Problem with peeing

Problem with peeing (Full Version)

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EveEveEve -> Problem with peeing (6/22/2010 8:35:58 AM)
I am new to here but I have a big problem with peeing because I had 3 children and also my ex used to use dildos and fisiting. I am going to see my gyn this week but I wonder what to ask him? I pee if I run or jump and with sex, my ex hated it and part of why we got divorce, he also said I got too loose. I already tried keggels but that didn't seem like it work at all. Can you help me? Does anyone know about this? Can they sew you up and make you tight again, is that true? Can that be covered by insurance? Probably not. Sorry with all the quesions but I really need some help because I want to meet somebody again. Maybe some people like it peeing, but I do not. Thank you! Eve

January -> RE: Problem with peeing (6/22/2010 8:43:44 AM)
Hi Eve, Insurance should cover this problem. Just telling the doctor you've had three kids should be enough. I was going to suggest Kegels, too. How long have you been doing them? How long ago did you have your last child? By the way: Your ex sounds awful! He throws you to the curb because you were injured having his children? January

EveEveEve -> RE: Problem with peeing (6/22/2010 9:01:21 AM)
My doctor told me to try keggels a year ago and said it would fix it and I really did do just exactly what he said but I didn't see any difference at all. Everyone says it should work but it didn't, I don't know why. I stopped after about 6 months because it just seemed useless. My children are 16, 14 and 12. I don't think I was injured having them, but I don't know. I used to just wear a pad for the peeing and that took care of it, but it just keept getting more and now it's all the time. Most of the time just a little bit but sometimes a lot more. My husband only started complaining about me being loose the last 2 or 3 years we were married but I think he was cheating on me then because he left me for a very young girl, but haha!!!!!!! she got pregnant and he was going to marry here and he was bragging about it all over the place but when it came out it was not his baby! so he got it in the end and good riddanse! But I was with someone else and he said I was lose a bit too, so I hope my gyn can fix this! Some men like peeing but I don't like it. Thank you for being so nice! , Eve.

laurell3 -> RE: Problem with peeing (6/22/2010 9:03:14 AM)
There are a number of things that can cause bladder issues. Ask your doctor. With regard to "peeing during sex" are you positive it's actually urine?

angelikaJ -> RE: Problem with peeing (6/22/2010 9:16:50 AM)
There are actually weighted objects that many women find helpful to use in excercising their kegels as they provide you with resistance. Did your doctor suggest something like that?

windchymes -> RE: Problem with peeing (6/22/2010 10:07:27 AM)
Eve, just tell your doctor what you told us here. You can edit out the fisting and dildoes part if you want, because he or she will get the gist. "Stress Incontinence" is a very common problem with women after child-bearing. It means your muscles have gotten weak, and your bladder has probably lost a lot of its support from the internal muscles and ligaments that hold it in place. Insurance should cover any diagnostic testing and treatment. It might involve surgery, unfortunately, but only the doctor can tell you for sure. I question you returning to the doctor who told you kegels "will" take care of it. If your pelvic floor muscles are so weakened that you're wetting pads all the time, as you say, then all the kegels in the world are not going to take care of the problem. Make sure you let the doc know how bad the problem is. It sounds as though it's gone way beyond a little leaking when you sneeze or cough. Good luck! :)

peppermint -> RE: Problem with peeing (6/22/2010 10:23:47 AM)
I wore pads for years due to wetting myself. It was horrible when I was ill with heavy coughing. The doctor couldn't, or wouldn't do anything for it. Apparently if your bladder has fallen they can go in and surgically put it back into place. What helped for me was getting my COPD under control. With less coughing I have fewer accidents. Now I only have leakage when I am sick or when I have a really bad coughing spell. I did a lot or research on the internet about incontinence. From what I read it is unnecessary and can be fixed. However, the doctors don't seem to take it seriously. I was told that I was in my 40s, had 3 children, and I needed to get used to it. As with you, kegels seemed to do little. I did them faithfully for 2 years with no results at all. I think it's a matter of finding the right doctor who does give a shit about quality of life. A woman in her 40s or 50s shouldn't be doomed to wearing pads and diapers for the rest of her life just because she had children.

tazzygirl -> RE: Problem with peeing (6/22/2010 10:27:08 AM)
My suggestion, Eve, if you dont get the answers you deserve from your GYN, find an Urologist. A female Gyn is usually more sympathetic to these problems, but not always. A bladder tack isnt uncommon at all.

