RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain authority?

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RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain aut... - 10/26/2010 7:55:06 PM

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NuevaVida, I am not sure what you are needing from this exchange but whatever got you all giddy, glad i can be of service. grins, now here's a question for you -- whatever pat in the back concept you are having now because you believe i somehow showed you something i have never shown before, are you seriously going to think about it 5 minutes from now? Is it seriously that deep? I will hope your answer is no.

As for my headaches, its not something i'd wish on my worst enemy. I probably would make light of it also if i wasn't the one experiencing it all my life.

I always ask why, if people wish to answer it they do, if they don't they don't. It's really not for me a gotcha moment. That perhaps is the difference between you and i.

angel

< Message edited by barelynangel -- 10/26/2010 7:58:46 PM >

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What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
R.W. Emerson

(in reply to NuevaVida)

RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain aut... - 10/26/2010 9:24:39 PM

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Um, wow, angel, you sure read a lot into my posts.

For what it's worth - I'm not giddy, I didn't make light of your headaches, I could give a shit about patting myself on the back, and there was no "gotcha moment." And I already told you that this isn't that deep, so I'm not sure why you would even ask that.

What a strange exchange this has been.

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Live Simply. Love Generously. Care Deeply. Speak Kindly.

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RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain aut... - 10/27/2010 3:35:43 AM

WolfyMontgomery

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Joined: 9/28/2010
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You're right, I have no clue what your MOTIVE is, just like how you don't have a clue what my motive is. To think that you do probably means that you're reading too deeply into my posts, just as you accuse me of doing, which I don't believe I do, I just read it and hopefully learn another perspective on a topic.

Yes, if there is something that really speaks out to me, I would go try and experience it myself to see if it applied to me. There have been plenty of changes in my life that one could look back on and see that the trigger was sparked by a conversation with someone. Obviously I don't look through all... 83928472398572-whatever points of view there are, but I have no problems looking at the ones that are presented to me. It isn't painful, it's just curiosity to see how other people tick and if something happens to stick out I will look into it further on my own.

I don't know where you got the impression that I was judging someone, I just said that certain actions and words tend to point towards people being closed minded and unwilling to learn or even discuss beyond saying that another person is wrong, which a lot of people tend to not like. And a lot of those kinds of people who do revel in their closed mindedness are, indeed, assholes, because they are rude about their opinions and put down others for having different opinions. I wasn't calling you an asshole, just pointing out that some people might think of you as such due to some of the ways you word things, seeing as how they are similar to what those kinds of people say. Pointing out common occurrences isn't passing judgment. Pointing out observations that I notice isn't passing judgment - or so I thought.

I try to be open-minded about anything, even things I do not like or understand. I cannot guarantee that I always WILL be, because you're right, it is impossible to be completely open-minded about ALL things ALL the time, but I will damn well try.

I don't accuse you of anything, though I do pose the question - do you try to understand the "L" concept, or due to the fact that you couldn't understand it at one point means that you never will so you never try?

Also, I didn't realize we were playing a game - thought we were just having a discussion. Though if it's a game to you I can see where our opinions differ. I don't treat discussions as a game, though neither do I take them so seriously as to give me headaches. Sorry if you do.

Oh yeah, and odd coincidence, earlier today Master and I looked up the world's population. You're way off the mark. Only 6 billion people (about 6,800,000,000, which is like half of what you said there was). Yeah, THIS part is a bit of a game, because the thought made me laugh when I realized it.

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-A Wolf of a Different Color

Fear me and my Gleaming Metal Chompers of DOOM!
..........that means my braces. >_>

(in reply to barelynangel)

RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain aut... - 10/27/2010 4:20:44 AM

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Wolfy, are you seriously going to keep trying to tell me I NEED TO SEE THINGS as you do and TRY and do things as YOU do because THAT'S THE RIGHT WAY to do things?

Secondly, i have been on these boards a long time and i have posted the same way the whole time i have been here. grins you aren't the first person to start calling me names -- and yes, Wolfy no one here is stupid, you were calling me an asshole because you don't like how i do things -- but i guess YOUR way is THE way to do it and somehow YOU think i MUST do things your way or i am an asshole.

