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RE: The Image that is Given - 6/29/2010 8:09:54 AM

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~ Fast Confirmation ~

Reading this thread may not have settled or even clarified the common usage of "image" or "in-crowd" or "clique", all of which are usually applied in the 3rd person as not so subtle accusations; but it did confirm one of my fundamental beliefs. You don't know, and should not have an image of anyone until you get off the computer and meet them in person. It is as true when you're looking for a social acquaintance, as it is a partner.

I don't think an "image" is given as much as it is taken, especially from an on-line representation. I do think, under that circumstance, it is more often taken wrong than it is right. Not a problem unless/until either the image, or the 'image' take that image seriously and start to believe it as reality. However when that happens they still serve a purpose. They make wonderful ToA's for an on-line sadist.

(in reply to RCdc)

RE: The Image that is Given - 6/29/2010 8:10:54 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: WinsomeDefiance

quote:

ORIGINAL: RCdc

Personally, I always find the claim that 'I've had lots of people emailing me privately to tell me how great I am and how everyone else sucks' to be pretty lame.

I always shake my head when people post about how all these others post behind the scenes to support them, because their supporters are too scared to post. I don't find this lame, I find it kind of manipulative and insincere. If someone writes me, and tells me they support me behind the scenes but are too embarassed or scared or whatever to step up, I don't really find their support to be very meaningful.

I have no issues that some will privately email to another in support on an issue or sometimes even looking for a support. I also take their words to have the meaning they intended. The conversation was between me and them and not the business of others. I don't discount it nor see their words as being less meaningful because they couldn't/ wouldn't post in public.

What I find pathetic is those that throughout the heresay as a means to gain creditibility to their words because others have "talked to them". I like you find these kind of approaches "manipulate, insincere... and most importantly... Weak! I speak for me and my opinion. Sometimes I speak for my girls as well. But I don't speak for everyone that sends me an email in support of my opinion. Their words of support are not going to motivating me to pickup the flag and charge into the thread welding my words of wit to press their views. They can speak for them selves... just like they sent me a private email. I speak for me and what is mine. I discount those that presume to speak for others to support their opinion as being weak.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to WinsomeDefiance)

RE: The Image that is Given - 6/29/2010 8:11:00 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeffff

quote:

ORIGINAL: RCdc
Personally, I always find the claim that 'I've had lots of people emailing me privately to tell me how great I am and how everyone else sucks' to be pretty lame.

the.dark.

Yeah I love those posts, "you people are so mean and I get letters about it"

Well then, you are getting letters from pussy's.

Like kids say...I hate you and everyone else does too!

I do agree with what julia said though...I have privately emailed someone when they were sharing something personal to share my own experience several times. That I can see happening.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to Jeffff)

RE: The Image that is Given - 6/29/2010 8:15:23 AM

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From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
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quote:

So we have one thread, with two different people suggesting that their opposite views are the most unpopular. So, in reality where does the truth lay?

Here is where the truth lies... when people are posting extremely opposed opinions it gets heated, and those who read those heated opinions don't want the heat so they email the person they think of as representing those opinions and then they relate their experiences or opinions to those "avatars",... which is basically all we are over the internet when it comes to this crap....

I don't think my opinion was superior because people emailed me on the other side about what I said... I just wish they had weighed in over here instead of privately and that they had added their experiences to the thread instead of emailing them to me. I can't change what happened to them, so if they want to get something valuable out of a negative experience it seems that sharing it with others that may find some value in it to be a much better course of action....

I said it on that thread, and I have said it twice here, the gal in question liked opinions other than mine... she probably would have ignored the people that emailed me, which is her right... it is her life after all....

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to RCdc)

RE: The Image that is Given - 6/29/2010 8:19:53 AM

WinsomeDefiance

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quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

I do agree with what julia said though...I have privately emailed someone when they were sharing something personal to share my own experience several times. That I can see happening.

Of course! I've emailed people privately to share personal things that I wasn't interested in throwing out to the general public, or it would have inappropriately derailed a thread. I've had people do the same with me. I'm always honored to have people share a private part of themselves with me. I wouldn't EVER lump them into the category of those who send emails to privately support others because they won't step up and speak honestly on a viewpoint.

(in reply to laurell3)

RE: The Image that is Given - 6/29/2010 8:20:05 AM

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I am sorry, could you repeat that?

I can't hear you over the sound of your tits!

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(in reply to juliaoceania)

RE: The Image that is Given - 6/29/2010 8:24:33 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys

quote:

As for being in an "in crowd", I am far too opinionated to ever be accepted in one....

Where in the pecking order do you think you are? Inquiring minds wanna know, ya know.

I don't spend a lot of time thinking about it.......and if I ever do, someone shoot me...

I have a real life, CM is a way to pass the time. Right now I am not at home to be around my real life comrades, so I get bored and post here....Mostly to laugh at Jeffff and DG

I have nothing of value to add to most of the BDSM threads these days seeing I am suffering a submissive identity crisis at the moment

The only reason I brought it up was you've mentioned a pecking order on some older threads, so it would lead me to believe you think there is some sort of crowd.