January -> RE: Problem with peeing (6/22/2010 12:26:12 PM)
Eve, Thanks for replying! To be sure, doing Kegels now doesn't make much sense if you had your last baby 12 years ago. I hope you'll continue to post... there are some very wise and compassionate women on this board. (Good men, too. But they generally don't know nuttin' 'bout Kegels.) I think tazzy's advice to see a urologist (if the GYN is unsympathetic) is wonderful. I wish I'd thought of it! January

BossyShoeBitch -> RE: Problem with peeing (6/22/2010 1:28:42 PM)
You are in very good company by the way. It's called being a mother! Many women who give birth vaginally have the same issue. Without going into the messy details, I'll tell you that when I first gave birth, I had urinary incontinence for a couple of weeks. These days when I sneeze you're likely to hear, "AH CHOO!... OH SHIT!" You need a UroGynocologist. Try this website. They have very good information and it's a good stepping stone. www.zipperurogyn.com

LafayetteLady -> RE: Problem with peeing (6/22/2010 2:08:34 PM)
First, please please PLEASE stop feeling like there is something wrong with you. Maybe the men who said you were loose were just suffering from small penises. In any case, it is a rude thing to say. As BossyShoeBitch said, what you need is a Uro/Gyn. I suffered this for years after my son, and it only got worse. I had it fixed two years ago, and if it wasn't for the fact that I then seriously injured my back, I would be running and jumping all over the place! The doctor found it odd when I told him that I was excited when I vomited and didn't pee all over the floor. But believe me, it was such a great thing. Even though I hardly ever vomit, it was still nice to not wet myself in the process. Vaginal tightening is an aesthetic procedure and not likely covered by insurance, however, you could have a prolapsed uterus as well that is causing that, in which case the corrective procedure would be covered. Bottom line, get thee to a doctor right away and inquire about a pelvic sling for urinary incontinence. I notice you are only 69 miles from me, and there is a great one at Morristown Memorial Hospital here in NJ. Cmail me on the other side and I will happily give you his name.

kiwisub12 -> RE: Problem with peeing (6/22/2010 2:20:07 PM)
I work in urology surgery, and it is very common for women to have stress urinary incontinence - and not just women who have had kids. Gravity isn't your friend. The easiest fix is a mesh sling that supports your urethra, and changes the angle of the bladder neck. If you have more of a pelvic prolapse then you can have it repaired - again with mesh. Its more of a surgery , but would fix the problem. Because of who i work with, i would suggest you see a urologist, and don't bother mentioning the fisting and dildos. It isn't germane to the subject, and would just embarrass you - i think. As for the size of your vagina - talk to your ob-gyn. They may be able to fix it. Mine refused . And now, unless the guy is big, i can't feel him. Sucks to be a woman sometimes.

bemyslut -> RE: Problem with peeing (6/22/2010 2:27:30 PM)
you have a classic case of Stress Urinary Incontinence. It is a very common condition; the good news is that it can be treated. Your physician will most likely order a series of tests (urodynamics) that involves filling your bladder with saline and then having you perform a series of Valsalva maneuvers (coughing, bearing down as if constipated, etc) and register at what pressure the leaks occur. Depending on the severity of the incontinence, you will be given a number of treatment options. As a physician, I have participated in numerous surgeries designed to alleviate this very problem. Performing a transobturator sling does involve surgery, but the you will be pleased with the outcome. It is not necessary to divulge any information regarding your private sexual life; however, it would behoove you to inform the physician that you experience incontinence during sexual intercourse--as this will help him assess the severity of the disease. If you elect to have it surgically corrected, you will have approximately a 6 week recovery period. At least your days of incontinence will end!!