You've been on these boards for what Wolfy a month or so, glad you are here to "lern" me how to do it. lol. YOU want approval on these boards Wolfy, its in every post you make especially as you try and "lern" me how to be accepted lol. I don't need too be, i am comfortable enough in who i am to post as i do. Oh don't worry, you will find enough people who don't LIKE how i post and therefore, don't like me.

In the end Wolfy, all i have done is said that MY WAY is THE WAY, and if you don't like it do it your way. Yet, you keep trying to tell me i shouldn't do it that way because YOU don't like it and I should DO THINGS YOUR WAY.

Funny how that works out doesn't it.

Finally, why do you care what i do or don't do about the "L" concept. I mean seriously Wolfy. Are you really that offended that i don't understand the "L" concept. What about MY concept Wolfy? Have you remotely tried to understand that? I would say based on your posts no you haven't. You really could care less about it because you are cozy in the fact many people approve of your way. But yet i MUST want, need, or try to understand your way? Wolfy, this is not the first time this "L" concept of discussion has come up on these boards, so despite this discussion being new to you, its not to many of us. The "L" concept is like a strange bug, whenever i come across it i may poke at it a little to see if anything new comes from same, but then i shrug and simply continue on. No one, not even you Wolfy, has said anything new in this discussion that hasn't been said in the past.

Wolfy, you are the type of person who is cozy in the fact that her way is a majority way. So you really aren't as open-minded as you believe, you are just secure in the fact a lot of people do things as you do. I not only had a relationship based upon ownership and not love, it was also Gorean, it was offline, and i never even knew there were places like this until after the relationship ended. I am used to being in the minority and no Wolfy, i have never felt the need to be a part of the majority or even understand the majority. Just as the majority has never felt the need to understand the minority. Its actually amusing because the majority is actually very closed minded because they really do get their knickers in a twist when someone from the minority doesn't agree with them or -- gasps -- accept their way. And while sometimes they give a cursory shrug toward the minority way, they don't accept it OR try and understand it because well gee their way is THE way.

I've learned along time ago after experiencing boards like this Wolfy that my way is not the way most people do things. I also learned a long time ago that i am okay with that. you are the one who seems to not 1) like the way i do things and are pretty much DEMANDING lol i must see your way, understand your way, and accept your way and 2) i must post like you do because you think your way is the correct acceptable way.

PLEASE stop being a hypocrit and trying to tell me i am being unreasonable as you pretty much LIST OUT what i should change and how i should do things and even use insult to try and manipulate me into doing so.

grins, this is another way we differ as far as being a slave -- my Master would have probably put me on silence or depending on the situation smacked me across the floor, if i remotely attempted to use passive-aggressive manipulation on anyone when i was a slave to him as if its okay. As you stated your Master was here when you posted same, i presume he okays that type of thing. But again, that was just OUR way, and THE WAY, its obvious your way is different lol.

angel

Edited to take out repetitive info as i am typing this while multitasking.

< Message edited by barelynangel -- 10/27/2010 4:39:15 AM >

_____________________________

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
R.W. Emerson

(in reply to WolfyMontgomery)

RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain aut... - 10/27/2010 11:45:16 AM

WolfyMontgomery

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Err, no, I wasn't calling you an asshole. No, I'm not forcing you to do it "My Way". Don't put words in my mouth. I said that a lot of people that DO it your way happen to also have the mindset that everyone else is lower than them much of the time, that's ALL. .Re-read my words please - I don't call you an asshole, I just stated that some of the things you say are the same things AS those assholes who think everyone is less than them. You apparently aren't one of them in the sense that you've got enough sense to say "if you don't like MY way, do it YOUR way" because the types who typically talk about not understanding other ways are the ones who think all other ways are WRONG and thus are inferior in all ways, and then act like they have a right to insult those people of different views.

I didn't say your way was WRONG, just that some of the things you said made me think of those people.

I'm not here to teach you anything, thanks for bringing the conversation to insults. I was here trying to LEARN myself, whether or not someone else learned anything from things I say is totally up to them, but that doesn't stop me from sharing my imput - or is it okay when YOU do it but no one else? After all, you say that that is what you do, even if you don't care what people do with that information, so when someone else brings out information that might be contrary to yours, they're trying to FORCE it upon you?

