Do you enjoy being a submissive?

Do you enjoy being a submissive? (Full Version)

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submissivemale22 -> Do you enjoy being a submissive? (6/24/2010 8:06:52 PM)
Mind you this is a bit more complex of a query than it may seem. Obviously we all enjoy being submissive to the extent that we receive gratification from interacting with dommes. However, if given the option to be equally fulfilled by vanilla relationships instead, would you take it?

littlewonder -> RE: Do you enjoy being a submissive? (6/24/2010 8:12:51 PM)
I don't see relationships as "vanilla" or anything else. I simply get involved with men who I am attracted to. I've never been attracted to submissve personality men, only dominant men...whether they've heard of bdsm or not. I am fulfilled either way. It's not about kink for me. It's about the personality of the man I'm with.

submissivemale22 -> RE: Do you enjoy being a submissive? (6/24/2010 8:20:38 PM)
apparently you can't edit the original post... i have tried to clarify what i was asking in this thread: http://www.collarchat.com/m_3276652/tm.htm please join us.

ThatDamnedPanda -> RE: Do you enjoy being a submissive? (6/24/2010 8:23:00 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: submissivemale22 However, if given the option to be equally fulfilled by vanilla relationships instead, would you take it? Yes. Absolutely. No question about it. I would give quite a lot for that to be possible.

dreamerdreaming -> RE: Do you enjoy being a submissive? (6/24/2010 8:24:04 PM)
OP, that's like asking whether or not I'd choose to be someone else, if I had the option. No, I wouldn't. I LOVE being myself! [:)]

laurell3 -> RE: Do you enjoy being a submissive? (6/24/2010 8:24:11 PM)
I am equally fulfilled by vanilla relationships. Your presumption that we have to be either kinky OR vanilla is erroneous. I am both and neither and I am fulfilled because I love the person I am with for who they are.

submissivemale22 -> RE: Do you enjoy being a submissive? (6/24/2010 8:26:46 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: laurell3 I am equally fulfilled by vanilla relationships. Your presumption that we have to be either kinky OR vanilla is erroneous. I am both and neither and I am fulfilled because I love the person I am with for who they are. awesome for you. im not presuming anything on a universal basis. many people (and i would venture to say the majority of this sites users) don't share your balance.

Missokyst -> RE: Do you enjoy being a submissive? (6/24/2010 8:28:41 PM)
I disagree. I don't see relationships as nilla or bdsm. Personality-wise, I am always attracted to men who are dominantly wired. Kink is play. Dominant is personality. I am perfectly happy in a relationship, even when the ds has dwindled. If my mate became ill or otherwise did not want to engage in bdsm I would still enjoy being in the relationship because I am with him, the person, the man. I would have gone completely non bdsm-less nilla had my x asked. It isn't the kink, it is the relationship that fulfills me.

FlamingRedhead -> RE: Do you enjoy being a submissive? (6/24/2010 8:29:39 PM)
I enjoy being able to be myself. It's such a relief being with someone who not only understands me but fulfills a lot of my deep-seated needs like no one else ever has. That being said, there are some needs he won't ever meet. I have wished sometimes that I was "normal" because I've met a couple of really nice guys who would probably be inclined to have a serious relationship with me, if I was interested, but they don't have "it." They're about as vanilla as you can get, and I can feel nothing for them but friendship. Whichever way I choose to live, it seems I won't be able to have everything I want, so for now, I choose to do what makes me happiest and try not to worry about what I might be missing out on.

laurell3 -> RE: Do you enjoy being a submissive? (6/24/2010 8:31:27 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: submissivemale22 quote: ORIGINAL: laurell3 I am equally fulfilled by vanilla relationships. Your presumption that we have to be either kinky OR vanilla is erroneous. I am both and neither and I am fulfilled because I love the person I am with for who they are. awesome for you. im not presuming anything on a universal basis. many people (and i would venture to say the majority of this sites users) don't share your balance. and this is relevant to your question how? You have three posters disagreeing with that, it might be that your unfounded presumption just isn't correct, maybe?