LafayetteLady -> RE: Problem with peeing (6/22/2010 2:32:01 PM)
My recovery for the sling was only about 2 weeks. As I mentioned, I'm am VERY happy with the results. As for the urodynamics, you might find those tests to be a little embarassing. I've been poked and prodded by so many doctors over the years, it didn't bother me that much. Although I think the doctor was a little shocked when he had me in the "birthing" position and asked me to cough, to which I responded "You sure you want to stand that close?"

sweetsub1957 -> RE: Problem with peeing (6/22/2010 2:56:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kiwisub12 I work in urology surgery, and it is very common for women to have stress urinary incontinence - and not just women who have had kids. Gravity isn't your friend. The easiest fix is a mesh sling that supports your urethra, and changes the angle of the bladder neck. If you have more of a pelvic prolapse then you can have it repaired - again with mesh. Its more of a surgery , but would fix the problem. i had a urologist fix me up w/ a mesh sling. It's fantastic! Works like a charm! And the recovery is not all that bad. As for the girlie parts, Kegels didn't work for me either. Also, yes, they can take tucks and make it tighter. Both my kids were over 9 pounds and i had tucks taken when i had my hysterectomy. Again, it works like a charm & it's better than ever! [:D] ~sweetsub~ edited for wording

peppermint -> RE: Problem with peeing (6/22/2010 3:36:07 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: EveEveEve I pee if I run or jump and with sex, my ex hated it and part of why we got divorce, he also said I got too loose. Funny about older men. They will blame the woman for not being tight any more, as if it is all the woman's fault. In reality, many of these complaining men are having ED problems. They can't get it to the size it used to be, it's not as hard as it used to be, and they have problems sustaining the erection. They refuse to admit that age is catching up with them and blame the woman. To prove their point when they do find a younger sex partner they seem to perform as they did when they were younger. They forget that new partner thrill that passes goes away after a short time.

kiwisub12 -> RE: Problem with peeing (6/22/2010 5:10:07 PM)
When i had my sling, i was good to go in three days - and since i had taken two weeks sick leave - i had a nice vacation. A nice DRY vacation. And when i had my cystoscope in the office and the doctor asked me to cough - well, lets just say that the next time i saw him he was in scrubs. [:D] As for the husband complaining that i was not longer "tight" - he didn't appreciate me when i told him that he was wearing away!!!!!!!

DesFIP -> RE: Problem with peeing (6/22/2010 5:10:59 PM)
Kegels are not always a cure. It is very common to need surgery to help support the bladder neck. Your doctor's an idiot if he assumed it would cure it. Ask for a referral to a urologist who specializes in incontinence.

CynthiaWVirginia -> RE: Problem with peeing (6/23/2010 12:16:04 AM)
~~~~~~~~~~~~fast reply~~~~~~~~~~~ I really needed to read this, as some posts made my day. I laughed so hard I almost cried...catharsis, I think. I was seven years old and kept having problems with labial fusion, and had to go back to our family doctor uncountable times to get cut open because our insurance wouldn't cover a specialist. Anyway, the vision of these...er...washed it all away. [:D] quote: Although I think the doctor was a little shocked when he had me in the "birthing" position and asked me to cough, to which I responded "You sure you want to stand that close?" quote: And when i had my cystoscope in the office and the doctor asked me to cough - well, lets just say that the next time i saw him he was in scrubs. [:D] Mom has a leakage problem and the exercizes and meds aren't helping. A job she used to have (INS, when she was between the ages of 58-65) used to make her lift heavy boxes of files. The weight was so bad that it tore her shoulder up really bad. I wonder now about uterine prolapse, as I heard that women could also get that from heavy lifting. I'll check to see about this soon, how much her insurance would cover.

EveEveEve -> RE: Problem with peeing (6/23/2010 12:18:57 PM)
Thank you everybody for all of your ideas. I am reading everything and I will tell my doctor what you said and also ask about the things you suggested. I have been really embarrased by this for a long time and this is a new doctor, he is suppose to be a speciallist for this and women my age so I think it will work out pretty good with your advise. I will let you know what happens when I see him, it's next week. You are all very nice and friendly! I feel like I have new friends now, even if I don't meet a boyfriend on here. A lot of guys have wrote to me in a short time, but most of there letters are to short. There is only one or two that I might write back when I get ready. Thank you very much! Eve

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