I would FIGURE the reason why I cared about the "L" concept was because THIS THREAD IS ABOUT LOVE. DUH. The reason why I asked if you were even interested in understanding is the fact that you're POSTING in the LOVE thread, which is basically ASKING people to discuss it with you, so of COURSE PEOPLE ARE GOING TO WANT TO DISCUSS IT. You don't HAVE to do anything, though smart people figure that if someone posts on a thread, it's because they want to discuss it to share what they have to say and to understand other points of view.

I completely understand the concept of submitting without love. As I said in a previous post, I unconsciously submit to practically everyone. I can easily SUBMIT without being in love or being loved. I just can't be OWNED without there being a love connection, personally. I understand how some people don't need that feeling to be owned - I have a friend IRL who was owned for a time by a man she'd only known for a month, they didn't love each other, she just liked the feeling of having someone take control of her and he liked being in control. I get it. Doesn't mean I have to like it or want to do it myself, but I still understand how it can work for some people.

Where was I saying you were being unreasonable? Seriously. I didn't think I was being passive aggressive, just pointing out observations and sharing my views. Didn't know that was a crime.

_____________________________

~Eleven

-A Wolf of a Different Color

Fear me and my Gleaming Metal Chompers of DOOM!
..........that means my braces. >_>

(in reply to barelynangel)

RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain aut... - 10/27/2010 12:05:42 PM

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Ok wolfy.

_____________________________

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
R.W. Emerson

(in reply to WolfyMontgomery)

RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain aut... - 10/27/2010 1:41:29 PM

Zevar

Posts: 801
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quote:

quote:

I will now present my answers’ in regard to the following questions you asked:

1] Question: Do you see any conflict between how much love/affection you can lavish on a slave, and your dominance over her?

1] Answer:

I do not see a conflict so much as I realize that I have no real interest in lavishing love toward slave who I would allow to serve me. My dominance is immutable. Therefore nothing is capable of producing conditions that would bring about conflicting issues in my ability to rule in all instances.

Love is not an affliction that it could cause me to lose control. Instead it allows me to be in control in a deeper way than I thought possible. Thus my self mastery is enhanced by my efforts of mastering my abilities to control my inner most unseen being in a strengthened focused manner.

Intriguing that you link self-mastery with mastery over her. But if I may clarify the above, do you not feel or display love for your slave?

Love is not the identifying nature of Ownership in regards to how I define it. Mastery is, i.e. complete control over whom I have determined to Own i.e. unrelentingly rule with an exacting dominance.

I do not necessarily include what I would term “ Love “ within my framework of an underlying set of ideals of Ownership, as I define it. I am quite capable of Loving. I simply do not need to Love in order to demonstrate Ownership.

In the nuthsell, I perceive the distinction between Ownership and Love as unrelated, one to the other as follows:

A] Ownership is an irrevocable right of possession or the right of control i.e. dominance over whomever I own.

B] While Love is an emotional response that is at all times evident of an unyielding intense affection, that also is capable of expressing adoration and indicative of an irresistible fondness, which sets my affections apart from anyone or anything else that I hold beloved or desired.

I do not necessarily equate the same requisite of Ownership and Mastery as is related to a woman that identifies as submissive, but with a slave indeed I do, unquestionably.

Forgive my delay in replying to your entry as quoted above. I had not re-read this entire thread until now.

Take care!

(in reply to Jaybeee)

RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain aut... - 10/27/2010 4:04:57 PM

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So I guess the answer to the ops question is, some people need love, others don't. Lets go with the flow and enjoy the ride

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(in reply to Zevar)

RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain aut... - 10/27/2010 4:07:56 PM

WolfyMontgomery

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quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz

So I guess the answer to the ops question is, some people need love, others don't. Lets go with the flow and enjoy the ride

Makes sense to me =D

_____________________________

~Eleven

-A Wolf of a Different Color

Fear me and my Gleaming Metal Chompers of DOOM!
..........that means my braces. >_>

(in reply to allthatjaz)

RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain aut... - 10/28/2010 7:34:31 AM

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The control and dominance is how I express my love, and through dominance is how my girl wants to be loved.

