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RE: bootycall ? - 4/28/2011 7:07:17 PM

lovelyesme

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At 51 i need to ask questions that i answered before-in one realm, at age 18-again-because i am using a new lens, if you will- and am in a different realm.

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RE: bootycall ? - 4/28/2011 7:18:10 PM

AneNoz

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I thank you kalikshama, that site will be very useful in the future.

Be at peace
Aneka

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Post #: 42

RE: bootycall ? - 4/28/2011 7:46:20 PM

angelikaJ

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Do his words, actions and behaviors match?

That's a place to start.

If he makes or even suggests promises about your wants and your needs but doesn't keep them, then I would say he really isn't interested in them.

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Post #: 43

RE: bootycall ? - 4/28/2011 8:35:14 PM

Hisprettybaby

Posts: 781
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From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
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quote:

ORIGINAL: BeautifulSufforing

How can you tell if your dom only considers you a booty call ?

The same way you tell if ANY guy does. Do you guys do anything at all together that doesn't resemble sex? Do you spend any "quality time" together outside of sexual activities? If you suggest doing so, does he refuse, or change already-made plans if sex is taken off the table later? For that matter, did you guys get to know each other at all as people before jumping in the sack? It's usually pretty easy to figure that out in short order by the time you're 41 for most women. I may be wrong, but the fact that you have to ask the question in the first place kinda suggests you're already suspecting that's the case.....

~Hisprettybaby~

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Post #: 44

RE: bootycall ? - 4/29/2011 12:02:03 AM

peppermint

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BeautifulSufforing

iam 3mo new into this lifestyle an i like to get different perspective other than my own. before I ask my dom my questions.

MY personal prospective on this.....

If you are only 3 months into knowing about this all as a lifestyle., then you are many months too soon in even looking for a Dominant. Give yourself time. Take 6 months to read, mature, learn and figure out what you want in all of this.

Once you have an idea as to what you really need, then is the time to seek a Dominant, not before.

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Post #: 45

RE: bootycall ? - 4/29/2011 12:20:29 AM

VaguelyCurious

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quote:

ORIGINAL: angelikaJ

Do his words, actions and behaviors match?

That's not entirely fair, angelika. It's possible to be perfectly honest, consistent and ethical about sex for sex' sake. You're assuming that just because she wants more the guy must be stringing her along, but that ain't necessarily so.

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RE: bootycall ? - 4/29/2011 2:09:12 AM

Whiplashsmile4

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ask him!

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Post #: 47

RE: bootycall ? - 4/29/2011 3:43:18 AM

angelikaJ

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quote:

ORIGINAL: VaguelyCurious

quote:

ORIGINAL: angelikaJ

Do his words, actions and behaviors match?

That's not entirely fair, angelika. It's possible to be perfectly honest, consistent and ethical about sex for sex' sake. You're assuming that just because she wants more the guy must be stringing her along, but that ain't necessarily so.

VC...? It was a two part statement and I am a little surprised at you that you didn't catch that.

I entirely agree with you on your point, the context of my second one changes it:
If he makes or even suggests promises about your wants and your needs but doesn't keep them, then I would say he really isn't interested in them.

Edit: clarity and format

< Message edited by angelikaJ -- 4/29/2011 3:48:16 AM >

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RE: bootycall ? - 4/29/2011 1:34:18 PM

VaguelyCurious

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quote:

ORIGINAL: angelikaJ

VC...? It was a two part statement and I am a little surprised at you that you didn't catch that.

Wow. So am I. I think I must have been really tired. Sorry - pretend I didn't say anything, please? :-(

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Post #: 49

RE: bootycall ? - 4/29/2011 1:39:56 PM

angelikaJ

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quote:

ORIGINAL: VaguelyCurious

quote:

ORIGINAL: angelikaJ

VC...? It was a two part statement and I am a little surprised at you that you didn't catch that.

Wow. So am I. I think I must have been really tired. Sorry - pretend I didn't say anything, please? :-(

Is this your way of telling me you miss me?

(...and said what?)

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RE: bootycall ? - 4/29/2011 1:57:26 PM

VaguelyCurious

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Yes, when I miss people I make sure to publicly and utterly misunderstand them!

It's how you should know that I care

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Post #: 51

RE: bootycall ? - 4/29/2011 2:25:02 PM

angelikaJ

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I feel so loved!

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Post #: 52

RE: bootycall ? - 4/29/2011 2:41:41 PM

ResidentSadist

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From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
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quote:

ORIGINAL: BeautifulSufforing
How can you tell if your dom only considers you a booty call ?

not a bad thing at all i just want more than he does unfortunately

I am completely honored by his presence, However I want more

i quess i can chalk it up too lack of communication . i wouldn't have to search for answers like this here if our communication was what it should be . thanks for your input .its greatly appreciated

well i chose my username on my own misspelled on purpose . my dom an i are new so at this point in time .ill take what he offers .however, i know this won't appease me for long .

Top 3 reasons women participate in a mismatched relationship
He can be fixed.
He pursued me.
He’s so exciting.

Someone always loves the other person more. No two people ever loved each other to the exact same degree. The same is true with relationship goals and desires. Someone always wants more or different things than the other person. I do believe it is normal.

