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Looking for a Master to Mentor and lern from - 2/17/2011 8:06:06 PM

Posts: 7
Joined: 12/31/2010
Status: offline

I am so very new to the lifestyle, and I also am looking at my self thinking I know I am a dom I like control over others but yet I feel lost and feel like a puppy of a owner I don't like this feeling. With my friends and others I very much need to be in charge, I don't really like even taking orders from my own supervisors. So I am looking for help and Ideas or a person in my area willing to sit down with me and help me learn more how to be a better master and keep my pets happy and scared of me(in the mood that is.)

RE: Looking for a Master to Mentor and lern from - 2/17/2011 8:15:19 PM

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

Out of curiosity, why aren't you looking in your local BDSM community for the mentor that you would like to have? If you want someone to show you the ropes, so to speak, don't you want to see how they run their dynamic with your own eyes? All of the stuff that you want to be taught, isn't it practical to verify that the person teaching you is not only talking about it, but it's really what he does? When it comes to the fun stuff, learning topping techniques is so much easier having someone physically show you how it's done.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to 1Owner1pet)

RE: Looking for a Master to Mentor and lern from - 2/17/2011 8:29:33 PM

Posts: 371
Joined: 8/9/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Out of curiosity, why aren't you looking in your local BDSM community for the mentor that you would like to have? If you want someone to show you the ropes, so to speak, don't you want to see how they run their dynamic with your own eyes? All of the stuff that you want to be taught, isn't it practical to verify that the person teaching you is not only talking about it, but it's really what he does? When it comes to the fun stuff, learning topping techniques is so much easier having someone physically show you how it's done.

Some people don't like to get involved with their local community for whatever reason. Plus, something over the web can be a lot less threatening to a new dom, a lot less "real" emotionally speaking.

_____________________________

I speak not of The Way, but only My Way. Think it not an indictment of Your Way.

I'm male. I know it sounds female. Work with me.

(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: Looking for a Master to Mentor and lern from - 2/17/2011 8:55:33 PM

Posts: 7
Joined: 12/31/2010
Status: offline

The thing is I will take what ever I can find. Palliata already messaged me thank you by the way. But I don't even know how to find my "local community" its not like they have a big neon sign with the words "BDSM training here" So you could also say I am looking for that as well.

(in reply to Palliata)

RE: Looking for a Master to Mentor and lern from - 2/17/2011 9:18:36 PM

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

Here's part of the section that is under the Frequently Asked Questions from the General Board:

Find Munches/Events In Your Area

To find public BDSM events in your area check the Upcoming Events section or click the link below to see what’s available in your area.
http://www.drkdesyre.com/index.htm

Another tip is to google your city + BDSM. If you live in a really small town like Me, you might have to try for a larger city that's close to you.

If that's something that interests you, it could give you the opportunity to meet some folks who have D/s dynamics. It might even be beneficial to your pet because she'll have the opportunity to become friends with the sub of the Dominant who is mentoring you. Win/win.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to 1Owner1pet)

RE: Looking for a Master to Mentor and lern from - 2/18/2011 6:49:37 AM

Posts: 2045
Joined: 2/4/2008
From: Washington, DC area
Status: offline

google is your friend "minnesota+bdsm"

my guess is you'll find stuff... note that if you live in a rural area, you might have to travel.. lots of folks travel...

eta ... ok, should have read before I responded... ignore me.. listen to the ever wise and wonderful Lady Pact

< Message edited by Madame4a -- 2/18/2011 6:50:21 AM >

_____________________________

You're crazy bitch
But you f*ck so good, I'm on top of it
When I dream, I'm doing you all night
Scratches all down my back to keep me right on

(in reply to 1Owner1pet)

RE: Looking for a Master to Mentor and lern from - 2/18/2011 7:28:49 AM

Posts: 222
Joined: 2/7/2011
From: Glasgow, Scotland
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Out of curiosity, why aren't you looking in your local BDSM community for the mentor that you would like to have?

My guess is, like a lot of people new to it, she had no idea such a community existed, and came here for advice on how to get started. (which you're giving)

You're awesomely helpful miss ^_^

(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: Looking for a Master to Mentor and lern from - 2/18/2011 7:31:10 AM

Posts: 222
Joined: 2/7/2011
From: Glasgow, Scotland
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: 1Owner1pet

The thing is I will take what ever I can find.