(in reply to WolfyMontgomery)

RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain aut... - 10/28/2010 5:35:24 PM

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Always? She never has a bad day where she wants to be held instead? Never wants a partner to eat popcorn with while watching Blazing Saddles for the nth time? Never wants you to be a friend and listen instead of giving her orders?

I don't understand people with those kind of limited relationships unless they have a primary partner who can fulfill all those other needs.

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RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain aut... - 10/28/2010 5:37:20 PM

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DesFIP, do you KNOW what an M/s relationship really is, because by your statement above- you really don't.

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What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
R.W. Emerson

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RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain aut... - 10/31/2010 11:50:42 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Zevar

A] Ownership is an irrevocable right of possession or the right of control i.e. dominance over whomever I own.

Yeah, but you do know that the notion of "irrevocable right of possession" over another person is utter nonsense... don't you?

You do know, that the putative "property" you refer to can - at a moment's change of mind - call you a jackass and tell you to fuck off, right?

- Just checking.

[Edit to add =]

That is not to say that I think, for a nanosecond, that anyone could possibly have ever called you a jackass or told you to fuck off. Please don't infer that I am trying to suggest that you're a jackass.

< Message edited by crazyml -- 10/31/2010 12:10:57 PM >

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RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain aut... - 10/31/2010 6:53:06 PM

Zevar

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Be Well!

< Message edited by Zevar -- 10/31/2010 7:06:52 PM >

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RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain aut... - 11/1/2010 1:00:53 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: OneMaster4You

It is importnant never to forget the dynamic that brought you together. The need to be controlled and given guidance is always essential in the relationship. One can love in a firm disciplinarian way. To show affection is not a sign of weakness. To forget ones' position is!

One must always be wary of the submissive who attempts to top from bottom. Just like children they will test you. A weak parent gives in to the child. A strong parent stays firm and true to the realtionship of parent/ child out of love.

Such is the same dynamic between submissive and Master. always be Master first, lover second. To allow down times when you share sensitive and intimate moments is not unusual. Hpowever know that they will always challenge you. it is their way of asking... Do you love me enough to be strong for me?

Be strong and never forget who is the Master and who is the submissive. Love her for that. Respect her for that. Hold her on a pedestal for that.

Her submission, her obedience, her surrender is her gift to you. She will always want to make sure you are worthy of it.

Gotta love her..... nuff said

OneMaster4you

A very inspirational post, OM, and a clarifying one, I think the Parent/Child relationship is the nearest widely-understood example of mutual love between an authority and subordinate. Also, it has indeed been my experience that many women, however vanilla, will periodically test us, and to paraphrase a man I despise...we will show the world of womanhood, that we will pass that test.

Could you clarify what you meant by holding her on a pedestal BECAUSE she is the submissive? To me this seems counter to the natural order of keeping womenfolk firmly in their place, and making certain they know it.

(in reply to OneMaster4You)

RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain aut... - 11/22/2010 7:18:22 AM

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Again with the her/she. Slave is NOT gender specific

Anyway,,, I would rather love my slave than hate my slave. Wouldnt you?

(in reply to Jaybeee)

RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain aut... - 11/22/2010 1:47:36 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: masterlink65

Again with the her/she. Slave is NOT gender specific

Anyway,,, I would rather love my slave than hate my slave. Wouldnt you?

Yeah I would of course. I'm only asking about female slaves.

(in reply to masterlink65)

RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain aut... - 11/22/2010 7:40:53 PM

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quote:

Yeah, but you do know that the notion of "irrevocable right of possession" over another person is utter nonsense... don't you?

I do.

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RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain aut... - 11/22/2010 8:43:07 PM

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When speaking from a personal perspective, it is often gender specific. My slaves are all gender specific.

quote:

ORIGINAL: masterlink65

Again with the her/she. Slave is NOT gender specific

Anyway,,, I would rather love my slave than hate my slave. Wouldnt you?

_____________________________

When speaking of slaves people always tend to ignore this definition "One who is abjectly subservient to a specified person or influence."

(in reply to masterlink65)

RE: Being in love with a slave - can a man maintain aut... - 11/24/2010 1:20:23 PM

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There are 3 elements here. Love, authority, ability. If the ability is weak the authority is weakened by love. If the authority is weak it is strengthened by ability. If the love is weak it is too bad.

Arturas.

(in reply to NuevaVida)

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