If you are a bootycall but wish for more . . . then enjoy the sex while it lasts. Your major goals aren't in alignment and unless one of you has a major paradigm shift, no matter how long the relationship, it won't become more satisfying for you. You should love it (and him) for what it is now, not for what you wish it would become.

< Message edited by ResidentSadist -- 4/29/2011 2:42:13 PM >

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Post #: 53

RE: bootycall ? - 4/29/2011 3:07:41 PM

kalikshama

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Joined: 8/8/2010
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quote:

You should love it (and him) for what it is now, not for what you wish it would become.

Well said!

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Post #: 54

RE: bootycall ? - 4/29/2011 3:50:23 PM

sexyred1

Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

quote:

ORIGINAL: BeautifulSufforing
How can you tell if your dom only considers you a booty call ?

not a bad thing at all i just want more than he does unfortunately

I am completely honored by his presence, However I want more

i quess i can chalk it up too lack of communication . i wouldn't have to search for answers like this here if our communication was what it should be . thanks for your input .its greatly appreciated

well i chose my username on my own misspelled on purpose . my dom an i are new so at this point in time .ill take what he offers .however, i know this won't appease me for long .

Top 3 reasons women participate in a mismatched relationship
He can be fixed.
He pursued me.
He’s so exciting.

Someone always loves the other person more. No two people ever loved each other to the exact same degree. The same is true with relationship goals and desires. Someone always wants more or different things than the other person. I do believe it is normal.

If you are a bootycall but wish for more . . . then enjoy the sex while it lasts. Your major goals aren't in alignment and unless one of you has a major paradigm shift, no matter how long the relationship, it won't become more satisfying for you. You should love it (and him) for what it is now, not for what you wish it would become.

Uh...you know I love ya RS, but I have to disagree with this last thing. It is really easy to say that, rather than to live it.

While the above comments about love may be true in some cases, normally the beginning of something does determine how things go. In every serious relationship I have had, the guy indicated that at the beginning as well. If I meet someone and he said he only wanted a booty call and I did not, I back off.

While having great sex is wonderful, sometimes, you have to hold out for what you want, even at the expense of not having the great sex. Because for some women, the great sex is also emotional, and when they feel connected, it will just be harder to break when and if it does become apparent that it is, only a booty call.

Being true to what you know you need in life is an admirable thing; settling is not.

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Post #: 55

RE: bootycall ? - 4/30/2011 5:23:27 PM

BeautifulSufforing

Posts: 38
Joined: 4/3/2011
From: auburn wa
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well after posting this subject and some time to think about it .I have made my decision on what's acceptable for me I don't give a fuck weather I'm just a booty call or I'm his to do with as he so choices . :) if I need more ill go out and get a temp or two his is poly and I have his approval to do so :) more for me !!

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Post #: 56

RE: bootycall ? - 5/1/2011 1:37:58 PM

MasterSlaveLA

Posts: 3991
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quote:

ORIGINAL: BeautifulSufforing

How can you tell if your dom only considers you a booty call?

You May Be a Booty Call If...

1. He calls/text you at late at night saying that he wants to “hang out” with you. Yeah, he wants to hang his penis in your va jay jay.

2. When you call him, he most likely won’t answer. He may text or call a few days later.

3. You two are never seen together in public, especially in the daytime.

4. You never go out on dates. No dinner or lunch dates. No movies. Just fuck dates.

5. He only texts or have short and impersonal conversations with you. He says just enough to makes you feel he’s paying you some attention to you until it’s time to bust a nut.

6. You have never been to his house or don’t know where he lives. You may meet up with him up outside his residence, work, bus stop, etc. And y’all only have sex at your place, cheap and dingy motels, at Pookie’s and them, etc.

7. He tells you not to fall in love with him or expect a relationship. Or he may even say that he’s not looking to be in a relationship at the moment.

8. Four play is generally rushed or nonexistent.

9. He doesn’t kiss you passionately. He may never kiss you at all.

10. He has detached sex with you. (e.g. hitting it from the back so he doesn’t have to look at you or avoid eye contact during sex)

11. He uses protection with you because he can’t get you pregnant or risk any STDs because he has a wife or steady girlfriend.

12. He never shows you any affection (e.g. kissing, touching, caressing) outside of sex.

13. He cleans up immediately after having sex. He makes sure to get rid of any evidence of the liaison.

14. He makes an excuse to leave your presence after he ejaculates. (e.g. “I have to wake up early in the morning,” or “It’s getting late.”) It was also late when you called me 30 minutes ago. Hmmm…

15. He doesn’t spend the night. And if he has, you can probably can count the rare occasions on one hand.

16. You never cuddle after sex.

17. You never have pillow talk after sex.

18. You have never met any of his friends or family members. He also has no interest in meeting yours either.

19. He doesn’t want anyone to know that you two are messing around. He may even request discretion especially if you all know the same people.

20. He doesn’t share many details of his personal life or may deflect certain questions asked about it.

21. You don’t feel comfortable going to him for help of any kind.

22. He doesn’t celebrate holidays and birthdays with you. You may be lucky enough to get a text message.

23. He lets you know that you’re not the only woman he’s seeing or interested in. (e.g. A former booty buddy told me that my friend was attractive and he secretly wanted to have sex with her.)

24. You are not his friend on any social networking sites. He may fear you may expose him or find out details about his personal life.

Link: http://paramourinwaiting.wordpress.com/2011/04/04/you-may-be-a-booty-call-if/