submissivemale22 -> RE: Do you enjoy being a submissive? (6/24/2010 8:31:52 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Missokyst I disagree. I don't see relationships as nilla or bdsm. Personality-wise, I am always attracted to men who are dominantly wired. Kink is play. Dominant is personality. I am perfectly happy in a relationship, even when the ds has dwindled. If my mate became ill or otherwise did not want to engage in bdsm I would still enjoy being in the relationship because I am with him, the person, the man. I would have gone completely non bdsm-less nilla had my x asked. It isn't the kink, it is the relationship that fulfills me. perhaps i should have qualified my comments better: im posing this specifically to people who do see relationships "as nilla or bdsm"

submissivemale22 -> RE: Do you enjoy being a submissive? (6/24/2010 8:33:18 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: laurell3 quote: ORIGINAL: submissivemale22 quote: ORIGINAL: laurell3 I am equally fulfilled by vanilla relationships. Your presumption that we have to be either kinky OR vanilla is erroneous. I am both and neither and I am fulfilled because I love the person I am with for who they are. awesome for you. im not presuming anything on a universal basis. many people (and i would venture to say the majority of this sites users) don't share your balance. and this is relevant to your question how? You have three posters disagreeing with that, it might be that your unfounded presumption just isn't correct, maybe? its relevant to my question, because those are the opinions i am seeking.

laurell3 -> RE: Do you enjoy being a submissive? (6/24/2010 8:34:49 PM)
People answer the question that you asked, not the one you wanted to.

submissivemale22 -> RE: Do you enjoy being a submissive? (6/24/2010 8:38:22 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: laurell3 People answer the question that you asked, not the one you wanted to. not really. my question (which stands unedited) was, "...if given the option to be equally fulfilled by vanilla relationships instead, would you take it?" I apologize for not being clearer- and thank the people who already replied for their participation- but i thought it followed that i was seeking the opinion of those incapable of being equally fulfilled.

marie2 -> RE: Do you enjoy being a submissive? (6/24/2010 8:44:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: submissivemale22 quote: ORIGINAL: laurell3 People answer the question that you asked, not the one you wanted to. , "...if given the option to be equally fulfilled by vanilla relationships instead, would you take it?" If by vanilla you mean a relationship that doesn't have a ds dynamic, I would have to say no, because I do not think it would be as fulfilling to me.

peppermint -> RE: Do you enjoy being a submissive? (6/24/2010 8:46:32 PM)
Nope, no vanilla for me. I had to wait years before becoming involved in the BDSM community. Now that I'm here I am NOT going back.

submissivemale22 -> RE: Do you enjoy being a submissive? (6/24/2010 8:47:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: marie2 quote: ORIGINAL: submissivemale22 quote: ORIGINAL: laurell3 People answer the question that you asked, not the one you wanted to. , "...if given the option to be equally fulfilled by vanilla relationships instead, would you take it?" If by vanilla you mean a relationship that doesn't have a ds dynamic, I would have to say no, because I do not think it would be as fulfilling to me. marie.... you are killing me. that disregards my entire hypothetical.

submissivemale22 -> RE: Do you enjoy being a submissive? (6/24/2010 8:48:50 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: peppermint Nope, no vanilla for me. I had to wait years before becoming involved in the BDSM community. Now that I'm here I am NOT going back. erghhhhh... ok, clearly i got a little lazy and authored way too ambiguous of an original post. i think i might have to start this one over with a new thread from the top.

chamberqueen -> RE: Do you enjoy being a submissive? (6/24/2010 8:48:54 PM)
I feel that I was "called" to be a slave. I have never felt more fulfilled. I have grown emotionally, feel in balance, and I never could have done that so quickly or so well in a vanilla relationship. For me there is a huge difference between BDSM and vanilla, though for others there is not. I understand your question completely. Each person will have their own answer, but I know that if I were to ever walk away from the lifestyle I would no longer be true to myself. The one exception I see to this were if anything were ever to happen to my Master. After the wonders of our journey I don't know if I could be a slave to someone else or not. It is my hope that I go first so that I never have to worry about that.

submissivemale22 -> RE: Do you enjoy being a submissive? (6/24/2010 8:50:01 PM)
lol, seriously.... are you guys fucking with me? is this like an inside joke? is anyone even reading the question at this point?

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