago, and since then we have met and it seems we both have a good feeling about this.  Do you think I am over analyzing this by wondering why he isn't asking me to be his Slave, or am I being an idito in going to fast?  I just don't want to put thing on hold with other Masters that seem very nice for someone that could be playing games.

Thanks for reading, and I would love to hear your input :)


1. Imagine that 'under consideration' is a giant stick. Now imagine that that stick is wedged far, far up everyone's ass here. People hate that term like my dog hates a living squirrel. I think it's valid, but expect teh trolls of doom to eat your face off for mentioning it.

2. Don't rush. Open up communication and know exactly what you're getting into. The more time you spend as friends before becoming enslaved, the better.


_____________________________

I wash my hands of this weirdness.

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RE: input for a new slave :) - 6/17/2010 10:29:09 AM   
lally2


Posts: 2621
Joined: 4/16/2009
Status: offline
sorry,. changed my mind

< Message edited by lally2 -- 6/17/2010 10:43:20 AM >


_____________________________

So all I have to do in order to serve him, is to work out exactly how improbable he is, feed that figure into the finite improbability generator, give him a fresh cup of really hot tea ... and turn him on!

(in reply to Glasgow)
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RE: input for a new slave :) - 6/18/2010 7:07:00 AM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline
ATTENTION PLEASE:

... the trolls of doom...

are now being called

The wise women of reality.

Kindly note the change.

Thank you.

The Management.

(to the OP.... you have been given good advice, and you seem to be taking it in stride. Please let us know how things go)


_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to lally2)
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RE: input for a new slave :) - 6/19/2010 3:28:13 AM   
MasterGreg43


Posts: 79
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Fla, Ga, NY, NJ, MD, VA, now PA
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zoeypinkk a good Master would study, check background of experience, get to know a person as just that before after one meeting make u his/her slave, this is why this site is not the best place to find a good slave because of so many Tops misguide newbies, or slave/subs in wrong direction.

something I have been telling slave over 10 yrs, just as much as a Dom look for a slave and background on such, the slave need to ask around about same Master to know past relationships bad or good, how long in lifestyle, their is a difference between bedroom Doms, and a Dominant that know how to take full control of a slave not just how to fuck a slave with kinky, little bit of rope.

patience is the hard lesson learned dealing with a Master indeed, take ur time do as ur Master as if it make u feel good to please him then he will make u feel good to allow such relationship and sooner or later it will grow to new levels.

_____________________________

Master Greg
PA Dominant King
Dominant King of Sweet Palace of Pain
Master of Sweet House of Pleasure & Pain

(in reply to zoeypinkk)
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