This isn't a good attitude to have. Unfortunately, BDSM does seem to attract a lot of people who are...interesting. not in a good way.
Use discretion in choosing who to play with. Personally I'd advise looking for people who have something to talk about besides BDSM, that helps weed out a lot of people you probably don't want to associate with. ^_^

(in reply to 1Owner1pet)

RE: Looking for a Master to Mentor and lern from - 2/18/2011 8:40:49 AM

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Nanako
My guess is, like a lot of people new to it, she had no idea such a community existed, and came here for advice on how to get started. (which you're giving)

You're awesomely helpful miss ^_^

Bah. You give Me entirely too much credit. It's nothing more than common sense. If someone wanted to learn how to fly, would they really rely on someone who doesn't spend any time in the air? I'd want someone who is the best teacher that I could find. Someone who is currently leaving the ground, rather than telling Me stories about what they 'used to' do or how they think it should work from what they've read. I want proven and current success. In that aspect, I want the best of the best.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Nanako)

RE: Looking for a Master to Mentor and lern from - 2/18/2011 8:42:17 AM

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

but..but.. LadyP.. you ARE the best!! I've had references!!

*hugs*

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: Looking for a Master to Mentor and lern from - 2/18/2011 10:23:56 AM

Posts: 222
Joined: 2/7/2011
From: Glasgow, Scotland
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
Bah. You give Me entirely too much credit. It's nothing more than common sense. If someone wanted to learn how to fly, would they really rely on someone who doesn't spend any time in the air? I'd want someone who is the best teacher that I could find. Someone who is currently leaving the ground, rather than telling Me stories about what they 'used to' do or how they think it should work from what they've read. I want proven and current success. In that aspect, I want the best of the best.

Such an ironic example!
If I wanted to learn to fly (which I actually do) until recently I had no idea where or who to turn to. And so I turned to the internet. Through google, I found out that you can actually get flying lessons at Glasgow airport, along with contact details of who to talk to about it ^_^
I had no idea about this, I always thought airports were only for big commercial jet liners, or politicians'/billionaires' private planes

(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: Looking for a Master to Mentor and lern from - 2/22/2011 4:32:14 AM

Posts: 39
Joined: 2/16/2011
Status: offline

you need to watch yourself, I can see you getting tied up and butt fucked by some weirdo. You are eager and unguided and the wrong person will find you. My advice find a dorkier person than you and lean on him/her in a dominate way, not a bully but dominate way. Once you see them bend just go from there. You can start a lil journal on here so we can read and give you advice on what to try next. I think this will be the safest for you right now.

(in reply to Nanako)

RE: Looking for a Master to Mentor and lern from - 2/22/2011 5:34:00 AM

Posts: 1362
Joined: 6/17/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: reekon

you need to watch yourself, I can see you getting tied up and butt fucked by some weirdo. You are eager and unguided and the wrong person will find you. My advice find a dorkier person than you and lean on him/her in a dominate way, not a bully but dominate way. Once you see them bend just go from there. You can start a lil journal on here so we can read and give you advice on what to try next. I think this will be the safest for you right now.

I believe the OP is a male (at least according to his shared profile). Why should he be worried about being "butt fucked" by someone who has something to teach? Also, wouldn't the "safest" thing be to learn techniques from someone who is an actual practitioner of an activity who can teach in person?

(in reply to reekon)

RE: Looking for a Master to Mentor and lern from - 2/22/2011 6:05:51 AM

Posts: 39
Joined: 2/16/2011
Status: offline

lol, there is nothing wrong with being but fucked if that's your thang. The key work you missed was "weirdo". Come onI want everyone who has replied here to be real honest. Tell me you can't see this person be in a male or female getting messed over by some prick pretending to be a dom willing to teach?

quote:

ORIGINAL: BonesFromAsh

quote:

ORIGINAL: reekon

you need to watch yourself, I can see you getting tied up and butt fucked by some weirdo. You are eager and unguided and the wrong person will find you. My advice find a dorkier person than you and lean on him/her in a dominate way, not a bully but dominate way. Once you see them bend just go from there. You can start a lil journal on here so we can read and give you advice on what to try next. I think this will be the safest for you right now.

I believe the OP is a male (at least according to his shared profile). Why should he be worried about being "butt fucked" by someone who has something to teach? Also, wouldn't the "safest" thing be to learn techniques from someone who is an actual practitioner of an activity who can teach in person?

(in reply to BonesFromAsh)

RE: Looking for a Master to Mentor and lern from - 2/22/2011 6:11:54 AM

poise

Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline

That's the same as saying everytime I cross the street I'm going to get hit by a car.
The OP came here for advice and a possible mentor, which to me says they are interested
in learning instead of just jumping into things. They could also be quietly reading all
the other very informative threads here. Not everyone out there is a monster you know.