As far as the identity crisis..I hope it passes and you can regain your grip, if that's what you choose to grasp for.

Edit:
Stepped away from the computer for a sec as soon as I posted this..Didn't realize I had goofed.

Oh BTW..What constitutes a "real life"..Do you mean like running a business or going out to eat with friends..all around enjoyment of things away from a computer? Cause I think most of us do that.

< Message edited by Icarys -- 6/29/2010 8:38:23 AM >

_____________________________

submission - the feeling of patient, submissive humbleness - the state of being submissive or compliant; meekness.

Alaska Bound-The Official Countdown Has Started!
http://tinyurl.com/872mcu3
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(in reply to juliaoceania)

RE: The Image that is Given - 6/29/2010 8:25:50 AM

WinsomeDefiance

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quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

... The conversation was between me and them and not the business of others. ...

What I find pathetic is those that throughout the heresay as a means to gain creditibility to their words because others have "talked to them". ..... I discount those that presume to speak for others to support their opinion as being weak.

I agree with this perspective as well. A different perspective, one that I hadn't really considered before, but certainly in line with my own views on the situation.

(in reply to KnightofMists)

RE: The Image that is Given - 6/29/2010 8:27:09 AM

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From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeffff

I am sorry, could you repeat that?

I can't hear you over the sound of your tits!

Perhaps the problem is that you are "listening" when you should be "reading"... and I gotta break it to you, my breasts make no noise.....

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to Jeffff)

RE: The Image that is Given - 6/29/2010 8:29:50 AM

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From: Psychoalphadiscobetabioaquadoloop
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Oh Knights let us have it can Kyra knit or not?

Are you really a taker of yarn?

Be a giver, luv.

Someone said they cant operate their computer because there are too many hugs and smiley faces?

Ummmmm I doubt that.

((((((((((

))))))

S Q U E E Z E

_____________________________

"Exaggerate the essential, leave the obvious vague." Vincent Van Gogh

I'd Rather Be With You

Every single line means something.
Jean-Michel Basquiat

(in reply to WinsomeDefiance)

RE: The Image that is Given - 6/29/2010 8:30:02 AM

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From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
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quote:

As far as the identity crisis..I hope it passes and you can regain your grip, if that's what you choose to grasp for.

Thanks for the well wishes...

The important thing is I am happy....

...and I am

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to Icarys)

RE: The Image that is Given - 6/29/2010 8:40:17 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:

As far as the identity crisis..I hope it passes and you can regain your grip, if that's what you choose to grasp for.

Thanks for the well wishes...

The important thing is I am happy....

...and I am

Of course I was being facetious when I said that..I'm happy for you.

_____________________________

submission - the feeling of patient, submissive humbleness - the state of being submissive or compliant; meekness.

Alaska Bound-The Official Countdown Has Started!
http://tinyurl.com/872mcu3
http://alturl.com/mog7m

(in reply to juliaoceania)

RE: The Image that is Given - 6/29/2010 8:42:48 AM

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Being that I am really the heart and soul of the "in-crowd" I feel it is my responsibility to give our collective response on this matter.

We, of the "in-crowd", have been rather distressed of late at the number of people who feel that they have some sort of right to confront our beliefs. If it wasn't so pathetic it would be laughable.

Just who do you think you are?

The "in-crowd" was not something created overnight. It was molded out of time, patience and much sacrifice. All of the words and responses of every poster have been carefully measured, weighed and then calibrated to determine who makes the grade and who becomes insignificant white noise.

You then have to realize that there is an incredibly high degree of mental weakness on this site which is hot. We of the "in-crowd" have no problem blowing our vuvuzela the loudest to attract the feeble minded whom shall be available at our beck and call.

What in the fuck is a "beck and call?" Is beck short for Becky? Because back when I was but a domiboy, Becky Gardella lived down the block and would come over anytime that I ever gave her a ring....I am fairly confident that is from where the phrase originates.

Now you have to couple in the heavy amount of pussy that is on the site (heavy pussy...Fat thread, anyone?)..just waiting to throw itself onto the most purest, loudest and righteous of Doms. They are like a dishonored Japanese General waiting to perform hari kari. They will fall on any sword out of some odd form of noble subby sacrifice.

So it pays off to talk in absolutes and how you have no weaknesses. In the Pekin prison scandal, where the guy died from a ruptured spleen but was also diagnosed as having hep- c, tourettes, MS, walking pneumonia and the aids....My only response was that, "I would have toughed it out."

Chicks dig the long ball.

In closing, I just wish everyone would accept the "in-crowd" as their overlords, enjoy their fucking day, please stop bitching and rocking the boat.

