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ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

You would prfer the term... non infected?

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ORIGINAL: Tantriqu

Oh, my hat.

OP, don't touch ANYONE who says he's allergic to all types of condoms: anyone who refuses to use condoms is likely slutty AND contagious: venereal warts, chlamydia, herpes, gonorrhea, syphilis, HIV/AIDS are all much more likely in someone who behaves like that.

ALWAYS get new partners tested for ALL STD's: insist on it, since a condom can only protect 70% of the time, and only where it touches: a lot of women get herpes in their asscracks after men take off their condoms and they spoon.
For men, testing for everything is just a bloodtest and a urine test, so they have no excuses. If they won't be tested, they don't care about you or their health.
Insist on his sending copies of his tests to your doctor if he won't show them to you. Remember the US armed forces guy, 'Sgt Swinger' in the news last year? http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/investigation/sergeant-swinger-charged-hiv-case

A dude lying about condoms is going to be lying about a lot of things, and will be sexually selfish, if not a sociopath. Run away!

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connected to a drainage system.

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ORIGINAL: lonelyblueboi

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ORIGINAL: Toppingfrmbottom

However if all you're worried about preventing is pregnancy, because you're with a partner you know is clean and good to go in not having ickies he can pass along, that's all ya need:)

Can you not use the term clean? That is amazingly offensive to people with HIV. Just because someone has HIV doesn't mean they're dirty. A little sensitivity is helpful. Poz people are people too, and lead sexual lives as well.

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ORIGINAL: Aylee

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ORIGINAL: lonelyblueboi

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ORIGINAL: Toppingfrmbottom

However if all you're worried about preventing is pregnancy, because you're with a partner you know is clean and good to go in not having ickies he can pass along, that's all ya need:)

Can you not use the term clean? That is amazingly offensive to people with HIV. Just because someone has HIV doesn't mean they're dirty. A little sensitivity is helpful. Poz people are people too, and lead sexual lives as well.

Pssst.  It comes from the phrase, "A clean bill of health."  A Bill of Health was a certificate that a ship carried saying that there were no infectious diseases among the crew. 

It has nothing to do with how often you, personally, bathe. 

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ORIGINAL: lonelyblueboi

You know, it really doesn't matter where the term came from, what matters is that it is incredibly offensive! If I told you that the term ni&&er actually originated in some neutral way and didn't originally mean anything offensive, would you still think it was wrong to call people of African descent that? I sure hope so! Its not about where a word originated from, but rather the effect it has on people that matters. Its called being sensitive to others, an important human trait. Maybe its just one you don't have? But I on the other know I do, and I would never use the term clean to refer to myself because I know how hurtful it is to those with HIV, because it implies that they are somehow dirty, and that is just wrong!

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ORIGINAL: Aylee

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ORIGINAL: lonelyblueboi

You know, it really doesn't matter where the term came from, what matters is that it is incredibly offensive! If I told you that the term ni&&er actually originated in some neutral way and didn't originally mean anything offensive, would you still think it was wrong to call people of African descent that? I sure hope so! Its not about where a word originated from, but rather the effect it has on people that matters. Its called being sensitive to others, an important human trait. Maybe its just one you don't have? But I on the other know I do, and I would never use the term clean to refer to myself because I know how hurtful it is to those with HIV, because it implies that they are somehow dirty, and that is just wrong!

Actually this whole thing reminds me of the insanity from Dallas a couple of years ago over the term, "Black Hole," being offensive. 

I actually thought that knowing the etymology of the term/phrase might make you feel better. 

For some reason you seem to have confused the phrase with the Old English usage of "unclean."  As in morally impure or defiled. 

No one has suggested that and so, yes, I think that you are being overly sensitive.  TFTB used the term, "clean," as shorthand for "clean bill of health," correctly, just as Mayfield used the term "black hole" correctly for what he was describing. 

BTW, the term "N&$$#r" is a slur. 

Having a clean bill of health means that you are not infectious. 

I find it offensive that you came on this thread accusing TFTB of insensitivity.  I also find it offensive that you desire to curtail others right to free speech. 

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ORIGINAL: lonelyblueboi
You know, it really doesn't matter where the term came from, what matters is that it is incredibly offensive! If I told you that the term ni&&er actually originated in some neutral way and didn't originally mean anything offensive, would you still think it was wrong to call people of African descent that? I sure hope so! Its not about where a word originated from, but rather the effect it has on people that matters. Its called being sensitive to others, an important human trait. Maybe its just one you don't have? But I on the other know I do, and I would never use the term clean to refer to myself because I know how hurtful it is to those with HIV, because it implies that they are somehow dirty, and that is just wrong!

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ORIGINAL: lonelyblueboi

Go ahead, find me offensive. I'm not trying to take anyone's right to free speech away, I'm simply trying to educate people on the effects their "free speech" is having on people who are fighting every day with a life threatening disease. I think in that case a little sensitivity couldn't hurt. And yes, I think implying that someone is dirty is just as much a slur as the n word. Trust me, I know, I've dealt with it for awhile now. And it gets on my nerves every time I hear it! But if you think its okay to insult people under the guise of free speech, then you just go ahead... all you're doing is proving your own immaturity and lack of understanding of the intention of free speech.

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ORIGINAL: Aylee
And I tell you again (this would be the third time, unfortunately you are not a computer that works with "I tell you three times") you have put your own definition on the phrase. 

It means non-infectious. 

Not un-clean.  Not morally repugnant. 

You are feeling offense where there is none. 

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ORIGINAL: RapierFugue

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ORIGINAL: Aylee
And I tell you again (this would be the third time, unfortunately you are not a computer that works with "I tell you three times") you have put your own definition on the phrase. 

It means non-infectious. 

Not un-clean.  Not morally repugnant. 

You are feeling offense where there is none. 

I was somewhat boggled by this objection to the word "Clean", so I bunged a few phrases including and surrounding it into google. It would appear that this is something that's sprung up in the last few years, and even forms part of the FAQ/Posting guidelines on some sexual health/GUM/STI/STD forums, in terms of "please don't refer to people with X as "clean"" ...

It seems to have snuck in under my radar, so "STD/STI-free" yes, "non-infectious" ok, but "clean", no. Apparently. Initially I thought "well that's a bit bloody cheeky! It's only a word, and I'll use any word I bloody well like!", but then I had a bit of a think ...

Granted, I think those objecting to its use have about as much chance of stopping society at large using the term as I have of becoming the next Pope (and I'm not even Catholic), but it does seem to be out there at the moment, as an objection, so (having thought it through carefully) I'll not be using the term anymore, on the grounds that its use doesn't really hamper my ability to describe individuals as "HIV+" (or "Herpes sufferers", or "STD+" or whatever), whereas my using it might offend someone who probably has enough on their plate to start with.

Now of course someone(s) can pop up with something along the lines of "score one for the thought police", but (again, having thought it through) my feelings are a) it's not a very good word to describe the state of being "HIV/STD-free" anyway, since it's perfectly possible to be HIV/STD-free and unwashed and b) it's not much effort to use another term other than "clean", in order to spare people stigma and offense. The term "clean bill of health" strikes me BTW as fine, if used in its entirety, as it's a historical term that has a very specific meaning, just not the shorthand "clean" to mean HIV-neg/STD-neg.

So there we have it; that rarest of occasions - me changing my mind in the space of 24 hours

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ORIGINAL: lonelyblueboi
Thank you RapierFugue for your sensitivity and understanding.