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to reekon)

RE: Looking for a Master to Mentor and lern from - 2/22/2011 6:20:40 AM

Posts: 39
Joined: 2/16/2011
Status: offline

No not everyone is a monster, but all it takes is one and we can all play dumb but from first impressions the masses take him/her as new and not knowing to much about the lifestyle. We all know there is more evil than good out there and he/she is prey.

I don't have alot of friends cause I never was one for being "politically correct" I say what needs to be said and most times say what other feel they can't or shouldn't say. I am very Cynical and never wrong lol

quote:

ORIGINAL: poise

That's the same as saying everytime I cross the street I'm going to get hit by a car.
The OP came here for advice and a possible mentor, which to me says they are interested
in learning instead of just jumping into things. They could also be quietly reading all
the other very informative threads here. Not everyone out there is a monster you know.

(in reply to poise)

RE: Looking for a Master to Mentor and lern from - 2/22/2011 6:21:58 AM

Posts: 1362
Joined: 6/17/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: reekon
lol, there is nothing wrong with being but fucked if that's your thang. The key work you missed was "weirdo". Come onI want everyone who has replied here to be real honest. Tell me you can't see this person be in a male or female getting messed over by some prick pretending to be a dom willing to teach?

There are "pricks" in every walk of life....especially on the internet.

I'm not sure how suggesting the OP attend a function like TESS or a class being taught at a local munch would allow the OP, male or female, to be "messed over".

After all...mentor does mean teacher.

I would imagine, though, if you (in the general sense) have no experience with local groups or class/instruction opportunities, it might be difficult to suggest such a thing.

(in reply to reekon)

RE: Looking for a Master to Mentor and lern from - 2/22/2011 6:33:55 AM

poise

Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: reekon

No not everyone is a monster, but all it takes is one and we can all play dumb but from first impressions the masses take him/her as new and not knowing to much about the lifestyle. We all know there is more evil than good out there and he/she is prey.

I don't have alot of friends cause I never was one for being "politically correct" I say what needs to be said and most times say what other feel they can't or shouldn't say. I am very Cynical and never wrong lol

If the OP had this post that you seem to think makes them so vulnerable listed in their profile,
they would more than likely get a reply from more than a few pricks.
However, they posted here in the forums, and probably after a long time lurking the boards
and reading before feeling that we were decent folks on this side.
I don't see how this equates to them not having any common sense, which is
what you are implying.

< Message edited by poise -- 2/22/2011 6:34:23 AM >

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to reekon)

RE: Looking for a Master to Mentor and lern from - 2/22/2011 6:38:54 AM

Posts: 39
Joined: 2/16/2011
Status: offline

I never said they lack common sense, but once again we all know that sometimes sexual desire clouds common sense thinking.

I forgot to add this: common sense really gets blured when dealing with BDSM and kink. This is not a common thing. the masses don't think getting your ass whipped with a paddle while being gagged by a rubber ducky is normal. common sense tells us pain is bad, wanting to be someones slave is wrong, walking around your job with a inserted but plug is not a common thing but alot of kinksters do it.

so common sense?? lol we are erasing the line of what most think is common....

quote:

ORIGINAL: poise

quote:

ORIGINAL: reekon

No not everyone is a monster, but all it takes is one and we can all play dumb but from first impressions the masses take him/her as new and not knowing to much about the lifestyle. We all know there is more evil than good out there and he/she is prey.

I don't have alot of friends cause I never was one for being "politically correct" I say what needs to be said and most times say what other feel they can't or shouldn't say. I am very Cynical and never wrong lol

If the OP had this post that you seem to think makes them so vulnerable listed in their profile,
they would more than likely get a reply from more than a few pricks.
However, they posted here in the forums, and probably after a long time lurking the boards
and reading before feeling that we were decent folks on this side.
I don't see how this equates to them not having any common sense, which is
what you are implying.

< Message edited by reekon -- 2/22/2011 6:45:13 AM >

(in reply to poise)

RE: Looking for a Master to Mentor and lern from - 2/22/2011 6:46:43 AM

poise

Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: reekon

you need to watch yourself, I can see you getting tied up and butt fucked by some weirdo. You are eager and unguided and the wrong person will find you. My advice find a dorkier person than you and lean on him/her in a dominate way, not a bully but dominate way. Once you see them bend just go from there. You can start a lil journal on here so we can read and give you advice on what to try next. I think this will be the safest for you right now.

And yet here you are advising this very inexperienced Dom to find someone and lean on them until they bend.
This sounds just like the type of thing you are saying they themselves are vulnerable to. Make up your mind.

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to reekon)

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