_____________________________

(in reply to juliaoceania)

RE: The Image that is Given - 6/29/2010 8:44:18 AM

VideoAdminAlpha

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I am not sure if you noticed, but I believe the posts you are speaking of occurred in July 09. Somewhere around Nov-Dec, a lot of things changed in these forums. I cannot say with certainty about the period before, although it has been my experience as a poster in the past that the mods were as impartial as they were capable of being. Humans are after all humans, andSaying that, now, tickets are reviewed(as they were before but by several mods, so there is inherent impartiality in that alone) What you dont see also about the thread you are talking about( we looked it up just now) is the other poster you are talking about also had posts pulled immediately after yours. Sometimes the mods are quick enough (not always unfortunately) that you do not see the other material. Regardless, now there are more mods, and hopefully, not only are they impartial but they are PERCEIVED to be impartial. That is not how it was before, whether or not previous moderators were impartial, some had the PERCEPTION they were not.

edited to add: you have a unique way of putting it, domi!

edited yet again to add: several posters have noticed you avoiding the panties thread as far as responding, domi. The wommenz have clamored on that thread for you....not going to hijack this one, but you were asked some questions there, you want to go answer their inquiring minds??>**scoots out door**

< Message edited by VideoAdminAlpha -- 6/29/2010 8:48:43 AM >

_____________________________

You can't please all the people all of the time.Unfortunately there are times you cannot please any of them :( You can only do your best, and hope they realize that.

(in reply to ranja)

RE: The Image that is Given - 6/29/2010 8:49:35 AM

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quote:

I like you find these kind of approaches "manipulate, insincere... and most importantly... Weak!

Not everyone that does this is weak...Hell I forget who said this just days ago but it's a well known poster...She mentioned that she emailed a Dom when she first started posting because she was afraid of how the Dom tore people to shreds(I'm sure it was DG)...Maybe she WAS weak but she doesn't come off that way now.

Some people ARE more timid than others. I can understand how someone like yourself might find it hard to put yourself into another's shoes..It's no easy task when your the kinda person who dislikes what you see as weak. We aren't always spot on though...some of us are surely better at picking out things in people but hey we have our own realities.

Edited for clarity

< Message edited by Icarys -- 6/29/2010 8:55:32 AM >

_____________________________

submission - the feeling of patient, submissive humbleness - the state of being submissive or compliant; meekness.

Alaska Bound-The Official Countdown Has Started!
http://tinyurl.com/872mcu3
http://alturl.com/mog7m

(in reply to KnightofMists)

RE: The Image that is Given - 6/29/2010 8:57:07 AM

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From: Psychoalphadiscobetabioaquadoloop
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In here is not much different than in the supposed real world.

People who are in the in crowd are not always the most 'in'.

Sometimes the in crowd is more like pop music, it is good, mainstream, so-called balanced, but when you get to the fringes of it all where the radar is reaching out further the music can be even more raw and exciting.

_____________________________

"Exaggerate the essential, leave the obvious vague." Vincent Van Gogh

I'd Rather Be With You

Every single line means something.
Jean-Michel Basquiat

(in reply to Icarys)

RE: The Image that is Given - 6/29/2010 8:58:37 AM

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From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys

quote:

I like you find these kind of approaches "manipulate, insincere... and most importantly... Weak!

Not everyone that does this is weak...Hell I forget who said this just days ago but it's a well known poster(I'm sure it was DG)...She mentioned that she emailed a Dom when she first started posting because she was afraid of how the Dom tore people to shreds...Maybe she WAS weak but she doesn't come off that way now.

Some people ARE more timid than others. I can understand how someone like yourself might find it hard to put yourself into another's shoes..It's no easy task when your the kinda person who dislikes what you see as weak. We aren't always spot on though...some of us are surely better at picking out things in people but hey we have our own realities.

There are things I would not post on a forum because it might be hurtful if people tore apart my experiences... that actually happened to me when I first joined here and posted something of a very personal nature and people weighed in on whether or not my feelings about my personal experience were justified. I thought it was hurtful at the time. I have grown a thicker skin since... I also learned, don't expose an Achilles heel unless you are prepared to have someone cut through it.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to Icarys)

RE: The Image that is Given - 6/29/2010 9:10:55 AM

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I don't believe in the concept of " too far". What most people consider to far is often just where I am warming up.

Having said that, I have canceled one or two posts that might have been unnecessarily cruel.

_____________________________

"If you don't live it, it won't come out your horn." Charlie Parker

(in reply to juliaoceania)

RE: The Image that is Given - 6/29/2010 9:13:16 AM

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From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeffff

I don't believe in the concept of " too far". What most people consider to far is often just where I am warming up.

Having said that, I have canceled one or two posts that might have been unnecessarily cruel.

Sinergy used to tell me, "think twice, post once"

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to Jeffff)

RE: The Image that is Given - 6/29/2010 9:14:32 AM

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Thinking?... before posting?

Interesting concept.

If only you had thought more about parking.....................

< Message edited by Jeffff -- 6/29/2010 9:16:29 AM >

_____________________________

"If you don't live it, it won't come out your horn." Charlie Parker

(in reply to juliaoceania)

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